EPT![[image loading]](http://www.iccup.com/upload/images/gallery/10884/n89947.jpg)
It was an excellent week for Team UED Academy in the C-Ranks Teamleague, a StarCraft: BroodWar tournament for all of us middle-of-the-road people stuck helplessly in between the red and blue ranks. Although the actual festivities kick off next week, we decided to band together and practice this weekend for the upcoming clusterfuck that is sure to ensue!
Our practice session went very well. Nobody showed up and our team leader logged offline with no explanation. Telecom and Seriosity hung out in Op wOk to talk about various strategic theories, and even the possibility of world peace. I didn't play today because I'm still upset about NBC's Chuck being cancelled, despite the fact that all the episodes are ridiculously similar to each other when you think about them. Also, unfortunately, one of our PvT snipers, Gecko[Xp], from the former semi-pro dutch team [Xp], was forced to bow out of the league when his university unexpectedly dropped 70 metric tons of bricks on him. The bricks, of course, are a metaphor for the absurdly assiduous assignments delegated by the proprietors of higher learning just to watch their students squirm around in anguish.
With Gecko falling victim to the vile stench of real-life, our team was saddened greatly, and we held a candle-lit vigil for the slain, but vowed to press onward. Johny23 and Telecom (aka Ever)P(Telecom, aka Telecom[Name] aka n.Die_Telecom aka iGaMe)Telecom aka GGzerG) assured everyone involved that our team was still wildly overpowered and pretty much invincible. Which we are. Of course, such confidence in competition always stirs the emotions of the esteemed competitors, who were quick to voice their opinions that we somehow had some kind of weaknesses. Eywa-, captain of the coincidentally-named "Eywa's Team", took the opportunity to use his virtually unheard-of pseudo-magazine to bash on our beloved team, leading me to ask the question: "You dissin' me, dawg?"
To quote his publication:
Looking at the teams, first off lead by Anklebreak, we have the UED Academy who are going to eliminate their opposition with [excessive bad manner] absolutely stellar play. We have what has been named the Samsung Khan of CRTL, a massively Protoss team. The members:
Protoss – Ankle, Johny, Gecko, Burbon, Seriosity and Cloak.
Zerg – NinaZerg
Racepickers – Telecom
Now, you may be asking why this team is referred to as that which will win through excessive bad manner true gosu gameplay. And, I do believe a few searches on TL would give you a good idea as to why! Obviously, everyone wants to know how long it takes for one of these team members to blow up on another... All jokes aside, they actually do have quite a strong line up, however, they‟ll be easily countered by Protoss snipers.
Now, let's forget about all his grammatical errors and nauseating over-utilization of the good ol' "cross-out what I really mean and then continue" joke throughout the 12-page publication, and the fact that Ankle and Seriosity play Terran, not Protoss, and focus on the real error here:
YOU THINK WE'RE BM? LMAO KID SO BAD GO BACK TO SLUMS OF MUMBAI EZ PZ.
Yeah, I visited Clan X17. I learned from the best in the biz. What really strikes me as odd about this whole thing is that none of us have really said anything really "bad mannered" yet in the C-Rank League Post, but are preemptively being pointed out as the villains of the league. But, for the record, JUST TO MAKE YOU ALL HAPPY, I did not say that our team was the Samsung Khan of CRTL. I just remarked that we were LIKE Samsung Khan because of all the Protoss players. No C-rank team deserves to be compared, skill-wise, to Samsung Khan. That would just be absurd.
With that, I've proposed that we overthrow Anklebreak, and rename our team to Team Evil, after the soccer team in the Stephen Chow classic, Shaolin Soccer.
