EPTI may have just done something incredibily stupid. - Page 2
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Navane
Netherlands2749 Posts
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a176
Canada6688 Posts
it doesnt matter if youre gay, straight, or bi. you can be man enough to admit and accept homosexuality. you can be man enough to tell other people about it. so why scared to accept hetero tendencies? as far as the girl goes. im not sure about your past relationship experience, but believe me. you will always fall for other people if you dont find love with one person. you dont need to feel you have to put all your eggs in one basket. to be successful in relationship you need to be not scared of direct confrontation. there is no shame in admitting you like someone. | ||
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MacroNcheesE
United States508 Posts
On February 14 2011 18:51 a176 wrote: being a man means not hiding behind anything and grabbing life by the balls That's not "being a man" that's being happy and content. | ||
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yourwhiteshadow
United States442 Posts
On February 14 2011 18:37 Belial88 wrote: ...right. Girls find it SO hot that a guy has to have contingency plans just to say I like you. God forbid you guys ever have passionate sex one day (girls do think about this...). Really on the bad foot here, confront her *like a man*. It takes balls, and the more balls it takes the more she respects you. Even if you trick her into dating some unattractive, nonspontaneous 'coward' she'll be miserable, and break up when she figures it out. Show her your faults, your insecurities, your goofyness, and she'll love you all the more for it. She will find out sooner or later. Just sounds like you don't have the balls to be with this girl, she's clearly too much woman for you to handle, am I wrong? I'm not trying to be a dick, but there are clear gender roles in man/feman relationships. Take charge. And she's your friend, I can't believe you'd be this roundabout and deceptive to your best friend. You really think she'll like these games? What do you expect to happen? Oh, you like me and aren't gay, sweet let me break up with my good boyfriend to date you. No. No! Tell her how you feel, and it's clear where things are. Just be honest about what's going on. Take control of the situation. Never, ever force a girl to ask you out. By writing her a letter you're forcing her to make the decision of being with you or not (past an approving smile). A woman likes to be asked out, to be given attention. Don't *EVER* play the role of the woman, don't ever put her in the position to figure it out. Because if a woman has to ask a man out, chances are she won't find it worth it. And yea, i get it. some woman ask men out blah blah blah. You really need to figure woman out, and if you had the experience I'd tell you that maybe this boyfriend isn't an issue at all. Treat her like she isn't dating anyone. But you clearly aren't at that level, so just tell her how you feel honestly, and do your thing while you wait for her to have her fill of sex with this guy, get bored, and jump to you. Or you can handle the situation. Or, you can just leave it, wish her happy, and when the time comes, be there - and it won't be creepy because she'll know you like her and waiting for her. Jesus, at least if you don't listen to me just realize the mistake in a letter. Just GOOGLE if it ever worked. Ask girls at your job, or school "hey, has a guy ever written you a love letter?" umm LOL. i hate to be blunt, but this person is right on the money. writing a letter was what i did in elementary school. then in middle school i had a friend ask out some girl for me, that didn't go too well. i remember girls telling me that getting asked out to a dance by text was super lame, so i'm not sure if confessing love via a letter is such a great idea. besides, if you talk in person you can pretty much read girls by using certain words and seeing their reaction, and you can play it safe that way. girls like to be told "i love you" in person if possible, if not in person then at least on the phone. text and letters don't even count in this day and age. it might have been chivalrous like 90 years ago. i would highly suggest you talk to her...in person. | ||
Sayle
United Kingdom3685 Posts
And Kerotan. This is why you should be more like me. Spend your Valentine's day doing ICCup work and bemoaning the single life with Spec. | ||
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guN-viCe
United States687 Posts
 Of course we talked in person too, but it's a good way to let express yourself fully, without interruption. | ||
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KurtistheTurtle
United States1966 Posts
On February 14 2011 18:37 Belial88 wrote: ...right. Girls find it SO hot that a guy has to have contingency plans just to say I like you. God forbid you guys ever have passionate sex one day (girls do think about this...). Really on the bad foot here, confront her *like a man*. It takes balls, and the more balls it takes the more she respects you. Even if you trick her into dating some unattractive, nonspontaneous 'coward' she'll be miserable, and break up when she figures it out. Show her your faults, your insecurities, your goofyness, and she'll love you all the more for it. She will find out sooner or later. ... What do you expect to happen? Oh, you like me and aren't gay, sweet let me break up with my good boyfriend to date you. No. No! ... Jesus, at least if you don't listen to me just realize the mistake in a letter. Just GOOGLE if it ever worked. Ask girls at your job, or school "hey, has a guy ever written you a love letter?" watch out, your insecurity is showing through. go somewhere else dick. | ||
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KurtistheTurtle
United States1966 Posts
On February 14 2011 19:15 yourwhiteshadow wrote: umm LOL. i hate to be blunt, but this person is right on the money. writing a letter was what i did in elementary school. then in middle school i had a friend ask out some girl for me, that didn't go too well. i remember girls telling me that getting asked out to a dance by text was super lame, so i'm not sure if confessing love via a letter is such a great idea. besides, if you talk in person you can pretty much read girls by using certain words and seeing their reaction, and you can play it safe that way. girls like to be told "i love you" in person if possible, if not in person then at least on the phone. text and letters don't even count in this day and age. it might have been chivalrous like 90 years ago. i would highly suggest you talk to her...in person. first, stop kicking a man when he's down. he's not looking for expert advice, he needs somebody to tell about whats on his mind at 6 am. you'd be nervous too. second, a well-written passionate love-letter is something every woman secretly wants. if you don't have the balls behind it in the first place it won't work but if you do--its fucking gold. a love letter pulled off well is something a woman will remember the rest of her life and keep in a chest in the attic. do not bash the love letter because it didn't work for you. so what you wrote it in elementary school, love doesn't have an age limit. | ||
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paper
13196 Posts
More likely than not, she's going to reject your feelings. By writing a letter, you obviously can't express your feelings to her face, so how is she going to respond back if you clearly don't like direct contact? Why would she be interested in someone who can't even articulate his thoughts to her? The housing situation will become extremely awkward with a vigilant boyfriend, and you'll probably lose most of your emotional ties with this girl. On the off-chance that she does mirror your feelings, you'll still have to deal with the housing situation. Are you just going to kick out her new boyfriend? Do you really want to be with someone willing drop a new boyfriend like that? Chasing girls is a waste of time, and chasing one girl is an even bigger waste of time. You should ignore your feelings for this one girl, verify your sexual orientation by going out and meeting other (attractive) girls/boys, and improve yourself (GYM, TAN, LAUNDRY) to build up confidence. You'll find a girl 10x better than this girl you know right now, guaranteed. | ||
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KurtistheTurtle
United States1966 Posts
well this IS the woman. the feelings are there, they're real, and hes acting on them in the best way he knows how. thats what going for it really means. stop spouting this shit, stop cutting at his knees, and whether it works or doesnt its better to have tried than to delude and procrastinate under the pretense of self-improvement | ||
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Pathology
Canada132 Posts
*edit spelling* lolol 5am | ||
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Sm3agol
United States2055 Posts
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Kerotan
England2109 Posts
Right the outcome seems to be abject failure based on the lack of daily communication I get from her and from some of the more critical replies in thread. | ||
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DND_Enkil
Sweden598 Posts
On February 14 2011 15:54 Kerotan wrote: Now, I sit at my desk playing the waiting game, having walked the mile or so to her house. This act could ruin my friendship with 4 people, then again I could be with someone I'm fucking crazy about. Wish me luck, I'm going to need it. Good luck! Any update yet? Can't agree with writing a love letter, especially anonymously, but done is done. The die is cast. | ||
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paper
13196 Posts
On February 14 2011 21:27 KurtistheTurtle wrote: i wonder how many more unsolicited replies will spit this same "what youre doing is wrong, improve yourself, go to gym buy better clothes date more women!" well this IS the woman. the feelings are there, they're real, and hes acting on them in the best way he knows how. thats what going for it really means. stop spouting this shit, stop cutting at his knees, and whether it works or doesnt its better to have tried than to delude and procrastinate under the pretense of self-improvement The chance that writing a love letter to a girl from a guy she perceived as gay actually works is extremely slim. When would she have ever had the opportunity to develop feelings for him? They're instantly shot down when she remembers that he's fucking gay. Here's an exercise for you: recall the last time you were hanging out with your best male friend(s) and contemplated how much you would love them if they were the opposite sex. You can't. He's essentially putting her on a pedestal by giving her complete control of the situation and ultimately his feelings. His immediate future is at her whim. Tell me, does he display any self-respect or confidence by doing that? There are better ways of going about this than writing a love letter, like improving himself and his confidence and letting girls chase him instead. | ||
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DND_Enkil
Sweden598 Posts
On February 14 2011 21:57 Kerotan wrote: Right the outcome seems to be abject failure based on the lack of daily communication I get from her and from some of the more critical replies in thread. Love letters usually fail, but your case are so bloody unique so i doubt no one here has had the exact same thing happened. Still wishing you good luck, if you have not heard anything by the end of the day i would reccomend texting her and telling her you would like to speak to her and ask her to come over. | ||
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jlim
Spain943 Posts
just be sincere to her no matter in what fashion you do so and you'll have done your 100%. if she likes you she'll start something with you and if she doesn't, she'll reject you. as easy as that. if she's worthy she will feel the sincerity of your words and will answer you back with the same sincerity. if she falls for any of the many strats, tricks and role-playing attitudes displayed by my fellow liquidians maybe she's not worth your devotion, unless you're contented with that, of course. anyways, your choice. P.S: why the anonymous? in the letter I mean | ||
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6xy
Philippines51 Posts
good luck bro, as courage wolf says, only the right one will say "yes" | ||
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quirinus
Croatia2489 Posts
 edit: btw, please update | ||
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mesohawny
Canada193 Posts
Really, my bet is that she thinks her boyfriend wrote it and she'll probably give him a sloppy BJ now... success. | ||
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