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So, there is this girl I really like but I don't really know how to man up and just tell her in person. I was thinking a lot about this and I came to the conclusion that sending a love letter would be a great option to consider.
Keep in mind that we already did some activities together (call it dating), we are going to the same school so we each other quite often, etc. We are becoming really good friends and I came to the conclusion that I really like her more than just a friend...
BUT, I wouldn't know if it would be wise to send a love letter. Has anyone on this board have experience with it? Did you send one yourself or did you receive one? How did you/the person you sent it to react? Should I just grow some balls and tell her that I love her?
I like her so much but I'm way too shy for this kind of stuff, haha! I hope to get some advice from you guys. If needed, I can post the letter that I wrote.
 
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and I came to the conclusion that sending a love letter would be a great option to consider.
Don't. Seriously. If you want the girl to respect you, you'll tell it to her face. If you can't, then it's not meant to be.
Keep in mind that we already did some activities together (call it dating)
No, don't call it 'dating'. Unless an activity is explicitly prephased as "hey, wanna go to xxx on a date?", it's not a date - it's simply a social activity with a friend. Huge difference.
If you can't tell her to her face that you fancy her, how can she expect you to perform confidently in any couple-related situation at all?
Should I just grow some balls and tell her that I love her?
No. You should grow some balls and tell her that you kinda like her, and would like to get to know her better. Like, take her on a date.
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MrHoon
10183 Posts
as long as you don't write stuff like "my love for you burns like the thousand suns in the skies, while my lust for you bursts like the sperm whale's mating call"
To me, asking a girl out over mail/txtmsgs is never a good idea, but I know a few people who managed to do it and dated for a loooong time. Showing the girl you have to confidence to ask her out in person is a plus and be totally cool about it is a better way imo.
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Tell her. Straight up.
It shows sincerity on your part and also makes you look manly/brave.
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EXACTLY what I was thinking. This is why I'm still thinking about it over and over again. I think I should ask her out again and then tell her or something... God, it's killing me so hard! Thoughts going back and forth at lightspeed.
Still, I'd like to know if other people here experienced receiving/sending love letters.
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This might sound harsh but it'll help if you reframe your own position. You don't REALLY like her. You don't know her well enough for that to be the case yet. Rather you really like the idea of her. You like what you know so far and you're interested in finding more out.
If you go from that position you'll be more confident and also more able to move on if you should find disappointment this time. There are lots of interesting and attractive girls in the world so don't put all your eggs in one basket before you've even hate a single date with a girl.
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On December 30 2010 23:36 gonkulator wrote:
Still, I'd like to know if other people here experienced receiving/sending love letters.
I got a love letter from a girl once... in sixth grade - and that kind of stuff stays there.
It was cute, but really, that's all it is.
Look at it in risk-to-reward, the higher the risk the greater the chance for return.
Send a letter, low risk > low chance of return.
Man up and tell her straight up, high risk > higher chance of return.
Not the best example, but yeah, I just woke up.
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Call me old fashion but send her a letter i always wanted to know what will happened.
No really no letters and definitely dont use your friend to tell her you kind of like her ! NO ! its time to man up and you should tell it to her face to face. its not so hard just tell her if she wants to go out.
You can do it.
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This one time I sent a letter to a girl but then her mom ended up reading it first, then her dad, then her little bro and then her.
Laughter echo'd through my little town that day and I was forever known as that guy who draws smily faces and hearts sideways in real life
Go on a date couple times, buy her food, don't be omg pressure, and dont send love letters
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Two criteria to think about:
1. Is she Asian?
Asian girls love this kinda shit cuz they don't have to make up their mind on the spot. You do it in person they gotta be in an awkward situation and have to come up with an answer there and then.
2. Do her friends like you?
If you give her enough time, she'll ask her friends. If you think thats +points for you, then this route looks better.
Yes yes... man up and all, but by the awkward laugh you put in your post I'm gonna assume you're between 13 and 15 and I'll give you some time to get through puberty, so to some extent this is forgivable.
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10387 Posts
love letters sound cute :3 but that kind of stuff should stay in elementary/mangas/stories sadly..
Like everyone else is saying, just go ask her out on dates and stuff lol
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Are you in high school? If so, fine. If you're in any higher level of education, man up.
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White. Probably 15.
Also, no dont do it you wuss
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Love letters are incredibly romantic and a great way to let a gal know you're an old-fashioned gentleman. Here is a letter I wrote to a girl. She's gone now, but I think the letter still works. Feel free to use any or all of it in your letter.
Dear Jenny,
Wow, it was tough to find your address this time! How did we ever live without the internet? I like your new apartment, although the landlord seems a bit nosy. I guess that’s New York for you! How are you feeling? I saw some empty bottles of cough medicine in your garbage; I hope you’re doing all right. It would be a shame for you to be stuck in bed and not get to show off that lovely new hair color. You look so different I almost didn’t recognize you, but your scent was unmistakable.
My feelings for you are like the spark between Will Smith and Gabrielle Union in the smash-hit action film Bad Boys II. Their love was forbidden, too. See, police officer Mike Lowrey (Smith) falls for Syd Burnett (Union), who also happens to be the sister of his partner Marcus (played by versatile funnyman Martin Lawrence). Mike is afraid to tell Marcus as their professional relationship is already strained by multiple compounding issues. Their ongoing investigation into ecstasy smuggling gets complicated by the fact that Marcus is having doubts about the future of their partnership. Part of this is because Mike accidentally shot Marcus in the buttocks while they raided a KKK meeting. I once shot a deer in the buttocks and it lived, and then I got lost in the woods.
So Mike and Marcus are investigating known Cuban drug lord Johnny Tapia (played by Jordi Mollà, whom Union called “The Tom Cruise of Spain”) and his illicit dealings. At one point they pretend to be exterminators to plant a bug in Tapia’s house, and they see some rats having sex! I’m not sure if the rats were real as Mr. Bay has not returned my letters yet. That’s ok though, he’s a busy man and I can wait. I’m very good at waiting. So Syd gets entangled with Johnny Tapia as well as she is an undercover DEA agent. Soon, things escalate and Marcus and Mike are forced to risk everything to save her when she’s kidnapped and brought to Cuba. Along the way there is some funny banter and lots of action. I think on our first date we should watch Bad Boys II. I know you’re thinking we can’t because I already spoiled it for you, but trust me when I say you can watch this movie every day and never get tired of all It has to offer. I’m currently on my 5th Blu-ray copy. Did you know DVDs and Blu-ray discs could wear out from use? They can.
I think what I am trying to say is that I would risk the relationship with my lifelong best friend and cop partner to be with you. Please let me know if you feel the same way. I will be waiting in the silver Camry parked across the street from your apartment building every day this week.
We will ride and die together,
Jack
PS you should cut up or shred important mail that you throw out so someone bad (like Johnny Tapia) doesn’t find out too much about you when they go through your garbage. Also, I have enclosed some strands of hair with the follicles still attached as they have gotten into the envelope and I can’t get them out. It’s my only envelope.
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You don't love her, wtf. You might love the idea of her.
Love letters are something that are great to use once you are actually in a relationship, so fuck all the people that say they are silly. Women love them alooooooot.
But for asking them out, it makes you look like you're 5. Just confront her, it's hard but you'll thank yourself some day.
Is it fair to guess age and aim for you being 16ish? I might even aim younger, but kids these days.
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On December 31 2010 00:16 JackMcCoy wrote:
Love letters are incredibly romantic and a great way to let a gal know you're an old-fashioned gentleman. Here is a letter I wrote to a girl. She's gone now, but I think the letter still works. Feel free to use any or all of it in your letter.
Dear Jenny,
Wow, it was tough to find your address this time! How did we ever live without the internet? I like your new apartment, although the landlord seems a bit nosy. I guess that’s New York for you! How are you feeling? I saw some empty bottles of cough medicine in your garbage; I hope you’re doing all right. It would be a shame for you to be stuck in bed and not get to show off that lovely new hair color. You look so different I almost didn’t recognize you, but your scent was unmistakable.
My feelings for you are like the spark between Will Smith and Gabrielle Union in the smash-hit action film Bad Boys II. Their love was forbidden, too. See, police officer Mike Lowrey (Smith) falls for Syd Burnett (Union), who also happens to be the sister of his partner Marcus (played by versatile funnyman Martin Lawrence). Mike is afraid to tell Marcus as their professional relationship is already strained by multiple compounding issues. Their ongoing investigation into ecstasy smuggling gets complicated by the fact that Marcus is having doubts about the future of their partnership. Part of this is because Mike accidentally shot Marcus in the buttocks while they raided a KKK meeting. I once shot a deer in the buttocks and it lived, and then I got lost in the woods.
So Mike and Marcus are investigating known Cuban drug lord Johnny Tapia (played by Jordi Mollà, whom Union called “The Tom Cruise of Spain”) and his illicit dealings. At one point they pretend to be exterminators to plant a bug in Tapia’s house, and they see some rats having sex! I’m not sure if the rats were real as Mr. Bay has not returned my letters yet. That’s ok though, he’s a busy man and I can wait. I’m very good at waiting. So Syd gets entangled with Johnny Tapia as well as she is an undercover DEA agent. Soon, things escalate and Marcus and Mike are forced to risk everything to save her when she’s kidnapped and brought to Cuba. Along the way there is some funny banter and lots of action. I think on our first date we should watch Bad Boys II. I know you’re thinking we can’t because I already spoiled it for you, but trust me when I say you can watch this movie every day and never get tired of all It has to offer. I’m currently on my 5th Blu-ray copy. Did you know DVDs and Blu-ray discs could wear out from use? They can.
I think what I am trying to say is that I would risk the relationship with my lifelong best friend and cop partner to be with you. Please let me know if you feel the same way. I will be waiting in the silver Camry parked across the street from your apartment building every day this week.
We will ride and die together,
Jack
PS you should cut up or shred important mail that you throw out so someone bad (like Johnny Tapia) doesn’t find out too much about you when they go through your garbage. Also, I have enclosed some strands of hair with the follicles still attached as they have gotten into the envelope and I can’t get them out. It’s my only envelope.
Hey man you should spoiler this, otherwise your gona get alot of pms asking you out on a date.
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Scratch all that other advice, use JackMcCoy's letter - spot on Jack, spot on.
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United Kingdom16710 Posts
Whatever you do, you should do it soon because it is so easy to get stuck in that 'friend zone' especially for girls. A letter is ok i guess but it is much better to do it in person. I've been rejected a couple of time in person to know how much it hurts but you can also start to move on quicker because you heard it straight up. Well, whatever you decide to do, good luck and i hope she feels the same way.
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Loveletters can probably work in some cases, but when they do it is most likely when the girl is all ready into you. Which means your relationship could easily evolve beyond being friends even without such loveletter.
However, if you are gonna write it anyway, its probably best to avoid going on and on with sugarcoated cliches. Just tell her how you feel for her and why you would like to be more than friends. Then, if she feels the same, you can move on from there in-person.
Good luck, whatever you chose to do
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On December 31 2010 00:16 JackMcCoy wrote:+ Show Spoiler +Love letters are incredibly romantic and a great way to let a gal know you're an old-fashioned gentleman. Here is a letter I wrote to a girl. She's gone now, but I think the letter still works. Feel free to use any or all of it in your letter.
Dear Jenny,
Wow, it was tough to find your address this time! How did we ever live without the internet? I like your new apartment, although the landlord seems a bit nosy. I guess that’s New York for you! How are you feeling? I saw some empty bottles of cough medicine in your garbage; I hope you’re doing all right. It would be a shame for you to be stuck in bed and not get to show off that lovely new hair color. You look so different I almost didn’t recognize you, but your scent was unmistakable.
My feelings for you are like the spark between Will Smith and Gabrielle Union in the smash-hit action film Bad Boys II. Their love was forbidden, too. See, police officer Mike Lowrey (Smith) falls for Syd Burnett (Union), who also happens to be the sister of his partner Marcus (played by versatile funnyman Martin Lawrence). Mike is afraid to tell Marcus as their professional relationship is already strained by multiple compounding issues. Their ongoing investigation into ecstasy smuggling gets complicated by the fact that Marcus is having doubts about the future of their partnership. Part of this is because Mike accidentally shot Marcus in the buttocks while they raided a KKK meeting. I once shot a deer in the buttocks and it lived, and then I got lost in the woods.
So Mike and Marcus are investigating known Cuban drug lord Johnny Tapia (played by Jordi Mollà, whom Union called “The Tom Cruise of Spain”) and his illicit dealings. At one point they pretend to be exterminators to plant a bug in Tapia’s house, and they see some rats having sex! I’m not sure if the rats were real as Mr. Bay has not returned my letters yet. That’s ok though, he’s a busy man and I can wait. I’m very good at waiting. So Syd gets entangled with Johnny Tapia as well as she is an undercover DEA agent. Soon, things escalate and Marcus and Mike are forced to risk everything to save her when she’s kidnapped and brought to Cuba. Along the way there is some funny banter and lots of action. I think on our first date we should watch Bad Boys II. I know you’re thinking we can’t because I already spoiled it for you, but trust me when I say you can watch this movie every day and never get tired of all It has to offer. I’m currently on my 5th Blu-ray copy. Did you know DVDs and Blu-ray discs could wear out from use? They can.
I think what I am trying to say is that I would risk the relationship with my lifelong best friend and cop partner to be with you. Please let me know if you feel the same way. I will be waiting in the silver Camry parked across the street from your apartment building every day this week.
We will ride and die together,
Jack
PS you should cut up or shred important mail that you throw out so someone bad (like Johnny Tapia) doesn’t find out too much about you when they go through your garbage. Also, I have enclosed some strands of hair with the follicles still attached as they have gotten into the envelope and I can’t get them out. It’s my only envelope.
You say she's gone now, but what happened when she got the letter? And why is she gone, what exactly happened to her? There are so many possibilities!
p.s. Funniest thing I've read on TL in a while, well done =D
And to the OP, don't send a letter. It shows you're not very confident, girls (generally) don't like that. Just ask her out on a date and see what happens. DON'T tell her you love her.
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EPT
