• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EST 17:52
CET 23:52
KST 07:52
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
[ASL22] Finals Preview: Sweet Victory!12[ASL22] Ro4 Preview: Mirror Mirror6[ASL22] Ro8 Preview: Within Reach5[ASL22] Ro8 Preview: In A Tizzy11[ASL22] Ro16 Preview: Holy Diver5
Community News
Dark completes military service, returns to SC28[BSL23] RO16 Group Stage19Weekly Cups (Nov 2-8): herO back on top?2Weekly Cups (Oct 26 - Nov 1): MaxPax, herO, Solar win0Weekly Cups (October 19-25): Clem triples first in 5.0.175
StarCraft 2
General
No more SC2 streamers on team liquid? Dark completes military service, returns to SC2 Greetings.. Serral's getting trashed by New Catsle's Mind Weekly Cups (Nov 2-8): herO back on top?
Tourneys
Dark returns! GSL CK #7 4v4 Team Battle (Nov 19) Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond) soO & FanTaSy return! SC2 Kevin Scrim 4v4 (Nov 16) RSL goes to London! 2026 Offline Finals Nov 21-22 Tasteless Time Warp: SC Evo Showmatch (May 25)
Strategy
[H] ZvP Mid-Late Game: Stalkers Collossi HT
Custom Maps
[G] How to playtest arcade maps Starcraft 2 Advance [D] the control group Simple Questions/Answers
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 551 Robotic Revival Mutation # 550 Graveyard Shift Mutation # 549 Endless Sparkles
Brood War
General
BW General Discussion HELPls! The old replay video w full HD resolution List of top players active on ShieldBattery Recommended BW Settings for Mouse and Video Starcraft:Brood War Discord Servers
Tourneys
Bisu's Team vs Shuttle's Team 2026-11-14 2v2v2v2 Tournament Stage 1: Community Poll [BSL23] Ro16 Group C - Sunday 21:00 CET Small VOD Thread 2.0
Strategy
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Pluto's TvP 5Marine 2Medic Push Infested Terran strategies in 2026 Nuke strategy worked in K-League 2026-11-09
Other Games
General Games
Free Space RTS Game, optimised f. Phone/Tablet etc Nintendo Switch Thread List of Game Threads The PlayStation 5 Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread
Dota 2
Can Game Data Analytics Help Players Improvements
League of Legends
[TL LoL EUW IHs] Teemo shall perish
Heroes of the Storm
Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread Trading/Investing Thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Dating: How's your luck?
Fan Clubs
Fan Club Resource Thread Reynor Fan Club The Flash Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! Anime Discussion Thread [Manga] One Piece
Sports
TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 Football (Soccer) Thread MLB/Baseball 2023
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List Recent Gifted Posts
Blogs
VCT 2027 America Kickoff LAT…
anakin.
The time I organised my…
AssyrianKing
Why I built Repalyzer (1.1.…
BlueStar
Innovate or Game Over?
TrAiDoS
ShieldBattery on Mac
Kraekkling
[ASL22] Ro4 Day1 Ticket Giv…
bITt.mAN
Can Bots Beat Pros?? Starcr…
namkraft
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 11940 users

Starcraft Beards

Blogs > SirJolt
Post a Reply
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4016 Posts
September 05 2010 23:13 GMT
#1
You can tell a lot about how a man plays Starcraft from the state of his facial hair. Generally, the guys you play on Battle.net won’t have particularly formidable facial hair, but let’s say you’re in a tournament, things are getting rough, you need to know as much about your next opponent as possible, without him learning about you.

Using techniques developed by the FBI to help with criminal profiling, you could learn more about their play style than you’d imagine, simply by investigating an opponent’s facial hair.

Classic Zergling Stubble:

It’s nothing fancy, it practically manages itself. While everyone else is sitting around waiting for their beard to grow to an appreciable length, managing everything carefully, there’s a guy out there who shaved at nine o’clock this morning running around with what passes for a bit of a beard by the evening.

[image loading]

This is the six-pool of beards. You’re sitting there, building up your workers, and you’re pretty sure you’ve got things under control, then, just as you scout, bam, there are already zerglings on the way. It’s reasonably elegant, and it’s there sooner than you’d expect.

It’s a panic-beard.


Burrowed Roaches:

There are times when you’re scouting around, and you just cannot for the life of you find a beard. I mean, clearly this guy has something going on in his chin region, but a beard it ain’t. There’s nothing going on you could see without specialised equipment.

[image loading]

Burrowed roaches. I’m telling you man, you see a guy with this chin, that’s what’s up. Think of it in purely literal terms… something horrifying, lurking just beneath the surface, and it’s full of greenish goo. No matter how hard you try to kill it, it’s going to come back later.

Horrifying.

Bristling Defense:

There are always going to be some who go the extra mile when it comes to preening their beard. They keep everything in order, make sure that every single hair is brushed into the right position.

[image loading]

Think about it, a face lined with spines = a base lined with spine crawlers, turrets, or photon cannons. I’m not saying this is something you can 100% rely on all the time, but I am saying that I guarantee it’s something you can rely on every single time. It’s never wrong.

This is exactly the kind of beard a turtle would grow. Or a sea tortoise maybe.

Sauron Zerg:

This one is a bit harder to spot, but one of the big helps is that people who play in a particular style might have more than just a beard to tell you what they’re thinking. In some cases, it’s a question of body language and comportment.

[image loading]

This guy has Sauron Zerg written all over him. I mean, look at how well he’s microing those bees to keep them out of his ears! The man is clearly in control of a vast number of tiny things all at once. There’s also a version that indicates that a player has an affinity for overlords and may be hoping to get a good drop in, but it’s a bit rarer.


+ Show Spoiler +


The overlord beard:

[image loading]



Cheese Beards:

There are a few beards that indicate that your opponent might be up to something a bit cheesier than you’d normally need to prepare for. The most obvious of these is the straight up beard-made-out-of-canned-cheese.

[image loading]

It should be fairly easy to spot. Others tend to centre around the essential deception of the beard itself. In these situations, you’ll need to keep a close eye on just what the beard is trying to say, versus what’s going on in the background. I’ve included a number of examples.

+ Show Spoiler +


[image loading]

And the ever popular:

[image loading]



Honorable Mentions:

+ Show Spoiler +


Fast Robo:

[image loading]

Storm Beard:

So named for its infamously patchy nature and the potentially hit-and-miss quality of the beard depending on the player.

[image loading]

Off Expansion:

You know when you check someone's base, and everything's where it should be, nothing's out of place, then all of a sudden they have expansions in fucking ridiculous places?

[image loading]




****
Moderator@SirJolt
r33k
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Italy3402 Posts
September 05 2010 23:24 GMT
#2
Beards are awesome.
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
September 05 2010 23:29 GMT
#3
I think the hidden expansion is the best one :O They are all great though.
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26782 Posts
September 05 2010 23:38 GMT
#4
On September 06 2010 08:29 Najda wrote:
I think the hidden expansion is the best one :O They are all great though.

I agree heartily with your statement.

SirJolt you always provide amusing blogs.
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
deathgod6
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States5064 Posts
September 05 2010 23:46 GMT
#5
lol great blog.
4.0 GPA = A rank 5.0 GPA = Olympic --------- Bisu, Best, Fantasy. i ♥ oov. They can get in my BoxeR anyday.
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4016 Posts
September 05 2010 23:55 GMT
#6
On September 06 2010 08:38 flamewheel wrote:
SirJolt you always provide amusing blogs.


Thanks F, very much appreciated
Moderator@SirJolt
Adeny
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Norway1233 Posts
September 06 2010 00:06 GMT
#7
You forgot the most important one: The Adeny beard.
endy
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Switzerland8971 Posts
September 06 2010 00:19 GMT
#8
nice blog. and some incredibly funny pictures
ॐ
PH
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States6173 Posts
September 06 2010 00:52 GMT
#9
amazing. 5/5.
Hello
Kinky
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States4126 Posts
September 06 2010 01:09 GMT
#10
On September 06 2010 09:06 Adeny wrote:
You forgot the most important one: The Adeny beard.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYi24D9lHqc

That's a pretty sick beard
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4016 Posts
September 06 2010 01:55 GMT
#11
That beard is among the most impressive things I've ever seen :D
Moderator@SirJolt
Defeat
Profile Joined March 2010
United States476 Posts
September 06 2010 03:58 GMT
#12
Nice blog sir :}>
"the metagame has really evolved to the point where the best chance to win the metagame is to game the metagame" -Bags
OpticalShot
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Canada6330 Posts
September 06 2010 04:06 GMT
#13
Omg hidden expo lolol
[TLMS] REBOOT
hp.Shell
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States2527 Posts
September 06 2010 04:26 GMT
#14
[image loading]
Please PM me with any songs you like that you think I haven't heard before!
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4016 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-09-07 14:33:15
September 07 2010 14:32 GMT
#15
I saw a couple of really amazing moustaches/beards like the above, but couldn't link them to StarCraft in any way, and so had to sideline them. It felt bad to do so

Truly they are majestic beasts.
Moderator@SirJolt
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
The PiG Daily
07:00
Best Games of SC
Clem vs MaxPax
herO vs Solar
SHIN vs TBD
PiGStarcraft366
LiquipediaDiscussion
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
PiGStarcraft366
elazer 211
Nathanias 80
EmSc Tv 17
StarCraft: Brood War
Pusan 87
Terrorterran 26
LuMiX 2
Counter-Strike
allub371
jkaem153
Other Games
summit1g6032
tarik_tv5575
Grubby2256
Liquid`Hasu211
syndereN162
C9.Mang0151
PPMD26
Chillindude17
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick1599
BasetradeTV142
StarCraft 2
angryscii 41
EmSc Tv 17
EmSc2Tv 17
[ Show 14 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Hupsaiya 87
• StrangeGG 31
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• Migwel
StarCraft: Brood War
• Azhi_Dahaki20
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• TFBlade1202
Other Games
• imaqtpie1096
• Shiphtur458
Upcoming Events
OSC
39m
ByuN vs MaxPax
herO vs Krystianer
Percival vs Shameless
LetaleX vs YoungYakov
Nicoract vs Gerald
GgMaChine vs ArT
CranKy Ducklings
11h 9m
WardiTV Invitational
13h 9m
ByuN vs SHIN
MaxPax vs Solar
Clem vs TBD
herO vs TBD
Lambo vs TBD
Rogue vs TBD
IPSL
18h 9m
TerrOr vs IJ_Terran
rasowy vs Hazorath
BSL
21h 9m
TerrOr vs OyAji
UltrA vs Gosudark
Sparkling Tuna Cup
1d 11h
WardiTV Invitational
1d 13h
IPSL
1d 18h
Art_Of_Turtle vs KameZerg
Radley vs George
BSL
1d 21h
Artosis vs Dewalt
Ret vs Tech
SOOP
2 days
[ Show More ]
WardiTV Weekly
2 days
Monday Night Weeklies
3 days
PiGosaur Cup
4 days
The PondCast
4 days
GSL
5 days
Replay Cast
6 days
KCM Race Survival
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2026-11-12
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
HCC Season 3

Ongoing

Acropolis #5
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 4
International ShieldBattery League
Individual League
BSL Season 23
IPSL Winter 2026-27
Calamity Cup Div. A Season 8
BLAST Rivals Fall 2026
IEM Beijing 2026
PGL Masters Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 5
1win Private Club #2
Thunderpick World Champ. '26
ESL Pro League Season 24
Stake Ranked Episode 4
1win Private Club #1
Logitech G Play Connect 2026
SL StarSeries Fall 2026
FISSURE Playground #3
BLAST Open Fall 2026

Upcoming

YSL S4
Sector 591
SC4ALL II: Brood War
BSL 23: Non-Korean Championship
HSC XXX
Stellar Fest 2: Lunar Cup
StarCraft2 Weekly Open Tournament 2026 Grand Finals
SC4ALL II: StarCraft II
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
RSL Offline Finals
Underdog Cup 2026 Div 2-3
PGL Bucharest 2027
BLAST Bounty Winter 2027
PGL Major Singapore 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 6
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.