• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 05:01
CEST 11:01
KST 18:01
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
[ASL21] Finals Preview: Two Legacies18Code S Season 2 (2026) - RO12 Preview2herO wins GSL Code S Season 1 (2026)5Code S Season 1 (2026) - RO4 & Finals Preview5[ASL21] Ro4 Preview: On Course12
Community News
Crank Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League0Weekly Cups (May 11-17): Classic wins double0Code S Season 1 (2026) - RO8 Results2Weekly Cups (May 4-10): Clem, MaxPax, herO win1Maestros of The Game 2 announcement and schedule !18
StarCraft 2
General
herO wins GSL Code S Season 1 (2026) Code S Season 2 (2026) - RO12 Preview Weekly Cups (May 11-17): Classic wins double Code S Season 1 (2026) - RO4 & Finals Preview Team Liquid Map Contest #22 - The Finalists
Tourneys
Crank Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League GSL Code S Season 2 (2026) GSL Code S Season 1 (2026) Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament Maestros of The Game 2 announcement and schedule !
Strategy
Custom Maps
[D]RTS in all its shapes and glory <3 [A] Nemrods 1/4 players
External Content
Mutation # 527 Hell Train The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 526 Rubber and Glue Mutation # 525 Wheel of Misfortune
Brood War
General
vespene.gg — BW replays in browser 25 Years Since Brood War Patch 1.08 (Spoiler) ASL21 Winner's Interview [ASL21] Finals Preview: Two Legacies UA StarCraft: Mawin (T) vs hanniGan (P) Showmatch
Tourneys
[ASL21] Grand Finals Escore Tournament StarCraft Season 2 [Megathread] Daily Proleagues Small VOD Thread 2.0
Strategy
Any training maps people recommend? Muta micro map competition [G] Hydra ZvZ: An Introduction Fighting Spirit mining rates
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Nintendo Switch Thread Dawn of War IV ZeroSpace Megathread Warcraft III: The Frozen Throne
Dota 2
The Story of Wings Gaming
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Vanilla Mini Mafia Mafia Game Mode Feedback/Ideas TL Mafia Community Thread Five o'clock TL Mafia
Community
General
Russo-Ukrainian War Thread US Politics Mega-thread Trading/Investing Thread European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread YouTube Thread
Fan Clubs
The herO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
[Manga] One Piece Anime Discussion Thread [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread McBoner: A hockey love story TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 Formula 1 Discussion
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
streaming software Strange computer issues (software)
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Esports Organizations: Raisi…
TrAiDoS
Why RTS gamers make better f…
gosubay
ramps on octagon
StaticNine
Funny Nicknames
LUCKY_NOOB
ASL S21 English Commentary…
namkraft
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 1328 users

Starcraft Beards

Blogs > SirJolt
Post a Reply
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4011 Posts
September 05 2010 23:13 GMT
#1
You can tell a lot about how a man plays Starcraft from the state of his facial hair. Generally, the guys you play on Battle.net won’t have particularly formidable facial hair, but let’s say you’re in a tournament, things are getting rough, you need to know as much about your next opponent as possible, without him learning about you.

Using techniques developed by the FBI to help with criminal profiling, you could learn more about their play style than you’d imagine, simply by investigating an opponent’s facial hair.

Classic Zergling Stubble:

It’s nothing fancy, it practically manages itself. While everyone else is sitting around waiting for their beard to grow to an appreciable length, managing everything carefully, there’s a guy out there who shaved at nine o’clock this morning running around with what passes for a bit of a beard by the evening.

&#91;image loading&#93;

This is the six-pool of beards. You’re sitting there, building up your workers, and you’re pretty sure you’ve got things under control, then, just as you scout, bam, there are already zerglings on the way. It’s reasonably elegant, and it’s there sooner than you’d expect.

It’s a panic-beard.


Burrowed Roaches:

There are times when you’re scouting around, and you just cannot for the life of you find a beard. I mean, clearly this guy has something going on in his chin region, but a beard it ain’t. There’s nothing going on you could see without specialised equipment.

&#91;image loading&#93;

Burrowed roaches. I’m telling you man, you see a guy with this chin, that’s what’s up. Think of it in purely literal terms… something horrifying, lurking just beneath the surface, and it’s full of greenish goo. No matter how hard you try to kill it, it’s going to come back later.

Horrifying.

Bristling Defense:

There are always going to be some who go the extra mile when it comes to preening their beard. They keep everything in order, make sure that every single hair is brushed into the right position.

&#91;image loading&#93;

Think about it, a face lined with spines = a base lined with spine crawlers, turrets, or photon cannons. I’m not saying this is something you can 100% rely on all the time, but I am saying that I guarantee it’s something you can rely on every single time. It’s never wrong.

This is exactly the kind of beard a turtle would grow. Or a sea tortoise maybe.

Sauron Zerg:

This one is a bit harder to spot, but one of the big helps is that people who play in a particular style might have more than just a beard to tell you what they’re thinking. In some cases, it’s a question of body language and comportment.

&#91;image loading&#93;

This guy has Sauron Zerg written all over him. I mean, look at how well he’s microing those bees to keep them out of his ears! The man is clearly in control of a vast number of tiny things all at once. There’s also a version that indicates that a player has an affinity for overlords and may be hoping to get a good drop in, but it’s a bit rarer.


+ Show Spoiler +


The overlord beard:

&#91;image loading&#93;



Cheese Beards:

There are a few beards that indicate that your opponent might be up to something a bit cheesier than you’d normally need to prepare for. The most obvious of these is the straight up beard-made-out-of-canned-cheese.

&#91;image loading&#93;

It should be fairly easy to spot. Others tend to centre around the essential deception of the beard itself. In these situations, you’ll need to keep a close eye on just what the beard is trying to say, versus what’s going on in the background. I’ve included a number of examples.

+ Show Spoiler +


&#91;image loading&#93;

And the ever popular:

&#91;image loading&#93;



Honorable Mentions:

+ Show Spoiler +


Fast Robo:

&#91;image loading&#93;

Storm Beard:

So named for its infamously patchy nature and the potentially hit-and-miss quality of the beard depending on the player.

&#91;image loading&#93;

Off Expansion:

You know when you check someone's base, and everything's where it should be, nothing's out of place, then all of a sudden they have expansions in fucking ridiculous places?

&#91;image loading&#93;




****
Moderator@SirJolt
r33k
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Italy3402 Posts
September 05 2010 23:24 GMT
#2
Beards are awesome.
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
September 05 2010 23:29 GMT
#3
I think the hidden expansion is the best one :O They are all great though.
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26782 Posts
September 05 2010 23:38 GMT
#4
On September 06 2010 08:29 Najda wrote:
I think the hidden expansion is the best one :O They are all great though.

I agree heartily with your statement.

SirJolt you always provide amusing blogs.
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
deathgod6
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States5064 Posts
September 05 2010 23:46 GMT
#5
lol great blog.
4.0 GPA = A rank 5.0 GPA = Olympic --------- Bisu, Best, Fantasy. i ♥ oov. They can get in my BoxeR anyday.
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4011 Posts
September 05 2010 23:55 GMT
#6
On September 06 2010 08:38 flamewheel wrote:
SirJolt you always provide amusing blogs.


Thanks F, very much appreciated
Moderator@SirJolt
Adeny
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Norway1233 Posts
September 06 2010 00:06 GMT
#7
You forgot the most important one: The Adeny beard.
endy
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Switzerland8970 Posts
September 06 2010 00:19 GMT
#8
nice blog. and some incredibly funny pictures
ॐ
PH
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States6173 Posts
September 06 2010 00:52 GMT
#9
amazing. 5/5.
Hello
Kinky
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States4126 Posts
September 06 2010 01:09 GMT
#10
On September 06 2010 09:06 Adeny wrote:
You forgot the most important one: The Adeny beard.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYi24D9lHqc

That's a pretty sick beard
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4011 Posts
September 06 2010 01:55 GMT
#11
That beard is among the most impressive things I've ever seen :D
Moderator@SirJolt
Defeat
Profile Joined March 2010
United States476 Posts
September 06 2010 03:58 GMT
#12
Nice blog sir :}>
"the metagame has really evolved to the point where the best chance to win the metagame is to game the metagame" -Bags
OpticalShot
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Canada6330 Posts
September 06 2010 04:06 GMT
#13
Omg hidden expo lolol
[TLMS] REBOOT
hp.Shell
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States2527 Posts
September 06 2010 04:26 GMT
#14
[image loading]
Please PM me with any songs you like that you think I haven't heard before!
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4011 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-09-07 14:33:15
September 07 2010 14:32 GMT
#15
I saw a couple of really amazing moustaches/beards like the above, but couldn't link them to StarCraft in any way, and so had to sideline them. It felt bad to do so

Truly they are majestic beasts.
Moderator@SirJolt
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 1h 59m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
Nina 167
StarCraft: Brood War
Hyuk 1311
Killer 1126
firebathero 482
Larva 349
Hm[arnc] 160
Mind 136
actioN 102
Aegong 81
Sharp 47
Shinee 27
[ Show more ]
EffOrt 27
sorry 12
IntoTheRainbow 10
ajuk12(nOOB) 6
Dota 2
NeuroSwarm142
Counter-Strike
olofmeister1613
shoxiejesuss569
Other Games
ceh9672
crisheroes141
RuFF_SC240
Organizations
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
[ Show 11 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• LUISG 25
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
Upcoming Events
Universe Titan Cup
1h 59m
Rogue vs Percival
Wardi Open
2h 59m
Monday Night Weeklies
6h 59m
Replay Cast
14h 59m
Kung Fu Cup
1d 1h
GSL
2 days
herO vs Classic
Cure vs Clem
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
2 days
Replay Cast
2 days
GSL
3 days
Maru vs SHIN
Zoun vs Rogue
WardiTV Spring Champion…
3 days
SKillous vs Strange
Lambo vs Strange
Ryung vs Strange
Lambo vs Ryung
Ryung vs SKillous
Lambo vs SKillous
[ Show More ]
Replay Cast
3 days
Maestros of the Game
4 days
Replay Cast
4 days
RSL Revival
4 days
Lambo vs SHIN
Solar vs Rogue
herO vs Clem
IPSL
5 days
ZZZero vs WorsT
Julia vs eOnzErG
Replay Cast
5 days
RSL Revival
5 days
IPSL
6 days
Dragon vs Artosis
dxtr13 vs Hawk
BSL
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

ASL Season 21
2026 GSL S1
Heroes Pulsing #1

Ongoing

2026 KK StarCraft Pro League
BSL Season 22
IPSL Spring 2026
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 2
KK 2v2 League Season 1
YSL S3
Acropolis #4
CSCL: Masked Kings S4
SCTL 2026 Spring
WardiTV Spring 2026
2026 GSL S2
RSL Revival: Season 5
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
IEM Rio 2026
PGL Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 1
BLAST Open Spring 2026
ESL Pro League S23 Finals

Upcoming

Escore Tournament S2: King of Kings
BSL 22 Non-Korean Championship
CSLAN 4
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
HSC XXIX
uThermal 2v2 2026 Main Event
Maestros of the Game 2
Bounty Cup 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer Qual
Stake Ranked Episode 3
XSE Pro League 2026
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.