Apathy has taken a hold. I'm spiraling in that awkward point in life where one cannot decide to do professionally. I've served for 5 years, done construction for 2, and for lack of a better choice, I've decided to go into some kind of apprenticeship. I've taken a few steps toward it but I'm holding back. How do you choose something so important like this? I'm fucking 24 and although I know I'm young, there are people who are fucking 19 and they are 2 years through a degree and have their life laid out.
Don't get me wrong, I would never enjoy laying out the rest of my life, but why for fucks sake can I not choose a direction and GO! Wasting time doing menial bullshit. Serving is pretty good money at times but it accomplishes NOTHING and I assumed this would be my last summer doing it. SUPPLES! You're fired. Apparently I had become so apathetic, even my boss and coworkers had noticed. My customers always left happy with the service but I still managed to piss off the management. I need to find a direction, and I was wondering how the lovely people of TL found theirs?
I'm just going to enter college, so I don't know much about this, but have you considering going to a trade school? There have been threads like yours before with people in similar situations, and thats what many people recommended.
If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
Do you qualify for the GI bill for college? If so why not give college a go? Whether its community college or a four year college it does not hurt to take a bunch of classes and see if it sparks any interest. You never know and it shouldn't hurt you as you currently seem clueless about what you want to do in life. Dont let your age deter you from college. With a college degree required for many jobs nowadays, you should consider attending. College will take time and effort but it can allow you to explore many subjects and see if any of it is for you. Good luck.
If anyone knew the answer to the question "how am I supposed to know what I should do with my life?" or "I have so many interests, I dont know what to choose. pls help!"..fuck man. Billionaire.
No one can tell you what you should do. It's your own fucking life and most of us had the same problem. If you don' start talking to people about what they do for a living and why, visit classes in college or just fucking read a book about what MIGHT interest you then I don' really know what kind of advice you expect? Someone saying "dude, artificial intelligence man. Go find out where you can study this, it's teh shit!" ?
Seriously, you need to get up your ass and fight it out for yourself. A good friend of mine is in the same situation and it pains me to see someone like him, smart, funny and without a doubt a serious benefit for any company wasting his time in some grocery store (he is 25 by now).
Just get your shit together man. You don't need us telling you that this is okay, normal and whatever. You are obviously looking for motivation. Get a girlfriend, have someone you would want to impress, have a baby, etc, just have someone that you will be willing to work hard for.
The reality is that few people get into a career that they love. The idea that there is a perfect job for everyone is bullshit. Sometimes you just have to tough it out, either go back to school or get another menial job.
Perhaps you could visit a job fair and just talk with people from all sorts of branches. Hopefully you'll find something that sparks your interest/enthusiasm and you can either start and work your way up through on the job learning and some courses or you can enroll somewhere to work towards your new found goal.
When I started working I also didn't have a clue. I just started somewhere that seemed ok (didn't have a degree so the pay was not stellar but a good working mind and a will to make something of it) and gradually took on new tasks and climbing the ladder. Took me a few years before I was running the department and moved on for a new challenge.
In short: - pick something you think you could like - pick something with growth perspective - if you have the time do some courses on the side - if you don't like it go search for something new but don't stay to short on several consecutive jobs as it will look bad on your CV.
That's the best I can do without sending you to college where you probably will change your major 3 times anyway. I think perhaps 30% of my high school class stayed with it's first major and of them perhaps 30% actually took a job somewhat related to that major.
don't feel bad. I'm 29 and I haven't my life laid out for me. I finished my studies when I was 28 (that must be hard to believe for an American) and those studies don't even qualify me for a job since my major was comparative literature. Now I'm making money as a substitute teacher. If everything works out I'll get a permanent job at a school, but if it doesn't I'll have to start from scratch. Have faith, I have.
From personal experience, I can tell you that working shitty, menial jobs is really helpful in finding out stuff about oneself. After (high)school, I started working various low-paid jobs like construction and service work.. it went on until I was 24 or something, when I realised how much I loathed this type of work, and it helped me get back to studying.
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
In the end it comes down to confidence , the lack of.I think it's safe to say a fair chunk of people on these forums suffer from it.
Even so , having some dead end job is better than having no job , nothing sucks the life out of you more than being unemployed.
The sad thing is some people don't get the basics.One of my buddies on West did some computing degree and has been unemployed since he finished his studies about 9 months back.He sent in his resume to IBM and they gave him a call back , but he told them to call him back as he was eating his dinner.They didn't call him back.Some people are idiots i swear , be presentable and have a well laid out resume with no spelling errors and no stupid email addresses and you are ahead of 70% of the people out there nowdays.
First I'd like to express my sympathies. This is a very hard state to be in. Unfortunately everyone is different and what works on some may not work for you. Furthermore, the strange and standardized world we live in really punishes creativity and innovation outside of the already established life styles (could I make a living selling my philosophical ideas at 50 bucks a pop?). If it makes you feel better, this feeling that you're struggling with is extremely common.
When I was young, I was really really high on life, and as a result I had no ambition (it's my belief that those who are happy and satisfied lack ambition). I had no job and I dropped out of high school, etc etc. Finally, when the mediocrity of this horrible existence we all share began bearing down on me, I decided a job was in order. Shitty jobs abound, I experimented. When I began with more serious jobs that required investment, I figured out that I'm capable of great preparation. Because most non-degree jobs are boring (or rare) I decided school was the best option.
So here are a few things. Experiment with jobs you might be interested in. If you don't like any of these, go to school and focus only on classes that you may like. My first semester, for example, I took biology because it sounded interesting to me. That's all it took for me to 'plan out' my future and begin earning a degree in biology.
Or, if that's just more of the same, hopefully this next comment isn't offensive and instead helpful. Life isn't meaningful. You live. You die. The end never occurs because nothing worth note ever started on this small and distant planet. If you never find a dream job, that's okay. For many people, I think it's find to find something that you're okay with. For example, one of the jobs I had before I went to school was an electrician's apprentice. I found that that job wasn't intelligent enough for me, but that it would have worked fine if I was a journeyman or something.
The reality is that few people get into a career that they love.
too true as is the idea that you can 'be anything you want to be' - 95% of those kids doing TV and media classes never get a related job at the end of them ; what a tragedy!
Think carefully before you choose your courses , choose something in high demand.
I never could figure out what I would love to do for a job, so I just stopped thinking about it. I instead focused on the rest of my life. I made my primary goal being happy and not letting anything compromise that goal. I guess it wasn't so much that I found my direction. I think I focused on the part of my life where I had a direction.
I am going on my 12th year of being in the work force, doing 3 completely different types of jobs over that course. The people I have met at work have made an impact on my life but the jobs themselves haven't really defined my life. They are just means to provide for my needs.
That was to answer your question, I think you got some good advice in the rest of the thread. I will just reinforce that you have to figure it out for yourself, and you will. Just try to keep your spirits up while you do
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
This is incredibly true. I'm always jealous of people having something better than me, whether it's a better social life or just happier in general. Remember, these people are probably jealous of you for something too. In the end, it all balances out.
As for the job, just pick something you might like and go with it. Don't feel like you have to pick something. It's alot easier to decide you hate your job when you're 25 than when you're 30 and about to get married. And even at 30, it's much easier to change your job than when you're 40 and the kids are depending on you for food.
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
I wonder how many TLers are college dropouts!
I want to go back to college but I will do it entirely differently. The number one priority in my life is to FIND my number one priority in life. Many people get lured into the false sense of comfort of a `secure reliable job` but that shit is soul draining. I really don`t want to be 40 years old and ask myself, `damn, what could I have done instead of this bullshit?" There are a few people out there who when they go to work are bubbling with joy. I wanna find that something that brings out that sense of unbridled happiness and childlike wonder in me. When I go back to school it will be more to explore what I REALLY to do in this life rather than to simply do courses. Like I will actively go around and probe all my professors for answers, volunteer at different labs, do undergraduate research, ask my counsellor for help, co-op opportunities and so on and so forth.
Other than that, you also just need to rack up as many life lessons as you can to get a better understanding of who you are and what you want. You just need to actively seek novelty and challenge, every single day.
Also, look for people who are passionate and are in love with their jobs. Ask them why. Figure out what makes them tick. Try to put yourself in their shoes and see if you have a strong emotion response mentally doing what they do. Then research it, try it out.
This is the "plight" of our generation. It is the quarter life crisis.
Yeah, all I ever think about is that I know I need to go back to college, problem is I have NO CLUE what I'd want to go for. That's the reason I dropped out in the first place... not lack of funds, my grades were fine, I was motivated ok; I just didn't care at all for what I was there for.
I had always thought to myself "I'll spend a couple years working and figure out what I really want to do", but in all honesty, that hasn't happened yet. Actually, I fear I may never figure out what I want to do in life, or I may figure it out really late in the game.
On June 26 2010 20:19 EvilTeletubby wrote: Oh god, what're you doing up so late... or early?
I needed to take a break from all the goings on around here lately so I stopped by TL to stare at your ass for a bit, what else would I be doing at this hour?
On June 26 2010 20:19 EvilTeletubby wrote: Oh god, what're you doing up so late... or early?
I needed to take a break from all the goings on around here lately so I stopped by TL to stare at your ass for a bit, what else would I be doing at this hour?
Since we're at this juncture already... Maybe ET can go back to college, find his true calling and become a professor. Then you can probe him for answers.
Is finding the perfect job really that important? I have an ok job with it i can pay my rent and eat what i want and do the things i want as long as i plan it well and it's not too crazy.
I am mostly content, not because of my job but because i can do the things i enjoy after work like playing Sc2 beta or going out.
What i'm trying to say is maybe you should focus about what would make you happy in life and earn enough with whatever job you find to do it. Of course it's only my opinion, some people find joy in their job.
On June 26 2010 17:59 FuDDx wrote: Balloons are fun
Netflix search Twisted a balloonocumentry..or something like that.
I laughed, I remember reading your blog a few times hahaha. Very cool stuff. I don't know where I'm headed, but I definitely appreciate all the honest posts. I actually didn't really expect much response at all, and yet everyone has a little something useful to say. Ty kindly all.
"One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed."
i would trade my handsomeness for his smart look every time. hard labor works suck ball with money you can have everything even friend and love.
I always found that asking "what do I want to do" was one of the most useless questions one could ask. The far better questions is what do you not want to do. I think you have a fairly good idea about what you don't want to do haha (as do most people I find). Eliminate the waste, and look at what options are left on the table. If you have a natural affinity towards one particular area then that's the best bet imo.
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
hmm, your friend sounds like me. i got into med school (w00t) but am depressed and lonely and socially awkward. i guess it's the price you pay.
On June 26 2010 18:05 meathook wrote: From personal experience, I can tell you that working shitty, menial jobs is really helpful in finding out stuff about oneself. After (high)school, I started working various low-paid jobs like construction and service work.. it went on until I was 24 or something, when I realised how much I loathed this type of work, and it helped me get back to studying.
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
What the hell...
why do you say what the hell.
it is very common. i'm basically like that. what are you saying, that i don't deserve a break?
sure, i am socially repressed and depressed now, but when i'm done and have a career and all that stuff, i think having a good paycheck and going out more often, i'll be able to catch back up on the socializing pretty quickly.
my plan; graduate in 2 years (I'm 23 and should have graduated atleast a year ago soo don't feel too bad); apply to be DEO in military; serve 4 years; apply to be intelligence officer > military strategist / national defense work.
if I don't fuck up in the military and ruin my credibility then I will run for political office with all the baller contacts i will undoubtedly make. + 55k a year starting with many-a-raises will make me rich as fuck in my mind.
Came back after a year break, about to drop out again, same reason as ETT.
What I realized is that most of the people who complain that they don't know what they want to do haven't actually tried that many things. It's like saying "I CAN'T DECIDE WHICH ICECREAM FLAVOR I LIKE THE MOST" when you've only tried the one that was the safest choice and never had the guts to try the ones you had no idea what they would taste like.
Go work, any job, any workshop, anything that you can try. Even the jobs you may call shitty and useless will allow you to learn something about yourself and the world.
I got a job at a telecomunications company, giving people phone information. I even surprised myself at how much I grew from that "shitty, one-dimensional job."
I started to read books again, I do stuff with plants, I plan to further explore my guitar skills, I have a contact that'll hook me up with a piano teacher. I have many other things in the backburner of my mind and I'll try hard to put their status to 'ACTIVE' instead of 'ON HOLD FOR UNDEFINED AMOUNT OF TIME'.
I'm 29 and just graduated from college 3 months ago. I've not found a job, although I've sent countless of companies my resume. I'm quite experienced, having worked in a call center for 5 years, and being a team supervisor in 4 of those.
I told myself 2 years ago that I'm going back to school to get a career change (I've come to loathe the call center life). But here I am, fresh from college and no company in Singapore or Canada would even send me a "thank you" email for sending my resume.
Now, I'm thinking of just going back to the friggin' call center just so my parents (yes, I still live with my parents) don't see me lounging around here at home and just play and watch SCBW all day. (and just now, South Korea lost to Uruguay in the Ro16.. drat..)
So there, I guess I'm just like you, dude Pathology. I guess I'll just down what's left of my dad's bottle of 40% Jack Daniels.
Here's to all of us who are just, uhm, lost.. And that we may hopefully find what we actually want in life, and sooner, rather than later.
On June 26 2010 20:15 EvilTeletubby wrote: @Warrior Madness
Yeah, all I ever think about is that I know I need to go back to college, problem is I have NO CLUE what I'd want to go for. That's the reason I dropped out in the first place... not lack of funds, my grades were fine, I was motivated ok; I just didn't care at all for what I was there for.
I had always thought to myself "I'll spend a couple years working and figure out what I really want to do", but in all honesty, that hasn't happened yet. Actually, I fear I may never figure out what I want to do in life, or I may figure it out really late in the game.
@Biscuittt - Hey fuckface! Post more!!
Pretty much the best you can do when you don't have direction is to either work a job that improves the value of your labor dramatically (AKA doctor/lawyer/financial analyst), or work a job that gives you lots of exposure to different fields, thereby providing the most opportunities for you to run into something that catches your fancy.
Also A great point its not what you know its who you know.As I get older and have had many jobs (thanks ice carving) where I get to schmooze with some more wealthy clients etc.I am flabbergasted by how many people get great jobs because they know someone or they are family with so and so when There are plenty of experienced and knowledgeable people trying for the job but Joe blow gets it with no experience and all the pay because hes boofing some guys sister.Pisses me off. So I make it a point to dress well,always smile and introduce myself and try to be as accommodation as I can.One day one of these rich guys are going to want to give me free money really one day!!!
On June 27 2010 02:38 FuDDx wrote: Also A great point its not what you know its who you know.As I get older and have had many jobs (thanks ice carving) where I get to schmooze with some more wealthy clients etc.I am flabbergasted by how many people get great jobs because they know someone or they are family with so and so when There are plenty of experienced and knowledgeable people trying for the job but Joe blow gets it with no experience and all the pay because hes boofing some guys sister.Pisses me off. So I make it a point to dress well,always smile and introduce myself and try to be as accommodation as I can.One day one of these rich guys are going to want to give me free money really one day!!!
So because others are living like weasels, you want to put on a weasel suit too? :-|. There are more worthwhile things in life than just making money in an easy way....
I just finished college, have a little bit of a direction, but no idea if I will like it or not. Don't think those that attend college have their life laid out. About halfway through almost everyone feels as if their life is a big mystery. Graduating is terrifying for most since we have no idea what to do afterwords.
The best we can do is pick something and go for it. Life is an adventure, if it doesn't suit you just find something new. Don't trick yourself into thinking you will find what 'you're meant to do' at a young age; it takes many people years. Just don't get stuck in something you hate.
On June 27 2010 02:38 FuDDx wrote: Also A great point its not what you know its who you know.As I get older and have had many jobs (thanks ice carving) where I get to schmooze with some more wealthy clients etc.I am flabbergasted by how many people get great jobs because they know someone or they are family with so and so when There are plenty of experienced and knowledgeable people trying for the job but Joe blow gets it with no experience and all the pay because hes boofing some guys sister.Pisses me off. So I make it a point to dress well,always smile and introduce myself and try to be as accommodation as I can.One day one of these rich guys are going to want to give me free money really one day!!!
So because others are living like weasels, you want to put on a weasel suit too? :-|. There are more worthwhile things in life than just making money in an easy way....
So you saying that dressing nice and smiling is being a weasel? I do not follow your lack of logic,sorry.I do balloons and ice carving, booth of witch I love, where I deal with people like I described before. I enjoy my job I do not enjoy dealing with those assholes but I must.And since my business would not be if not for them I must keep them happy one way is to be nice polite and try to do all I can to provide a quality service.I may not like dealing with weasels but they do pay me money at something I love to do sooo......umm no offense but piss off.
On June 27 2010 02:38 FuDDx wrote: Also A great point its not what you know its who you know.As I get older and have had many jobs (thanks ice carving) where I get to schmooze with some more wealthy clients etc.I am flabbergasted by how many people get great jobs because they know someone or they are family with so and so when There are plenty of experienced and knowledgeable people trying for the job but Joe blow gets it with no experience and all the pay because hes boofing some guys sister.Pisses me off. So I make it a point to dress well,always smile and introduce myself and try to be as accommodation as I can.One day one of these rich guys are going to want to give me free money really one day!!!
So because others are living like weasels, you want to put on a weasel suit too? :-|. There are more worthwhile things in life than just making money in an easy way....
So you saying that dressing nice and smiling is being a weasel? I do not follow your lack of logic,sorry.I do balloons and ice carving, booth of witch I love, where I deal with people like I described before. I enjoy my job I do not enjoy dealing with those assholes but I must.And since my business would not be if not for them I must keep them happy one way is to be nice polite and try to do all I can to provide a quality service.I may not like dealing with weasels but they do pay me money at something I love to do sooo......umm no offense but piss off.
Well put. To be honest, I can't find one thing wrong with doing what it is you are passionate about, regardless of who you have to put up with. Even if you have to leave a good impression, and it takes some extra work to keep them happy, there's no harm there. I'll have to do the same when I drag my own ass out of school to work in Child Protective Services, I'll still have to be very accommodating to some pretty big scumbags, but that comes with the job. It took me a long time to figure out what to try, but I eventually settled - very late. I could have been done last year, but I'll be finishing up in two more now. Still, I don't regret taking my time one bit. The OP just needs to rule out the things he doesn't want to do, and look at the remaining options. Find something you will find rewarding, and you won't regret it.
I behave pretty much the same way fuddx. I treat all my customers really well and usually pretty honest with them. If they ask me how a meal is and its shitty, I tell them. One time thats gotten me in trouble, the other 9 times out of ten the customer appreciates it and says so. More then a 4 major jobs fo rme as well as small side jobs have been from bs'ing with family members of this local greek mafia. I don't think they are REALLY the mafia, they just seem that way. Regardless being friendly and approachable goes a long way. Storkhwaiting's point barely seemed related to fuddx's post so I'm gonna go ahead and assume neither of us are wieselsl, but that's just an imo.
On June 27 2010 03:01 CheAse wrote: Get out of bed so we can go hand our resumes into McDonalds.
edit: get of bed, instead of bad.
On the one hand I feel like like a fail of a human being for hearing there today something along lines of "work you were doing wasn't as good as we expected". Omg, even fast food doesn't want me, how bad is that. It was so weird to randomly meet my boss when coming home later, talk with her friendly and learn that she lives few hundreds meters away from me.
On the other hand, it's actually good that many people think about working there so badly because companies like MD have to offer more to people to encourage them about asking for job. I and many people I heard to talk about this, consider my pay and some things that come with it quite good for what is needed from us, when compared to many other options. So good I'm thinking about asking if it's possible to try my luck in another MD restaurant - I can terminate my contract any time and start working somewhere else in 2 weeks anyways!
It's really soothing to read that there are many people, even quite older than me (I'm 22) that have similar situation in their lives. I've stopped studying after less than 2 months as I was more than sure that Environmental Engineering I blogged about not only wasn't my thing but I also simply wasn't capable of properly stydying it without taking care of my mental state and my highschool material. I don't want to even try to get somewhere before my mind is free of past. I have 2 more years, which means 2 more chances to pass only those maturity exams (equivalent of SATs?; or pass them better than I did 3 years ago) that I will need to get and study something I would like do in my future. After that I will have to pass all of them again. I don't think that considering chemistry, which I used to be at least good at, only because I used to be so bored without internet to imagine particles colliding or because of hope to work in fireworks industry is good enough. I need something more solid and I don't see it coming now, during my no life cycles between days I work (and it's not even a full tim job but 3/4 part-time job) - I don't feel capable of studying in my state now
It's at least better than it used to be last autumn/winter. I've felt a bit like burden at TL meeting in Freiburg, I knew I would not accomplish much when I was coming there. Well seeing Tlneters including staff members live is a big accomplishment though :D
On June 27 2010 09:06 beetlelisk wrote: I've stopped studying after less than 2 months as I was more than sure that Environmental Engineering I blogged about not only wasn't my thing but I also simply wasn't capable of properly stydying it without taking care of my mental state and my highschool material.
Not to mention, the whole not-wearing-pants thing.
On June 27 2010 09:06 beetlelisk wrote: I've stopped studying after less than 2 months as I was more than sure that Environmental Engineering I blogged about not only wasn't my thing but I also simply wasn't capable of properly stydying it without taking care of my mental state and my highschool material.
Not to mention, the whole not-wearing-pants thing.
Alright I'm reading this book on sports psychology and I'm on a particularly illuminating chapter on "vision integrity".
We make thousands of decisions on a day to day basis usually using a "vision" as our guidepost for directing those decisions and actions. Your vision is what you imagine your life to be and how you'll live it. Your vision are the three most important aspects of your life that you just FEEL in your bones that you must prioritize.
Vincent Lombardi's top three were: 1) God 2) Family 3) Greenbay packers. A lot of athletes actually have long term goals and short term goals that simply don't align with their own personal vision. This causes a lot of resentment even if they're paid athletes.
So how do you even figure out what your top three priorities are? Well, in the book is a deceivingly simple but brilliant exercise.
1) Make a list of activities you KNOW you're good at. 2) Of all the activities you're good at, make a note of what you actually enjoy doing. 3) Take it a step further by then selecting the activites you REALLY enjoy doing. 4) And once you have a new list, take it even a step further by choosing the activities you REALLY REALLY enjoy doing.
And also, giving each activity a rating from 0-10 is helpful. I have a few moments and memories that I can use as a gauge to see just how much I like each thing I'm good at. i.e. Having a memorable night out with my closest friends is a solid 10, watching an incredible "life altering" movie is a 10 for me, etc. So if I have an equal amount of fun simply doing any of the activities I'm good at, as I do with my other 10s then I should definitely focus on those activities.
But yeah, I know it's a really simple exercise, but I actually took 15 minutes to really think about this. I didn't have that much on my list of things I'm good at. But it was pretty eye opening for me, because I learned something about myself I didn't know before hand and I can actually see a few possible career paths that make me go, "woah, I could actually do that."
^ that's not a ground shaking advice imo but what's more important I don't think it applies to younger people like me because I don't have much to choose from, I still need to try more new things or jobs. I know this most probably focuses on activities done in a free time but majority of them isn't by their nature creative enough to forge (long time) jobs using them.
After one more talk it appears I'm not losing my current job, I just need to put little more into it and completely stop being late
The point in life is to find what you don't like about yourself and continually try to improve it. First off, you need to give yourself a goal, think what about yourself is preventing you from reaching that goal. Then work towards fixing your weaknesses.
I just finished my EE degree with first class honors (80+). In first yaer, I had 61 average cuz I just fucked around. In 2nd year I had 70 cuz I started to care a bit. Then in third year, I told myself I really really want to get first class honors. It meant a lot to me to get that prestige. So I found that I was playing too many games. Cut it out. Eating in the cafe for like 2 hours talking to friends. Cut it to 1 hour. Wasting time between classes. Went to the library. Then my grades started to improve. In 3rd year I got my 80 average and I felt good. It's these little goals...it builds confidence and it helps you keep moving forward.
Then I decided I wanted to go into consulting instead of a technical job. I found this out when I did my internship at AMD/ATI (i thought it was mindnumbingly boring) . For anyone who doesnt know, consulting is VERY difficult to get into . They only take the cream of the crop. It is tough shit. I started to improve my communication skills the best I could. I tried to gain experience in the area by doing two graduating projects instead of the regular one. I spent $1500 out of my own pocket to learn SAP, a tool that IT consultants use a lot. I took a crappy summer job just to get closer to Deloitte. Now, I just finished my second interview with Accenture, waiting to hear the news. If I pass this, I have one more. If I don't get it, I'm still enrolled in a business masters in UT, so I have options.
You have plenty of time in your life. Take on small goals. One step at a time. Then itll help you build confidence.
On June 27 2010 03:53 Hectic wrote: Focus on what you are good at, rather than what you think you want to do.
This guy exactly right.
One of the Best posts I have seen in months on TL.
Disagree.
Focus on what you want to do (but be realistic) and ask yourself, why am I not like that? Then improve yourself until you are.
I kinda combine both. I didn't know what I was going to study in University so I chose the one that I had the best grades in - Math. I originally wanted to do some sort of Engineering but after doing some hands-on project in Physics class and pretty much relying on my dad to help me with most of it I realize I didn't have that kind of engineering mindset to succeed in that field.
I succumbed to gaming in high school, played a lot of Lineage 2 - I'd wake up 5 in the morning before school starts to grind a couple hours...thats when my parents would be sleeping so they wouldn't notice. Imagine if I had used that time to study or work out or even just stay sleeping...hindsight is always 20/20.
Luckily I made a new group of friends during my senior year and they all had their lives straightened out (so I think). I think to be successful its beneficial to be surrounded with successful people. Before meeting them I was only planning on going to some second rate school in some second rate program then see where I was going to go from there. All my friends went to Waterloo so I didn't want to come off as an outcast not going there so I had to work harder to get there.
I ain't the sharpest tool by any means, just getting by in my courses...but I'm also one of those people who are very envious of others. I always focus on the things I don't have and I tend to forget about all the things I already have. I look at the people around me and one by one they're climbing the corporate ladder (or corporate slavery if you will) and I'm still progressing rather slowly. I have too much pride and I care too much about what people think of me so thats why I want to improve myself.
I've kind of come to the realization that I probably won't work my dream job and whatever I do is probably going to be somewhat boring but sometimes its about putting food on the table ... and I want really nice food on my table.
On June 27 2010 03:53 Hectic wrote: Focus on what you are good at, rather than what you think you want to do.
This guy exactly right.
One of the Best posts I have seen in months on TL.
Disagree.
Focus on what you want to do (but be realistic) and ask yourself, why am I not like that? Then improve yourself until you are.
I've kind of come to the realization that I probably won't work my dream job and whatever I do is probably going to be somewhat boring but sometimes its about putting food on the table ... and I want really nice food on my table.
Dude. If you think like a failure, you will be a failure. Sounds cheesy, over-used etc etc. Sure. But its the truth. Stop thinking like that. Build your confidence one step at a time. Unless you are mentally retarded or something, you can probably go achieve your dream. Just take it one step at a time. You'll see yourself getting closer and then you'll start sprinting at it.
I'm a college graduate and all I really want to do in life is browse TL and play SC 2 or SC: BW via means of fun. well the occasional go out for dinner/movie is nice with a hint of going to the beach..
But in order for me to do this kinda of stuff I really need to sacrifice stuff, so I've decided to get two jobs at once (which is really hard considering the fact that in Manila, you can't land two jobs at once except create a business of your own).
Man trying to look for a purpose is pretty hard IMHO, but just look deeply or meditate for a little while to get your shit going. Maybe afterwards, try going for a discipline like MMA or a boot camp to get self discipline so you wouldn't be de-focused.
My best suggestion (barring money problems) would be college. Going to college will give you a couple years just to cover the GE's and really find out what you want to do.
Of course, this presents the problem of finding out what you actually want to do. So how do you find that out?
This is how I found out what I wanted to do. Think about your life. Think about what you've been involved with since you were younger (or are very involved with now). Think about you now, and you in 10 years. What are the things that you still want to be doing? What are the things that you can't ever imagine giving up in your life? What are the things you never get tired of?
This is how I found my answer, and it ended up being music. I've been in choir since 6th grade, and looking at my future and when I graduate, I could just never see myself not involved with a choir - music is something that I've always loved, that I would be incredibly sad to not have in my life, and something that I never get tired of, so that's why I decided to be a music major. Now I'm getting my undergrad degree in Theory/Composition and I'm planning to go to graduate school in that field + directing/conducting.
Don't think about what you want to do as a job - think about what you love to do in life the most.
EPT
