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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On May 06 2013 05:41 W2 wrote: On that same note, what are some ways to get a girl to put away their phone? Like in a jokingly/playful sort of way sex
or text her "put away ur phone bro"
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On May 06 2013 08:35 Fuchsteufelswild wrote: So 1) Any particular thoughts or comments on this? and 2) I've read a lot of reviews about sites with MANY men and some women here and there typing how there really seem to be many "fake profiles".
Never send a wink/kiss, they aren't effective at all. Girls on dating sites get a ridiculous amount of messages so a wink means nothing. Some message sites do have an auto response set up to winks however, so it's possible that is what you received back. No, the admins did not view your profiles and realize you were compatible and block you two from communicating.
Dating sites are often just a numbers game. Obviously there are ways to increase your odds, but you really want to send out as many messages (and please don't just copy paste messages) to a plethora of girls, don't focus on just one. Pay sites will have less fake accounts, but they are usually pretty easy to spot regardless. If you're curious, just do a search for the profile pic on google images.
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On May 06 2013 09:22 CatNzHat wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 05:41 W2 wrote: On that same note, what are some ways to get a girl to put away their phone? Like in a jokingly/playful sort of way sex or text her "put away ur phone bro" Ask her what she's doing with it lol. No harm in seeming interested about her life.
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On May 06 2013 06:25 rezoacken wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 05:41 W2 wrote: On that same note, what are some ways to get a girl to put away their phone? Like in a jokingly/playful sort of way You mean during a date ? Asking someone to stop doing something annoying has to come by their own realization that it's annoying which isn't an emotion that goes very well with laughter. But without being rude just say you'd like it if she'd stop using her phone. Most of the time she'll be okay with it if she's a nice enough person. If she starts to be really bitchy ("Don't tell me what to do") and doesn't stop, just leave the date, she sucks. Trust me, being able to walk away will give you a lot more confidence in the end than accepting to be disrespected. In the end anyway its the same as saying she's disrespectful (with reason) so you will have to stand your ground and resume conversation to kill the awkwardness that may come out of it. You can also ask if she is waiting for something really important, it happens (family member in hospital, etc), but the last evening of her bff can wait. By the way, I wouldn't freak out for one or two checks during a date, as long as she doesn't start texting, looking facebook, and answering calls that's okay with me. Leaving the date is actually an incredibly powerful thing to do. If a girl is checking her phone a lot, and making a few jokes about it doesn't get her to stop, just tell her you have to take off (no need for a detailed explanation, I would actually refuse to give any more details) and go do something else. Very few guys have the balls to do this. It's a pretty clear message that you don't take crap and that you don't care that much whether she's into you or not. In other words, it shows you're confident. I will guarantee that almost any girl you do this too will follow up and try to reconnect with you -- and be a lot more interested the next time you see her.
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On May 06 2013 05:38 W2 wrote:Show nested quote +On May 05 2013 16:37 Orcasgt24 wrote:On May 03 2013 06:41 Orcasgt24 wrote:On May 03 2013 06:26 white_horse wrote:On May 03 2013 06:18 sunprince wrote:On May 03 2013 06:02 Orcasgt24 wrote:On April 24 2013 08:09 Orcasgt24 wrote: I have a date tonight with a new girl from work. She moved to this city like 2 weeks ago. Very excited. Figured I'd post how it went for the hell of it. She spent most of the time either texting or talking to her friend from the city she moved from. Then quickly asked for the bill when the server came by. Total waste of both of our time. Obviously no second date coming lol. Sounds like you bored her. Consider telling a girl to put her phone away the next time this happens to you on a date, and walking out otherwise. Completely agree. It's not ok to even look at your phone once or twice during a date just because it's "only once or twice". Your attention should be 100% towards the other person, not 99% or 98%. If you're guilty of looking at your phone during a date a few times, good to cut the habit now, else you want to lose points from the other. I know I bored her. I tried to carry a conversation (my single worst trait by the way) but responces were like dead ends. She left it practiclly impossble to continue on any one subject and eventually I basiclly gave up. I'm also 95% sure she agreed to go out with me because shes too nice to say no. Food was good at least! So this same girl has been chatting with me during her breaks and the odd text conversation. Like half of what she talks about is how she's hung out with a bunch of guys who shes ended up thinking are douche-bags. To me this comes across as an extremely polar sign. I just cannot figure out if its the I'm a douche-bag side or the not so subtle hint to ask her out again. Given how poorly the first date went I cannot see it being the wanting a second one(maybe she feels bad?) I don't know what to think or do here. I'm leaning on the side of fuck it and just ask her out again. Worst she can say is no right... I recommend keep texting/chatting and build some more rapport before you ask her out again. If you do insist on a second date, maybe something fun that keeps you both on your feet.
Good advice. Wish I followed it >_< Asked her out to come shopping and for dinner after. I got a maybe.
Everything is clear as mud with this chick. Frustrating yet kinda exciting at the same time
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On May 06 2013 09:12 FeUerFlieGe wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 08:08 HardlyNever wrote:On May 06 2013 04:44 sambo400 wrote:On May 06 2013 04:26 HardlyNever wrote: Going to ask this girl I work with on a lunch "date" (although I don't really consider it a date) this week. Ostensibly we have a lot in common and she seems to be giving me signals (but she could just be being nice).
Will update later this week. I can never tell the difference Yeah she has one of those bubbly/cute personalities that I generally find attractive, but it makes it impossible to differentiate her being especially into you or just being her standard emphatic self. She is one of those people that most things she says and even writes has exclamation points at the end. I guess I'll know by the end of the week. Just assume she's into you. It gives you a little confidence boost.
To elaborate on this, there are four possible outcomes depending on whether you assume she's into you:
-You assume she's into you, she's actually into you: everything works out. -You assume she's into you, she's not into you: you don't lose anything anyways. -You assume she's not into you, she's actually into you: you potentially waste the opportunity. -You assume she's not into you, she's not into you: you don't lose anything.
So regardless, you might as well assume she's into you because it costs you nothing when you're wrong and benefits you when you're right.
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On May 06 2013 09:10 Zooper31 wrote: Met new girl, invited her over after I explained how awesome I make blanket forts. I'm 22yr btw and fuck you forts are awesome at all ages. Blacklights and glowsticks etc and probably some cards and music. She brings her friend but idc didn't expect anything too major to happen tbh.
Anyway... night went good, first time we actually hung out and it gets x-rated by the end of the night while the friend is still awake. Won't go into details but the jist of it was I didn't get much sleep.
She starts calling me babe and hun and shit and giving me the heart symbol (never reciprocated anything and ignored it when I could). She's txting me a ton and using all those words less than like 48hours later.
<.< red sirens are going off in my head when she asks me if we are a couple now. I'm now thinking how/when I should bail.
Red flags indeed. How you should bail depends on what exactly you want. If you would like to continue sleeping with her, your best approach is probably to be upfront with her that you enjoyed the experience but it doesn't mean you're a couple. If not, you can either let her know that upfront or gradually reduce contact to zero by responding less and less to her.
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On May 06 2013 20:59 sunprince wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 09:10 Zooper31 wrote: Met new girl, invited her over after I explained how awesome I make blanket forts. I'm 22yr btw and fuck you forts are awesome at all ages. Blacklights and glowsticks etc and probably some cards and music. She brings her friend but idc didn't expect anything too major to happen tbh.
Anyway... night went good, first time we actually hung out and it gets x-rated by the end of the night while the friend is still awake. Won't go into details but the jist of it was I didn't get much sleep.
She starts calling me babe and hun and shit and giving me the heart symbol (never reciprocated anything and ignored it when I could). She's txting me a ton and using all those words less than like 48hours later.
<.< red sirens are going off in my head when she asks me if we are a couple now. I'm now thinking how/when I should bail. Red flags indeed. How you should bail depends on what exactly you want. If you would like to continue sleeping with her, your best approach is probably to be upfront with her that you enjoyed the experience but it doesn't mean you're a couple. If not, you can either let her know that upfront or gradually reduce contact to zero by responding less and less to her.
In a few weeks, some girl will post in a "dating how's your luck thread" on some girly website asking "why do guys play games T_T he invited me to his blanketfort to have sex and then he started ignoring me, should I ignore him back?"
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On May 06 2013 21:53 TOCHMY wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 20:59 sunprince wrote:On May 06 2013 09:10 Zooper31 wrote: Met new girl, invited her over after I explained how awesome I make blanket forts. I'm 22yr btw and fuck you forts are awesome at all ages. Blacklights and glowsticks etc and probably some cards and music. She brings her friend but idc didn't expect anything too major to happen tbh.
Anyway... night went good, first time we actually hung out and it gets x-rated by the end of the night while the friend is still awake. Won't go into details but the jist of it was I didn't get much sleep.
She starts calling me babe and hun and shit and giving me the heart symbol (never reciprocated anything and ignored it when I could). She's txting me a ton and using all those words less than like 48hours later.
<.< red sirens are going off in my head when she asks me if we are a couple now. I'm now thinking how/when I should bail. Red flags indeed. How you should bail depends on what exactly you want. If you would like to continue sleeping with her, your best approach is probably to be upfront with her that you enjoyed the experience but it doesn't mean you're a couple. If not, you can either let her know that upfront or gradually reduce contact to zero by responding less and less to her. In a few weeks, some girl will post in a "dating how's your luck thread" on some girly website asking "why do guys play games T_T he invited me to his blanketfort to have sex and then he started ignoring me, should I ignore him back?" It's funny, since he made this post before:
On April 22 2013 09:43 Zooper31 wrote: Well fuck chicks. After 3rd date she tells me she's not interested in a relationship and she said she was sorry for any confusion. Politely told her to fuck off. She contacts me through a dating website, spends time with me alone several times and compliments me. I can deal with you telling me it just didn't work out and I'm not your type, that's fine, I can handle rejection. Don't fucking play it off like it was never your intention to get into a relationship, that's just gonna piss me off. Ty for wasting my time and not having the balls to admit it. Welcome to irl /ignore.
I am no longer going to pay for anything for a girl ever until it's the 3rd+ date. I like being chivalrous and all but I'm tired of a girl not having the guts to tell me the truth and just wasting my time and money. I ain't making bank or anything ffs.
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On May 06 2013 22:22 Grumbels wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 21:53 TOCHMY wrote:On May 06 2013 20:59 sunprince wrote:On May 06 2013 09:10 Zooper31 wrote: Met new girl, invited her over after I explained how awesome I make blanket forts. I'm 22yr btw and fuck you forts are awesome at all ages. Blacklights and glowsticks etc and probably some cards and music. She brings her friend but idc didn't expect anything too major to happen tbh.
Anyway... night went good, first time we actually hung out and it gets x-rated by the end of the night while the friend is still awake. Won't go into details but the jist of it was I didn't get much sleep.
She starts calling me babe and hun and shit and giving me the heart symbol (never reciprocated anything and ignored it when I could). She's txting me a ton and using all those words less than like 48hours later.
<.< red sirens are going off in my head when she asks me if we are a couple now. I'm now thinking how/when I should bail. Red flags indeed. How you should bail depends on what exactly you want. If you would like to continue sleeping with her, your best approach is probably to be upfront with her that you enjoyed the experience but it doesn't mean you're a couple. If not, you can either let her know that upfront or gradually reduce contact to zero by responding less and less to her. In a few weeks, some girl will post in a "dating how's your luck thread" on some girly website asking "why do guys play games T_T he invited me to his blanketfort to have sex and then he started ignoring me, should I ignore him back?" It's funny, since he made this post before: Show nested quote +On April 22 2013 09:43 Zooper31 wrote: Well fuck chicks. After 3rd date she tells me she's not interested in a relationship and she said she was sorry for any confusion. Politely told her to fuck off. She contacts me through a dating website, spends time with me alone several times and compliments me. I can deal with you telling me it just didn't work out and I'm not your type, that's fine, I can handle rejection. Don't fucking play it off like it was never your intention to get into a relationship, that's just gonna piss me off. Ty for wasting my time and not having the balls to admit it. Welcome to irl /ignore.
I am no longer going to pay for anything for a girl ever until it's the 3rd+ date. I like being chivalrous and all but I'm tired of a girl not having the guts to tell me the truth and just wasting my time and money. I ain't making bank or anything ffs.
LOL the irony :D
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recently ive been growing some feelings for a friend in my circle of friends who i have been close with for the last 4 years. we both never talked to each other outside of when all of my friends hung out and when we go out and party we never payed much attention to each other either. welllllll one night it was like 3 of us and i was drunk and i remember flirting with her a lot. ever since then we have been socializing alot and last time we couple times we went out we were pretty touchy. im pretty sure i could score with her but then my feelings for her would grow more and if she just wants to have sex and thats it then ima be like -.-. when i look at women i dont just see them to have sex. i always instead try to look for a potential girlfriend. im a virgin and i only been in a serious relationship once. idk i guess im just more of a relationship kinda guy even tho ive only been in one. maybe if i just lost it back in hs when i didnt give a shit about anything then these issues wouldnt come up. but yea idk what to do, i know she wants to go out wednesday and wants me to come. i guess ill try and figure something out then
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Right, long story incoming.
There's this girl I'm interested in (not really sure if I like like her yet, but I want to find out enough that I'm contemplating doing something about it, which is a big deal for me ) and the way she talks to me in text says she might be interested as well (though she could just be friendly, I can never tell). There are however, some... complications.
I used to share some classes with her back in high school. We never really talked or did anything together back then, I simply knew of her existence. Through friends I later met her sister, and had a huge crush on her for a while. That's years ago now, and I can honestly say it's no longer a big deal anymore to me. Considering that family is rather open, I assume the girl I like (call her J) knows about this, though I can't know for sure. I talked to the sister about it and she said she wouldn't mind me potentially dating J (and to reiterate, we're the same age).
We never really talked much, untill recently. J moved to a new city and I asked her to join me and some friends when we were going out in that city. She said yes, and even though we didn't end up going, we texted back and forth a bit afterwards. She later on invited me to come to her bday party, which I went to (but nothing really happened because I'm a huge coward among people I don't really know). She was friendly to me in text leading up to said party. Telling me how much she was looking forward to me being there, offering a place to sleep even though I live only 15 miles away, ending most of het sentences with exclamation marks (I'm told that this often means people are interested, much like ending sentences with full stops often means anger/irritation), etc. She could very well just be acting really friendly, as I said I'm bad at telling.
Normally (as seen on this page and the one before that), the advice would be to assume she's into you and just go for it, and normally I'd agree, but I'm not sure if the situation here is a bit awkward, with me having had a crush on her sister. I wonder if me going for it would make things awkward whenever I'm at their house (as said, her sister is a friend of mine) or with mutual friends. I can also see why me having a crush on her sister a few years ago and now potentially being interested in the "little sister" could be seen as rather weird or creepy by some.
What do you guys think?
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On May 06 2013 23:17 Mikau wrote:Right, long story incoming. There's this girl I'm interested in (not really sure if I like like her yet, but I want to find out enough that I'm contemplating doing something about it, which is a big deal for me  ) and the way she talks to me in text says she might be interested as well (though she could just be friendly, I can never tell). There are however, some... complications. I used to share some classes with her back in high school. We never really talked or did anything together back then, I simply knew of her existence. Through friends I later met her sister, and had a huge crush on her for a while. That's years ago now, and I can honestly say it's no longer a big deal anymore to me. Considering that family is rather open, I assume the girl I like (call her J) knows about this, though I can't know for sure. I talked to the sister about it and she said she wouldn't mind me potentially dating J (and to reiterate, we're the same age). We never really talked much, untill recently. J moved to a new city and I asked her to join me and some friends when we were going out in that city. She said yes, and even though we didn't end up going, we texted back and forth a bit afterwards. She later on invited me to come to her bday party, which I went to (but nothing really happened because I'm a huge coward among people I don't really know). She was friendly to me in text leading up to said party. Telling me how much she was looking forward to me being there, offering a place to sleep even though I live only 15 miles away, ending most of het sentences with exclamation marks (I'm told that this often means people are interested, much like ending sentences with full stops often means anger/irritation), etc. She could very well just be acting really friendly, as I said I'm bad at telling. Normally (as seen on this page and the one before that), the advice would be to assume she's into you and just go for it, and normally I'd agree, but I'm not sure if the situation here is a bit awkward, with me having had a crush on her sister. I wonder if me going for it would make things awkward whenever I'm at their house (as said, her sister is a friend of mine) or with mutual friends. I can also see why me having a crush on her sister a few years ago and now potentially being interested in the "little sister" could be seen as rather weird or creepy by some. What do you guys think?
It's only awkward if you think it's awkward. J's sister didn't mind, yeah? So do you think it's awkward?
EDIT: Also, why should you care what others think of you and your potential relationship? Never ever care what others think. All that matters is what YOU think.
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Well, I talked to some (non mutual) friends about it and they all sort of went "jesus dude, nót cool". I mean, what I, J and possibly the sister think are what's most important here obviously. The sister says she doesn't mind (though with women saying and thinking can be two very different things ), J probably knows and still doesn't mind contact with me at least and I personally know the thing with J's sister is in the past and not at all relevant anymore, but I can't deny it's a potentially weird situation.
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To me it sounds more like you're trying to rationalize the situation with the hopes of finding an excuse not to persue it. Being afraid of rejection is fine, letting that fear dictate your behaviour usually isn't.
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That's probably true, but to be fair to me I couldn´t know that for sure before I posted here.
I'm just horrible at anything involving girls in any other way than friendship. Second-guessing myself in this kind of situation isn't that weird to me. It helps to be reassured in this case.
I'm guessing input on whether or not she's into me isn't something people on the internet half the world away can give me right? (A).
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On May 06 2013 23:17 Mikau wrote:Right, long story incoming. There's this girl I'm interested in (not really sure if I like like her yet, but I want to find out enough that I'm contemplating doing something about it, which is a big deal for me  ) and the way she talks to me in text says she might be interested as well (though she could just be friendly, I can never tell). There are however, some... complications. I used to share some classes with her back in high school. We never really talked or did anything together back then, I simply knew of her existence. Through friends I later met her sister, and had a huge crush on her for a while. That's years ago now, and I can honestly say it's no longer a big deal anymore to me. Considering that family is rather open, I assume the girl I like (call her J) knows about this, though I can't know for sure. I talked to the sister about it and she said she wouldn't mind me potentially dating J (and to reiterate, we're the same age). We never really talked much, untill recently. J moved to a new city and I asked her to join me and some friends when we were going out in that city. She said yes, and even though we didn't end up going, we texted back and forth a bit afterwards. She later on invited me to come to her bday party, which I went to (but nothing really happened because I'm a huge coward among people I don't really know). She was friendly to me in text leading up to said party. Telling me how much she was looking forward to me being there, offering a place to sleep even though I live only 15 miles away, ending most of het sentences with exclamation marks (I'm told that this often means people are interested, much like ending sentences with full stops often means anger/irritation), etc. She could very well just be acting really friendly, as I said I'm bad at telling. Normally (as seen on this page and the one before that), the advice would be to assume she's into you and just go for it, and normally I'd agree, but I'm not sure if the situation here is a bit awkward, with me having had a crush on her sister. I wonder if me going for it would make things awkward whenever I'm at their house (as said, her sister is a friend of mine) or with mutual friends. I can also see why me having a crush on her sister a few years ago and now potentially being interested in the "little sister" could be seen as rather weird or creepy by some. What do you guys think?
UR DAMN 2 HE11 0LD MAMA SAYZ G0 2 BED A11 FUK1N READY U L0SE L0 L1FE DAMN 2 HE11 CR1TTER, SHAK1N DA DAMN 2 0LD AZZ W0NT GETT U ANNY WARE BUTT HERPEZ D1SEASE ANN U N0 TH1Z 2 BEE VERY DAMN 2 HE11 TRUE, GUEZZ U W0NT TAK 0UR W0RD UPP 4 1T C0Z U D0NT N0 US D0 U, G1V 1T SUM FDAMN T1ME AFTER U HAV UR 0WN VERY F1RST DAMN 2 HE11 D1SEASE U JUS M1GHT WAK UUP, C0Z UR B0B0 JUS M1GHT BEE B00RNN DED, BUTT WEE CANT TE11 U A DAMN TH1NGG, U G0TTA WA1K DA DAMN R.0.A.D. A11 BUY UR DAMN SE1F U ST1NK1N F0U1 F001<<
User was temp banned for this post.
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On May 06 2013 22:22 Grumbels wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2013 21:53 TOCHMY wrote:On May 06 2013 20:59 sunprince wrote:On May 06 2013 09:10 Zooper31 wrote: Met new girl, invited her over after I explained how awesome I make blanket forts. I'm 22yr btw and fuck you forts are awesome at all ages. Blacklights and glowsticks etc and probably some cards and music. She brings her friend but idc didn't expect anything too major to happen tbh.
Anyway... night went good, first time we actually hung out and it gets x-rated by the end of the night while the friend is still awake. Won't go into details but the jist of it was I didn't get much sleep.
She starts calling me babe and hun and shit and giving me the heart symbol (never reciprocated anything and ignored it when I could). She's txting me a ton and using all those words less than like 48hours later.
<.< red sirens are going off in my head when she asks me if we are a couple now. I'm now thinking how/when I should bail. Red flags indeed. How you should bail depends on what exactly you want. If you would like to continue sleeping with her, your best approach is probably to be upfront with her that you enjoyed the experience but it doesn't mean you're a couple. If not, you can either let her know that upfront or gradually reduce contact to zero by responding less and less to her. In a few weeks, some girl will post in a "dating how's your luck thread" on some girly website asking "why do guys play games T_T he invited me to his blanketfort to have sex and then he started ignoring me, should I ignore him back?" It's funny, since he made this post before: Show nested quote +On April 22 2013 09:43 Zooper31 wrote: Well fuck chicks. After 3rd date she tells me she's not interested in a relationship and she said she was sorry for any confusion. Politely told her to fuck off. She contacts me through a dating website, spends time with me alone several times and compliments me. I can deal with you telling me it just didn't work out and I'm not your type, that's fine, I can handle rejection. Don't fucking play it off like it was never your intention to get into a relationship, that's just gonna piss me off. Ty for wasting my time and not having the balls to admit it. Welcome to irl /ignore.
I am no longer going to pay for anything for a girl ever until it's the 3rd+ date. I like being chivalrous and all but I'm tired of a girl not having the guts to tell me the truth and just wasting my time and money. I ain't making bank or anything ffs.
She invited herself over not the otherway around, what I typed wasn't I guess 100% correct. She was staying at her friends house when we were talking about things to do at sleepovers and forts came up. Then she said something about how she'd love to have fun at my place instead and I gave in. I would've prefer'd to just hang out and do something alone and get to know her but she wanted to come over the next night and bring her friend so I thought, hey whats the worse that could happen.
I did tell her we're not a couple, we just met, not even been a week yet and she just said "oh ok". But she won't stop texting me nonstop all hours of the day like that never happened. I do have other things going on in my life and can't reply 24/7 :/
I am probably going to stop the relationship and just try to be friends and I'll tell her the truth. She lives nearby and we have alot of common interests afterall. If that doesn't go as planned I'll just ignore her and stop all contact.
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my roommate's trying to get away from this guy who's her classmate who's always asking her to hang out (like every other day or something like that).
she's been brushing him off all the time, 'cause she's not interested in him as a bf and not really interested in him as a conversation partner either, just wants to keep it at friendly acquaintances.
but she can't tell him to stop it, because he hasn't made any explicit advances yet, so she thinks it'd be presumptuous to tell him that she's not interested in him. but then he just keeps asking her out to these small not-really-dates, and she's so exasperated now that she's agreeing to them occasionally in the hopes that he'll finally make an explicit advance so she can just shut him down hard.
(note: this has been going on for like 6+ months.)
lesson being: don't waffle around thinking, "does she like me, does she not like me?" because then it just causes annoyance/pain for both parties. rip it off like a goddamn bandage.
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