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Have you ever been caught jacking off? - Page 13

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kroko
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
Finland2136 Posts
July 21 2008 20:33 GMT
#241
Never caught jacking off, but caught fucking... My mum busted us lol... It was np tho..
I have Sick Timing and UnReal Macro
_Grazze_
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
834 Posts
July 21 2008 21:21 GMT
#242
On July 21 2008 22:28 wurm wrote:
lol.. so many epic posts.

Caught once by my older brother. It sucks having to share a room. My bro was in the other room watching tv or playing video games, me in our room with my favorite porn mag in hand. I took it slow since I thought I had all day, those unclothed babes giving me that tingling feeling. After a little bit, I sense it. The release. Right about the same damn time, my bro starts knocking on the door. Now imagine this, you're about to explode and somebody's at the door(of course it's locked, i wasn't stupid). What do I do? Continue beating it like there's no tomorrow. I shoot into a wad of napkins and here's the best part: My fuckin' brother picks the lock. There I was, on my bed, porn mag beside me, me clutching a handful of tissues and my dick.

Thar you go, almost got caught a fair few times too.


HAAHAH this thread is so golden! And i love how ClouD ends everything with his cookie monster, it gives me the feeling like hes like "zup wtf i dont care"

Funchucks
Profile Joined June 2007
Canada2113 Posts
July 21 2008 21:40 GMT
#243
On July 22 2008 05:33 kroko wrote:
Never caught jacking off, but caught fucking... Our mum busted us lol... It was np tho..[image loading]

Not depraved enough for this thread. Had to fix it.
I serve my houseguests slices of butter.
251
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States1401 Posts
July 21 2008 21:42 GMT
#244
On July 21 2008 22:06 iG.ClouD wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 21 2008 13:31 ilj.psa wrote:
On July 21 2008 10:20 iG.ClouD wrote:
On July 21 2008 09:12 ilj.psa wrote:
On July 20 2008 21:19 iG.ClouD wrote:
On July 20 2008 12:56 yubee wrote:
the mummy is a good movie!

indeed
and btw my sister is actually hot and she wore a bikini that time (and I swear she always wanted to turn me on on purpose, cause of her super whorish attitude). I don't have pics actually, she lives somewhere earning her stuff fucking around probably, who knows [image loading]

rofl i just find this hard to believe [image loading]

I wish I was lying too. Having a bitch sister is kind of troublesome [image loading]

not just 1 pic?[image loading]

Haven't seen her in like 2 years, I don't have pics sorry :[
btw everytime I get caught by my parents they just tell me to stop being a nerd and go find a girlfriend. God I hate them aswell [image loading]


I knew italy was chill, but this is a whole new level of laid back
"If you can chill..........then chill."
Kingsp4de20
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
United States716 Posts
July 21 2008 22:15 GMT
#245
I havent been caught wackin it but theres definitly been some close calls hah.

I have been caught having sex though
I went to a party and brought this one chick back to my house with my and aparently we were being loud because I woke my mom up. She came in my room fuckin piiiiised off. All she said was get your clothes on and get the fuck down stairs. I guess we both smelled like alcohol so my parents decided to take the chick home because they didnt want me to be driving. Must have been akward for the poor girl hah. All in all wasnt so bad except my parents took me to get tested for stds ROFL.
semioldguy
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
United States7488 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-07-22 07:08:55
July 22 2008 07:08 GMT
#246
I haven't been caught masturbating, but I have been walked in on while having sex (sort of).

A couple years ago I have my girlfriend over, we are sitting on the couch in the living room and start getting a little frisky. My roommate doesn't get off work for another two hours so I figure it's plenty of time and we start getting intimate right there on the couch.

We aren't even five minutes in when I hear a key slide into the lock on the front door. As the key turns in the lock my girlfriend hears it too. She slips out from under me, grabs the only blanket on the couch and quickly dives around the corner of the living room out of sight. I stand up in search of something to cover myself with just as the front door swings open.

My roommate takes a step into our apartment and freezes with one foot in the door and the other still outside. We make eye contact as I am standing alone in the middle of the living room completely naked and with my erection pointing right at him. After a few moments of awkward silence, which lasted about a century too long I ask if he could step outside for a second. He goes back outside without saying a thing.

My girlfriend comes back out of hiding and the two of us get our clothes back on. After we get dressed I open the front door and see my roommate sitting on our steps texting someone. I tell him that he can come in now. I see a huge look of relief on his face as he comes inside and sees my girlfriend sitting on the couch and I can only imagine what he had thought up until that point.
Moderator
alffla
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Hong Kong20321 Posts
July 22 2008 07:16 GMT
#247
lmfao semioldguy hahahahahah
Graphicssavior[gm] : What is a “yawn” rape ;; Masumune - It was the year of the pig for those fucking defilers. Chill - A clinic you say? okum: SC without Korean yelling is like porn without sex. konamix: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24740 Posts
July 22 2008 07:35 GMT
#248
On July 21 2008 22:01 Yuljan wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 21 2008 21:17 Stimpacked wrote:
i just remembered, one time my hot high school teacher felt something in her hand while she was watching a movie in the cinema like there is something in her hand. She was so focused on the movie that she didn't mind, she just thought it was like the hand of the person oh her side who coincidentally touched hers. After a while she then felt something was still touching her hand like fingers and she got irriated and she looked at it, it was an old guys penis rubbing in her hand like she made my teachers hand jack-off his penis then right when she pulled her hand off there was sperm all over her fingers ... hahaha the old man immediately closed his ziper and walked away from the cinema, she was so shocked on what happend that she didn't do anythin... i cant forget that story even if that was like 8 years ago... hehehe


how where you involved? or do your teachers tell their studenty their sex life? I bet you were the old men!

I sure hope she didn't consider that event part of her sex life...
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
Smokin_Squirrel
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
Korea (South)674 Posts
July 22 2008 09:02 GMT
#249
On July 21 2008 15:25 MyStiC_Chaos wrote:
I was fucking my couch (you know stick a bag and some lotion and squeeze the cushions) and I had the sound on the porn video that was full screen to highest.

My family came home.

You walk in seeing your son with his dick in between the cushions of your couch going back and forth.

I think that's from one of the American Pie movies.
Running is the essence of battle
_Grazze_
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
834 Posts
July 22 2008 10:03 GMT
#250
On July 22 2008 18:02 Smokin_Squirrel wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 21 2008 15:25 MyStiC_Chaos wrote:
I was fucking my couch (you know stick a bag and some lotion and squeeze the cushions) and I had the sound on the porn video that was full screen to highest.

My family came home.

You walk in seeing your son with his dick in between the cushions of your couch going back and forth.

I think that's from one of the American Pie movies.


Busted? Gotta check this out further :O
SCC-Faust
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
United States3736 Posts
July 22 2008 10:05 GMT
#251
I wonder what is worse: Getting caught masturbating OR walking in when your parents are having sex.
I want to fuck Soulkey with a Zelderan.
ahswtini
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Northern Ireland22208 Posts
July 22 2008 10:09 GMT
#252
In American Pie, the guy was caught fucking a pie. Hence the name I think...
"As I've said, balance isn't about strategies or counters, it's about probability and statistics." - paralleluniverse
_Grazze_
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
834 Posts
July 22 2008 12:28 GMT
#253
Yes he was, I thought he meant in some of the other movies...
0x64
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Finland4583 Posts
July 22 2008 12:51 GMT
#254
haha semioldguy good one!
:D
Dump of assembler code from 0xffffffec to 0x64: End of assembler dump.
merz
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
Sweden2760 Posts
July 22 2008 13:10 GMT
#255
On July 22 2008 21:28 _Grazze_ wrote:
Yes he was, I thought he meant in some of the other movies...



Nope. A guy ejaculates on his own grandmother as she (and the guys mom and dad) walks in on him masturbating in front of the tv. The cum killed his grandmother (she died of shock I guess). It's like the only good scene in that movie :D

Fucking the couch doesn't ring a bell from any American Pie movie afaik ;o
Winners never quit, quitters never win.
Tinithor
Profile Joined February 2008
United States1552 Posts
July 22 2008 13:16 GMT
#256
Yea theres no couch fucking in American pie, a guy fucks a trumpet once though i think.
"Oh-My-GOD" ... "Is many mutas, Yes?"
Tinithor
Profile Joined February 2008
United States1552 Posts
July 22 2008 13:36 GMT
#257
On July 20 2008 05:17 iG.ClouD wrote:
Well actually when I was like 14 I remember masturbating over my sister when we were watching The Mummy. I was on the bed covered with my blanket and she was on a chair dressed like a bitch in the hot summer. Then when I came she noticed something was going on and she laughed and kissed me on the cheek. That was just totally weird [image loading]



This is really wierd.... but somehow i can maybe kind of understand the situation, if your sister was really a whore....

lol, i love this thread.
"Oh-My-GOD" ... "Is many mutas, Yes?"
shmay
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
United States1091 Posts
July 22 2008 15:00 GMT
#258
On July 22 2008 06:40 Funchucks wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 22 2008 05:33 kroko wrote:
Never caught jacking off, but caught fucking... My mum

Not depraved enough for this thread. Had to fix it.


Just to be safe.
50CaL.AngeL
Profile Joined April 2008
Canada69 Posts
July 22 2008 15:35 GMT
#259
I've never been caught jacking off, but I got caught getting my dick sucked a nice few times... That was some funny shit.
"MOM ! Get out! "
SteelString
Profile Joined July 2006
446 Posts
July 22 2008 15:39 GMT
#260
The only time I've come close to being caught is when my dad burst into the room, and ran right past me to my bed where he started measuring it [the bed -_-]. My cock was in hand, but he didn't even notice, so intent he was on checking to see if the fouton mattress would fit.

Crazy eh. True though
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