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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18876 Posts
September 12 2013 18:03 GMT
#5521
On September 13 2013 02:57 Mortal wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 13 2013 02:53 farvacola wrote:
On September 13 2013 02:51 KaiserKieran wrote:
On September 13 2013 02:49 farvacola wrote:
You already said the magic words; just say "I thought we were just friends?"


Her exact question is:
But do you want to know?

How the fuck do I answer that?

Well since you don't want to be a dick about it, just be honest. Say that you do want to know, as it sounds like you value her friendship, and then say that you aren't looking to date around right now.

On September 13 2013 02:52 Mortal wrote:
broke up with my girlfriend of about a year just recently. honestly don't feel as bummed as i should, so i expect it was for the best of us both. too many irreconcilable differences between us. who's my next victim? FARVA?

:D, if you come round Seattle ill be your wingman dawg.

how's about you swing your way down to Portland?

actually no, I'll make the drive.

Lol, so I take it the rumors about Portland's dating scene have a token of truth? Hiking boot city?
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
MysteryMeat1
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States3292 Posts
September 12 2013 18:06 GMT
#5522
On September 13 2013 02:53 farvacola wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 13 2013 02:51 KaiserKieran wrote:
On September 13 2013 02:49 farvacola wrote:
You already said the magic words; just say "I thought we were just friends?"


Her exact question is:
But do you want to know?

How the fuck do I answer that?

Well since you don't want to be a dick about it, just be honest. Say that you do want to know, as it sounds like you value her friendship, and then say that you aren't looking to date around right now.

Show nested quote +
On September 13 2013 02:52 Mortal wrote:
broke up with my girlfriend of about a year just recently. honestly don't feel as bummed as i should, so i expect it was for the best of us both. too many irreconcilable differences between us. who's my next victim? FARVA?

:D, if you come round Seattle ill be your wingman dawg.


Let me tag along so i can take notes on how to be a wingman. I'll go incognito with my trench coat and fake glasses, I'll even bring my spy notebook and invisible ink so no one will suspect anything...
"Cause ya know, Style before victory." -The greatest mafia player alive
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18876 Posts
September 12 2013 18:07 GMT
#5523
Just make sure you bring your mystery meat too, you never know how these things are gonna end up.
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
Mortal
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
2943 Posts
September 12 2013 18:13 GMT
#5524
in Portland, the mystery meat is a must. and no, hiking boots is WAY too generous. try Crocs with 2 pairs of staggered socks.
The universe created an audience for itself.
KaiserKieran
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States615 Posts
September 12 2013 18:16 GMT
#5525
I still like you as a friend either way.

good?
aTnClouD
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Italy2428 Posts
September 12 2013 18:20 GMT
#5526
On September 13 2013 03:16 KaiserKieran wrote:
I still like you as a friend either way.

good?

I want to keep you as a friend is better imo.
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g64/hunter692007/kruemelmonsteryn0.gif
KaiserKieran
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States615 Posts
September 12 2013 18:38 GMT
#5527
Fuck it. Just told her I just want to be friends.

Mortal
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
2943 Posts
September 12 2013 18:39 GMT
#5528
On September 13 2013 03:06 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 13 2013 02:53 farvacola wrote:
On September 13 2013 02:51 KaiserKieran wrote:
On September 13 2013 02:49 farvacola wrote:
You already said the magic words; just say "I thought we were just friends?"


Her exact question is:
But do you want to know?

How the fuck do I answer that?

Well since you don't want to be a dick about it, just be honest. Say that you do want to know, as it sounds like you value her friendship, and then say that you aren't looking to date around right now.

On September 13 2013 02:52 Mortal wrote:
broke up with my girlfriend of about a year just recently. honestly don't feel as bummed as i should, so i expect it was for the best of us both. too many irreconcilable differences between us. who's my next victim? FARVA?

:D, if you come round Seattle ill be your wingman dawg.


Let me tag along so i can take notes on how to be a wingman. I'll go incognito with my trench coat and fake glasses, I'll even bring my spy notebook and invisible ink so no one will suspect anything...

funny thing is, that's everyone in Portland. so much so that you'll stand out being so inconspicuous. meta.
The universe created an audience for itself.
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18876 Posts
September 12 2013 18:45 GMT
#5529
Just do not wear crocs mm1. Unless you're secretly Mario Batali, in which case I'm sure it'll work out fine.
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
KaiserKieran
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States615 Posts
September 12 2013 18:53 GMT
#5530
DISASTER AVERTED I REPEAT DISASTER AVERTED!!!!

GOD THIS THREAD IS AWESOME
PooLsharK
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany179 Posts
September 12 2013 19:21 GMT
#5531
On top of my game and dating a foreign chick!

[image loading]

User was warned for this post
Dang ol' pretty pretty pizza
Mortal
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
2943 Posts
September 12 2013 19:41 GMT
#5532
On September 13 2013 03:45 farvacola wrote:
Just do not wear crocs mm1. Unless you're secretly Mario Batali, in which case I'm sure it'll work out fine.

i might be mario batali.
The universe created an audience for itself.
kaykaykay
Profile Joined July 2012
Singapore637 Posts
September 13 2013 01:52 GMT
#5533
On September 12 2013 23:16 kaykaykay wrote:
So this girl i like in school, ( she's 18. real athlete type, swims, tennis and just gives people the "I'm always improving" vibe which i find really attractive. )

During the holidays, we went out together in a group once, we had fun and everything and i tried to escalate things from there.
However when school started, she has her own group of friends and I kinda botched things with a letter.

She said she lost the letter I wrote asking her out which I find it hard to believe hahaha I might be wrong though.

today we met up for some extra curricular activities and during the exercise, we had to write each other letters.
She tells me to continue being mysterious, knowledgeable and confident, that I'm reliable. ( yes I help her too damn much, she's the president of my club )

how would you carry on from here? I'm trying to encourage more communication between us because I find that lacking sorely..


Advice keenly needed.
Starve the ego, feed the soul.
VayneAuthority
Profile Joined October 2012
United States8983 Posts
September 13 2013 02:47 GMT
#5534
asking for a girl friend

how do you get across to a guy that you are just studying and having coffee as friends and not as a date

what is the general consensus oh tL citizens
I come in for the scraps
Zooper31
Profile Joined May 2009
United States5714 Posts
September 13 2013 02:55 GMT
#5535
On September 13 2013 10:52 kaykaykay wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 12 2013 23:16 kaykaykay wrote:
So this girl i like in school, ( she's 18. real athlete type, swims, tennis and just gives people the "I'm always improving" vibe which i find really attractive. )

During the holidays, we went out together in a group once, we had fun and everything and i tried to escalate things from there.
However when school started, she has her own group of friends and I kinda botched things with a letter.

She said she lost the letter I wrote asking her out which I find it hard to believe hahaha I might be wrong though.

today we met up for some extra curricular activities and during the exercise, we had to write each other letters.
She tells me to continue being mysterious, knowledgeable and confident, that I'm reliable. ( yes I help her too damn much, she's the president of my club )

how would you carry on from here? I'm trying to encourage more communication between us because I find that lacking sorely..


Advice keenly needed.


Just ask her out in person. Though the letter was a nice idea and a lot of girls would find that really sweet and charming. Asking in person shows more confidence and you're gonna have to deal with her eventually.

Just get her alone for like 3-5min and then just go for it. You can go from there depending on her response and how she reacts. Ask her to go do something together or just straight up ask her to be your gf haha. Haven't been in highschool for awhile but more than a few HS relationships I knew of started pretty bluntly lol.
Asato ma sad gamaya, tamaso ma jyotir gamaya, mrtyor mamrtam gamaya
WarSame
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada1950 Posts
September 13 2013 03:25 GMT
#5536
On September 13 2013 11:47 VayneAuthority wrote:
asking for a girl friend

how do you get across to a guy that you are just studying and having coffee as friends and not as a date

what is the general consensus oh tL citizens

I don't think you can really go for coffee with a guy(or vice versa, whichever way you swing for whichever gender) and not have it at least somewhat assumed there is something more.

I'd just straight up say it, but I lack tact as a matter of fact.
Can it be I stayed away too long? Did you miss these rhymes while I was gone?
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
September 13 2013 03:32 GMT
#5537
On September 13 2013 11:47 VayneAuthority wrote:
asking for a girl friend

how do you get across to a guy that you are just studying and having coffee as friends and not as a date

what is the general consensus oh tL citizens


I think it's pretty clear that it won't be a date as long as studying is the focus of your meeting. If I were to ask a girl to study with me over cofee or whatever I wouldnt think of it as a date but rather to get to know her better to decide if I wanted to date her, and then ask more directly to hang out.
biology]major
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States2253 Posts
September 13 2013 03:32 GMT
#5538
On September 13 2013 11:47 VayneAuthority wrote:
asking for a girl friend

how do you get across to a guy that you are just studying and having coffee as friends and not as a date

what is the general consensus oh tL citizens



do the worst thing you can to him, treat him as a brother
Question.?
Jonoman92
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States9111 Posts
September 13 2013 03:51 GMT
#5539
Tinder is out for Android now! Gonna give this a go.
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
September 13 2013 06:13 GMT
#5540
On September 13 2013 12:51 Jonoman92 wrote:
Tinder is out for Android now! Gonna give this a go.

Oh fuk LOL. I feel like this could be the beginning of some terribly hilarious thread stories.
User was warned for too many mimes.
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