Danish girl look for this child´s father on youtub - Page 5
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dka
United States132 Posts
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arb
Noobville17921 Posts
what the fuck? | ||
GreEny K
Germany7312 Posts
On September 12 2009 22:01 Spenguin wrote: I'm more interested in the 35 yr old who gave up her son for adoption 10 years ago then found said son on the internet and had sex with him. Thats crazy... But this video is kinda interesting, she knows she probably wont find him but at least she is giving it a shot and she doesnt seem crazy... | ||
SanguineToss
Canada815 Posts
On September 13 2009 09:08 dka wrote: Its a very sincere video, I don't know why everyone is hating. She obviously loves her kid, and this is more about her child than the father. All we need now is Aegrean, where art thou? I know wtf. | ||
Gogleion
United States534 Posts
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thopol
Japan4560 Posts
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MountainDewJunkie
United States10341 Posts
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nttea
Sweden4353 Posts
On September 13 2009 04:04 EvilTeletubby wrote: Despite the 4chan attitude, Frits actually brought up something that I think is interesting from a social experimentation point of view, and despite the fact many people will disagree with it, I believe to be 100% true. People would care much less if she was fat/ugly... we have a predisposition to be more helpful and more trusting of people deemed physically beautiful, this has actually been proven. While there are plenty who would care the same either way, it would be extra effort for many, and some not at all. not really, there's a bunch of people here calling her a retarded bitch. Also some nicer people that says she's brave and so on. Most likely if she was fat/ugly there still would be both crowds, Maybe the difference being the haters would act more confident and loud. Good luck to her, hope everything turns out great. | ||
daz
Canada643 Posts
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Arnic
81 Posts
On September 13 2009 10:37 daz wrote: why the hell didn't she just have an abortion? Oops, a mistake was made. Let's get rid of the evidence so no one has to know. Can you even begin to imagine what it would be like for a woman to make that kind of decision? Not only would she spend the rest of her life regretting a one night stand but she'd be carrying the cost of a baby she decided to get rid of with her as well. I'm not against abortion but I don't think it should be used as a convenient method of late birth control. If it's used like that, it makes it so damn easy for stupid people to fuck around without having to face any consequences for it. As a lot of people in this thread have pointed out, she made a mistake and she knows it. She could have taken what some might consider to be an easy way out but she didn't. Accidental pregnancies happen, both within and outside of relationships and sometimes, abortion could be the right course of action, depending on the circumstances. Maybe it would be better than having a child in a horribly unsuitable situation that would tear people apart, where the child would suffer greatly for having those particular people as parents. People do stupid things. Fact. They don't mean to, there's no malicious intention or willful idiocy. Insert a large quantity of alcohol into any human being and it's guaranteed to affect judgement and rational thinking. I'm pretty sure that a large number of guys, including some here, would sleep with a woman they considered to be hot if they were drunk enough and given the chance. Not everyone but definitely a fair few. So let's say something like that happened. Drunken one night stand and the girl gets pregnant. Which would you prefer? a) That she never tells you, she has an abortion and you'll never know about it. You can carry on with your life as you would have, doing all the things you wanted to do. Never worrying that the next time you get drunk, the same thing could happen again. She's kept your conscience clear and paved the way for you to be free, without any taking any responsbility for the possible results of having a quick sexual encounter. Congratulations buddy, you're absolved. She took responsibility so you wouldn't have to. Is that fair? b) You had the one night stand thinking you'd never see her again, it was fun for both of you and you've no regrets but one day you run into her again and she's obviously pregnant. She tells you that the baby is yours and all the dates would fit. Do you immediately think she's a lying slut trying to get you to be the father of someone else's baby. She slept with you when she was drunk so she must obviously sleep with other people in exactly the same way. Oh, how disgusting, aren't you so glad you're nothing like that. Or do you think, well we can certainly prove if the baby is mine and oh fuck, oh fuck, I didn't want this, I'm not ready for this, what will I tell my parents? What are people going to think of me? How the fuck do I deal with this, how can I be a father when I haven't even finished growing up. But I did this, we did this and I don't know how but there'll be a way to sort it out, we can talk about it and find out what's best for both of us. We can both decide. c) You see her again and she tells you that she got pregnant and had an abortion. How would you feel? Would it be a wake up call that you're not free to do whatever the fuck you like and consequence be damned? Would you stand there looking at her while your mind filled with thoughts of tiny fingers clasped around yours, first words, the way a baby can laugh with total freedom at nothing more than a silly face or funny noise. Would you imagine hesitant first steps towards you, all that hope, pride and the fear the child might fall as they try so hard to place one foot in front of the other, just like you do? How that child could have grown up, into a smaller version of you. Someone to love and cherish, to guide and to protect. How would you feel about the girl you slept with? Would you give her a big smile and say "Thanks!" then walk away or would you consider her lying in a hospital bed, waiting to be anaesthetised after making a choice by herself that you should have been there for? As she's wheeled into the operating theatre, is she thinking about crayons and baby food, how it would feel to stand by a cot illuminated by the soft glow of a nightlight, watching her baby dream and knowing that when she wakes up after the procedure, they'll have sucked it out of her womb and she'll be seeing the blood from where it was for the next two weeks or is she thinking "I'm glad this is so easy, I can't wait to go out, get drunk and sleep with someone else as soon as I've stopped leaking."? Considering that you don't know anything about this girl but that didn't stop you from sleeping with her, what type of person would you like her to be? Would it make you feel better if she was a cheap skank or would you hope that even in a drunken state, you'd still be able to recognise decency in someone? Choices can seem obvious when you're not the one having to make them. I think she did the right thing. She gave the baby a chance and she gave the father a chance as well. Even if he does see that video or he finds out about the baby, he doesn't have to come forwards and admit it. Nobody can make him. Thousands of people have one night stands, even if he told his friends he slept with a hot danish girl called Karen and they're like "Dude, is that her??" He could just say "No" and carry on being a normal guy, in another country, living his life without the worry of a kid in it. She didn't have an abortion because she hopes that the guy is like her. An every day, nice and normal person who made a mistake and although they might regret it, they will try to make things right. She felt that she could give the baby the chance of having a good life and a loving mother. Even if she never finds the father, I think it's better for a child to have one guaranteed good parent in the form of a single mother than two parents who hate the fuck out of each other, argue all the time and resent the child for existing as a reminder of what they once felt for each other. Or the other possibilites like abortion or adoption. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On September 12 2009 22:01 Spenguin wrote: I'm more interested in the 35 yr old who gave up her son for adoption 10 years ago then found said son on the internet and had sex with him. that's the claim just because someone says something doesn't make it true. | ||
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KwarK
United States42689 Posts
Obv abortion isn't ideal, birth control is. But you shouldn't be punished for sex, if you don't want a child, don't have one. | ||
Draconizard
628 Posts
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Arnic
81 Posts
On September 13 2009 13:43 Kwark wrote: Arnic, sex should be fun and shouldn't have lasting consequences for the rest of your life. It's a recreational activity, there's nothing intrinsically about it that makes it different. Stupid people should be able to fuck around without having consequences, they're not hurting anyone else, it's consensual fun. If you're going to get all "what could have been..." about a fetus then you might as well about sperm and periods. Conception is an arbitrary cut off point, just as birth is. Obv abortion isn't ideal, birth control is. But you shouldn't be punished for sex, if you don't want a child, don't have one. I completely agree with you that sex should be fun and it is. There are hundreds of thousands of people having sex right now and that's great, they're probably all enjoying it and that's great too. There's nothing wrong with consensual and mutual pleasure if it's not hurting anyone else. I have no problem whatsoever with people wanting to enjoy themselves and choosing sex as a means to do that. As long as they're careful, use contraception and take precautions. Stupid people should be able to fuck around without having consequences, they're not hurting anyone else Ah but they are. I wouldn't use the Danish girl as an example of this but consider the men and women who are genuinely stupid or completely unconcerned about consequences. People who would sleep around without using contraception or making sure their partner is clean. Or the people who see sex as a game with a scoring system. These people may be in the minority but their actions will hurt others. Directly and indirectly. If an irresponsible woman gets pregnant by an irresponsible man and she decides to keep the child, the child will suffer. If the irresponsible man keeps getting women pregnant and they keep the kids, he'll be liable for child support. He'll literally pay for his mistakes and I don't imagine he'd be too happy about doing so. Those children grow up and what do they learn from their parents? Do all those children grow up with loving families, good parents and happy lives? Or do they learn from the actions of those around them that it's OK to fuck around because there are ways and means of completely avoiding responsibility for it and there's always welfare. More kids = more money so, hey, procreation is a bit like having a job. Watching a film with someone is consensual fun and it's likely to be free of serious consequence, therefore I'd encourage anyone to watch a film. Indulging in casual sex can have serious consequences so I'd say that it's an act which requires considerable thought before you engage in it. "What if's" and "what might happen" are a necessary evaluation process if you're going to make a choice about something. You don't just fall over and land in a vagina, it takes two people to make sex happen so both people need to consider what could happen on an individual level aside from thinking "let's have sex because it's fun". Sex can have a wonderful outcome but it can also have undesired results. It's not as easy as saying "if you don't want kids, don't have them." Any contraceptive method has a chance of failure, even if it's amazingly low, the chance is still there. The only way to 100% guarantee you don't have kids is to be gay, lesbian or not have sex entirely and even then there are still risks. As I said, I'm not against abortion. I'm certainly not going to shed a tear for the sperm that end up in tissues or periods. Only takes one to jerk off and women are meant to have periods, one isn't mutual most of the time and the other is entirely natural. Neither of those things have serious consequences. And the main point of all my "what iffing" and "how would you feel" is to hopefully make people think a little more, especially if they're asking why didn't the danish girl have an abortion? Sometimes it's not that easy or simple. I don't think people should be punished for having sex, ever. It is fun and it's wonderful but it's not like going to the cinema or going out for a meal. There is always the chance that having sex could leave with you something more than you expected so that needs to be considered before you have it and you should do everything you can to prevent and lessen the risks. But, if someone is too stupid to see the potential risks, they shouldn't be having sex. | ||
nttea
Sweden4353 Posts
http://ekstrabladet.dk/nyheder/samfund/article1221145.ece according to them she is just an actor, and they claim it is no longer a question IF this is fake, but who is behind the stunt. | ||
d_so
Korea (South)3262 Posts
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BlackJack
United States10501 Posts
On September 13 2009 10:37 daz wrote: why the hell didn't she just have an abortion? What are you talking about? Where in the video does she say she regreats having the kid at all? She obviously loves the kid and is happy about having it. She is just trying to find out who the father is. | ||
Krikkitone
United States1451 Posts
On September 13 2009 13:43 Kwark wrote: . Conception is an arbitrary cut off point, just as birth is.. Which is why we should be able to dispose of any human tissue that hasn't reached full sentience and reasoning capacity... (happens at about the age of 25.) | ||
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KwarK
United States42689 Posts
On September 13 2009 15:23 Krikkitone wrote: Which is why we should be able to dispose of any human tissue that hasn't reached full sentience and reasoning capacity... (happens at about the age of 25.) Normally I'd say that's ridiculous but in your case I think you might be right. | ||
pubbanana
United States3063 Posts
My adventure begins now. | ||
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