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No assignment has ever made me want to burst out laughing, make me facepalm, or make me shout "Bullshit" as much as this one did.
All week, my English teacher was telling us about this essay we're going to have to write in class. She gave no indication on what we had to write about it, but it was obvious, since we just finished our novel, The Haunting of Hill House, that it was something to do with that.
So we had to fill out these charts and notes out, getting ready to write an essay. I did this half heartedly, because, well, I'm both lazy and confident in my ability to do it well.
The day of the essay. We were given an hour to write it. Not type it, for some reason. Hand write it. And so I write a 4 page essay (double spaced). I spent the first 15 minutes thinking of a thesis to write about, searching through my notes and reading through my book. Finally, I choose why one of the main characters, Eleanor Vance, was truly alone all her life or something. Because I spent the first 15 minutes, in reality, doing nothing, I didn't have time to really finish my conclusion. Instead, I just had a 'clincher', something that ends the essay and leaves the reader in thought. I didn't restate my thesis, and I didn't summarize the main points (I never understand why these two things are separate; they sound about the same to me.)
Two days later, I get my essay back. I was actually quite proud of the essay I wrote, excluding the conclusion. Instead of the sparling 95/100 I was expecting, I get this:
"[My_name], you wrote a simply amazing and thoughtful essay! (Especially in class in an hour!)
The problem is that you didn't write about the topic assigned in the directions.
That is the reason for your grade."
I see on the top part of the direction sheet we were given, which is taken up almost entirely by an outline on the structure of the essay, etc. There is one paragraph at the top. Usually, this is where the obvious directions go, like in math class, if you just covered exponentiating logarithms, it says "Exponentiate the following logarithmic fuctions". You never read this part, because its obvious what you are supposed to do. You just spent the last hour doing it!
The paragraph on the direction sheet reads:
"The Haunting of Hill House by shirley Jackson is an example of the Gothic novel genre. Referring to the notes relaing to the literary elements of Gothic literature, select any three (3) elements from the list that are obvious in the novel. Follow the suggestions in the outline below..."
I turn the paper back over to find what my grade was.
66/100 D
Hilarious as hell at the time. I wanted to facepalm at my missing the directions. And, tbh, i think its dumb how, even though my essay is "amazing and thoughtful", I still get a D.
I added up the score, it should have been an 89/100.
Fuck.
 
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Baa?21242 Posts
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I don't get how you would start an essay without reading the directions. Like you're just going to write about whatever you want? In 16 years of schooling, I've never seen an essay without at least some kind of topic given.
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On March 20 2009 07:17 RoieTRS wrote:
And, tbh, i think its honestly really dumb how, even though my essay is "amazing and thoughtful", I still get a D.
If you offer to pay me 50,000 dollars for a car, and I show up with a really awesome motorcycle, are you going to pay me the money? Of course not.
I feel for you, trust me, but you can't blame the teacher for giving you a bad grade when you didn't turn in what she asked for. Imo you are lucky you got a passing grade. Hope it doesn't screw you in the class though. 
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Calgary25977 Posts
Haha
I remember we got a pop quiz in chemistry once. One of the questions was more like a story. It was simply a series of statements (about 5) detailing what a smart chemistry student did in some concentration or mixture or whatever we were learning about. Now, despite there being no question, it was obvious what the teacher wanted you to do. So I wrote down my steps and solved for whatever we were solving for.
This test was marked by the students. So I got someones test to mark. When we got to that question he had just written down "My, that's a lovely story." I had no choice but to assign full credit.
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On March 20 2009 07:21 Pawsom wrote:
I don't get how you would start an essay without reading the directions. Like you're just going to write about whatever you want? In 16 years of schooling, I've never seen an essay without at least some kind of topic given.
yeah... i don't understand how you can not read the prompt and write an essay then complain about a bad grade.
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On March 20 2009 07:28 Chill wrote:Haha I remember we got a pop quiz in chemistry once. One of the questions was more like a story. It was simply a series of statements (about 5) detailing what a smart chemistry student did in some concentration or mixture or whatever we were learning about. Now, despite there being no question, it was obvious what the teacher wanted you to do. So I wrote down my steps and solved for whatever we were solving for. This test was marked by the students. So I got someones test to mark. When we got to that question he had just written down "My, that's a lovely story." I had no choice but to assign full credit.
Haha, what did you get on it?
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Heh.
Actually something similar happened to me recently. It was a CS course... combining theory with practice is common, so this had a written component as well as a coding one. The code you were required to write was usually somehow related to the theory.
Now, in Uwaterloo, every CS course i've taken up to this point uses the same submit procedure. I'd SSH into the unix boxes at the university, transfer my files over, make sure they compiled & worked on their environment, run the submit command, verify the files were submitted and timestamped, and be on my merry way. The written part would just be slid into a dropbox.
So this course.. was no exception. Exactly the same procedure. Online submission of code, physical submission of the written component.
A week or so passes, and I get my assignment back. I score an amazing 60something percent. What? Oh, look at that my code got 0. Damn I must've fucked something up. Let's look at the automated testing results... 16/14 (there was a bonus question). Huh. Must've been a bug; no problem, just e-mail the TA and figure it out.
TAs answer, paraphrased: "the assignment stated that you were required to submit a printout of your code as well, that's why you were given a 0"
Oops. Well, the TA wasn't lying, it was written on the assignment. It was part of the pre-amble: 'This is a programming question, blah blah blah Part C is a bonus, submit the pseudocode, blah blah blah'. Unfortunately, one of the blah blah blah's was: "Attach printouts of your codes to your written assignment"
That's a first. Analyzing code by hand with automated testing? That's classy. Hey, it's not like they have the code I submitted on their boxes. It's not like the timestamp is there to make sure it was submitted on time.
FML
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In Chemistry we were learning to read the directions and go through all the questions and make sure we knew pretty much everything we had to know before actually tackling questions on a quiz or whatever...
So one day I walk into class and we have a pop quiz it's about 20 questions long, and like everyone else I just started it... turns out the last question was something along the lines of "You don't need to do this quiz, leave all the answers blank and sit there."
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United States24640 Posts
Everybody can make a dumb mistake. But what's annoying is when people seem like they went completely out of their way to avoid the instructions even though the instructions were obviously pivotal from a mere glance.....
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Baa?21242 Posts
On March 20 2009 08:04 DeathByMonkeys wrote:
turns out the last question was something along the lines of "You don't need to do this quiz, leave all the answers blank and sit there."
I hate teachers who do that and call themselves clever.
Fuck you, some people don't need to sit there like a dumbass and read every question before staring to answer.
It's one of those things that really bothers me.
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Once we got one of those sheets where the first instruction is "Read all the instructions before starting." We were told the fastest to finish would win.
The instructions started off pretty mundane, "write your name", "solve this equation". Then it got onto stuff like "Say the alphabet out loud backwards", "Say your full name out loud.", "Say, I'm following instructions really well."
Of course the prize was the entertainment of watching everyone who didn't read the last instruction make a fool of themselves. Obviously it was "Ignore all instructions after number 2."
I suppose it was a good lesson to those who were humiliated, I'm a bit disappointed I didn't benefit from it though.
edit: ah just like deathbymonkey's situation
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Baa?21242 Posts
On March 20 2009 08:18 Nytefish wrote:
I suppose it was a good lesson to those who were humiliated
What lesson is this? Reading all the directions wastes time because on any decent-lengthed test/paper/etc, you'd need to go back and read the questions again as you actually work through it.
It teaches a really retarded lesson and educates kids to waste time.
-rabble rabble-
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The lesson is to catch the obvious trap.
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On March 20 2009 08:09 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:Show nested quote +On March 20 2009 08:04 DeathByMonkeys wrote:
turns out the last question was something along the lines of "You don't need to do this quiz, leave all the answers blank and sit there." I hate teachers who do that and call themselves clever. Fuck you, some people don't need to sit there like a dumbass and read every question before staring to answer. It's one of those things that really bothers me.
True story... most of the time I'm done with my shit before other people are done with their instructions anyways.
[/Exaggeration inserted for effect]
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that sucks dude, directions need to be straight and too the point.
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I hate directions. They are some random and superfluous paragraph that hide the key to getting a good grade in their monotony.
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On March 20 2009 07:28 Chill wrote:Haha I remember we got a pop quiz in chemistry once. One of the questions was more like a story. It was simply a series of statements (about 5) detailing what a smart chemistry student did in some concentration or mixture or whatever we were learning about. Now, despite there being no question, it was obvious what the teacher wanted you to do. So I wrote down my steps and solved for whatever we were solving for. This test was marked by the students. So I got someones test to mark. When we got to that question he had just written down "My, that's a lovely story." I had no choice but to assign full credit.
Lol that kind of reminds me of our vocabulary tests in elementary school. Part of the test was using the word in a sentence. Our teacher caught on pretty quickly, but this was a failsafe response that was always 100% correct.
"I do not know what "word" means."
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United States24640 Posts
On March 20 2009 08:22 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:Show nested quote +On March 20 2009 08:18 Nytefish wrote:
I suppose it was a good lesson to those who were humiliated
What lesson is this? Reading all the directions wastes time because on any decent-lengthed test/paper/etc, you'd need to go back and read the questions again as you actually work through it. It teaches a really retarded lesson and educates kids to waste time. -rabble rabble-
You would see things differently if you taught students who constantly made dumb mistakes because they wouldn't spend the 5 seconds to read the much-needed directions lol
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I actually hate it when the teachers feel it necessary to put down, "if false correct the statement to make it true". Of course people never bother to read the instructions and so the entire class gets that section wrong. IMO if your going to change up something we have been doing for about 10 years put it in big font or at least announce it in class.
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On March 20 2009 08:09 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:Show nested quote +On March 20 2009 08:04 DeathByMonkeys wrote:
turns out the last question was something along the lines of "You don't need to do this quiz, leave all the answers blank and sit there." I hate teachers who do that and call themselves clever. Fuck you, some people don't need to sit there like a dumbass and read every question before staring to answer. It's one of those things that really bothers me.
Agree. Who the hell starts the test backwards? Most normal people tend to do the last question LAST.
Besides, how does failing to read the last goddamn question first relate in any way to following directions?
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On March 20 2009 10:20 jinwoooooooo wrote:Show nested quote +On March 20 2009 08:09 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:On March 20 2009 08:04 DeathByMonkeys wrote:
turns out the last question was something along the lines of "You don't need to do this quiz, leave all the answers blank and sit there." I hate teachers who do that and call themselves clever. Fuck you, some people don't need to sit there like a dumbass and read every question before staring to answer. It's one of those things that really bothers me. Agree. Who the hell starts the test backwards? Most normal people tend to do the last question LAST. Besides, how does failing to read the last goddamn question first relate in any way to following directions?
because the directions said "read all the questions before starting" or something similar
yes it's retarded, but what can you do.
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On March 20 2009 10:20 jinwoooooooo wrote:Show nested quote +On March 20 2009 08:09 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:On March 20 2009 08:04 DeathByMonkeys wrote:
turns out the last question was something along the lines of "You don't need to do this quiz, leave all the answers blank and sit there." I hate teachers who do that and call themselves clever. Fuck you, some people don't need to sit there like a dumbass and read every question before staring to answer. It's one of those things that really bothers me. Agree. Who the hell starts the test backwards? Most normal people tend to do the last question LAST. Besides, how does failing to read the last goddamn question first relate in any way to following directions?
I think it's an acceptable "test" if the first instruction is very clearly "read all the questions before starting". Also it should be something that's done in tutor period or whatever the non-subject class is called.
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Baa?21242 Posts
What it's doing is testing something that has no real world applications whatsoever.
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Usually not but afterwards it appeared that people with higher cognitive ability were much more likely to do the test correctly. Anyway it should be something that's done for fun and not taken too seriously.
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lol this reminds me of a quiz i had in 7th grade, the directions at the top said to only do the even questions. The odd questions were rediculiously hard while the even ones were the stops to drawing a smiley face with a hat on the back of your paper. 90% of the class didn't read the instructions.
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On March 20 2009 11:50 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:
What it's doing is testing something that has no real world applications whatsoever.
Are you joking? It's not just a waste of time to write up a report on the wrong thing, you'll also be punished in real life. "Expenses? I thought you wanted to wanted a report on our expenditures last quarter."
Learning how to follow instructions is the most important thing that you get out of school. School really teaches you how to learn and prepare for a specific topic independently. You're lucky to be given your instructions explicitly in writing.
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EPT
