|
I was home visiting my parents for a couple weeks, and my girlfriend stopped by so we could catch up. This was my first time meeting her in person. When I joined the military last year, I located her on tinder and we started texting by exchanging lewd pics with each other. I was initially hesitant about sending her personal images of a phallic nature, but she eventually made me feel more comfortable when she said that didn't watch porn, so I figured she wouldn't have anything to compare me with. She was a Korean American girl, 20 years old, attending college but home for the summer, and her name was Sarah. She graduated from the school in my state that has an intense athletic rivalry with my former high school. During our interactions I thought it would be clever to mention my love of StarCraft but she didn't seem interested, not even when I mentioned that one of the main characters in the game shares her name. But for what it was worth, she also didn't seem to care about KPop or anime.
So while she had come to see me, I was just watching the news on TV in the living room with all the rioting and protests going on and somehow the conversation shifted towards the police and law enforcement. I asked her if she wanted something to drink, perhaps a refreshing glass of lemonade, but suddenly she began to fume and erupted in a fiery passion of toxicity.
"Why are you offering me lemonade? Because my complexion is yellow? I expected this coming from you, loser." She said.
"Actually, no the thought never crossed my mind. I just know you don't drink alcohol and who doesn't like lemonade on a hot sunny day?" I responded calmly.
"How do you feel about the cops resisting the protests? I think calling in the authorities and army was too harsh. But I want to know your opinion." She asked me in a very dry tone of voice.
"I support what's right to protect and enforce law and order. If I had gotten the order to march the streets to squash the rebellion, I would have done so." I said, while pointing to a Star Wars stormtrooper action figure on the wall.
"It's just making me feel a little sick and uneasy, you know?" She muttered under her breath.
"Well, is it your time of the month? That would explain it." I joked, in a teasing sort of way.
But she didn't find the humor in my words. She instantly got up in a hurry, stole a beer out of my fridge and left without saying a word. When I checked later I saw she had taken the Corona instead of the Heineken.
Later on, she sent me a video of herself on snapchat walking at a protest, wearing a mask, but holding hands with an African American gentleman. I posted a comment saying that covering your mouth and nose is pointless if you are willingly engaging in physical contact with strangers, but she ignored me. I was going to make a Corona joke after that but thought it would be in poor taste. I told my mom about the whole incident where my girlfriend called me immature but she just said that I should expect this would happen when dating older women.
|
I'm afraid the only thing that makes your girl blogs halfway enjoyable for me is imagining that Artosis is the narrator.
|
Osaka27095 Posts
this is some cringy shit man. go outside and get some fresh air.
|
On June 08 2020 09:23 Manifesto7 wrote: this is some cringy shit man. go outside and get some fresh air. ya this caused me physical pain to read
"Why are you offering me lemonade? Because my complexion is yellow? I expected this coming from you, loser." She said.
As a matter of fact that entire line tells me this is some utter bullshit, and a poorly crafted shit post at that
|
On June 08 2020 08:41 catplanetcatplanet wrote: I'm afraid the only thing that makes your girl blogs halfway enjoyable for me is imagining that Artosis is the narrator. His laughter is infectious, I must say. His voice reminds me of Edward Norton from Fight Club.
|
On June 08 2020 10:56 arb wrote:Show nested quote +On June 08 2020 09:23 Manifesto7 wrote: this is some cringy shit man. go outside and get some fresh air. ya this caused me physical pain to read "Why are you offering me lemonade? Because my complexion is yellow? I expected this coming from you, loser." She said. As a matter of fact that entire line tells me this is some utter bullshit, and a poorly crafted shit post at that Some chicks be crazy like that. They can be fun, playful, and idiotic at times but when men return the favor somehow females feel they deserve the right to get offended at any time for no reason.
|
On June 08 2020 06:30 artosisisthebest wrote: She was a Korean American girl, 20 years old
I told my mom about the whole incident where my girlfriend called me immature but she just said that I should expect this would happen when dating older women.
what the hecc
On June 08 2020 06:30 artosisisthebest wrote: she also didn't seem to care about anime.
She was never worth your time anyway.
|
Yes, as I'm 19 and she is 20 that makes her older (by a year but still)!
|
The only logical explanation that I can think for her outburst is that she was feeling a little racially sensitive in light of recent events and she thought that my status as a white male in the military was threatening. I did manage to calm her down before she overreacted again.
|
i read this as:
artos
is
is
the best
you're not really an artosis fan if you have girl problems, inexperienced or no.
|
User was warned for this post
|
this just doesnt read like its real and your comments in this blog make you sound even more like a troll
|
I've read satire in the past that cleverly underlines racial tensions.
However, this comes off as satire to attempt to validate your actual racism.
Yes, Artosis is the best, but no, this is a weak and unfunny blog post. Especially now.
|
If you were unfortunate enough to click on this blog and read the OP here's a quick link to take you back to the main page.
https://tl.net/forum/
No problemo.
|
I find the narrator of your story to be unreliable, and the dialogue too bland and nonsensical to be real.
That said, as a piece of writing, you did a decent job of giving the first person perspective of someone who is clearly unaware of their own madness, or faults or whatever. The most authentic part of this writing (to me) is the narrators ability to gloss over their own racist, sexist inclinations as he glides from one "durrrr" to another and the very human inability to imagine the feelings the person in front of them. Reminds me of a famous title, "The stranger beside me".
The strongest argument against the narrator is the title. Anyone acting authentically would know, my girlfriend left me for calling her feelings - vaginal secretions, and your reassurance to her ... was pointing to the bad guys in a movie named after the super-white-supremacists of the last century. Any military man would dreams of crushing domestic dissidents would do anything is his power to make the women on his arm feel safe. Right then. Not your narrator. No, he was reddit trolling a girl in real life.
Keep writing, not matter what about, over time I can see you becoming a very strong writer.
I hope you use more naunced folley in your next piece.
|
This is so fake.
Lemonade is yellow in USA or something?
|
On June 08 2020 23:38 Dangermousecatdog wrote: This is so fake.
Lemonade is yellow in USA or something? No, it was all original to this writer.
Yellow would be USA-speak for yellow. But in racist, Yellow can mean asian.
|
|
Oh, I am so dumb. Never occurred to me it wasn't yellow elsewhere.
Yes, Lemonaide is clearish-yellow
|
Ewww, why is your lemonade yellow? Those picture look like orange juice. You guys know that lemon juice isn't yellow right? WTF do you add it make it yellow? Yuck. Vomit inducing.
Look up R.Whites and sprite and 7-up. They are see through or white if cloudy.
|
|
|
|