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Mexico2170 Posts
So my grandmother gave me as a gift a 2015 model car. That's my problem.
I'm not saying it to sound like I wanted other car or something, in fact I was the one who choose it. I'm saying it because I feel bad, like I don't really deserve it.
My problem with this is that, a lot of people work hard for years until they are able to afford a car and they are so happy, and people congratulate them for their new car, for the effort and dedication it took to buy. And then there's me, a 19 year old kid who has mediocre grades and hasn't done anything that other guys haven't don't. Just got lucky.
I am not in a first world country, in fact I live in a third world country, which makes it even worse because here a lot of people won't be able to have car until very late in their lives, and some won't ever have one.
Of course this feeling disappears when I'm driving it Friday night, but still.. I mean even my 30 year old brother is driving a 98 Pontiac and here I am with a 2015 car. I know there are people who get a Mercedes as their first car ams most of my friends will probably receive a used car, but i mean it's not even 2015 yet!
So yeah, I'm glad I have it, and i am thankful for the gift, but when I received it, I couldn't help but to feel kind of bad. There's not much I can do, and I don't know why I'm posting this really, I know people will just say something like "you don't have to feel bad" but I guess I just wanted to let it out because believe it or not its kinda troublesome, and I wanted to know of anyone has ever had a similar "problem".
 
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i know how you feel bro
i guess you just have to remember the poor people when you finally raking in some of your own cash
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Kinda weird isn't it? That you "feel bad" for receiving gifts but "enjoy the gifts anyway".
I mean seriously, people complain about good things happening to them while enjoying the good things. How fucked up is that? People can't even enjoy stuff anymore.
A lot of people do it, and god damn it's annoying.
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You can always sell the car and donate the money to charity, if you want to feel better.
But the fact of life is that always some people are more lucky than others, there inequality you see is only the tip of an iceberg and you just can't feasibly do anything with the fact that even if you think that you live in a poor country, there is a billion of people on the world who are probably much worse off than you because they happened to be born in Sudan, Somalia or Bangladesh.
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United States24775 Posts
Be proud of yourself for recognizing what you described in the OP. Then get over it. The problem isn't someone who gets a nice gift they don't deserve... the problem is when someone gets a nice gift they don't deserve and then become a worse person for it. Don't let that happen to you.
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On September 20 2014 18:50 MoonfireSpam wrote:
Kinda weird isn't it? That you "feel bad" for receiving gifts but "enjoy the gifts anyway".
I mean seriously, people complain about good things happening to them while enjoying the good things. How fucked up is that? People can't even enjoy stuff anymore.
A lot of people do it, and god damn it's annoying.
perfect summary! People who were born ~1985 (or afterwards) are suffering from this phenomena "People can't even enjoy stuff anymore" pretty hard and not even comparable to people from earlier generations.
Today's generation just "forgot how" to enjoy with good stuff and especially they "forgot how" to enjoy free time.
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A new Car for a new driver is always the safest solution for all.
mediocre grades and hasn't done anything that other guys haven't don't.
Guess you realise you are pretty well off and you are not taking adventage of the opportunities life offers you.
There's not much I can do
Sure there is, get better grades, go to a student exchange, visist the world, start a buisness, make stuff happen, use your opportunities and create some for the less-lucky!
Your Grandma thinks you got the potential and have a good heart, now grandmas tend to be biased, but maybe there is some truth in it.
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What you are feeling is guilt that you have something that someone else cannot afford. Let me tell you something right here:
by feeling guilty you are not helping anyone. Just apprecite what you have (which i' m sure you do) and help other people that are less lucky than you.
Use your gift give rides when you can, and just help out others when you can. Feeling guilty won' t help anybody, and won' t make you or anybody else feel better.
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I do know this feeling actually.
I just make sure I explore the most fun out of this gift so that it isn't wasted.
I also made sure I would repay the person who gifted in some ways,
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Ah the new car feeling. Until my F-Type got hit in the bumper. Cry...
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If not repaying the person directly, then definitely pay it forward. For example, when my uncle-in-law was getting situated in America, he needed money for a larger than average down payment on a house for his new family having no credit history to establish reliability. His mother-in-law fronted him the cash and has never asked for repayment. Similar to you, he's felt not guilty persay, but responsible, grateful and indebted to his in-laws for many years. Now that's he very comfortable as upper-middle management at Intel, he recently set aside a large amount of cash to pay for a down payment on a retirement home in America for his sister-in-law's family. Don't feel bad, but remember the kindness. If you're able to do something similar for someone else in the future, don't hesitate.
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Life isn't fair. That's no reason for you to feel bad though.
In fact, not enjoying your privileged situation is like a slap in the face of the less fortunate.
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Honestly, this seems more like a brag blog in disguise.
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On September 21 2014 01:45 Yaqoob wrote:
Honestly, this seems more like a brag blog in disguise.
You jelly?
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Definitely a first world problem lol.
Just don't take it for granted. Take good care of it. Keep it clean. Maintain everything that's under the hood. Don't wreck it. These are ways to show appreciation and responsibility 
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2nd Worst City in CA8938 Posts
Become a person that does deserve such kindness then. That is always the best way to show gratitude - by affirming to the presenter that their investment was not a mistake.
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TLADT24920 Posts
On September 20 2014 21:53 pebble444 wrote:
What you are feeling is guilt that you have something that someone else cannot afford. Let me tell you something right here:
by feeling guilty you are not helping anyone. Just apprecite what you have (which i' m sure you do) and help other people that are less lucky than you.
Use your gift give rides when you can, and just help out others when you can. Feeling guilty won' t help anybody, and won' t make you or anybody else feel better.
this is spot on! Appreciate your position and help others who are less fortunate imo.
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On September 21 2014 05:09 rafaliusz wrote:Show nested quote +On September 21 2014 01:45 Yaqoob wrote:
Honestly, this seems more like a brag blog in disguise. You jelly?
I don't see the point of your post. I'm just posted my honest opinion that it seemed more like a brag blog then a sincere post stating his 'first world problem.
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On September 21 2014 13:49 Yaqoob wrote:Show nested quote +On September 21 2014 05:09 rafaliusz wrote:On September 21 2014 01:45 Yaqoob wrote:
Honestly, this seems more like a brag blog in disguise. You jelly? I don't see the point of your post. I'm just posted my honest opinion that it seemed more like a brag blog then a sincere post stating his 'first world problem.
If the OP wants to brag with his car he just needs to drive around, why would he need tl.net for that? I doubt many people here are jealous 
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Life isn't fair, you are on the better end
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Im jelly, I want a free car too :[
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Canada13407 Posts
she didn't just get you a car.
She also helped you realise some social responsibility.
You feel odd about the situation, and its good to have the car. Use it to do good. Maybe, you can give back to your community with the car. Help some charities get things from one place to another? Give back in some way.
Take the perspective you've gained, and put it into practice somehow.
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I just wanted to type what Zeromus typed. That or if you feel like you don't really deserve it, sell it and use the money to help the government fight the drug cartels or something for scientific research.
It's still nice that you think that you should deserve something in order to get it. I used to be like that. Then life hit me and I realized something I read in the book Mort by Terry Pratchett. Mort was saying to Death "You can't take her! That's not just!". JUSTICE DOESN'T EXIST. ONLY I EXIST. Said Death and swinged his scythe.
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EPT
