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TL;DR Version - Hi guys. Sorry for being a douche. I want to work on my personality and just be an overall, more likeable guy. Take what I have to say with a grain of salt, my apology as genuine, and read the rest of this blog with an objective point of view and I think you'll have the right concept.
Hi guys.
There are a lot of people who I have introduced myself to as a hate-filled mongrol via blogs, and it makes me look like the IdrA of teamliquid blogs. The reasons why I blogged this way are very for simple reasons: I face discrimination from both sides of the spectrum - both in the Western world, and in the realm of Taiwan and China. There were racist situations for me when I wasn't even trying to be a personality and I was in Taiwan / China. I have to fight discrimination, or so I feel. I will be in Korea in two weeks, and I will face discrimination there as well, the best I can do is try to prepare myself for it. However, I think I will try to do something beyond that, I will simply try to beat the discrimination that I face. Being "aggressively nice" as Spongebob once put it.
As for my family blogs... family is family. I wouldn't understand your family just as you wouldn't understand my family. Any time I see someone blog about their family here on teamliquid.net (regardless of the situation), I rate their family blog a 5/5 simply given the fact that there are trolls willing to hate or reflect their jealousy about someone's family.
In other news, I got my visa now. I'm going to Korea.
I think my mother's situation with her cancer has gotten better. She still has her breast and isn't bald at all from her radiation therapy. But honestly... when we think of cancer, when we think of chemotherapy, we think of people sitting next to a nuclear reactor, going bald, getting surgery, becoming amputees, etc... My mother seems, to this point, to defy that stereotype of cancer. Which I find strange.
For those of you who want a more thorough, more clear explanation of why I am apologizing to the community, click on the show spoiler button below.
+ Show Spoiler +I am something a bit rare. A caucasian that speaks Mandarin well to the extent that he can study in a mainland Chinese university. Some of my cerdentials say that I am "fluent", but in reality my reading and writing skills are far better than my spoken Chinese. I do my best to set the stage for globalizing eSports via Chinese-speaking regions and NA regions that need Chinese language support. I use language as my tool for globalization. I run ESLTaiwan on teamliquid and twitch.tv as well. Some big tournaments I've casted are as follows: + Show Spoiler +Ritmix RSL V
ASUS ROG
IEM World Championships
IEM Katowice TW/KR Qualifiers
NeoTV Star League
Asia Starcraft League
WCS EU Season 2 Premier League qualifiers. The reason why I get so angry is because I perceive that I feel discrimination from both hemispheres on the planet. Other white people ask me, "Where did you learn to speak Chinese?" because of course of my Caucasian face. No one on earth would ask Suppy or Xenocider or Hellokittysc2 where they learned to speak "that language" because they are not Caucasian, and thus this situation applies to them far more minutely. And people who speak Chinese as their first language say to me, "Wow, you speak Chinese!?" whenever I try to start a conversation or ask for information that I need (This happens everyhwere, regardless of my geographic location - USA, China, Taiwan, etc.). My university major is Chinese. Altogether, I've spent a year and eight months in Chinese speaking regions of the planet. A lot of the blogs that I've made here on teamliquid.net reflect the anger that I surmised in the above paragraph. Honestly, this short video showcases my entire attitude towards language, skin color, and nationality in the 21st century: So, why do I do what I do? Why do I cast in Chinese and English? I was the guy who casted in English when Nathanias or Khaldor weren't available for the Ritmix Russia Star League V, or the Acer Teamstory Cup. 450 people were happy watching Bomber, MMA, and so on in butchered Chinese from a non-native speaker with a Taiwanese / Southern Min Accent, while another 2,800 native English speakers were happy watching me cast the Final Best of Five between Scarlett and Life in the Ritmix RSL V. I am also just one of a handful of people that can cast from observer positions in Chinese language. Most streams in China are illicit and capitalize on restreaming MLG / WCS NA/ WCS EU / WCS KR streams to the site fengyunzhibo.com.
  
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Uh, it's not discrimination. It's odds. They're not discriminating against you, wtf?
"I am something a bit rare. A caucasian that speaks Mandarin somewhat fluently."
Yeah, it's rare, so people are surprised and interested. The fuck is wrong? It's like if you're 5'7 and play in the NBA. People are going to be surprised/interested/amused. Get over yourself.
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On August 08 2013 12:35 -Kaiser- wrote:
Uh, it's not discrimination. It's odds. They're not discriminating against you, wtf?
"I am something a bit rare. A caucasian that speaks Mandarin somewhat fluently."
Yeah, it's rare, so people are surprised and interested. The fuck is wrong? It's like if you're 5'7 and play in the NBA. People are going to be surprised/interested/amused. Get over yourself.
Yes, but when I am on a university campus and people think that I can't speak Chinese in China / Taiwan... come on.
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On August 08 2013 12:47 Enders116 wrote:Show nested quote +On August 08 2013 12:35 -Kaiser- wrote:
Uh, it's not discrimination. It's odds. They're not discriminating against you, wtf?
"I am something a bit rare. A caucasian that speaks Mandarin somewhat fluently."
Yeah, it's rare, so people are surprised and interested. The fuck is wrong? It's like if you're 5'7 and play in the NBA. People are going to be surprised/interested/amused. Get over yourself. Yes, but when I am on a university campus and people think that I can't speak Chinese in China / Taiwan... come on.
Walk up to a random white guy on the street/on your campus and start speaking Chinese. Tell me how many it takes before one of them understands you. What percentage of white people currently in Taiwan do you think speak fluent Mandarin?
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On August 08 2013 12:30 Enders116 wrote:
[spoiler]I am something a bit rare. A caucasian that speaks Mandarin well to the extent that he can study in a mainland Chinese university.
The reason why I get so angry is because I perceive that I feel discrimination from both hemispheres on the planet. Other white people ask me, "Where did you learn to speak Chinese?" because of course of my Caucasian face. No one on earth would ask Suppy or Xenocider or Hellokittysc2 where they learned to speak "that language" because they are not Caucasian
Because it's a reasonable assumption that a Chinese/non-Caucasian who can speak perfect English was BORN in an English speaking country, hence their language being good. However a Caucasian person who speaks another language perfectly is more likely to have learnt that at some point rather than growing up with it.
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I'm in China. I get where you are coming from, but your attitude is all wrong. The Chinese students at your university are a lot less world wise and sophisticated than you are. They have a lot of wrong preconceptions about foreign countries and they have no idea how to treat someone who doesn't fit the standard stereotype (like white dudes don't speak Chinese.) Honestly, they are probably really impressed that you can speak Chinese, and are just paying you a compliment. Next time, try asking something about the person you are talking to to deflect attention away from yourself if you feel embarrassed.
Basically, just rise above it, and find yourself a group of friends who treat you like a normal person (as anyone will who gets to know you a little, the novelty will wear off pretty fast.)
On another note I found this video the other day, ring any bells?
video
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every time i see one of your blogs you always act like people owe you something for being able to speak chinese and cast sc2
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As people already mentioned, people being surprised by a white dude speaking English and asking questions regarding it is not discrimination. It's ridiculous that you even think that at all. It would be discrimination if they shunned you because they assumed you didn't speak Chinese. Imagine yourself running into a Chinese person at your university who spoke English with no accent. Would you be surprised? Would you "discriminate" against them too?
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On August 08 2013 13:19 rauk wrote:
every time i see one of your blogs you always act like people owe you something for being able to speak chinese and cast sc2
I don't think any body owes me anything. Look, let me put it to you this way. Because I am white, whenever people see me on stream they think, "Ok, so how do you know this?" And then I have to tell them, "I Speak Chinese." and imagine people's responses to me simply saying that in my stream chat, and my reactions thereof.
The above paragraph is the whole reason why I am apologizing to the community in this blog right now. I get angry. I get angry because of skeptics. These skeptics insult my university education.
Quantic's CheeseHeadLogic, however, does not have to face that discrimination because although he is a bilingual caster (English / Russian), his Russian heritage never comes in to question because he is a Caucasian.
Does that make sense? 
On August 08 2013 13:28 garbanzo wrote:
As people already mentioned, people being surprised by a white dude speaking English and asking questions regarding it is not discrimination. It's ridiculous that you even think that at all. It would be discrimination if they shunned you because they assumed you didn't speak Chinese. Imagine yourself running into a Chinese person at your university who spoke English with no accent. Would you be surprised? Would you "discriminate" against them too?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWynJkN5HbQ
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your problems are baffling.
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On August 08 2013 13:29 Enders116 wrote:Show nested quote +On August 08 2013 13:28 garbanzo wrote:
As people already mentioned, people being surprised by a white dude speaking English and asking questions regarding it is not discrimination. It's ridiculous that you even think that at all. It would be discrimination if they shunned you because they assumed you didn't speak Chinese. Imagine yourself running into a Chinese person at your university who spoke English with no accent. Would you be surprised? Would you "discriminate" against them too? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWynJkN5HbQ
Yeah, that's still not discrimination. And if you're telling me that's how you act then how can you be angry at people when they do the same thing?
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16698 Posts
Don't take this the wrong way, but I struggle to recall someone I've met who has a thinner skin than you appear to have.
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On August 08 2013 13:36 Empyrean wrote:
Don't take this the wrong way, but I struggle to recall someone I've met who has a thinner skin than you appear to have.
Donno what to say to that. Guess that means I should lighten up.
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16698 Posts
Probably. I don't mean to presume, but you probably won't be so angry.
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On August 08 2013 13:47 Empyrean wrote:
Probably. I don't mean to presume, but you probably won't be so angry.
I legit think you're right.
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learn to not give a fuck ~
life will be so much easier
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Enders blogs always confuse me, because people always get so pissed at him in the comments for reasons I cannot comprehend in the slightest. Maybe they're just reading something between the lines that I'm not, I dunno, but people always seem to get angry at him for some reason.
edit: Okay I'm beginning to comprehend it now. Enders, you are a statistical rarity. Very, very, very few white people speak even a little Chinese, much less do it fluently. You belting out a phrase of perfect Chinese to someone is like hearing Stephen Hawking admit to believing the world is flat. You just don't expect it at all.
When people express surprise at you speaking Chinese, they are simply recognizing the rarity of a Chinese-speaking Caucasian. They aren't wondering if you're secretly Asian, they aren't implying you're retarded for not learning a more common language and they aren't secretly scheming to deny you opportunities in eSPORTS/business/real estate.
If anything, the process that is occurring in their heads is closer to a complement than an insult. Chinese isn't an easy language to learn if you started out with one of the standard Caucasian languages. It takes a lot of effort and smarts to be able to pull it off.
There are a lot of people who I have introduced myself to as a hate-filled mongrol via blogs
Probably not appropriate timing, but it's mongrel.
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The reason why I get so angry is because I perceive that I feel discrimination from both hemispheres on the planet. Other white people ask me, "Where did you learn to speak Chinese?" because of course of my Caucasian face.
You are using the word discrimination but I think the word you want is curiosity?
Or maybe interest.
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seriously dude, you need to take a breather and stop seeking validation on the internet.
ps: we get that you can cast in chinese
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I have to agree with what a lot of people have already said. If you were, say, an acquaintance of mine, and I heard you speaking Chinese, the conversation'd probably go like this.
"What was that you were speaking?"
"Chinese."
"Holy shit, you speak Chinese?"
"Yes."
"Like, fluently?"
"Yes."
"Wow."
That seems discriminatory to you based on what I've read, but in reality, it's me showing genuine interest and curiosity, and also being quite impressed. It's like...what would you say if a friend of yours suddenly busted out awesome breakdancing moves, and you were all "Holy shit, dude, you can breakdance!?" and he then proceeded to tell you that you were discriminating against him by being surprised he knew how to breakdance. But you're not discriminating against him at all, you're impressed at his unusual skill and talent.
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WCS
