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The following is not meant to be an astute observation, but rather an imperfect inference from the media I've had the misfortune, or rather, when considering the knowledge and insight gained, the fortune to be exposed to.
Right. What I've see in my head now is the average teen as makers of media would have teens see themselves. Here is a person in vintage 'alternative' fashion clothing, which actually looks quite tasteful. However, the old adage must not be forgotten - do not judge a book by it's cover. As sophisticated and refined and dignified the conventional hipster clothing may make the person seem to be, the person is often not so in real life. But in the world of fiction, in the head of the teen whose diet comprises of the predominant media of the century, the person in the clothes is all of that.
The average teen cares for the classics - the written, composed, and painted and drawn art. They can, with ease, describe the symphony of words that makes a mellow prose. But it does not end there, they can, with ease as well, describe the feelings that music evokes, and the images it invokes. With the visual arts that are not just (not just in reality, but so much more) words on paper, they can again, with ease, describe the buttery strokes and meticulous hatching. It would appear that they've all achieved degrees in the liberal arts and now work in fast-food chains and the diarrhoea dispensary Starbucks for 'experience'.
There is one thing in particular about them that really gets to me. They are all perfect in that they are perfectly in tune with their feelings and whatever thoughts and emotions that entails being a human being. The character always knows how he or she feels, and what has to be done next, and how to act based upon his or her emotions. There is not enough, and almost no mention of the time where you do not feel anything, where you have to stop trying to make sense of everything and just let everything go and inundate you, there is none of that. Does the story ever end with the protagonist just forgets the problem and just let things flow?
Right. What I'm thinking now is how this has something to do with anything. Quod me nutrit, me destruit. What nourishes me, also destroys me. It doesn't destroy me in the obliteration sort of sense, but the way muscle is built sort of sense. As pompous as everything that precedes this sentence may seem, I'd like to carry on. But first, I'd like to acknowledge that it may be pretentious, but realize that I am a teenager. I am a teenager who obviously holds revolutionary ideas that people like you, people who are not, do not understand. You people who are not teens will see how right I am in the end, that my opinions are indeed revolutionary in the American revolution sort of sense. One day, society that is made up of old cogs like the people who are not, they will see why my opinions are good and why it is good for me to voice them.
+ Show Spoiler + I was trying to be serious, and I think I succeeded until the last paragraph. I'm not entirely sure what I was going for there. I think that despite me, the 'narrator', being a hypocrite, being an average teen and all, what I've written still holds some truth. The hypocrisy and the lousily precocious characters all ring true
Now, allow me to re-vomit the last paragraph out. What the poor character development does is that it enables the youth of today to continue being the youths of tomorrow. I know people who are so involved with believing the idea that they are where it all ends. Their knowledge is all there is, and there is nothing more. It's crazy how this is! They become exposed to such degrading forms of media at a certain age, say 17, and then they become too comfortable with what they know. When they become too comfortable, it's not because they think "there will always be more, so I don't need to try and know everything", but because they think "there is nothing more". As such, I think that all this is why we see average teens as they are today, when they can easily be so much more.
 
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Ooh, one of those new-fangled satire blogs. 5/5.
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I dunno, I just can't bring myself to like this very much. I know you point out its pretentiously written and all that, but I mean that doesn't make it better or anything. Every blog doesn't have to be chock-full of meaning or anything, though. You have to just write stuff down sometimes.
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Gotta say I'm happy hipsters aren't as rampant where I live... I mean I'd very much rather an honest philistine than a disingenuous, pretentious, self-important, abject poser. But yeah. description is pretty accurate etc etc.
On January 26 2013 02:12 marttorn wrote:
I dunno, I just can't bring myself to like this very much. I know you point out its pretentiously written and all that, but I mean that doesn't make it better or anything. Every blog doesn't have to be chock-full of meaning or anything, though. You have to just write stuff down sometimes.
Also this here ^.
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Congrats on (possibly on purpose) reminding everyone why their hatred of hipsters is justified
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On January 26 2013 01:22 Azera wrote:There is not enough, and almost no mention of the time where you do not feel anything, where you have to stop trying to make sense of everything and just let everything go and inundate you, there is none of that.
This is the only thought in your piece that rings true to me. There is a fear of silence and stillness. Must be entertained 24/7, from waking til sleep, or else something is wrong. You see it in shows as well... they have to be packed every second with either action, forced humor, sex or advertisements. There's no lull in which to pause and reflect. I am certainly infected by this most of the time. It is seductive to be always stimulated and entertained, so as not to face the emptiness and unanswerable questions when alone with thoughts. Starting to believe "idle hands are the tools of the devil" more.
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While I understand this is satire, it's quite odd reading it from the perspective of a writer talking about his own generation and peers, since it's hard to assess whether or not you can truly comprehend the contrast between current teenagers and how teenagers were ten, twenty, and even thirty years ago. After all, you're still a teenager. You still want to be edgy, which is why you wrote this blog, and you're still looking for your own niche, which is why you wrote diarrhea the other way (diarrhoea). Who does that? Once you hit twenty, you'll surely remove the o.
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On January 26 2013 03:05 Mothra wrote:Show nested quote +On January 26 2013 01:22 Azera wrote:There is not enough, and almost no mention of the time where you do not feel anything, where you have to stop trying to make sense of everything and just let everything go and inundate you, there is none of that.
This is the only thought in your piece that rings true to me. There is a fear of silence and stillness.
Have a baby.
Fear conquered.
You're welcome.
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I recommend Good Will Hunting.
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On January 26 2013 03:08 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
While I understand this is satire, it's quite odd reading it from the perspective of a writer talking about his own generation and peers, since it's hard to assess whether or not you can truly comprehend the contrast between current teenagers and how teenagers were ten, twenty, and even thirty years ago. After all, you're still a teenager. You still want to be edgy, which is why you wrote this blog, and you're still looking for your own niche, which is why you wrote diarrhea the other way (diarrhoea). Who does that? Once you hit twenty, you'll surely remove the o.
It doesn't read like flat out satire to me. More like Baudelaire. A mix of bile and ennui.
Also, I Googled Baudelaire to get his name right and my god does that guy look like Gollum.
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On January 26 2013 04:25 Treehead wrote:Show nested quote +On January 26 2013 03:05 Mothra wrote:On January 26 2013 01:22 Azera wrote:There is not enough, and almost no mention of the time where you do not feel anything, where you have to stop trying to make sense of everything and just let everything go and inundate you, there is none of that.
This is the only thought in your piece that rings true to me. There is a fear of silence and stillness. Have a baby. Fear conquered. You're welcome.
Makes zero sense.
Maybe I'm missing joke.
Thanks much.
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On January 26 2013 05:10 Mothra wrote:Show nested quote +On January 26 2013 04:25 Treehead wrote:On January 26 2013 03:05 Mothra wrote:On January 26 2013 01:22 Azera wrote:There is not enough, and almost no mention of the time where you do not feel anything, where you have to stop trying to make sense of everything and just let everything go and inundate you, there is none of that.
This is the only thought in your piece that rings true to me. There is a fear of silence and stillness. Have a baby. Fear conquered. You're welcome. Makes zero sense. Maybe I'm missing joke. Thanks much.
Have a baby - > noise all the time
noise all the time - > desire for quiet time
desire for quiet time - > fear of quiet time subdued.
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United States22883 Posts
This blog is more pretentious than the people you're describing. At least you recognize the hypocrisy, but it still doesn't fix the poor sentence structure. >.>
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On January 26 2013 05:38 Jibba wrote:
This blog is more pretentious than the people you're describing. At least you recognize the hypocrisy, but it still doesn't fix the poor sentence structure. >.>
lol!
EDIT: also, is it pretentious, I can't see why. I'm not good at spotting this kind of thing. Please tell me x
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On January 26 2013 02:12 marttorn wrote:
I dunno, I just can't bring myself to like this very much. I know you point out its pretentiously written and all that, but I mean that doesn't make it better or anything. Every blog doesn't have to be chock-full of meaning or anything, though. You have to just write stuff down sometimes.
Yeah I wrote this the way I thought how the book 'The Fault in our Stars' was written. I still can't get over how horrible it was. The prose is definitely terrible.
On January 26 2013 03:08 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
While I understand this is satire, it's quite odd reading it from the perspective of a writer talking about his own generation and peers, since it's hard to assess whether or not you can truly comprehend the contrast between current teenagers and how teenagers were ten, twenty, and even thirty years ago. After all, you're still a teenager. You still want to be edgy, which is why you wrote this blog, and you're still looking for your own niche, which is why you wrote diarrhea the other way (diarrhoea). Who does that? Once you hit twenty, you'll surely remove the o.
I'm not exactly sure why I wrote this blog, I think it was because I wanted to try and write something that was intentionally terrible that reflects how most hipsters write. Also, diarrhoea is the British spelling. I also spell color as colour.
On January 26 2013 05:10 Deleuze wrote:Show nested quote +On January 26 2013 03:08 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
While I understand this is satire, it's quite odd reading it from the perspective of a writer talking about his own generation and peers, since it's hard to assess whether or not you can truly comprehend the contrast between current teenagers and how teenagers were ten, twenty, and even thirty years ago. After all, you're still a teenager. You still want to be edgy, which is why you wrote this blog, and you're still looking for your own niche, which is why you wrote diarrhea the other way (diarrhoea). Who does that? Once you hit twenty, you'll surely remove the o. It doesn't read like flat out satire to me. More like Baudelaire. A mix of bile and ennui. Also, I Googled Baudelaire to get his name right and my god does that guy look like Gollum.
You bet, it was midnight or so when I wrote it. I didn't want to sleep, so I farted that out.
On January 26 2013 05:38 Jibba wrote:
This blog is more pretentious than the people you're describing. At least you recognize the hypocrisy, but it still doesn't fix the poor sentence structure. >.>
I'm not trying to make any excuses, but the poor prose was intentional. Although, it may have gotten out of hand given that I wrote this very late at night.
On January 26 2013 05:39 Deleuze wrote:Show nested quote +On January 26 2013 05:38 Jibba wrote:
This blog is more pretentious than the people you're describing. At least you recognize the hypocrisy, but it still doesn't fix the poor sentence structure. >.> lol! EDIT: also, is it pretentious, I can't see why. I'm not good at spotting this kind of thing. Please tell me x
I think what makes something is pretentious in this case is the air of grandeur that the author seems to give off. He writes about his peers in a degrading manner and implies that the is better than the rest of them. But, the author does not realize (on purpose or otherwise) that he is exactly like his peers. So I guess you can say that in real life, there is accidental and forced pompousness.
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United States163 Posts
All of these sarcastic blogs make me cringe when I read them. If you write something that doesn't make me cringe, perhaps I'll tell you my best story about when I threw up. See how you like it.
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Baa?21244 Posts
The danger with writing "satire" blogs is that it gives you a shield that you can hide behind, even if that was not your original intention.
Just because it's a satire doesn't mean that it's immune to criticism. You can't deflect everything with "I meant it to be bad, that's the point! Get it?!"
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On January 26 2013 12:10 Carnivorous Sheep wrote:
The danger with writing "satire" blogs is that it gives you a shield that you can hide behind, even if that was not your original intention.
Just because it's a satire doesn't mean that it's immune to criticism. You can't deflect everything with "I meant it to be bad, that's the point! Get it?!"
Yeah I definitely know what you mean. It's like that guy who posted his shit poetry the other time with the whole "ITS POETRY ITS MY EXPRESSION U CANT TELL ME IM WRONG ITS FREE VERSE ITS MEANINGFUL TO ME" business, right?
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FuDDx
United States5014 Posts
What did I just ...
.....
Nothing personal but teenagers when I was a teenager would totally kick your teenage ass... just saying.
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On January 26 2013 09:40 Azera wrote:Show nested quote +On January 26 2013 05:39 Deleuze wrote:On January 26 2013 05:38 Jibba wrote:
This blog is more pretentious than the people you're describing. At least you recognize the hypocrisy, but it still doesn't fix the poor sentence structure. >.> lol! EDIT: also, is it pretentious, I can't see why. I'm not good at spotting this kind of thing. Please tell me x I think what makes something is pretentious in this case is the air of grandeur that the author seems to give off. He writes about his peers in a degrading manner and implies that the is better than the rest of them. But, the author does not realize (on purpose or otherwise) that he is exactly like his peers. So I guess you can say that in real life, there is accidental and forced pompousness.
Ah, OK. So it's like a dramatic monologue. I'm not so good at spotting these kinds of things as I tend to take things at face value.
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Either this was written very poorly in such that so much has been written over so little ideas or the writer knew it was going to be terrible and decided to go all out on the "our generation is best generation". Regardless, judging from the responses, it's clear the writer didn't communicate well, satire or not.
Example: but rather an imperfect inference from the media I've had the misfortune, or rather, when considering the knowledge and insight gained, the fortune to be exposed to
All could be summed up into "but rather what I've seen from the media" or if you want to make it sound less dull (which it is) "from what the media portrays to a population that cannot escape its influence". There's only two events in life you'll write in such way: SAT Essay tests and college applications. After that, your writing should be more grounded into reality...unless you major into philosophy or English.
Maybe you should come back to this topic in a few years or so in your twenties to realize it's a (terrible) satire of your own self in a negative way.
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On January 27 2013 04:12 BirdKiller wrote:
Either this was written very poorly in such that so much has been written over so little ideas or the writer knew it was going to be terrible and decided to go all out on the "our generation is best generation". Regardless, judging from the responses, it's clear the writer didn't communicate well, satire or not.
Maybe you should come back to this topic in a few years or so in your twenties to realize it's a (terrible) satire of your own self in a negative way.
Geez it's not that bad. Sometime it so clearly obvious that please jump on a hate band wagon just as soon as they see someone express a marginally negative opinion.
And it's not a satire it's a dramatic monologue.
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On January 27 2013 04:15 Deleuze wrote:Show nested quote +On January 27 2013 04:12 BirdKiller wrote:
Either this was written very poorly in such that so much has been written over so little ideas or the writer knew it was going to be terrible and decided to go all out on the "our generation is best generation". Regardless, judging from the responses, it's clear the writer didn't communicate well, satire or not.
Maybe you should come back to this topic in a few years or so in your twenties to realize it's a (terrible) satire of your own self in a negative way. Geez it's not that bad. Sometime it so clearly obvious that please jump on a hate band wagon just as soon as they see someone express a marginally negative opinion. And it's not a satire it's a dramatic monologue.
Probably not that bad. Maybe it's just me having read through and reviewed so many of these writings with such style. Helping out a friend and high school teacher, the OP sounded almost exactly like the essays students applying for colleges wrote and made me very cynical of their youth.
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On January 26 2013 15:52 FuDDx wrote:
What did I just ...
.....
Nothing personal but teenagers when I was a teenager would totally kick your teenage ass... just saying.
LOL are you commenting on the actual blog/how it's written or the people it's supposed to represent =P
Yeah I am agreed with deleuze here :|
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On January 27 2013 04:15 Deleuze wrote:Show nested quote +On January 27 2013 04:12 BirdKiller wrote:
Either this was written very poorly in such that so much has been written over so little ideas or the writer knew it was going to be terrible and decided to go all out on the "our generation is best generation". Regardless, judging from the responses, it's clear the writer didn't communicate well, satire or not.
Maybe you should come back to this topic in a few years or so in your twenties to realize it's a (terrible) satire of your own self in a negative way. Geez it's not that bad. Sometime it so clearly obvious that please jump on a hate band wagon just as soon as they see someone express a marginally negative opinion. And it's not a satire it's a dramatic monologue.
Good lord. What the gell is 'sometime it so clearly that please jump on hate band wagon' meant to mean. lol
EDIT: translation:
Sometimes it is so clearly obvious that people jump on a hate band wagon.
And I'm more drunk now that I was earlier. lol
Glad though people managed to get the point!
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These satirical blogs are starting to give me a headache. It's way too masturbatory and self-referential. I mean, I get that some blogs are bad. But how does it help to add MORE blogs talking about how bad they are? Anyone with decent taste knows they're bad, now you've just doubled the frequence because I have to dwell on how bad they are even longer -_-.
Just put up good blogs instead. Lead by example.
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Satire is more than just saying the opposite to what is true.
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On January 27 2013 10:42 SamsungStar wrote:
These satirical blogs are starting to give me a headache. It's way too masturbatory and self-referential. I mean, I get that some blogs are bad. But how does it help to add MORE blogs talking about how bad they are? Anyone with decent taste knows they're bad, now you've just doubled the frequence because I have to dwell on how bad they are even longer -_-.
Just put up good blogs instead. Lead by example.
You're just jelly nobody made a satire of your knife fight blog despite so many people calling it ridiculous / fake etc. 
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On January 27 2013 17:15 MasterOfPuppets wrote:Show nested quote +On January 27 2013 10:42 SamsungStar wrote:
These satirical blogs are starting to give me a headache. It's way too masturbatory and self-referential. I mean, I get that some blogs are bad. But how does it help to add MORE blogs talking about how bad they are? Anyone with decent taste knows they're bad, now you've just doubled the frequence because I have to dwell on how bad they are even longer -_-.
Just put up good blogs instead. Lead by example. You're just jelly nobody made a satire of your knife fight blog despite so many people calling it ridiculous / fake etc.
Nah, my knife fight blog was a satire of someone else's blog 
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On January 26 2013 02:12 marttorn wrote:
I dunno, I just can't bring myself to like this very much. I know you point out its pretentiously written and all that, but I mean that doesn't make it better or anything. Every blog doesn't have to be chock-full of meaning or anything, though. You have to just write stuff down sometimes.
lol mattorn continues his ball-busting ways
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every generation: "god the next generation sucks"
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EPT
