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4 years 3 months 13 days and some odd hours minutes and seconds. That's how long I had been dating the person even now after having my heart shattered by her is the person I love more then anything and that I'm in some way destined to be with even if at the current time I'm not. She wants to try dating someone else. Fine that I can understand I've been the only boyfriend she's ever had and I've been screwing up horribly the last few months. I regret it but it's also my fault no ones fault but mine not hers not this new guys mine. I got too content and comfortable, but I know I love her and always will. I feel like this is a test for us. That this "break" as she called it is a way to see if what we had was real or not. Maybe I'm trying to hold on to something that's lost, but I can't even now with my heart shattered and me extremely down thinking about her makes me happy.
I'm an idiot and a hopeless romantic, but I can't help it she just does that to me. It's been 2 days and I've probably gone through thousands of messages between the two of us and I can't help but think what if. I was going to buy a ring and ask her to marry me on new years. Maybe I'm just an idiot but I hope one day she comes back. She promised but promises get broken all the time. I just can't let her go even now. I found a song I wrote my sophomore year of high school before I even knew her and I never knew why I wrote it but now it feels like I was writing it for today 6 years before it happened but I now know the song is for her.
Refrain
Changing times in changing ways
Everything seems so simple in
The bustle of day to day life
Big things become small
Challenges become like chores
Menial and pointless
Refrain
Seeing you and talking to you
Makes everything so much easier
When you're on my mind
Meeting new friends
Losing old ones
You're the only one that matters
Refrain
I will be waiting
For you to be here
After your suffering
That's what's been on my mind and something I've needed to spew out even if no one reads this I feel as if I can partially move on even if Im still waiting for her.
 
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I dated the same girl for three years before she broke up with me when she went away to college. (Ironically, she was a senior in high school when I was a freshman in college).
We ended up getting back together the next summer, and ended up dating again.
It's going to hurt for awhile. Shit, it's going to hurt for a long time. The best thing you can do right now is focus on improving yourself.
There's some old saying that says you have to let the things you love go, and if they don't come back to you, then they were never really yours in the first place.
Or something like that. Have faith that it will all work out.
Edit: Grammerz
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On December 23 2012 17:25 dGHaiL wrote:
I dated the same girl for three years before she broke up with me when she went away to college. (Ironically, she was a senior in high school when I was a freshman in college).
We ended up getting back together the next summer, and ended up dating again.
It's going to hurt for awhile. Shit, it's going to hurt for a long time. The best thing you can do right now is focus on improving yourself.
There's some old saying that says you have to let the things you love go, and if they don't come back to you, then they were never really yours in the first place.
Or something like that. Have faith that it will all work out.
Edit: Grammerz
This is obv best case scenario (and getting married as well haha  ) but obviously if it doesn't work out, then it will take a long time to recover.
I wish you all the best, and if she doesn't feel the same way you do, then there are plenty more fish in the sea
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On December 24 2012 01:11 firehand101 wrote:Show nested quote +On December 23 2012 17:25 dGHaiL wrote:
I dated the same girl for three years before she broke up with me when she went away to college. (Ironically, she was a senior in high school when I was a freshman in college).
We ended up getting back together the next summer, and ended up dating again.
It's going to hurt for awhile. Shit, it's going to hurt for a long time. The best thing you can do right now is focus on improving yourself.
There's some old saying that says you have to let the things you love go, and if they don't come back to you, then they were never really yours in the first place.
Or something like that. Have faith that it will all work out.
Edit: Grammerz This is obv best case scenario (and getting married as well haha ) but obviously if it doesn't work out, then it will take a long time to recover. I wish you all the best, and if she doesn't feel the same way you do, then there are plenty more fish in the sea
According to her she wants to try being with this guy. She's confused and willingly admits that she can't decide between this new guy and me. I love her enough that I feel safe with her trying to be with him since I feel deep down she loves me as much as Iove her and one day well get back together. I think we both just got too comfortable and relaxed and we need a break from each other to realize how much we truly love each other. Or at least that's what I'm trying to tell myself
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Dude nah don't ask her to marry you... Theres like no way that will have a good outcome..
and also, thinking about what could have been will drive you fucking crazy.
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On December 24 2012 02:09 B.I.G. wrote:
Dude nah don't ask her to marry you... Theres like no way that will have a good outcome..
and also, thinking about what could have been will drive you fucking crazy.
I was planning to before all this happened I'm obviously not now. And it's hard to not think about it when the last thing she said was "I don't think this is actually going to work with him, but I have to try out of curiosity and for us. Please wait for me as hard as it is I still l love you and want to be with you. This is just something I have to do." makes it pretty hard to not think about it
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On December 24 2012 03:33 Kyhron wrote:Show nested quote +On December 24 2012 02:09 B.I.G. wrote:
Dude nah don't ask her to marry you... Theres like no way that will have a good outcome..
and also, thinking about what could have been will drive you fucking crazy. I was planning to before all this happened I'm obviously not now. And it's hard to not think about it when the last thing she said was "I don't think this is actually going to work with him, but I have to try out of curiosity and for us. Please wait for me as hard as it is I still l love you and want to be with you. This is just something I have to do." makes it pretty hard to not think about it
Sounds like BS really, you don't need that kind of stuff when you actually love someone. However, whatever it is, focus on yourself. Exercise, play games, party with your pals, do well in studies. After a breakup there is a TON of energy that needs to be focused somewhere else, which is something women excel at and we men suck at, which means we start up nice and a while later we crash like crazy, while women usually live the breakup in the exact opposite manner.
Best of luck, it's probably going to be tough as nails, but make sure to take good care of yourself, engaging in excessive "anything" (girls, drugs, alcohol, games, whatever) can be extremely hurtful. Also try not to do too much self-pitying and self-bashing, you're gonna need whatever self esteem you can muster.
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Oh it sure as hell isn't easy. The thought of the woman you love being with someone else is enough to make anyone go crazy. I'm just saying that for now it's no good to spend your tike thinking of what you could've done differently. Keep your cool man.
And oh yeah, while youre on this break don't go asking questions you can't bear to hear the answers of.
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Breaks are just a way to put you on the backburner while she goes around and blows some other guy she already has lined up. You twist in the wind and wait. That's the worst case scenario. The best case scenario is that it's just a breakup, but women call it a "break" because it's slightly less devastating as a word, but the intent is the same. Soon after is just kind of becomes official.
Thank God she did this to you now, though, considering you were going to ask her to marry you. Looks like you were way off. And from the sounds of it, it sounds like you were going to use it as a trump card, not a testament of a healthy relationship.
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I just need a couple of days to sort my shit. I do honestly feel deep down that we will end up back together and this is one of those things a relationship sometimes needs to be 100% sure you're really meant to be together. It sucks but I need to grit and bear it the best I can. It's just hard when I have few friends and she was by far my best friend. Im not a partyer or anything like that. Hell I barely even game anymore. I'm just going to try to keep my life/schedule the same as much as possible keep trying to be happy
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if you want her back, your best bet is to use this time now to go forward in life and do the things you've always wanted to do. i dunno if youre a student right now, or what hobbies or ambitions you have. but the point is, right now, you've got this HUGE opportunity to go out there and claim life as your own. before the breakup, you probably spent a lot of your time with your gf, and that's good. now that you have this new vacuum in your life, you've got to fill it with something awesome. go out a learn some new shit, martial arts, sports, working out, learning a new language, learn an instrument, pursue your career with networking and internships, whatever you may want. temporarily put aside thoughts of your ex, the breakup, and focus your energy and attention on something else.
basically, improve yourself. make yourself a better person, because this breakup has given you this chance, and you should capitalize on it. use this opportunity to become more awesome, and if this girl is right for you, she'll eventually be drawn back to you. this is the way to get her back, not go begging after her. again, use this opportunity to focus your energy on making yourself more awesome, and if she's the one, she will come back to you.
if she doesn't, then you would have put yourself into a situation where you made the best possible choices. you would have improved yourself, gained a new sense of confidence, and can cope with this loss much more easily, than if you had spent your time thinking about what could have been.
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On December 24 2012 04:43 MountainDewJunkie wrote:
Breaks are just a way to put you on the backburner while she goes around and blows some other guy she already has lined up. You twist in the wind and wait. That's the worst case scenario. The best case scenario is that it's just a breakup, but women call it a "break" because it's slightly less devastating as a word, but the intent is the same. Soon after is just kind of becomes official.
Thank God she did this to you now, though, considering you were going to ask her to marry you. Looks like you were way off. And from the sounds of it, it sounds like you were going to use it as a trump card, not a testament of a healthy relationship.
ouch. kinda have to agree though.
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EPT
