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You having a hard time spending money on things that don't matter (ex. expensive clothing, expensive cars, activities that you don't get a large amount of enjoyment from) is not something that you should try to correct. Rather, it is a necessary component of the most rational course of action in life with regards to money management. The most reasonable thing you can do is save lots and lots of money (though I'm not suggesting you spend so little on yourself that your life becomes miserable) and take an extended period of time to search for the way that the money can be best used. Giving the money to a charity which fights disease in undeveloped countries may be a good idea. This also could help eliminate some of your depression because I know that almost all people say they feel better when they help others (and this has also been shown through studies.)
As for women, if a particular women requires a monthly maintenance fee (so to speak) in order for her to love you, it might not be a good idea for you to be in a long term relationship with her. On second thought, take this advice with a few kilos of salt since I don't have experience in the area.
On August 30 2012 04:08 tissue wrote:If you're still playing poker online, unless you're 32 tabling micros or something, having a healthy mind nourished and recharged by social interaction could pay off.
While this advice is true for extroverts, it isn't true for introverts because for them, social interaction depletes mental energy instead of "recharging" their minds.
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Interesting read. As mentioned, it's not as out of the norm as you would think not to initiate social contact. I find myself doing the same as well a lot of the time. The introvert picture posted by TDL is pretty nice, found it to have quite some truth in it. One way I thought one could consider extroverts vs introverts was that the former's energy level would rise in social situations and the latter would have to expend energy (not literally, just a figure of speech) when in social situations.
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I was and still am a lot like you in several aspects, and I'm seldom the one initiating social contact, although I do it more often recently. The reason for the change would be finding my dear girlfriend about a year ago. Find someone you feel you want to spend money on (relationships certainly isn't about money, but it will sure cost quite some).
And if you value money highly, maybe the girls that wants the expensive brand bags isn't the girls for you. There are plenty of those girls too.
Anyway, maybe set up a simple budget for money to use on "fun things", such as drinking? Might make it feel easier.
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You're rationalizing your fear and inexperience with women with thriftiness. If you can afford $600 headphones, you can suck up 10 bucks for a coffee date.
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Not sure how a 2500$ computer is an investment.
I can't imagine many things that loses value as quickly as technology.
You said you had the money to buy a nice new 2013 car, so that is what? 20-30k? When I worked as a debt collector, I saw people start companies with 1/10th of that.
For someone that seems to aspire wealth and status, why would you not try to start your own company? It is a lot of hard work, eats up tons of hours, pays back what you put in, imparts a huge status.
An investment actually has to make good on its return. Anything you buy for yourself isn't an investment, because you don't buy it with the aim of making a return on it.
That 2500$ computer isn't going to be worth half its value in a year. Hell, I'd argue that it isn't even worth half its value the second you buy it, because people are really uneasy about buying computers.
You seem to clash with your own views. Most people do, but it doesn't really make sense in your case. You had the money, you don't like to spend it on wastefull stuff, and you want status. A company seems like a natural fit. Hell, you can just shrug when people talk about their studies and say that you stopped because you wanted to do something real.
As for women, your arguments don't make any sense.
If you're going 50/50 then you aren't paying more than you would otherwise. You're splitting the bill. If everyone pays for their own movie ticket, nobody is paying a cent more than when they would go alone.
Sounds like a cop-out argument.
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On August 31 2012 04:26 zalz wrote:
Not sure how a 2500$ computer is an investment.
Needed to work.
On August 31 2012 04:26 zalz wrote:You said you had the money to buy a nice new 2013 car, so that is what? 20-30k? When I worked as a debt collector, I saw people start companies with 1/10th of that.
For someone that seems to aspire wealth and status, why would you not try to start your own company? It is a lot of hard work, eats up tons of hours, pays back what you put in, imparts a huge status.
I really am not business savvy in the sense that I just have no idea what I could market and/or sell. And I don't know of anything worth buying in. Well, I didn't. I don't have that money anymore.
On August 31 2012 04:26 zalz wrote:You seem to clash with your own views. Most people do, but it doesn't really make sense in your case. You had the money, you don't like to spend it on wastefull stuff, and you want status. A company seems like a natural fit. Hell, you can just shrug when people talk about their studies and say that you stopped because you wanted to do something real.
Yeah that is true, maybe I should look into that, as I currently have no idea about how to pursue that venue.
On August 31 2012 04:26 zalz wrote:As for women, your arguments don't make any sense.
If you're going 50/50 then you aren't paying more than you would otherwise. You're splitting the bill. If everyone pays for their own movie ticket, nobody is paying a cent more than when they would go alone.
Sounds like a cop-out argument.
Yeah well I never go out, I haven't seen Batman lol! So it's not as if I wouldn't pay more it's a new expense. But yeah, your right, it might be a form of cop-out based on fear/insecurity. I had multiple people tell me that and I do believe there might be some truth to it.
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same boat as you except i spend most of my money on new biking gear, accessories, wetsuits, running shoes, triathlon stuff. Most of the time i just do that by myself with only my parents coming to watch me. I love what I do, i love training, but sometimes it does get lonely. I just sort of tell myself that If i just keep doing what i love even though my interests aren't very social (seriously no one gets excited for 4 hour long endurance workouts except me), that everything will work out together in the end.
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wow ur the same as me. except many years older.
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On August 31 2012 13:36 superbarnie wrote:
wow ur the same as me. except many years older.
lololololol
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On August 30 2012 07:35 Blazinghand wrote:Show nested quote +On August 30 2012 07:13 demMudkipz wrote:On August 30 2012 05:29 ecstatica wrote:
I usually advice to start from getting laid. I know youre incapable right now but even a hooker qualifies. Once youve tried being with a woman you should be able to prioritize more. 80$ for an hour of sex seems like a good investment for you. ^ That is horrible advice. Pick up a shitfaced co-ed at 2am instead. Probably safer too. ^this is also horrible advice. Get into a caring relationship with nice honey you like then slip her the wood. Boning prositutes or unreasonably drunk honeys is not the way to go about it.
I love that you refer to women as "honeys" makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
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Technology/electronics are investments not in the sense that you purchase them in the hope that they will gain value, but in the sense that you are investing money into a device that will help you work and facilitate anything that requires the use of a computer and/or the Internet. $2500 is kind of steep though unless you're looking for a gaming computer or something that can run simulations or something similar. Hardware is moving much faster than is software and your marginal cost will start rising REALLY quickly especially with electronics, and your marginal benefit will start dropping rather quickly too after you pass certain points (though granted for gamers, shelling out more doesn't suffer as much from diminishing returns as one might expect unless you really go for broke in hardware).
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EPT
