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*This is not a troll thread*
*Be warned about explicit detail*
I will be mentioning ways to wipe and some story time for those in need.
This ain't a thread were I am going to just crap all over fat people and make fun of them, its just an interesting concept, I had a talk with a morbidly obese friend of mine about how he wipes and how generally the fat people wipe.
And the fact is this simple that they simply can't reach down to the asscrack, simple as that.
He told me that is actually that is really hard to figure out, and when he was young and without stuff like internet and there aren't many obese people in Iceland to talk to about this kind of stuff, he had to figure it out on his own. What he did was fill several bowls of water
and splash water up his as****** and then finish it by rubbing "it" agains't the edge of toilet seat and wiping the toilet seat of when he was about finished.
What he says he does now is that he uses is what a lot of the fat people he knows uses, a barbecue mop. A lot of people don't wipe and if you do that, DON'T! Its actually really harmful you can get severe infections and sores, leading to (in most cases) the hospital.
Some simply use a garden hose/bathtub/shower/cleaning toilets, basically this part is all about water they just find a way to splash some water up there, Note that this is not enough because you can never get enough off you must dry it off with a mop or something because when the water dries off, little poop particles get stuck to your skin and become harmful.
There are nurses that do this for people also, this is really common that a nurse takes care of everything for you, you have to stand on one leg with your other foot on to something though, to spread your buttcheeks apart.
  
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I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems.
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On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems.
If you take what you classify as obese and narrow it down to the 10% fattest. Yes they can't reach there... And people aren't generally advertising if they have difficulty wiping, a lot of the people he and me talked to said that they were doing fine... Either they are... Or... Lying.
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TL needs a [NSFL] tag :D I puked a little
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Do you realize how unpleasant it's going to be now, to use a public bathroom with the thought of LRM)Game sinisterly wiping his anus against the toilet seat. He claims his arms large enough to handle the situation but I can still see him doing it just to send a big "fuck you" to the skinny's.
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On August 21 2012 11:52 puppykiller wrote:
Do you realize how unpleasant it's going to be now, to use a public bathroom with the thought of LRM)Game sinisterly wiping his anus against the toilet seat. He claims his arms large enough to handle the situation but I can still see him doing it just to send a big "fuck you" to the skinny's.
Wait, skinny people don't do that too?
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On August 21 2012 11:52 MaV_gGSC wrote:
TL needs a [NSFL] tag :D I puked a little
Well I did warn that this thread contained explicit detail.
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What the fuck lol?
Well I guess you learn something every day. I've wondered this as well though.... :S
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had a little ditty about wiping,
and how reaching the crack was a'piping:
got an old friend named joe,
who was quite the heavy fellow,
and his crack was too far,
so he took an old sock,
and lay in his hammock,
his pants slightly ajar.
And when the time came,
his sock without shame,
was placed right beneath his buttocks.
a lesson be learned:
If y'are obese,
y'may wipe with ease
though yer better to use a poopsock.
/meh
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perhaps they could use that european toilet that shoots water up your but to wash it. We have one in my house but it seems to weird to use
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On August 21 2012 12:15 kamkerx wrote:
perhaps they could use that european toilet that shoots water up your but to wash it. We have one in my house but it seems to weird to use
sounds like a Bidet
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On August 21 2012 12:15 kamkerx wrote:
perhaps they could use that european toilet that shoots water up your but to wash it. We have one in my house but it seems to weird to use
That is not a possibility for them I'm afraid, due to lack of squirting power isn't enough to rinse all the crap out. Sure it waters you up and makes you all slick and smooth for further wiping, but all-in-all it isn't enough.
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Not trolling, serious comment. So i'm sure some of u have noticed that really obese people kinda smell, and i've heard thats it from the excess sweat they produce which have bacteria which causes the smell. But could it also be that they dont "completely" wipe clean? Like u were mentioning that they would have to do all kinds of things to reach "it" maybe they just cant be fucked and do the best they can, which would contribute to the smell i mentioned at first.
Also...WTF with wiping their ass on the toilet seat...wtf...i already cover the toilet seats with tissue paper, oh god...tho thankfully i use the staff bathroom when i'm at uni havent noticed any of them to be obese and plus the janitor cleans it everyday...but still i'm never gonna do a toilet in a fast food restaurant after today
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On August 21 2012 12:37 Shock710 wrote:
Not trolling, serious comment. So i'm sure some of u have noticed that really obese people kinda smell, and i've heard thats it from the excess sweat they produce which have bacteria which causes the smell. But could it also be that they dont "completely" wipe clean? Like u were mentioning that they would have to do all kinds of things to reach "it" maybe they just cant be fucked and do the best they can, which would contribute to the smell i mentioned at first.
Know how when you start wiping, and you wipe there is crap on the toilet paper, you do it again, and there is still crap again and again and again, then its finally gone? Imagine that for them, due to the substance that is poop, its really sticky and it gets into every little hole and skin crack etc. It slithers everywhere and its hard to get off. It is perfectly normal that they can't clean more then about 90%. That is most likely why they stink...
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On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute...
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On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute...
Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information.
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You guys have way too much time on your hands.
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On August 21 2012 13:07 3FFA wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute... Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information.
Dammit I'm eating dinner and came back to this thread =___=
Also screw them, I sit and wipe.
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only on TL....
On August 21 2012 13:07 3FFA wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute... Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information.
they probably used leaves.
anyway, who sits down and wipes? you cant be sitting while you wipe, unless your hand and arm are penetrating the toilet bowl. people normally are in a squat or crouched position when they wipe.
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Oh good. I was wondering when people would objectively discuss random things about overweight people to gossip about, much less it be their intensely personal details of how one uses the toilet.
Douche bags.
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On August 21 2012 13:14 ieatkids5 wrote:only on TL.... Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 13:07 3FFA wrote:On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute... Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information. they probably used leaves. anyway, who sits down and wipes? you cant be sitting while you wipe, unless your hand and arm are penetrating the toilet bowl. people normally are in a squat or crouched position when they wipe.
If you really must know, I sort of shift my weight to one side and wipe. Sometimes I sort of get off the seat though I guess o_o
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Shift one buttcheek upwards, put hand under, wipe. That's how I do it. Do people actually get completely up off the toilet seat to wipe (and wouldn't that just cause your cheeks to close and make the mess even messier)?
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On August 21 2012 13:19 TheKwas wrote:
Shift one buttcheek upwards, put hand under, wipe. That's how I do it. Do people actually get completely up off the toilet seat to wipe (and wouldn't that just cause your cheeks to close and make the mess even messier)?
You mean everyone doesnt stand up and bend over to wipe..??
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On August 21 2012 13:12 Aerisky wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 13:07 3FFA wrote:On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute... Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information. Dammit I'm eating dinner and came back to this thread =___= Also screw them, I sit and wipe.
I sit and wipe, i thought everyone did this? isnt it tiring to hold ur body up in that position? Also with them being obese i cant imagine they would tired themselves like that. The only time i wouldnt sit and wipe would be if i couldnt eg: the toilets in China where its basically a basin on the floor and there is no seat and u must crouch to do ur business.
....yeah what aerisky said lift one side enough to fit ur arm through...wtf get up and bend over? isnt that tiresome?
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I just stand up and put toilet paper down by butthole until I feel some on my finger, then I flip it to the other side to use that side, then I get more toilet paper, repeat, repeat, repeat until the last one is basically dry of anything. After every 5 papers I usually flush the toilet so it doesn't clog. Finally, I clean my hands for the standard clean of 1 whole minute.
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Maybe some of them stroke there asshole against the toilet paper wheel. Then they rip off the poop stained toilet paper and throw it away.
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On August 21 2012 13:14 ieatkids5 wrote:only on TL.... Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 13:07 3FFA wrote:On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute... Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information. they probably used leaves. anyway, who sits down and wipes? you cant be sitting while you wipe, unless your hand and arm are penetrating the toilet bowl. people normally are in a squat or crouched position when they wipe.
Simply lean towards the left so that your right ass cheek is exposed and use your right hand to wipe your crack. It's not rocket science dude come on.
Crouching and trying to wipe is more difficult because your ass cheeks are clenched together.
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On August 21 2012 13:54 PaqMan wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 13:14 ieatkids5 wrote:only on TL.... On August 21 2012 13:07 3FFA wrote:On August 21 2012 12:48 Vain wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money. wait what. How the fuck are you pooping if not sitting down? This thread is getting wierder with the minute... Crouch? :o Wait... how did old cavemen do it? And did they wipe?!? Or did they lick it.... hmm.... I shall ponder this until I get a reliable source or two with this information. they probably used leaves. anyway, who sits down and wipes? you cant be sitting while you wipe, unless your hand and arm are penetrating the toilet bowl. people normally are in a squat or crouched position when they wipe. Simply lean towards the left so that your right ass cheek is exposed and use your right hand to wipe your crack. It's not rocket science dude come on. Crouching and trying to wipe is more difficult because your ass cheeks are clenched together.
Just a question of habit. I never sit down on public toilets and never had clenching problems tbh. My experience is quite the opposite actually, when i sit down using the toilet takes like three times as long because i can't use my pelvis muscles properly. I think that is also the reason why women are usually a lot faster than men on the toilet, cause crouching is more common.
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I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do.
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People actually stand and wipe O_O?
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On August 21 2012 14:45 Megaliskuu wrote:
I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do.
Honestly, you can tell who didn't have a strong father influence by this in my experience. It's a random question I ask people in real life if I'm interrogating them for my own personal interest. Most whom sit were raised solely by their mother.
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I thought mr bimbles would like my poem, i'll just go away 
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On August 21 2012 15:01 Game wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 14:45 Megaliskuu wrote:
I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do. Honestly, you can tell who didn't have a strong father influence by this in my experience. It's a random question I ask people in real life if I'm interrogating them for my own personal interest. Most whom sit were raised solely by their mother.
I sit, and didn't realize people stood O.o However, I was raised mostly by my dad... So I guess in my case your general statement is incorrect.
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On August 21 2012 15:23 Roe wrote:I thought mr bimbles would like my poem, i'll just go away
It was a good poem, it's just the direction of the conversation in the other replies was funny and more captivating I think.
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On August 21 2012 15:27 Rollin wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 15:23 Roe wrote:I thought mr bimbles would like my poem, i'll just go away It was a good poem, it's just the direction of the conversation in the other replies was funny and more captivating I think.
Your name is too perfect for this thread.
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Another pro crouching point: If you are used to using toilets without sitting, all toilets are basicly the same. No toilet scares me as long as there is TP. This grants me more freedom than your average sitter.
The only situation where it sucks taking a dump this way is while wearing ski boots as the ski boots dont allow you do put your knees forward enough and the crouch is kinda uncomfortable.
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On a related note, how do obese people vomit?
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On August 21 2012 16:25 Shady Sands wrote:On a related note, how do obese people vomit?
 Sitting down, obviously.
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On August 21 2012 15:39 aqui wrote:
Another pro crouching point: If you are used to using toilets without sitting, all toilets are basicly the same. No toilet scares me as long as there is TP. This grants me more freedom than your average sitter.
The only situation where it sucks taking a dump this way is while wearing ski boots as the ski boots dont allow you do put your knees forward enough and the crouch is kinda uncomfortable.
I just cover the toilet seat with toilet paper if I'm at a public toilet and I'm good to poo.^^
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On August 21 2012 13:20 Gunther wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 13:19 TheKwas wrote:
Shift one buttcheek upwards, put hand under, wipe. That's how I do it. Do people actually get completely up off the toilet seat to wipe (and wouldn't that just cause your cheeks to close and make the mess even messier)? You mean everyone doesnt stand up and bend over to wipe..??
well i'm pretty sure most people stay seated down and wipe. cause if you stand up (as was mentioned) your cheeks kinda close up so it's harder to get in there with your toilet paper (could be wrong but that's how i feel it is)
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I feel like you have to be pretty fucking obese to not be able to reach your own anus. I mean, I'm technically obese (thought certainly on the lower end of the spectrum, I weigh about 15kg too much for my height, but I'm really tall), but even if I was twice as big or even more, I'd have zero issues.
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On August 21 2012 14:45 Megaliskuu wrote:
I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do.
What is the best way to do it? Just curious... Because Lol I do it sitting, is that the best way?
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On August 21 2012 15:23 Roe wrote:I thought mr bimbles would like my poem, i'll just go away
Ohhh noes, don't go! I love Poopysocks!
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When I goto the public restroom I let it rip. Then if there's anyone there I'll stare them down and make it as awkward as possible.
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On August 21 2012 23:08 Snuggles wrote:
When I goto the public restroom I let it rip. Then if there's anyone there I'll stare them down and make it as awkward as possible.
Whut why?
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On August 21 2012 23:08 Snuggles wrote:
When I goto the public restroom I let it rip. Then if there's anyone there I'll stare them down and make it as awkward as possible.
Methinks he's trolling, although anyone would be proud of using their defecating abilities to engage in sociopathic behavior is beyond me
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My wife stands to wipe. I will make sure our children sit to wipe like normal people.
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On August 21 2012 20:47 Mr.Bimbles wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 14:45 Megaliskuu wrote:
I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do. What is the best way to do it? Just curious... Because Lol I do it sitting, is that the best way?
People standwipe? :D
Is that even.... practical?
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On August 22 2012 01:27 Zealos wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 20:47 Mr.Bimbles wrote:On August 21 2012 14:45 Megaliskuu wrote:
I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do. What is the best way to do it? Just curious... Because Lol I do it sitting, is that the best way? People standwipe? :D Is that even.... practical?
Should we do a poll?
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Am I the only one who pulls his pants partially down, and then tucks his dick behind the rim of his underwear/pants so that it points directly towards the water?
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On August 22 2012 01:46 Shady Sands wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2012 01:27 Zealos wrote:On August 21 2012 20:47 Mr.Bimbles wrote:On August 21 2012 14:45 Megaliskuu wrote:
I feel enlightened by this thread.
EDIT: LOL Standing up wiping vs sitting down wiping these are always good, love to watch as people learn for the first time that people do the opposite of what they do. What is the best way to do it? Just curious... Because Lol I do it sitting, is that the best way? People standwipe? :D Is that even.... practical? Should we do a poll?
This definitely needs a poll. My world view just changed.
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Most important poll in TL history,
Poll: HOW DO YOU WIPE?Sitting (80) 61% Standing (51) 39% 131 total votes Your vote: HOW DO YOU WIPE? (Vote): Sitting
(Vote): Standing
Lol I clicked wrong one..+1 for standing.
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On August 22 2012 03:17 Megaliskuu wrote:Most important poll in TL history, Poll: HOW DO YOU WIPE?Sitting (80) 61% Standing (51) 39% 131 total votes Your vote: HOW DO YOU WIPE? (Vote): Sitting
(Vote): Standing
Lol I clicked wrong one..+1 for standing.
Forgot the one for squatting. Best of both worlds.
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On August 22 2012 03:28 PanN wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2012 03:17 Megaliskuu wrote:Most important poll in TL history, Poll: HOW DO YOU WIPE?Sitting (80) 61% Standing (51) 39% 131 total votes Your vote: HOW DO YOU WIPE? (Vote): Sitting
(Vote): Standing
Lol I clicked wrong one..+1 for standing. Forgot the one for squatting. Best of both worlds.
Where's the "I don't wipe" option?
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On August 22 2012 03:17 Megaliskuu wrote:Most important poll in TL history, Poll: HOW DO YOU WIPE?Sitting (80) 61% Standing (51) 39% 131 total votes Your vote: HOW DO YOU WIPE? (Vote): Sitting
(Vote): Standing
Lol I clicked wrong one..+1 for standing.
No barehand option?
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I do the half stand, half sit wipe. You know, where you're sort of leaning to one side.
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On August 22 2012 06:48 krndandaman wrote:
wow If I was even remotely unable to wipe my own anus because of being too obese I would probably fast for the next week or so. that is just depressing.
lol.
Wonder how a fat guy feels when he can't even reach around to jack off any longer?
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Russian Federation748 Posts
I had no idea some people did that in a sitting position.
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discussions here about pooping habits usually revolve around folding vs. balling up of TP.
I never knew there were stand-up wipers...
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Just to clarify, when you say "standing" you mean that you are squatting down and bending over but not touching the toilet bowl, correct? cuz if you stand straight up to wipe, it closes up your asscheeks and makes it harder. that's what i meant when i said i stand to wipe. i lift my ass off the toilet bowl, but only a little bit, bend forward and squat so that my asscheeks are still spread.
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294 Posts
Why would you stand up to wipe? It has the same effect as shifting to the side but with the added rigor of a semi-squat exercise.
And why would you ball up TP? You can only use it once and it's a horrible waste of surface area.
:/
I assume most people, regardless of obesity, can do just fine wiping in a normal fashion. But for those morbidly obese, I would guess they have a special tool they could put in their pocket and use whenever they need. Not that big a deal imo.
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Some people even stand up, while staying with an arched back (bent over so their ass cheeks don't close on each other) and wipe from behind like that.
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On August 22 2012 06:57 Roe wrote:
I do the half stand, half sit wipe. You know, where you're sort of leaning to one side.
Isnt that pretty much the reason people vote different? You're sort of leaning to a side and putting some/all weight on your feet (like when standing) instead of on your butt/thighs (like when sitting). But you're not exactly standing straight up either and you're still kinda leaning onto the toilet seat for stability. So some call the same position standing, some call it sitting?
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When i put sitting down(in the poll), i'm in the meaning or tilting to one side as ur still "sitting on the seat" only with like one cheek but its like bending over and standing up completely when i took to mean "standing" in the poll.
Also folded tissue paper for me, feels like u have more control of where the tissue starts and ends, unlike with a balled up one where ur fingers would be around it and u like misjudge how much the paper covers ur fingers.
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On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems.
I know that's an early post in this thread but I'm surprised that you have in depth knowledge of the wiping methods of 100 obese people and your mother.
I call BS.
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I think crouching and standing are the same category?
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On August 23 2012 00:14 Djzapz wrote:Show nested quote +On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems. I know that's an early post in this thread but I'm surprised that you have in depth knowledge of the wiping methods of 100 obese people and your mother. I call BS.
Granted hockey locker rooms aren't as flamboyant and you're Canadian, I'd guess you haven't played sports for the majority of your life and thus don't truly understand the dynamic social aspect of them.
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Hockey locker rooms are pretty flamboyant, just good luck getting morbidly obese people to skate
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On August 23 2012 11:44 TheKwas wrote:
Hockey locker rooms are pretty flamboyant, just good luck getting morbidly obese people to skate
Well even obese people gotta skate
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I assume it's just a misunderstanding of both terms, literally standing, as in both legs, straight up, in order to wipe makes no sense whatsoever. Your buttcheeks gonna close.
I can only think of choosing to enter a room through a narrowly cracked door instead of a fully opening it first.
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On August 23 2012 17:44 Shady Sands wrote:Show nested quote +On August 23 2012 11:44 TheKwas wrote:
Hockey locker rooms are pretty flamboyant, just good luck getting morbidly obese people to skate Well even obese people gotta skate
lol did not see that coming
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Blazinghand
United States25550 Posts
On August 23 2012 10:03 Game wrote:Show nested quote +On August 23 2012 00:14 Djzapz wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems. I know that's an early post in this thread but I'm surprised that you have in depth knowledge of the wiping methods of 100 obese people and your mother. I call BS. Granted hockey locker rooms aren't as flamboyant and you're Canadian, I'd guess you haven't played sports for the majority of your life and thus don't truly understand the dynamic social aspect of them.
I can definitely corroborate the claim that in sports locker rooms, you WILL have conversations about how you (morbidly obese or not) wipe your ass. This is a typical locker room conversation topic.
Edit: FUCK ARE YOI SERIOUS THIS IS NOT WHAT I PLANNED FOR POST 8000
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well ain't that just shitty
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On August 24 2012 01:38 Blazinghand wrote:Show nested quote +On August 23 2012 10:03 Game wrote:On August 23 2012 00:14 Djzapz wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems. I know that's an early post in this thread but I'm surprised that you have in depth knowledge of the wiping methods of 100 obese people and your mother. I call BS. Granted hockey locker rooms aren't as flamboyant and you're Canadian, I'd guess you haven't played sports for the majority of your life and thus don't truly understand the dynamic social aspect of them. I can definitely corroborate the claim that in sports locker rooms, you WILL have conversations about how you (morbidly obese or not) wipe your ass. This is a typical locker room conversation topic. Edit: FUCK ARE YOI SERIOUS THIS IS NOT WHAT I PLANNED FOR POST 8000
Making a post about wiping your ass for your 8000th post is totally worth it!
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Ok I'm not gonna lie. I've been wiping my ass standing up. I don't remember getting proper training so I probably developed through habit and the thought that there's not much space to work with just maneuvering you whole hand underneath your butt while you sit.
But after reading this blog and people questioning if there were really people standing up wiping their ass, I decided to try sitting down, shifting my weight on one butt cheek, and wiping.
Holy shit.
My whole life has been a lie. Not only cleaner wipes when sitting down but less toilet paper, and also the distance to reaching my butthole while sitting is shorter, making it more comfortable to me. Thank you guys.
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Blazinghand
United States25550 Posts
The big thing is that as you stand up, the angel between your torso and your upper leg extends, compressing your butt and making cleaning more difficult. It also makes it harder to reach. Basic poop-wiping 101 now you know
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On August 24 2012 06:13 Blazinghand wrote:
The big thing is that as you stand up, the angel between your torso and your upper leg extends, compressing your butt and making cleaning more difficult. It also makes it harder to reach. Basic poop-wiping 101 now you know
Wow cool story bro, you clearly took crap taking analysis 101.
No sarcasm though, that clears things pretty much up.
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Never before have I read a thread that made me laugh, want to puke, and where I learned something new (people wipe standing up wtf?) all at the same time.
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On August 23 2012 10:03 Game wrote:Show nested quote +On August 23 2012 00:14 Djzapz wrote:On August 21 2012 11:44 Game wrote:
I'm 6'7 350, which is obese despite having shoulders twice as broad as my torso, and I wipe just fine. Having played sports with at least 100 obese people, I can also say none of them have ever had a problem wiping. My mother is morbidly obese and wipes like a normal person as well.
I'm assuming you mean males, because it's not socially acceptable for them to sit down and wipe. However, I must say, those little Mexican sized toilet stalls can be a difficulty. You know the ones I'm talking about, where the toilet seat is actually only like 20 inches off the ground, and the walls are compact so you feel half like a sardine in a can of sardines, and half like clothing when you try to compact a box to ship it for less money.
Are Icelandic people some morph of the human race where their arms aren't long enough (ironically, like a Mexican) to function like a normal human being? I've seen people like that and often wondered myself, but in my experience with formidably obese American football linemen and a few outside of sports, absolutely no problems. I know that's an early post in this thread but I'm surprised that you have in depth knowledge of the wiping methods of 100 obese people and your mother. I call BS. Granted hockey locker rooms aren't as flamboyant and you're Canadian, I'd guess you haven't played sports for the majority of your life and thus don't truly understand the dynamic social aspect of them.
I don't recall people dropping shits and wiping publicly in lockers, I'll admit.
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I think this thread may have had a life long impact on me, go figure.
Time to youtube "the best way to wipe".. ew
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I never sit when I'm doing my business. I pee standing up and I go #2 by leaning over the toilet with my butt a few inches above the toilet seat. I never feel like sitting because I have to push my junk around under the toilet seat and it can be quite uncomfortable (not to mention it's difficult for me to have urinary or bowel movements in a sitting position). Standing up or squatting is the way to go, because it's less messy and saves time. In addition, it works out my thigh and calf muscles.
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I will leave this knowledge here in that someone may find this thread and eventually use it if they need it. Maybe even the OP will find it and put it in his post.
I am severly overweight, about 380lbs right now, and I have devised my own system out of necessity, because hygiene is paramount. While my system requires only 2 things, it is only partially portable and is best served if you "go" only at home.
First, I installed a 7 setting hand shower attachment to my regular shower. (requires nothing more than a T valve and some pipe thread tape)
Perform the following while standing up, but squatting in the shower. Reach around your back from the outside (not between your legs under) and BE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD SHOWER MAT or you will fall over.
Use the single center jet to wash away any remaining residue.
Then semi wrap a thick wet washcloth corner to corner across the shaft of a Craftsman 4 x 8 Phillips screwdriver.
Use this to scrub away any remainign debris. Use a small amount of mild soap or bodywash.
Change the showerhead to the outerring only, still having pressure. Rinse area completely.
Important: Post cleaning, you must dry properly or you will still eventually smell.
You can either dry with a thin clean dry wash cloth, or a full size sheet papertowel, again wrapped around the screwdriver metal shaft.
Place some menthol cooling body powder in your underwear to stay dry and sweat free.
If you must travel, you can use only the screwdriver method, although it takes a few more attempts to become completely clean.
also traveling with a crewdriver looks far less incriminating, than one of the bottom buddy things which looks like you stole it from the space shuttle.
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On July 27 2013 14:36 singlepost wrote:
I will leave this knowledge here in that someone may find this thread and eventually use it if they need it. Maybe even the OP will find it and put it in his post.
I am severly overweight, about 380lbs right now, and I have devised my own system out of necessity, because hygiene is paramount. While my system requires only 2 things, it is only partially portable and is best served if you "go" only at home.
First, I installed a 7 setting hand shower attachment to my regular shower. (requires nothing more than a T valve and some pipe thread tape)
Perform the following while standing up, but squatting in the shower. Reach around your back from the outside (not between your legs under) and BE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD SHOWER MAT or you will fall over.
Use the single center jet to wash away any remaining residue.
Then semi wrap a thick wet washcloth corner to corner across the shaft of a Craftsman 4 x 8 Phillips screwdriver.
Use this to scrub away any remainign debris. Use a small amount of mild soap or bodywash.
Change the showerhead to the outerring only, still having pressure. Rinse area completely.
Important: Post cleaning, you must dry properly or you will still eventually smell.
You can either dry with a thin clean dry wash cloth, or a full size sheet papertowel, again wrapped around the screwdriver metal shaft.
Place some menthol cooling body powder in your underwear to stay dry and sweat free.
If you must travel, you can use only the screwdriver method, although it takes a few more attempts to become completely clean.
also traveling with a crewdriver looks far less incriminating, than one of the bottom buddy things which looks like you stole it from the space shuttle.
That made me throw up a little bit. I wonder what you searched to get to this thread on a gaming website...
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On July 27 2013 15:05 MysteryMeat1 wrote:Show nested quote +On July 27 2013 14:36 singlepost wrote:
I will leave this knowledge here in that someone may find this thread and eventually use it if they need it. Maybe even the OP will find it and put it in his post.
I am severly overweight, about 380lbs right now, and I have devised my own system out of necessity, because hygiene is paramount. While my system requires only 2 things, it is only partially portable and is best served if you "go" only at home.
First, I installed a 7 setting hand shower attachment to my regular shower. (requires nothing more than a T valve and some pipe thread tape)
Perform the following while standing up, but squatting in the shower. Reach around your back from the outside (not between your legs under) and BE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD SHOWER MAT or you will fall over.
Use the single center jet to wash away any remaining residue.
Then semi wrap a thick wet washcloth corner to corner across the shaft of a Craftsman 4 x 8 Phillips screwdriver.
Use this to scrub away any remainign debris. Use a small amount of mild soap or bodywash.
Change the showerhead to the outerring only, still having pressure. Rinse area completely.
Important: Post cleaning, you must dry properly or you will still eventually smell.
You can either dry with a thin clean dry wash cloth, or a full size sheet papertowel, again wrapped around the screwdriver metal shaft.
Place some menthol cooling body powder in your underwear to stay dry and sweat free.
If you must travel, you can use only the screwdriver method, although it takes a few more attempts to become completely clean.
also traveling with a crewdriver looks far less incriminating, than one of the bottom buddy things which looks like you stole it from the space shuttle. That made me throw up a little bit. I wonder what you searched to get to this thread on a gaming website...
lol yeah... god damn, what a mental image.
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I think the word "obese" is used incorrectly in this topic. You don't have to be so fucking huge that you can't reach your anus to be obese.
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High quality bump right there. Your contribution to the TL community shall be remembered, singlepost.
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The mother of all first world problems cometh.
Interesting post though. The elaborate logistics are seared into my brain.
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Had a friend when i was in my teens that had two quite obese parents. He would however often wonder how in the hell they had sex. Because no matter which position, bellies and fat thighs would probably be in the way of things "entering" other things. So how do obese people have sex? We are talking two obese persons here.
The most common missionary and from behind setups seem to be out of the question from the get go. The cowgirl does have some theoretic potential however.
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On September 06 2013 00:15 unkkz wrote:
Had a friend when i was in my teens that had two quite obese parents. He would however often wonder how in the hell they had sex. Because no matter which position, bellies and fat thighs would probably be in the way of things "entering" other things. So how do obese people have sex? We are talking two obese persons here.
The most common missionary and from behind setups seem to be out of the question from the get go. The cowgirl does have some theoretic potential however.
Hmmm, Didn't think about that.
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On September 05 2013 23:17 Kreb wrote:
High quality bump right there. Your contribution to the TL community shall be remembered, singlepost.
I swear to god, that, this wasn't me... Feels awkward to have a 1 post bump up my thread ... Please believe me ...
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On October 08 2013 11:29 Mr.Bimbles wrote:Show nested quote +On September 05 2013 23:17 Kreb wrote:
High quality bump right there. Your contribution to the TL community shall be remembered, singlepost. I swear to god, that, this wasn't me... Feels awkward to have a 1 post bump up my thread ... Please believe me ...
Suuure... a likely story.
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What keywords do people enter to find these posts?
There was seriously someone who bumped a thread where the original poster was pondering if he should go to Oklahoma University to say "You should go to U of O, it's a good school". The problem was, it was years after the original post was made. Then there was the "My anus hurts" one, and I believe one about masturbation or something. And then on top of that, someone in the BroodWar strategy section somehow found an old incontrol post and was like "Mr. Control, you seem to have a good understanding of zerg, can you help me out?"
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On October 08 2013 14:08 ninazerg wrote:
What keywords do people enter to find these posts?
There was seriously someone who bumped a thread where the original poster was pondering if he should go to Oklahoma University to say "You should go to U of O, it's a good school". The problem was, it was years after the original post was made. Then there was the "My anus hurts" one, and I believe one about masturbation or something. And then on top of that, someone in the BroodWar strategy section somehow found an old incontrol post and was like "Mr. Control, you seem to have a good understanding of zerg, can you help me out?"
You mean keywords like "wiping" or "toilet"
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This is a completely ridiculous post. I'm MORBIDLY OBESE 334 pounds & I CAN WIPE EVERY PART OF MYSELF DOWN THERE! This is the most rude post I've ever seen.
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EPT
