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Gummy
United States2180 Posts
I'm thinking of the following list: 1.) Go to bars. 2.) Knock on neighbor's doors. 3.) Play annoyingly loud music on my guitar while singing in hopes that somebody will knock on my door to tell me to shut up. 4.) Pay for friends' plane tickets to come visit me. Any other suggestions?   | ||
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Megaliskuu
United States5123 Posts
What could go wrong? | ||
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Chef
10810 Posts
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Gummy
United States2180 Posts
What are good interests to have? I feel like I have a lot of interests, but my depth of expertise on any given subject is very shallow  | ||
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Chef
10810 Posts
Typically expertise is not really necessary. There are clubs for people interested in photography, in languages, in other cultures etc. Probably a bunch of StarCraft or games in general too. The people who go to these things are not going because they want everyone to be super well informed, they are going to meet new people just like you. A topic of mutual interest serves simply as an icebreaker. I would guess most of the people there are not particularly well informed. Things like this usually say 'beginners welcome' etc. You will most likely meet a bunch of very humble people and maybe do some activities related to the interest, such as look at other people's boring photos or listening to someone describe their silver league strategy ;0 No reason to be intimidated. | ||
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bigwig123
163 Posts
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sob3k
United States7572 Posts
On July 05 2012 05:36 Gummy wrote: What are good interests to have? I think we may have identified the problem | ||
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docvoc
United States5491 Posts
I think Sob3k is right here. The way to make friends is to be outgoing and extraverted. Being charismatic and snarky are options or you can just be the nicest person you have ever met before. The way to meet people is to pick something you enjoy, pursue it and not be a dick, then you make friends. | ||
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PleasureImWallace
Canada45 Posts
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Disregard
China10252 Posts
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VenomBRA
Netherlands168 Posts
GL anyways, I know moving to a new city is tough! | ||
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Smancer
United States379 Posts
First, a word of caution about going to bars. It is very difficult to just strike up a conversation with someone. And the chances of you having common interests are slim. Going to a bar alone is not a great feeling either. If there is no place to sit at the bar, then standing around by yourself can be awkward. I know it can be done, and plenty of people find friends this way, but it simply didn't work for me. I have two ways that I think can help you or anyone in your position. The first is to use a dating site. Something like match.com or okcupid. Emailing and asking people out in this type of forum is great. It is what they are designed for, meeting people who interest you. Also there is virtually no feeling of rejection when you don't get an email back. I know people who treat it as searching for a job, they send out mass emails to lots of people and see what they get. The reason find a girlfriend or boyfriend is good, is because hopefully they have a friend network that they can introduce you into. The second way you can meet people is to find a class or group in your area. If you are into chess, look for a chess club. If like cooking, there might be a class that you can take nearby. If you like hiking or being outdoors, I am sure there are lots of group hikes, runs, bike rides etc. It is easier here to strike up a conversation with someone than a bar because you have similiar interests. You can talk about the thing you are doing! Good luck meeting people. | ||
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Gummy
United States2180 Posts
Are there sites, such as okcupid that you mentioned, where the implicit objective isn't to meet "the one" and instead is just to make friends? | ||
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don_kyuhote
3007 Posts
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PassionFruit
294 Posts
But you don't really go looking for friends. They just sort of "happen" if you go through the motions of life. Just stay active in a community through clubs, volunteering, work, etc... So long as you're not an uber introvert or a total douchebag, you'll eventually end up hanging out with people. | ||
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Smancer
United States379 Posts
On July 09 2012 15:13 Gummy wrote: ... Are there sites, such as okcupid that you mentioned, where the implicit objective isn't to meet "the one" and instead is just to make friends? Honestly Gummy, I wouldn't worry about it. I know girls that have used match.com because they want to eat a good meal and they know guys will take them out. You can be straight up in your profile and just say you are looking to meet people and you are new to the city. Not everyone on dating sites are looking to find a girl to marry. There are plenty that are just looking for a date. | ||
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Gummy
United States2180 Posts
On July 09 2012 16:22 don_kyuhote wrote: Is this the same Bellevue that iNcontroL talked about in itmejp's Real Talk? I don't know of any other bellevue. On July 09 2012 16:36 PassionFruit wrote: Dunno, go with your hobbies. There are clubs in your area that will cover whatever interest you have. If you don't have a hobby other than sc2, you can try to learn a new hobby. But you don't really go looking for friends. They just sort of "happen" if you go through the motions of life. Just stay active in a community through clubs, volunteering, work, etc... So long as you're not an uber introvert or a total douchebag, you'll eventually end up hanging out with people. Lol@sc2. On July 09 2012 22:08 Smancer wrote: Honestly Gummy, I wouldn't worry about it. I know girls that have used match.com because they want to eat a good meal and they know guys will take them out. You can be straight up in your profile and just say you are looking to meet people and you are new to the city. Not everyone on dating sites are looking to find a girl to marry. There are plenty that are just looking for a date. Nice. Time to get poor-er. lol | ||
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zOula...
United States898 Posts
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Gummy
United States2180 Posts
 Just tried okcupid. What a trainwreck, lol. It really really seems like less than 30% of the people who use that site are what I would call "normal" in the everyday sense, and they seem to get flooded with messages. The remaining girls give me weird vibes of complicated emotional issues, are obese, excessively exhibitionist, have dicks, or advertise their love of buttsecks. Also, if I put my status as single, it only shows me girls, which is cool I guess. This seems like fun http://threeimaginarygirls.com/calendar.asp | ||
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