EPTThere are many lessons I learned the hardest way. It only takes a lil 8hr. visit to jail to figure out that it's pretty dumb to stick up for yourself to a bully... if the bully is an officer of the law. Of the lessons I did not learn the hard way I hold one above all else. It's something my mother told me when I was about 15 or so.
I was a pretty gutsy teen. I stopped going to school really early as you can probably tell from some spelling mistakes I often make. I homeschooled for 7th and 8th grade and went to a private HS for two years then got my GED when I was 16.
If you are in a situation that is out of your control you have made a mistake.
I was straight edge thanks to my older sisters dating guys in the HardCore scene. I loved MinorThreat and Bane. The whole scene was pretty awesome in the Twin City area. That kept me from drinking and doing drugs with ease. I was so closed minded I would excomunicate anyone that wasn't straightXedge. One of the things I would think about was the same thing my mother told me.
If you are out of control of the situation you're in it's very dangerous.
So I missed a lot of parties because no one wants some stuck up sXe kid telling everyone they're stupid for getting fucked up but I was in control of my situations. You might have heard about someone you know being at a party and getting in a fight or getting in a car with someone driving drunk or maybe just making out with someone they didn't want to. All of that can be avoided by knowing your limits and staying in control.
It can be really scary to be unable to go the direction you want. When your freedom is restricted it's a terrible feeling.
I was pulled over on my motorcycle when I was 16. The bike had some title issues so I borrowed my friends plates to go to a festival in NY. The police were overly nice and didn't arrest me. The charges would have been:
Operating with attached plates
Operating without insurance (mandatory in MA)
Speeding 63 in a 30
Operating to endanger (twice the speed limit)
When I was pulled over I knew I was fucked... Hard... so I was super pissed at myself for speeding. Zi punched the gastank and threw my helmet to the ground. An over reaction for sure... also... not a great thing to do in front of a police officer.
He called for backup. There were two state cops and two town cops lined up behind me before they even approached the bike. I could see in my side mirror that at least two of them had their hands on their holsters. I put my hands up. "Are you cool man" the cop asked. I said something to the effect of "Yeah, I'm sorry I just know I'm screwed". Through some conversations with different officers they decided I deserved a break and gave me a written warning for missing plates on a vehicle on public property. The only fine was for the towing charge and impound cost whenever I got it out. A HUGE break.
At this point I was relieved to be out of that situation. Lesson learned. Don't take risks you don't want to pay the consequences of.
I didn't have much time to reflect on how lucky I was becsuse I had a new problem at hand. I'm still at least 100 miles from home and I know my parents won't be home for another day. (This is before cell phones). So I thumbed a ride. I had hitchhiked before some smaller distances but this was kinda far. I figured I had pleanty of daylight so I wouldn't get beat up or raped or anything... right?
I was picked up pretty quick by a guy in some old boxy looking car. I hopped in and immideately could smell booze. "Uhh..." I mumbled. What ever decision I was trying to make was so slow I found myself in a moving, kind of swerving car with a fat old guy dring something out of a "BigGulp" cup. We got to talking about where I was going and he was going to a few towns west of Gardner (where I'm from). I figured as long as I live through the ride it'll be pretty lucky. I could nearly walk the rest of the distance.
I was completely out of control. I was in a car with a drunk guy going where ever the hell he wanted and my options were to stay in the car or book it next time the car stopped. These are BAD options. The reason I was in this situation at all was that I took a risk and lost control.
We're about 15 minutes from where he was going to drop me off when he insists I see his guitar. We had been talking about music and such and he HAD to show me his 1960s Martin. I was very nervous... we pulled into one of those rent by the week hotels and stopped.
You can't imagine how scary it was to not know where you are and feel like a prisoner. For whatever reason I got out and followed him towards his room. When he opened the door he said something to someone inside and I froze. I think I remember him saying something about his son being there or something. "Uh... I'll hang out here" or somthing to that effect.
If you're out of control of the situation you made a mistake.
What brought me to that situation? It was being badass and driving my sweet ass GS350 to New York and almost back.
So I'm telling you. Stay in control. Don't get to the point where decisions are being made for you. Don't let getting drunk or high make decisions for you. If your friend is driving too fast? If you are arrested for something stupid? If you're with people that are doing risky things? Make sure you can survive the consequences. You probably will live... but it might be a little scary getting there.
