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I have to leave here now for I am in danger

Blogs > Coagulation
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Coagulation
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States9633 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-05-04 21:31:26
May 04 2012 20:54 GMT
#1
... im living on borrowed time around here. I pretty much have since the day i signed up like 8 years ago..(even I cant help but wonder HOW am I not perma banned yet??? as I sit back and watch vets like charlie fall swiftly to the banhammers of justice.) Anyway I Have pretty much come to the conclusion that If I have any desire of self preservation around these parts it would be in my best interest to retire this account and nod out now before its too late.

to give you guys an idea of what im talking about I have taken the liberty of compiling the majority of my bans/warnings in chronological order.. Its a pretty long read so I cut out all the generic message warnings and bans that I dont understand where they came from or what they are for or who they are from.

My first ban. from back in early 06 Beyonder popped my cherry gently but firmly.. ushering in my newfound higher standard of posting.
+ Show Spoiler +
From: Beyonder [ 12548 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: 2 week ban
Date: 11/13/06 06:04
I've banned you for 2 weeks for bad one-line-posts. Please sit these weeks out and up your posting quality.

Thanks

Reply


Next I have a couple warnings from multiple concerned mods about this gem of a thread.
+ Show Spoiler +
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=45888



My second ban was from rekrul for this whopper of a fail thread.. it pains me to look back on this and see how bad I have failed beyonder in upping my post quality ( and even more so today). good luck trying to figure out what exactly I was doing cause I dont even remember. I think this was back when I could still edit my posts when I was banned so I kept posting in it till it got closed.
+ Show Spoiler +
keep in mind this was long before there was a ban list or a fancy robot to send me a nice pm about why I suck and should probably go away..
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=51946


and shortly after the introduction of the snazzy new automated ban and warning system I got my first real warning from the man himself.
+ Show Spoiler +
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 3/20/10 17:10
This is a Warning!

Manner please.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Manifesto7

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)




my next warning was unfortunately not signed by a mod/admin so I have no idea who gave it to me or what it was about..
"shrug"
+ Show Spoiler +

This is a Warning!

Hello!

The mod staff have noticed that your post quality has deteriorated fairly rapidly in recent times. As a veteran user of the forum it is expected that you set a good example for newer users, something which you are not fulfilling. We do not want to suck the fun out of the forum either and accept that there will be some flames thrown about, but the way you have gone about single-handedly degenerating the quality of the forum is too much for us to put up with any longer. Failure to improve posting standards will result in a lengthy ban.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
The Mod Staff

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)


My next warning was a warning from a mod warning me not to warn the mods. unfortunatly I rather not disclose the circumstances on that one as there is security sensitive information related. Needless to say it was a joke but +1 regardless

The next warning (im gonna assume it was from plexa i dont know it wasnt signed ) was a pretty unreasonable one imo but w/e Its not my place to judge. I think kangaroos can add positive discussion to ANY topic.
+ Show Spoiler +
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=136829#2
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 7/17/10 15:11
This is a Warning!

Please dont post image macros on the forum. You're lucky that thread is being closed because I'm sure that that post would have derailed the thread as well.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
The Mod Staff

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


my next warning was from intrigue for an accidental repost. I worded my post pretty poorly so I prolly deserved it.
+ Show Spoiler +
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 7/22/10 17:10
This is a Warning!

Please use the search function before you make a thread. Why would you write "dunno if this is repost or not" and not check?

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
The Mod Staff

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)


this next post was so bad that apparently mods felt inclined to stack warnings. some kind of warning 2.0 system.
Looking back on it I probably deserved a perma ban.
+ Show Spoiler +
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=138494

From: Liquid`Jinro [ 32242 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 7/26/10 08:05
This is a Warning!

... Really? Seems a bit tasteless.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Liquid`Jinro

Reply



From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 7/26/10 08:04
This is a Warning!

Completely inappropriate, please have some tact during tragic events.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Jibba

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)


My next warning comes from a bad habit I have of seeking out really bad posts as soon as they pop up in general and posting something completely offtopic and probably offensive as the first reply. I have no idea who warned me

+ Show Spoiler +
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=144559#2

From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 8/16/10 19:18
This is a Warning!

nice

Nice post. Completely unnecessary too. Let mods deal with bad threads, don't bump them needlessly.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
The Mod Staff

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


My next warning is from manifesto and pretty self explanatory

+ Show Spoiler +

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=146926#17

From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 8/24/10 19:22
This is a Warning!

"this thread is full of wrong."

If it is wrong, then don't post in it. Thanks!

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Manifesto7

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


next up is a warning from nyovne. apparently he interperated my post as flame bait. maybe hes right but I dont think that was my intentions at the time.
+ Show Spoiler +

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=146918#2
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 8/24/10 22:40
This is a Warning!

Don't post inflammatory remarks in a negative tone in a thread. Let alone as first post in an obvious attempt to derail it.

Not acceptable.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Nyovne

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


first temp ban in a while.. just a friendly reminder that I suck and should take a week to think about it...

+ Show Spoiler +

You have been temp banned for 1 week by Nyovne.

Reason: Your recent posting behavior has been spiraling ever on downwards and you seem to plainly ignore the warnings given you or take lesson from them, so I say take a week off and think about if you actually want to be a member of this community.

Do not attempt to circumvent this ban by making a new account, or your ban duration will be increased.


My next temp ban is 2 days compliments of

+ Show Spoiler +

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=157162#10
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: You have been temp banned for 2 days.
Date: 10/1/10 06:28
You have been temp banned for 2 days by p4NDemik.

Reason:
On October 01 2010 05:56 Coagulation wrote:
*Image*

is this said crotch shot??

To think people don't stop and ponder if posting like this is a good idea or not.

Do not attempt to circumvent this ban by making a new account, or your ban duration will be increased.

Reply


My next warning came from this thread when I defended someone who got perm banned for a really piss poor reason imo. I dont know if people remember the maji guy who posted in general about being an alien and preparing for the coming invasion etc. I personally thought it was funny as fuck but admins banned him and I got a warning for asking why in thread. wich had lead to this exchange of PM with mods.

+ Show Spoiler +
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=136042&currentpage=23#448
From: H [ 5931 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Re: sorry
Date: 7/24/10 16:16

-----------------------------------------
Original Message:


he has very different/crazy outlook on things i understand this but i have to honestly say that he hasnt hurt anybody with his storys. i find them interesting and i am a little upset he was banned for something so trivial.


-----------------------------------------
REPLY


The problem is that while you may enjoy reading his opinions and he may be a source of amusement to other posters, he contributes absolutely nothing to the site and in fact is actually detracting from it. Teamliquid is ideally a place where anyone can share their opinion, but at the end of the day the moderators define what opinions can be shared - and Maji's opinions are not something the moderation team cares for. Note Rule #1 of the TL Commandments.


Original Message:
Yes Good sir I have studied these commandments well in my many years of observing tl.net and its citizens.

However perhaps you do not understand the entire scope of this dire situation.

I must caution you to take note.. If you would for a second please consider the possible ramifications of presenting such hostility's towards a possible agent of the intergalactic community.
Such actions could only prove to be unfavorable in teamliquids survival.

In the chance occurrence of an actual alien invasion Teamliquid would probably be targeted for assimilation immediately upon enslavement of the human race. There would be little chance for diplomatic measures on our part having severed off all ties of communication with them. The fate of teamliquid Nay .. Mankind itself my very well rest in your hands. I only hope it is not too late. For I fear they have lasers, and our banhammers will stand no chance.


Regards
Coagulation.

As a member of the Intergalactic Teamliquid Moderation Committee I understand your points of concern, but rest assured we have contingency plans in place in the event of alien invasion. We have been assembling the best of the best of the BEST for years. We have wizards from the most remote of lands manufacturing combatants for any manner of menace. Teamliquid looks out for the interests of humanity.


I may not have gotten him unbanned but at least I can rest easily now knowing somewhere out there teamliquid is preparing for majis coming invasion.
-----------------------------------------


My next temp ban is 1 week for taking hostages. (to be fair it only lasted 2 days)
+ Show Spoiler +
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: You have been temp banned for 1 week.
Date: 10/7/10 17:25
You have been temp banned for 1 week by intrigue.

Reason: Taking hostages.

Do not attempt to circumvent this ban by making a new account, or your ban duration will be increased.

Reply


Another warning here for I have no idea what the problem here is but... no idea who its from but they apparently have warned me before. Looking back at it I think the person who warned me over reacted alot. I dont see any insulting or anything of that nature in my post but maybe it was a case of multiple posts on that day.. anyway If in doubt its prolly my fault.
+ Show Spoiler +

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/postmessage.php?quote=3&topic_id=160421
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 10/14/10 07:48
This is a Warning!

Why do you insist on continually insulting and berating users who create topics that you don't "agree with?" If you don't like the thread, don't post in it. It's that fucking simple.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
The Mod Staff

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


next ban up is a two weeker. pretty much 100% deserved. probably should be a perm level post.
+ Show Spoiler +
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: You have been temp banned for 2 weeks.
Date: 12/27/10 17:14
You have been temp banned for 2 weeks by heyoka.

Reason: You've been here a while and repeatedly warned for bad posts. 'Your sister hot?' is the kind of comment that makes it obvious you need to step back and rethink what you do here.

Do not attempt to circumvent this ban by making a new account, or your ban duration will be increased.

Reply


Next up a warning that im honestly not sure what I did or why it was such a big deal but this ones a pretty mean one.

+ Show Spoiler +

Original Message From TL.net Bot:
This is a Warning!

Seriously, 11 warnings, 5 bans in 2010 alone and you still think you can get away with any form of posting other then being the new TL 2011 examplar posterboy? I suggest you learn to express yourself in a more articulate, well thought out and respectful manner of the next step is going to be a perm ban.

I seriously do not understand why your last one wasn't one so here it is, the last stop before disneyland. Shape up, shape up good or stop posting if you're not up to the challenge because it's going to have to be good, average posting won't save you. Be respectful, insightful, watch your tone and choice of words and lay off the oneliners. This goes for any forum

Good luck, you'll need it.

Show nested quote +
who the hells banksy and why would anyone care enough pay to pay for his name?

pictures of his work

[image loading]
[image loading]
[image loading]

googled some pics.. pretty cool but i sure dont give a fuck who did it.


Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Nyovne

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)


Next up a warning for using red text.. in a post. pretty lame.
+ Show Spoiler +
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 2/24/11 23:49
This is a Warning!

*waits for mod* *to post or drive by*

User was banned for this post.

+ Show Spoiler +

this should be obvious: don't imitate mods' red text

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
The Mod Staff

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


wat
+ Show Spoiler +

Original Message From TL.net Bot:
This is a Warning!

You know better.

Show nested quote +
On May 13 2011 07:30 Maliris wrote:
Yeah I believe in them, especially considering I was a contactee... the greys abducted me around 4 years ago in the middle of the night, was very scary :[ ive had trouble sleeping for years because of it, but they've left me alone for now..


wat?

Edit: wat?


Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
Excalibur_Z

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)


a warning from {CC}StealthBlue probably for all caps more than my idiotic post content.
+ Show Spoiler +

New PM
Private Message
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 10/14/11 05:10
This is a Warning!

Please put some effort into your posts. One word replies and other low content posts are not appreciated here.

I OWE A LIFE DEBT TO MANIFESTO THAT HE HAS NOT YET CALLED UPON ME FOR YET.

I STAY AWAKE IN BED FOR HOURS.


Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
{CC}StealthBlue

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


A warning from p4NDemik.. It was a joke im thinking he misunderstood. w/e.

+ Show Spoiler +
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 1/28/12 06:00
This is a Warning!

has anyone reminded yall that yer all weird and creepy in the last 200 or so pages?

If not
+ Show Spoiler +

Dude we've both posted a combined 15,000+ times on a video game website. By someone else's definition of the word we're probably weird as fuck too. They are already well aware how other people might look at their hobby, no need to remind them.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
p4NDemik

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


A warning from ToKoreaWithLove for being a little too blunt about the mishaps in mafia.
+ Show Spoiler +
Private Message
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: Warning!
Date: 2/2/12 10:22
This is a Warning!

While different opinions are welcome, please try to keep debate civil. Flaming is unacceptable on these forums, and ad hominem attacks are not appreciated.

I love how you guys still shit all over each other constantly like your upholding some jedi council code.


Thanks in advance for your cooperation,
ToKoreaWithLove

(Do not reply to this message. No one will receive it.)

Reply


I win my next temp ban in the ABL
+ Show Spoiler +


From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: You have been temp banned for 2 days.
Date: 2/6/12 08:24
You have been temp banned for 2 days by KwarK.

Reason: you win

Do not attempt to circumvent this ban by making a new account, or your ban duration will be increased.

Reply


This one is one of my favorite also most recent and what prompted me to make this post and make an effort to save my account from my own self inflicted bad posting.
+ Show Spoiler +
Private Message
From: TL.net Bot [ 3 posts | Profile | Buddy ]
Subject: You have been temp banned for 1 week.
Date: 4/26/12 19:41
You have been temp banned for 1 week by vGl-CoW.

Reason: 27th mod note.. don't think you'll be around here much longer if you keep this up

Do not attempt to circumvent this ban by making a new account, or your ban duration will be increased.

Reply


Hopefully If anyone is to walk away from reading all these warnings/bans stupidity on my part etc with having learned something I would hope it would be this.

Teamliquid as strict as it may be is not some super evil entity out to ban and wipe out anyone that they dont agree with.
I am living walking proof of this. TL.net has given me more chances than I honestly ever deserved because at the end of the day they just want to make me and you a better person. to make their home a better place.

Anyway Im going to retire this account. I would like to apologize to TL mods for being a twat over the years and thank them for putting up with me.

hopefully some day I will come back.. maybe 10 years down the road.. when the mods have all forgotten how bad of a poster I really am and its safe for me to come out again.. but for now.. for now as much as it sucks I have a couple tiny bits of unfinished business with the mafia ban list but after that I must say goodbye.

****
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26781 Posts
May 04 2012 21:02 GMT
#2
I'll miss you Coagulation. I'll update the ban list (lolol) in your name~
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
Hyperbola
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States2536 Posts
May 04 2012 21:03 GMT
#3
Wouldn't it be better not to draw attention to yourself?
####
Mawi
Profile Joined August 2010
Sweden4365 Posts
May 04 2012 21:04 GMT
#4
Man i will allways miss you, you brough so much epicness into this website that has now turned into...... not safe to say it in here!

Forever missed Coagulation the one and only!
Forever Mirin Zyzz Son of Zeus Brother of Hercules Father of the Aesthetics
blubbdavid
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Switzerland2412 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-05-04 21:07:57
May 04 2012 21:07 GMT
#5
Is it because you get ignored on the Mafia banlist?

bb, wanted to play a game with you once...
What do you desire? Money? Glory? Power? Revenge? Or something that surpasses all other? Whatever you desire - that is here. Tower of God ¦¦Nutella, drink of the Gods
Coagulation
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States9633 Posts
May 04 2012 21:09 GMT
#6
this has nothing to do with mafia.
jrkirby
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States1510 Posts
May 04 2012 21:12 GMT
#7
Do you know any instruments? Perhaps you should start a banned.
tonight
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
United States11130 Posts
May 04 2012 21:18 GMT
#8
You better shape up, brother. I received one warning before quickly walking the path to righteousness. You can forever be the model TL citizen if you simply toe the line.
if I come without a thing, then I come with all I need @tonightsend
BroOd
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Austin10831 Posts
May 04 2012 21:21 GMT
#9
I think a reasonable person would simply strive to be more judicious in the future. Most people have probably had an impulse to make shitty posts from time to time (I've made a million of 'em), but eventually, if you like this place enough, you get to the point where you're invested in its quality so you take care not to. If you don't care, fine, but I don't really buy the whole "I can't control my posting so I have to leave."
ModeratorSIRL and JLIG.
TheWorldToCome
Profile Joined January 2012
United States452 Posts
May 04 2012 21:25 GMT
#10
Getting temp banned at least once is part of the TL experience IMHO.
Starcraft 2 was designed to have a best race. You play the worst one.
One Student
Profile Joined April 2011
73 Posts
May 04 2012 21:25 GMT
#11
On May 05 2012 06:12 jrkirby wrote:
Do you know any instruments? Perhaps you should start a banned.


Badum-Tsssss.

To OP you could just do what I do and lurk most of the time. Judging people from posts... yes.
Depression is what you get for leading a repetitive life.
BreakfastBurrito
Profile Joined November 2011
United States893 Posts
May 04 2012 21:28 GMT
#12
If you put as much attention in to your posts as you did your blog, you wouldn't have an issue in the first place.
You have the capability to be an acceptable poster but it seems like you have forgotten, many times.

This thread was hilarious, bravo. You are lucky to have stayed here so long- truly brilliant sequence of events.
IMO you shouldn't leave but should continue posting
twitch.tv/jaytherey | Yapper891 if you are reading this, PM me. its Twisty.
brian
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States9616 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-05-04 21:32:16
May 04 2012 21:30 GMT
#13
those first two are absolutely classic, imo(edit: 2 & 3, rather.). I remember laughing then, and just as much now. if only the rest were funny.
CecilSunkure
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2829 Posts
May 04 2012 21:34 GMT
#14
Lol what's the story behind this hostages thing? How can you take hostages on a forum?
ampson
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States2355 Posts
May 04 2012 21:38 GMT
#15
Perhaps you could banned together with some other people who have issues with their posters. You could start a support group or rehab center or something,
cmen15
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States1519 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-05-04 21:45:46
May 04 2012 21:43 GMT
#16
Is it bad if I like all your posts lol?

edit: the troll is strong with this one.
Greed leads to just about all losses.
Attican
Profile Joined October 2010
Denmark531 Posts
May 04 2012 21:44 GMT
#17
Teamliquid is the world's most awesome/slow paced death race. Last poster still unbanned wins the internet or something cool like that.
Aphasie
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Norway474 Posts
May 04 2012 21:49 GMT
#18
Interesting read, seems its too little effort (too much trolling is much nicer). But if you have been posting for 6 years, i imagine you will have a hard time filling all that spare time...

I wish you luck on your next half-assed endeavors!
Mattson
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
Canada188 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-05-04 21:51:36
May 04 2012 21:50 GMT
#19
Real men ask for a full usermap axe.

Everyone knows you have an alt... quit getting high off your own drama.

EDIT: That was a bit harsh but all I got from this post was someone saying 'look at how cool I am'
Cynicism isn't wisdom; it's a lazy way to say that you've been burned. Seems if anything you'd be less certain after everything you ever learned.
dAPhREAk
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Nauru12397 Posts
May 04 2012 22:02 GMT
#20
lol. good read.
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