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Stories from Hotels: Part 1--The Phantom Pooper

Blogs > neo_sporin
Post a Reply
neo_sporin
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States516 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-02-13 17:20:18
February 13 2012 14:41 GMT
#1
Hotels are crazy places. I've worked in hospitality for 6 years now on all 3 shifts and have seen and experienced things that would make most people cringe. As I see new things every day in my line of work I will be writing about some of my experiences as I fear I may begin to forget these over the coming years.

Story 1.
It was a Thursday night during my year as night audit. Night auditors generally work from 11:00 PM to 7:00 AM and with bars closing in NC at 2:00 AM I would generally see my fair share of drunk people stumbling in between 2:30 and 3:00, thus I would always have my night engineer/security do a walk through of the building afterward to make sure there weren't any guests sleeping in the hall. Near 4:00 while he was on his rounds I have an EXTREMELY drunk guest exit the elevator and wander by.

I approach him to find out where he needs to be and he drunkenly stammers that his room is 724. I check his ID to confirm who he is, but unfortunately with the room being under his friends name we couldn't confirm his identity.

I ask him to wait there for me while I call my engineer to escort him to his room and when I return he is no where to be found. I explain to my engineer what has happened and to go look for him. My engineer asks if he was wearing red basketball shorts and was asian and I confirm.

My engineer responds "I'm going to find that asshole so he can clean the 7th floor!" to which I give him a very perplexed look. He then tells me he had seen the guy up on the 7th floor as he was just drunkenly standing in the hall. Unfortunately I had called him on the radio about another issue so he left the guy there as he didn't appear to be causing trouble. When he returned to the 7th floor a few minutes later all that was left where the guest had been standing was a poop in the middle of the hall.
We were never able to find the guy again, and to our knowledge was not the guest of 724.

****
FuRong
Profile Joined April 2010
New Zealand3089 Posts
February 13 2012 14:46 GMT
#2
Looks promising, we need more content like this with unique "inside the industry" stories and less emo whining in the blogs section imo.

Just reading your description of your job makes me think that there must be a lot more stories where this came from.
Don't hate the player, hate the game
DreamChaser
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
1649 Posts
February 13 2012 15:14 GMT
#3
I didn't even read the second part of your title but i knew this was going to be good.
Plays against every MU with nexus first.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32051 Posts
February 13 2012 15:18 GMT
#4
hahahahaahahah

I remember reading some kind of similar stories from hotel hospitality person, and it was awesome. Look forward to this series!
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Swilvan
Profile Joined March 2011
113 Posts
February 13 2012 15:25 GMT
#5
If you do one of these every week, consider me subscribed
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44264 Posts
February 13 2012 15:33 GMT
#6
It was Colonel Mustard... in the hallway... with the... poop...

Please post more of these stories ^^ Very funny (for me- and maybe you retrospectively )
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
ShaLLoW[baY]
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Canada12499 Posts
February 13 2012 15:36 GMT
#7
Some guy shit on the floor of the laundry room during my first year at military college and we all got railed pretty hard for the rest of the year because of it.

We never found out who it was, so he just became the Phantom Shitter/ Fecal Bandit.

Thread title brought back 'fond' memories
ALEXISONFIRE ARE FUCKING BACK (sAviOr for life)
Whole
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States6046 Posts
February 13 2012 17:49 GMT
#8
ahahaaha. Excellent and brief blog. I can't wait for the next part.
TheToast
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States4808 Posts
February 13 2012 18:23 GMT
#9
Nice, more stories please!
I like the way the walls go out. Gives you an open feeling. Firefly's a good design. People don't appreciate the substance of things. Objects in space. People miss out on what's solid.
Snuggles
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States1865 Posts
February 13 2012 18:43 GMT
#10
I love stories like this. I read a book, forgot what it was called but, it consisted of stories like these about their work lives. Love it, looking forward fore more.
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
February 13 2012 19:32 GMT
#11
I want to see more of these, this is going to be amazing :DDDDDD
Though i'd like it if there were returning characters with names so that we can have a story line like thing
User was warned for too many mimes.
Swede
Profile Joined June 2010
New Zealand853 Posts
February 13 2012 21:27 GMT
#12
You gotta have some gold after 6 years. Post some more! That was pretty hilarious.
neo_sporin
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States516 Posts
February 13 2012 23:50 GMT
#13
On February 14 2012 04:32 docvoc wrote:
I want to see more of these, this is going to be amazing :DDDDDD
Though i'd like it if there were returning characters with names so that we can have a story line like thing


I was thinking about that as well, but then realized since at least right now my plan is to only tell the stories that I was involved in the supporting cast varies so much there will be very few returning characters. In my 6 years I have worked at 2 full service hotels, 1 select service independent hotel, 2 conference service centers and a corporate office, additionally hotels generally have a turnover rate between 40-70%. I have also been responsible for a number of my coworkers being fired for their stupidity (those stories will show up I'm sure).

I will try to make a more cohesive storyline throughout everything and add approximate dates so a timeline can be created for people. There are many more adventures to be had so I am glad to have gotten these great responses so far. Thank you for the support everyone
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