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my mom is telling me to be a gold digger - Page 3

Blogs > kierpanda
Post a Reply
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Black[CAT]
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Malaysia2589 Posts
November 24 2011 09:21 GMT
#41
Chinese in general are pretty materialistic...
Money 1st, then all is well. I'm Chinese so I see these shit a lot in life....
You mean ESPORTS isnt a synonym for SC2? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ -Proud owner of a Filco Majestouch 2 with Cherry Blue Switches- BW or SC2? Why not both?
Azzur
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Australia6259 Posts
November 24 2011 09:25 GMT
#42
If a girl has a bf who pays for everything, doesn't mean she's gold-digging. If I have a son, I'm going to teach him this - it makes him more like a man. Your mum is only looking out for you.
kierpanda
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States757 Posts
November 24 2011 09:29 GMT
#43
On November 24 2011 18:25 Azzur wrote:
If a girl has a bf who pays for everything, doesn't mean she's gold-digging. If I have a son, I'm going to teach him this - it makes him more like a man. Your mum is only looking out for you.


Yes, you're right, it doesn't mean it's gold digging if the guy offers to pay all the time. However, if a girl expects a guy to constantly pay for things, then I believe that can be considered as gold digging.

My mom expects my boyfriend to pay for everything for me. So she's basically doing the gold digging for me.

I don't expect my boyfriend to pay for anything. If he wants to pay for something, awesome! But I'll be sure to pay for the next thing, because that's how I roll.
I cook things! :3 | Twitter: @kierpanda | www.eatgamelive.com
j0k3r
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States577 Posts
November 24 2011 09:30 GMT
#44
On November 24 2011 18:16 kierpanda wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 24 2011 18:14 j0k3r wrote:
On November 24 2011 17:33 Ruffian wrote:
Wow our moms think alike! Seriously. When I had a boyfriend she was appalled that we took turns on paying for things or split the bill. She also thought it was terrible that I sometimes visited his house because "you should let the boy come visit you" yeah idek. She once witnessed me holding the door open for my boyfriend. Don't get me started on the talking to I got after that lol >.>


Hey! Maybe my girlfriend is your sister because this is how her mom thinks 100%. Are you Chinese by any chance? It seems to be a quite traditional mentality.


Yep. 3rd generation American born Chinese. I am white-washed. hahah.


Ah, it's good your mother isn't stopping you though, that's what's important anyway. Sometimes I wish my girlfriends parents were second gen. Chinese American or perhaps white. The only beef I have is them not letting her sleepover my place. They go to long lengths to protect her chastity. I can sleepover their home in a guest room, but hell would need to freeze over before she could get permission to stay at my place. Marriage is the only way that's gonna happen. Her white friends however, can do whatever the hell they wish
Celestial
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States652 Posts
November 24 2011 09:40 GMT
#45
Really, life is sorta give and take in terms of luck with money. I remember a time when my fiancée and I had to rely on the other more than we were comfortable, but that's just how life is.
th2pun1sh3r
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States107 Posts
November 24 2011 09:47 GMT
#46
if you look good you should take advantage of that

if not you are going to have to work lol
"Rank-1 Master Random Sc2 Player"
baubo
Profile Joined September 2008
China3370 Posts
November 24 2011 09:54 GMT
#47
On November 24 2011 18:21 Black[CAT] wrote:
Chinese in general are pretty materialistic...
Money 1st, then all is well. I'm Chinese so I see these shit a lot in life....


As someone who has lived in US and China, I don't even know how to respond to this. I guess you must be right. We all know that the global financial crisis happened because of the materialism of Chinese people. That China must have a huge trade deficit because its people can't stop spending and maxing out their credit cards. That Chinese people can't possibly save a greater percentage of their income than any other major country. That the Chinese government must run a huge deficit because they're so materialistic they can't prevent themselves from spending recklessly to fight wars and establish bases around the world.

Yes, Chinese as a race must be the most materialistic people in the world. I can't think of another nation that likes materialistic things. There may be one... but I just can't put my finger on it.... No, I think you are right. There can't possibly be a nation of people who care more about money and material wealth than Chinese.
Meh
Newbistic
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
China2912 Posts
November 24 2011 10:03 GMT
#48
On November 24 2011 18:54 baubo wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 24 2011 18:21 Black[CAT] wrote:
Chinese in general are pretty materialistic...
Money 1st, then all is well. I'm Chinese so I see these shit a lot in life....


As someone who has lived in US and China, I don't even know how to respond to this. I guess you must be right. We all know that the global financial crisis happened because of the materialism of Chinese people. That China must have a huge trade deficit because its people can't stop spending and maxing out their credit cards. That Chinese people can't possibly save a greater percentage of their income than any other major country. That the Chinese government must run a huge deficit because they're so materialistic they can't prevent themselves from spending recklessly to fight wars and establish bases around the world.

Yes, Chinese as a race must be the most materialistic people in the world. I can't think of another nation that likes materialistic things. There may be one... but I just can't put my finger on it.... No, I think you are right. There can't possibly be a nation of people who care more about money and material wealth than Chinese.


This is a pretty poor attempt at sarcasm. Chinese people are extremely materialistic as a culture, much more than that other country you "can't put a finger on". Just because other nations actually have more stuff doesn't mean they're more materialistic, it just means they have more stuff to begin with.

Logic is Overrated
Mobius_1
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United Kingdom2763 Posts
November 24 2011 10:33 GMT
#49
As a guy, I tend to offer to pay, but quite often girls prefer to split 50/50. Which I'm cool with.

Your mom's view is a little old-fashioned. It's not that splitting the bill is un-chivalrous, it's just being responsible and stuff.
Starleague Forever. RIP KT Violet~
dizzee
Profile Joined November 2011
Norway36 Posts
November 24 2011 10:34 GMT
#50
An important part of any relationship is sharing responsibilty. If one truly does love one another, then you will provide for your counterpart. If your mom is encouraging you to 'gold dig' then she does not wish well for you, atleast when it comes to relationships. It is understandable that she is trying to pass on what worked for her, but from what you have told us, she seems too shallow to be able to reflect upon 'gold digging' and see how it harms the relationship.
Know that you do enjoy your life, and that life is a year-long cycle in which after winter, summer always arrives.
Catch]22
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Sweden2683 Posts
November 24 2011 10:45 GMT
#51
Ihve had a few short relationships in which I never felt bad about providing for her, money just isn't a big deal to me I guess..
Gummy
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States2180 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-11-24 11:08:27
November 24 2011 11:02 GMT
#52
As a man, I enjoy the opportunity to show off the extravagant inherited wealth that is my good education. Then I pay for the date so as to show off the extravagance that is my six-figure salary.

Edit: Just asked my mom her opinion on this and she would like me to be a gold-digger as well. Where be those money honeys?
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ There are three kinds of people in the world: those who can count and those who can't.
THE_DOMINATOR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States309 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-11-24 11:05:05
November 24 2011 11:03 GMT
#53
I like to pay for dates when I can but I like it one thousand times more if my girl takes me out on a date. Tis rare though, I think in my last relationship which lasted for 2 years I was taken out by her maybe 4 times. The rest of the time I usually paid for everything.

edit: Also fuck those moms. Women want equal rights then they get equal responsibilities this ain't the 50's
DOMINATION
hellbound
Profile Joined April 2010
United Kingdom2242 Posts
November 24 2011 11:04 GMT
#54
For me splitting costs equally is a must. And buying things that are only useful to your significant other (except on occasions of course) is a big nono. I think that women who can't handle such policies have self respect issues, so good on you OP.
Taf the Ghost
Profile Joined December 2010
United States11751 Posts
November 24 2011 11:08 GMT
#55
Want to commend the poster. Your mother isn't giving you great advice, especially with the way things have changed in the USA. Being able to take care of yourself is rather important.

One side point. The Codes of Chivalry existed for 1 purpose: to prevent the large groups of armed men from raping & pillaging the populace. So, unless your mother wants to start bowing to powerful men and calling them "my liege", you might suggest she rethink that concept. (It's the same reason Police & Military are valued in society but have massive constraints placed upon them. It was just the 1200s version of it.)

As for paying for dates, always split it. This isn't the 1920s; there's no reason for the guy to foot the entire bill. It'll pretty much never get you anything, anyway. (Exception is if you want to go somewhere very specific that she isn't so keen on, then you get points for being adventurous)
Sokalo
Profile Joined May 2010
United States375 Posts
November 24 2011 11:21 GMT
#56
On November 24 2011 18:00 kierpanda wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 24 2011 17:55 Rekrul wrote:
On November 24 2011 17:54 kierpanda wrote:
On November 24 2011 17:46 Ludrik wrote:
On November 24 2011 17:42 kierpanda wrote:
On November 24 2011 17:37 igotmyown wrote:
I thought you were actually going to tell us her advice on how to be a gold digger. Maybe there were some super evil gold digging secrets.


Be from Taiwan or HK?

Just kidding! :'D

But that's typically the stereotype, unfortunately. :\ My older brother dated a Taiwanese girl. Damn, that girl was spoiled. My brother bought her an expensive Tiffany's necklace a few months after they were dating.

My brother is also a moron/tool.

So....

I think there's some truth to that stereotype. My girlfriends from Hong Kong and while she isn't a gold digger, f*&# me her sister is. Talking about using your body for money. Very dated concept imo.


I went to school with a few girls from HK -- all they do is show off their newest designer bag or boots or whatever. My facebook newsfeed used to be cluttered with this former classmate's pictures of her new Tiffany jewelry and Juicy Couture clothes.

I know not all girls are like that, but the ones who are ... yuck.


judging these girls off that makes you yuck, not them


I have no qualms about that.


This may be the first thing I've seen from Rekrul that I seriously disagree with.
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it."
Kickboxer
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Slovenia1308 Posts
November 24 2011 11:26 GMT
#57
As soon as your dad kicks your mom to the curb to replace her with an upgraded gold digger model (type twenty-something, with firm and perky accessories) she is in line for a hardcore reality check ^_^.

I admire your choices. A women who expects to be paid for is nothing but a long-term hooker.
TheKefka
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Croatia11752 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-11-24 11:43:17
November 24 2011 11:42 GMT
#58
Just a side question,how old are you and your boyfriend?
Cackle™
Eatme
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
Switzerland3919 Posts
November 24 2011 12:05 GMT
#59
I always try to stay away from girls with gold digging tendencies. Luckily I have not stumble across that many so far. I guess they dont hunt at the places where I hang out.
I have the best fucking lawyers in the country including the man they call the Malmis.
forsooth
Profile Joined February 2011
United States3648 Posts
November 24 2011 12:09 GMT
#60
To those girls in this thread who feel it's important to split costs and pull your own weight so to speak in a relationship, I applaud you. The first couple of girls I dated when I got into my 20s and started being more independent had the traditional mindset that the onus was always on me to do everything. I had to move the relationship forward, pay for everything, etc. and in addition to keeping me broke it was also ultimately just a really soul-sucking experience to be with someone who it felt like never put any effort in and made the relationship all about what she could get out of it. The dumb thing was that I didn't even consciously realize it because I thought that was how things were supposed to work. After all, it was what my mom had taught me. I need to step up and be the man and learn how to provide and all that. Back at the beginning of 2010 though I got into a relationship (after being single for a couple years) with another girl who nearly always insisted on going 50/50 and would often make these really nice gestures like showing up at my work to visit or randomly cooking me dinner. I can't express enough how much happier it made me to be involved in a relationship where there was some reciprocity going on. Ultimately we broke up but unlike some of my earlier relationships, I don't regret it. A lot of it was time well spent.
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