EPTThe sword has to be bought in the USA, no problem. Then they ship the sword to wherever the hell it is you live. No problem. Then it goes through customs, not the real customs though, a firm that does the applications, problem. Sorry we take 5 times as long as it took to ship it in to process it because we're busy. Now I was mad, so I started mailing them.
Date: Friday 9 September 2011 9.15am
To: RPC (Retarded Processing Company)
Subject: Information order CJ1556456
Dear sir/madam,
I ordered a sword from the USA 3 weeks ago, and it has been in your processing facilities for 2 weeks. I hope there weren't any problems. I sent you the proof of payment to help you with the process.
Date: Friday 9 September 2011 1:23pm
From: RPC (Retarded Processing Company)
Dear Sir,
We understand your concerns but it's completely normal, it's just really busy.
Date: Friday 9 September 2011 7:54pm
To: RPC
Dear sir/madam,
What a relief that you're all just taking over 2 weeks to process an item. I was afraid a zombie virus had taken over your firm but I'm glad it's just a busy period.
Oh my god wait, are you being held hostage? Oh fuck this is so bad. Send me back in code if it's the case. I will refer to you as RPC, you can refer to me as Big Tango Papa Roach Leader.
Hold on!
Date: Monday 12 September 2011 9:35am
From: RPC
Dear Big Tango Papa Roach Leader,
We are not being held hostage. Your package is still being processed.
Thanks for your patience.
Date: Monday 12 September 2011 7:36 pm
To: RPC
RPC this is Big Tango Papa Roach Leader,
Ok hold on there, I've contacted a private security unit composed of ex-SWAT team members. They will be wearing gas masks and will be armed with chainsaws in case there actually would be a zombie virus. Oh, and I would stay away from the South-North-East corner of the South-Western wall, I heard they'll blow it up and go in form there.
Date: Tuesday 13 September 9:58am
From: RPC
Dear sir,
We checked and there is no South-North-East corner of the South-Western wall. Having entire loads processing each day, we're really working as fast as we can. Please stop messaging us, your package will be delivered soon.
Date: Tuesday 13 September 6:33pm
To: RPC
This is Big Tango Papa Roach Leader for RPC
Having entire loads processing.
Message received. Do you think it would be best to use shotguns or assault rifles? Assault rifles are more precise but shotguns are better vs zombies if we can trust apocalyps movies, shotguns are estimated to cause 15 killed innocents compared to 14 with assault rifles (those things are really accurate these days).
Date: Wednesday 14 September 11:53am
From: RPC
Dear sir,
Your package has been processed and is on its way to its destination.
EDIT: Swordpicks can be found here: http://www.valyriansteel.com/shop/swords/ice-sword-of-eddard-stark/prod_9.html
I will upload some more when I actually receive it
You'll need to put that valyrian steel to good use ^^![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/CHckE.jpg)
