EPTThe rules are simple: 6 rounds, three of Starcraft 2, three of no-holds-barred MMA ring-fighting, with judges awarding points of a 15 item scale that includes agression, defense, macro, and kicking the other lad in the head. Where did I come in you ask? I had the honour of announcing some of the best players' entrances, and the horror of seeing up-close the downfall of some of the worst.
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When I say underground I sometimes mean literally
Matches take place in underground car parks, warehouses and abandoned houses throughout Europe, far from the eyes of legitimate organizers. This is no Dreamhack, you won't find anything close to a KeSPA here, and players compete on their own for glory and insane prize money, and they only wear make-up if they really want to.
My job? My job has been to announce the fighters as they enter whichever make-shift arena we are using, to build them up before they knock each other down. It's a fairly easy task, as I don't do the commentating, I just yell out names at the start of the match and make sure the machines are set up. Commentating is handled by a dark duo, who really know their stuff but tell me they can't make it on the casting scene because they've been repeatedly eclipsed by Tastosis' charismatic style and bank of knowledge. They know their Starcraft and can cast up a storm, but during the UFC portions of matches they'll frequently only be able to say 'OH GOD!' and 'That looked like it really really hurt', but we love em.
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These gentlemen know how to rock some facial hair
Competitors range greatly in ability, and I've seen all sorts. Bookies will tell you to bet on the jack-of-all-trades types, the ones with 125 APM and still able to throw a decent punch. This, I've seen, is a mistake. These 'jacks' end up out of energy scrambling to beat any opponent with actual skill in SC2 or MMA, then it's lights out, figuratively or literally. The MMA champions are usually worse, 1Aing into disaster in the hopes they can grapple their opponent for submissions, they end up confused when they lose out on points.
Me? I'd choose the SC2 pros every time. These aren't your usual "you've seen me in a round of 32" pros, they're the washed up dregs, the ones who fell out of the limelight because a winning streak went sour. Yeah they were winning cos they cannon-rushed but what of it? Now though they are forced to coach for scraps and try earning a living with us, in the black-market of eSports.Sure they look weak, especially compared to the recent wave of UFC specialists who flood the sport, but they always surprise. Who do you think knows instinctively a rush is coming AND how to deal with it, even when is left eye is swollen shut and he's drowsy from knocks to the head? Not a jack-of-all-trades, that's for sure! The guys who focus on UFC? They haven't even heard of Day[9]!
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It's true, this lad failed at 4-gating because he couldn't see his opponent attack his Artosis pylon
In the ring these SC2 nerds will surprise you too, cornered and scared for their lives they give almost as good as they get. At the last session there was a disturbing new development, coming from the SC2 nerds camp. Apparently some whiz-kid made makeshift real-life stims out of Red-Bull and the adrenaline gland of a tiger, and an SC2 pro on stims is a terror!
Things are moving fast, I believe they are looking to expand across Europe! I'll keep TL informed on all the new developments in this exciting new addition to the eSports catalogue!
