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On June 09 2011 07:34 Froadac wrote: She won't let me have a job because i"m not responsible enough.
It was a stupid power move on my part, I'll admit that. But I've proven in more than one way that I'm responsible enough for a house key.
I lost the housekey. I know it's in the house. I can find it in 15 minutes, but I admit my fault and got roasted.
If you are older then 15 then she has no right to tell you that you can't work, just so you know... I think you need to step up to the plate and act like a man, maybe she'll treat you like a man. Get a job, whether "mommy says so" or not, start being a productive member of the house by contributing funds for food, or even rent... and maybe she'll view you as something other then a liability.
Honestly, you shouldn't act like you've got it so bad... My dad made me work 20 hours a week at the Hotel he is a manager of by the time I was 13 years old. Dude paid me 8 quarters (yes, $2) for the week and thanked me for paying for the light bills.
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So you wound up finding it?
And making copies of a house key that your mother obviously thinks you're just going to lose again is possibly the worst idea you could have had.
So lets take a look from your moms POV
"My son is too irresponsible to have a house key. He stole the one I wanted to leave outside for him, and lost it. Gee, looks like I'm right. Oh, hey, now he's going to make copies to lose all around town so strangers can have a key to the front door of my house."
Yeah, I can't see why she would get so angry. Maybe she is going to steal your shit so you can realize the risk she feels she runs by having you have a house key. Theft, that is.
sorry dude.
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On June 09 2011 08:02 Gene wrote: Yeah, I can't see why she would get so angry. Maybe she is going to steal your shit so you can realize the risk she feels she runs by having you have a house key. Theft, that is.
Frankly, everyone in this story sounds like they're behaving really irrationally. That's why I think there's more to the story.
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Why the hell would your parents want to prevent you from getting into your own house? Your mom sounds like an absolute control freak, sorry. Even if you do lose the key (which you wouldn't of done if you had a key ring, too bad she took that from you), than just make another one. Not everything really fits, why is there a key on a piece of wood in your backyard that you have to use in the first place? To let people who want to rob your house in?
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but the few people that said you have to prove your responsibility are right. get a summer job. She probably doesn't want you to have a job as it will negatively affect your studies, despite the reasons she gives you. Summer's almost here, get crackin,.
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She has flat up told me "you can't have a job"
And gene, you make a point. I behaved irrationally. I did find the key, I lost the key INSIDE the house.
Both parties acted irrationally.
My move was a power move, yeah, I admit it. STupid to do.
Btw, because I'm not 18 she needs to sign my work permit, which she won't.
My behaviors were irrational. My train of thought was "I've dealt with it for 2 years correctly, I"ve asked, she still says no. This doesn't make sense. I am mad. You have said Im' incredibly irresponsible, rawr, screw you" Not a terribly responsible POV.
Then again, it seemed pointless being responsible and nothing changes.
DUK3, so I can't take it, and it can't be lost.
Although to be honest, me carrying around a key on a keychain is infinitely less risky than hiding it under the tablecloth to my back table.
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I'm sorry dude. Come back to TLHF and rage with us
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On June 09 2011 08:33 eshlow wrote: I'm sorry dude. Come back to TLHF and rage with us Haha. To be honest working out has helped me with a lot of stress But still :/
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You were in the right and you're a kid man, don't worry about it too much. Sometimes you just gotta remind those parents that someday you'll be making decisions for them when they get old and senile. If parents behave too irrationally too often reality tends to hit them real hard when they realize their kids are never coming back after 18.
Sadly parents are allowed to be wrong and yet right, if only they were like a boss at work and actually paying us straight up for that privilege!
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=) I've locked myself in the spare bedroom. So I"ll just study in peace.
Well, I was right in principle, wrong in practice (I should be allowed to have a key, but I didn't approach it right, I guess)
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She's stay at home, she just takes my brother places. So no dice.
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how old is your brother/are you the first child? maybe your mom got some overprotective complex after dealing with all your body metal issues over the years (plus you're little and look about 11 iirc), idk how long that was going on for but by 17 you should have had a summer job and been able to drink milk. you're rich right, maybe it's also some privileged overprotective stay-at-home mom thing.
shit can only get better or worse, its entirely up to you to control it.
i suggest you suck it up and focus on the things you've learnt to enjoy without wasting energy on the crap that pulls you down. if you stress about something like this itll fuck with your mental health too (as you've noticed), you cant go through life letting shit get you down coz you'll end up with anxiety issues.
be cool
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Yeah. Just ignore it :/
We're relatively well to do, but poor for the area. She's real overprotective, yeah, but there are other issues.
She didn't actually take anything, just won't talk to me which is fine with me...
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Wow, life without a computer - that's gonna suck =/
Just focus on your finals for now.
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On June 09 2011 09:46 Thrill wrote: Wow, life without a computer - that's gonna suck =/
Just focus on your finals for now. ? I have the computer.
And yes, finals focus. Only one more day.
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hahahaha she might have taken your computer :D
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I'm back home. She didn't take anything.
Well, that I"ve noticed yet.
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On June 09 2011 09:57 Froadac wrote: I'm back home. She didn't take anything.
Well, that I"ve noticed yet. Go lay down on your bed, only to crash to the ground after you realize she stole a leg.
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Wow, you guys seem a little wacky.
When most people would take the normal route your house decides to drive on the pavement!
If you could find the key in 15min why didn't you? Seems a hell of lot easier and cheaper than getting keys cut? Seems like you have trouble balancing risk/reward which is probably why your mum doubts your responsibility.
As for the work thing, there are ways to prove your responsible without taking time away from study. This is especially true if your mother doesn't want you to.Have you asked your mum what she would consider responsible behaviour?
I can't help but feel that your mother is just really frustrated with you which is why she lashed out. I mean if she has put processes in place to keep things under control and you circumvent them, then obviously she is going to be upset. She probably didn't take your stuff because that would achieve nothing.
I'm sorry mate but this just seems to be a clasic case of teenage rebellion with no understanding of the consequences behind your actions. From what you have written there is nothing to suggest that you can be that responsible young adult that she feels you need to be before you can have your key. You have to show her you can be responsible, and the only way to do that is to find out what she deems being reponsible.
Good luck with your finals!
Edit:
On June 09 2011 08:49 Divinek wrote: You were in the right and you're a kid man, don't worry about it too much. Sometimes you just gotta remind those parents that someday you'll be making decisions for them when they get old and senile. If parents behave too irrationally too often reality tends to hit them real hard when they realize their kids are never coming back after 18.
Sadly parents are allowed to be wrong and yet right, if only they were like a boss at work and actually paying us straight up for that privilege!
I don't understand this point. How is he in the right? We don't know why she won't give him a key. She may have very good reasons. Hell we know he loses stuff, he managed to lose the key he wasn't supposed to take.
Yes she may have over-reacted regarding the key cutting but surely this is out of frustration. If you specifically tell your child not to do something, then they go ahead and do it anyway, won't you be pissed? As for looking after them later in life, this guy is a teenager, he clearly is not acting reponsibly, he has his whole life to grow up and show some maturity. The whole point of setting boundaries is to teach children that you cannot always get what you want. You have to earn it. I would bet a bucket-load of E-Sports dollars that there is a specific reason why Mr Froadac is not allowed a house key.
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