Thanks for the advice. My study habits have really gone downhill once I made the transition from high school to college. I fucked up my first quarter, and I did vow to do better during second quarter, especially after some harsh words from my parents. So far, second quarter has been going quite decent except for this major fuck up.
Also to clarify, out of the previous 2 labs that I missed, one of them was due to a snow day shutting down the school on the day of the lab, so I wasn't sure if I had to make up that lab or not. The other was just due to negligence. Nevertheless, I do agree that I fucked up too much by missing these labs so carelessly.
I've simply been too careless with college. High school was tough and competitive, and having relatively tough parents helped me pull through it quite decently. However, I've been really taking too many liberties with the greater number of freedoms in college, and it's really costing me. I wish I had gotten my shit together much earlier....
Hopefully, my pleas to the lab instructor will not fall on deaf ears.
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On March 03 2011 14:58 Manifesto7 wrote:Show nested quote +On March 03 2011 14:39 Kurr wrote:
Motivation is not such an easy thing to find sometimes. Granted, there's no one to blame but himself and he probably knows it best, but I can greatly sympathize with him.
I'm in my 6th year in university and I've had my fair share of trouble as well because of motivation. I spent 3 years in pharmacy school and dropped out recently because of my bad grades (motivation issues when it came to studying for big exams). I tried really hard to get myself to study and even prepared schedules for myself to do well, but in the end I was literally falling asleep in my books instead of learning.
I wasn't speaking so much about motivation as being personally accountable. From his post where he says that the "bulk of his regret" is sleeping in today, it tells me that he doesn't clearly see the result of all his actions. My suggestion is that he reflect on that in order to make real change.
I think I made a mistake by saying "bulk of my regrets." Indeed, at the moment I was most concerned about the fact that I slept in, especially since I was trying to find a fix for my immediate problem of trying to scrape out a make-up lab with the professor.
I do ponder my fuck-ups during first quarter quite a bit, especially after realizing how deep a hole I had dug for myself upon getting notified about my probation. I hoped to change this quarter, but alas I had grown too complacent and allowed myself to make too many mistakes. Every day I wake up hoping to climb out of this deep hole, but with this major slip up, I realize that my mentality has not improved enough.
I really wish I had a time machine right now.
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It sounds to me like you, Eviltomahawk, aren't really "into" college. You should think about that. Let's assume that's the case. Why are you in college if you aren't into it? Is it pressure from family? Is it social expectations? In all honesty, most people are in college for one reason: they believe a degree will enable them to make more money. And, statistically, it's true that you are more likely to make more money if you go to college. At least that has been the case historically... but many people are finding that they graduate college with a lot of debt, and an inability to find employment.
Anyhow, getting to my personal opinions: money isn't everything. So often, people think money is a means of attaining freedom. But the widespread addiction to money is the opposite of freedom, and it is far easier to become liberated by learning to need and want less. My feeling is that school should be for those who are driven to learn in an academic environment (many can learn better on their own, and for far less money). Most people in college really don't belong there, and they are only there because they want upward mobility. It's sad, because really college has very little to do with the practical skills involved in most jobs, but that's the way it is.
Anyway, perhaps it's the case that if you really cared about academics, you would be attending your classes and labs, and getting better academic results. The fact that you are struggling is probably a sign that you aren't really into what you are doing. So why not consider what it is that you DO want to do, and just go do that? Don't let family and friends and society as a whole dictate what you should do. YOU are the one that has to live your life, so make choices that suit you. Not everyone is destined to be a college graduate. Some of the smartest, most decent folks you can meet have not graduated college. Maybe some of these folks make less money than they would if they had graduated college. Then again, some of the happiest, most balanced people I know have very little money.
So if you quit college, you may feel guilty because you don't know what it is that drives you, or what you want to do. That's ok. That would be something you'd have in common with a LOT of people. So why not just relax and explore and try things out? And also, why not slack a little bit? Our society puts so much emphasis on work and achievement, but in the long run, money is just money, and fame is fleeting. In the long run, no one is remembered. Why not slow down and enjoy the simple things?
I went to college and graduated, and frankly, in many ways, I wish I had not. The one thing I really got out of college is a shallow sort of confidence; if I hadn't gone, I might feel intimidated by those who had degrees, and feel I had cheated myself or that I was lacking something important. Now I know fully well that if I had never gone to college, it would be perfectly alright, and I'd be a perfectly respectable, decent person anyway. But for that silly sort of confidence, I am now in debt to the tune of 17000 USD. I'm not the sort of person that wants a lot of money, and certainly not the sort of stress and BS that goes with earning a lot of money. I'm happy - not just content, but HAPPY - living on about 6 or 7 thousand USD a year. I'll likely never pay my debt down with the kinds of low stress, low pay jobs I am willing to work (and I purposely spend much time unemployed so that I can enjoy life), so it follows me around.
If you are motivated in college, and enjoy it, then I say more power to you. IT sounds like you are not, so I encourage you to cut your losses and simply live your life without a sense of pressure or obligation. In this way, perhaps with time you'll find something worth your efforts.
Nick / InkMeister
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EPT
