I'm sure all of you are excited about the release of SC2. But as the excitement of SC is understandably justified (11 years of waiting), I've come to recently know a girl that's taken my eyes off SC in general :p
Now, before you scream at me for committing heresy to the highest degree, let me tell you how we got to know each other. I knew her since elementary school and had always had a crush on her *-* But by that time, I was a simple little boy who did not know anything and moved to another city. After numerous years and becoming a senior, I get a FB message one day from this girl who I haven't seen in years. Anyway, to make a long story short we chatted a bunch through MSN and AIM (webcam, etc yes yes I'm lame), but I finally got the guts to ask her out this week.
My question to you guys is: What should I do? I have no dating experience whatsoever, but my thoughts were to take her to the movies (watching Inception which I hear is epically epic), then take her to get a drink at the mall where the theater is and just window-shop (i is broke). I was also thinking of taking her to this one place which has awesome boba/fruit drinks (yes, I'm asian) but that place closed down. However, there are still lots of places to hang about at that plaza (it's FOB central).
What's your take on what I should do? I know I haven't had much experience with girls and such, but I seriously like her and would like her to enjoy her time with me if I can make that possible :p Thanks for your advice TL!
Honestly, I don't think it matters too much where you go. Just make sure to be courteous, make her laugh, don't check your cellphone too much, never text someone else, be engaging, and just Show Who YOU Are.
And if you are the awesome guy we know you are, then everything will turn out fine and she'll be wanting a second date very soon
If you see inception make sure you understand the plot line before you go so you don't look stupid by not understanding it, personally I would advise skipping Inception in favor of renting Black Dynamite. Besides that just be yourself, have fun, don't be nervous.
imo movies arent very good for first dates. not a lot of talking, both of you are focused on the movie instead of each other. its ok for later dates though, just not first. i took a white chick out to an exotic asian restaurant and she loved it (she was into that stuff), and we had a lot to talk about cuz i could explain all this cool stuff to her about the different foods. it's good for conversation starters, and itll often lead to other subjects that will get you two talking (which is what you want).
after that, we danced in the rain (it was raining reaallly hard). we only had 1 umbrella, which was a good thing lol.
ok this might sound like shitty and half-assed advice. It is. However, you should trust me, this is very legitimate advice. It doesn't matter what you do, just don't be nervous. Be cool, collect, and show that you are confident and comfortable with her. For a first date, movies are really lame to be honest. Do something where you guys can interact together, boba is good, but I'd say something more like bowling with drinks, or a beach trip.
Dang, thought I'd be the first response, but looks like everyone basically said the same thing. Fuck going to the movies It's more of a thing to do after you guys already like each other, and have established a connection, or just something you'd go to with a friend.
Movies, especially epic, complicated and heavy movies like Inception can be OK if you both like it and can have an animated discussion about it afterwards.
Remember, its not really WHAT you do that is important, its the level and quality of your interaction that counts.
I know its summer, but Ice Skating is imo an excellent date 'thing to do'.
[If you can't skate, then stop whatever you're doing right now, find someone who can, drag them to the nearest rank and force them to teach you for hours-straight]
Here's why:
Ice skating is a physical activity. If you're not at the stage to hold hands or bash into eachother maybe its not the best activity. Its quite nice though because falling flat on your ass is a very A. humbling and B. funny experience [tho she could possible get hurt].
As long as she's confident enough to not only stick to the walls and let you guide/lead you its great. If you're capable of course, you can A. show off B. help her/support her/take care of her (girls absolutely adore this type of attention) and C. Embarrass yourself. If you can at some point look quite silly, it'll really relax her because at least she looks better than one guy on the ice.
What you'll need to balance is making her look good (+ +), to some extent making yourself look bad to make her more comfortable and look good (+), but not actually embarrassing her by falling very badly/being awkward ( ' ^^ whoops I touched you there and you feel uncomfortable o well ' ) and not making a scene.
Girls like guys that are funny, humble (can take a fall), who are real and not stuck-up assholes (do not be all "yeah Imma uber sk8ter check out teh skillz" -> fail), who take care of them and help them (please for the love of God don't laugh AT her. laughing at yourself is good and fine, but you'll make her feel uncomfortable and inadequate if you 'demean' her by laughing at her), and lastly who are generally good-natured and fun to be around. GL HF
Be interesting, don't just say things like 'That was a cool movie ehh?'. Look at the movie in depth and show some intelligence instead of just pointing out cool scenes afterwards. Maybe read up on some interesting facts about the movie and impress her. Too many people think that going to the movies is a free easy date.
Main thing is to be talkative, funny, intelligent, etc. Girls love that. It's only your first date, keep it simple.
I'm guessing you moved back and are far away anymore?
Anyways, you can really do anything. Dinner and a movie is normal and fine. But you can do things like going to the park, going bowling, really you can do anything. I liked this one girl and I rented a plane (I have my pilots license) and flew her over her house and shit which she really enjoyed.
On July 27 2010 05:53 bITt.mAN wrote: GO ICE SKATING!
Movies, especially epic, complicated and heavy movies like Inception can be OK if you both like it and can have an animated discussion about it afterwards.
Remember, its not really WHAT you do that is important, its the level and quality of your interaction that counts.
I know its summer, but Ice Skating is imo an excellent date 'thing to do'.
[If you can't skate, then stop whatever you're doing right now, find someone who can, drag them to the nearest rank and force them to teach you for hours-straight]
Yeah, I've read everywhere (google nerd) that movies are bad first-dates. But bleh! Haha. I was reallly excited to take her to Disneyland with my friends (cuz it's a group thing) but my parents are really anal about the $$$ involved (hence, being asian). Haha, I'll try to be myself and show her my dry, witty humor :p
@caucasianasian: Nahh, I'm still far away but we both can drive finally. ^^
Yes, another dating help blog. Emphasis on nerds being mostly men, around teenager years =.=
Edit: I was also thinking about taking her to walk around the beach and just checking out stores and stuff! But that seems kind of far and more serious of an outing :\
Don't go to a movie. It's two+ hours of silence and you'll probably end up discussing it with her. She could do that with her friends. Start off with dinner and wine :3
You're going to get bogged down with shitty advice here. It doesn't matter where you go. If you think you will enjoy a movie and drinks with her, then go for it. 70% of attracting is a girl is demonstrating confidence, so just be confident in yourself and your decisions.
On July 27 2010 06:06 moon` wrote: Haha thanks for the advice everyone!
Yeah, I've read everywhere (google nerd) that movies are bad first-dates. But bleh! Haha. I was reallly excited to take her to Disneyland with my friends (cuz it's a group thing) but my parents are really anal about the $$$ involved (hence, being asian). Haha, I'll try to be myself and show her my dry, witty humor :p
@caucasianasian: Nahh, I'm still far away but we both can drive finally. ^^
Yes, another dating help blog. Emphasis on nerds being mostly men, around teenager years =.=
Edit: I was also thinking about taking her to walk around the beach and just checking out stores and stuff! But that seems kind of far and more serious of an outing :\
Honestly a movie is alright provided you do something where you are interacting as well. It also has the benefit of not being intimidating. If you go for dinner or do something that is very intimate on the first date it could end up being awkward if she isn't a really sociable person. My fave first date ideas are stuff like bowling or mini-golf, where the interaction is there, but you have something fun to do as well.
Also, read chills advice. Thinking about this shit too much isn't good for anyone.
yea I would suggest not going to movies on first date. I think on first date you guys need to have a lot of talking, a lot of that feeling of "being together" if know what I mean. Watching a movie, especially inception which is like 2.5 hours long, after the movie you guys are gonna be confused and exhausted and she'll probably just want to go home. After the first date however, going to the movies may be a good idea because you've grown more comfortable with each other and a date without a lot of talk seems more acceptable too.
window-shopping? SERIOUSLY? ............... god I can't stress enough how this thing annoys me when girls do it and I never thought I would see a guy who's willing to do it. Yea, I know (I HOPE) it's because you want to get the girl, but come one!
Other than that your plan seems to be ok. ieatkids5 is kinda right about the movies but i don't think it's big deal in your case as you know each other since elementary school. That is actually huge benefit because you have pretty good conversation starter.
I wish you good luck but I believe you don't even need it though she contacted you first, it seems like she enjoyed chatting with you via messengers and agreed to go out.. ethat means she's probably interested. Thing about it an hour before the date while being freaked out
Did you invite her yet? Think about something else, movies are great but like many people mentioned you should rather try and communicate with her first. So if you are not confident instead you should be looking for something part talking/part activity, like bowling or going out on a fun trip to see the whales or w/e else inhabits the area. This will help with being uncomfortable if you don't know what exactly to talk about.
On July 27 2010 06:14 ondik wrote: window-shopping? SERIOUSLY? ............... god I can't stress enough how this thing annoys me when girls do it and I never thought I would see a guy who's willing to do it. Yea, I know (I HOPE) it's because you want to get the girl, but come one!
It works if you're the one who wants to shop. Clothes and fragrances are good for it.
Hmm.. well that's why I wanted to go drinking boba with her.. to get some interaction going :\ Yes, yes movies are "bad" but it's little pressure for both parties.
ANYWAY, idk about TL advice being bad I liked the first few posts Thanks for feedback.
Edit: Oh, and by window shopping I meant just walking around looking at stuff and talking. Don't see what's so bad about that o-O
If you aren't experienced I would definitely not recommend a movie. You'll most likely just be awkward and quiet the whole time, before, during, and after, and that sucks and kills the mood for the rest of whatever you have planned. "Little pressure" is kind of like boring and not memorable tbh
Then again that's just me :D I hate talking during movies
edit: as for window-shopping, a little bit on the lame side but who knows?
On July 27 2010 08:44 Kyuukyuu wrote: If you aren't experienced I would definitely not recommend a movie. You'll most likely just be awkward and quiet the whole time, before, during, and after, and that sucks and kills the mood for the rest of whatever you have planned. "Little pressure" is kind of like boring and not memorable tbh
Then again that's just me :D I hate talking during movies
edit: as for window-shopping, a little bit on the lame side but who knows?
^haha yeah. :p any idea where a good place would be? maybe a park, but idk wtheck we'd do =.=
What Chill said. Just be confident (she won't bite you) smile a lot and be yourself. Wherever you decide to go remember the most important thing: You're there to have fun, not because she's the only girl in the world for you and you need to secure your future with her.
I remember when I was going on my first date ever and taking the girl to a movie, a friend of mine (also a girl) just said, "You're taking her somewhere where you don't talk to each other for a hour and a half? Are you stupid?" Lol, I dunno, that date was such a disaster I erased it from my memory but I thought I'd share that quote.
Dinner and a movie is always good. Don't listen to people who say movies are terrible -.- Unfortunate that your broke, borrow 50-60 bucks from your parents? lol You have a nice dinner go to the movie and the other stuff you mentioned will be fine. As long as you have a good time. I'm speaking from experience. Let us know how it turns out Just don't be awkward lol
I will also add. Yes Yes people talking is important *rolls eyes* thats what dinner, before the movie, after the movie ect. are for. Movie also gives you something to TALK about afterwards. lol
Movies sound great, and maybe dinner after that. I think this girl really likes you. I mean, she sent an fb message after not seeing each other for a very long time. Hopefully it works out between u 2
Since she went out of her way to message you on FB after years of losing contact, I think your options are good. As for date ideas, that boba place probably would have been good. But you said it yourself, that plaza has a lot of good fobby things. Trust your own instincts here and take her there!! Then you can ask her if she's watched Inception and take her to the movies. I assume you're a senior and you drive. (But you're broke.) Go borrow some money and good luck.
On July 27 2010 13:22 nayumi wrote: Ask her to join you watching SPL PO between SKT and [Insert name of loser] :/
That's romance for me ...
I've been doing this with my girlfriend every saturday And she translates the winner interviews for me too <3 She's just the best <-- can't stress this enough
PS: Sorry for Hijack =[
On topic: Movies aren't necessarily bad for a first date... First date with my current gf was a movie, although circumstances may apply in different scenarios.
However the movie you suggested might not be the best... If the flick is THAT good (haven't seen it yet) you're either:
A) Be too into each other and not watch the movie B) Be too into the movie and not her >_> but of course you still get to talk to her before and after so it really is up to you.
also, fuck what everyone else thinks man (yes, even me) The only piece of advice you'll hear consistently is "Be yourself" that oughtta do it