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Please Critique My Commentary

Blogs > HDstarcraft
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1 2 Next All
HDstarcraft
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States577 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-04 11:58:00
April 04 2010 11:56 GMT
#1
Hey guys, I was wondering if you guys could take a look at my video and let me know how the tutorial/analyzation was. I'm looking to adopt a more analytical style of commentary, like the great Day9. Please give me some constructive criticism!




Starting Build Order: (This was on the youtube page)
9 Overlord
10 Drone
14 Pool
15 Hatch
14 Drone
15 Queen
17 Zerglings
(I messed up the order a bit in the video for the following 3)
18 Extractor
17 Overlord
17 Drone

**
YouTube.com/HDstarcraft
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-04 12:18:57
April 04 2010 12:08 GMT
#2
HD STARCRAFT! Hey man great channel! I love the joke u pulled on everyone wearing the korean mask. I've seen all your videos and I think ur a great commentator. Just stop Husky from not commentating the true SC:BW/SCII games and going to some 1st person shooter because then I and many others will stop watching his channel and his subscribers will leave him and go to his BF(u).

Now to the criticism. GJ I think u should do this sort of thing from only 1 persons view(in a rep) and tell people the exact BO and tell them why u build certain things and what u think when u see something with ur scout or when u see ur opponent's ovie etc. Also say why u may change something from the original plan(un less its really obvious like ur opponent's entire army nocking on ur door). Say all the standard transitions that u may go to and what MU(s) the BO is for. Other than that, GJ and I hope to see more stuff. O and, HAPPY EASTER!

edit: O and, don't try to please EVERYONE as thats impossible.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
baller
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
527 Posts
April 04 2010 12:17 GMT
#3
only watched the first 40 seconds, u say "basic" or "basically" five times

don't do this, its repetitive
floor exercise
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Canada5847 Posts
April 04 2010 12:32 GMT
#4
I like when you lose your queen but don't mention it while going back to self congratulate yourself on hydra micro
shindigs
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States4795 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-04 12:52:44
April 04 2010 12:52 GMT
#5
I learned quite a bit from that video in terms of how to react and how to transition. I do think the biggest piece of advice in any video is to "not panic" so I personally think it wouldn't be repetitive if you slipped that piece of advice once in a while in a dire situation (like when you lose 2 queens).

You did pretty good work on emphasizing the little things like keeping your eco up, balancing drones and units, and overall not to panic when you're opponent is at the door.

I think what would have been a great addition would be commentary on what to do in case your thought or strategy didn't work out as plan. What if you saw early aggression after your fast expansion? What if your opponent DID have a sizeable force when you were moving in (and you should have maybe hinted at that expo you were laying down when you had the advantage). You sort of stopped talking about the game when you already had it won, but I think you should remind the player on how to secure the advantage.

Overall, I think the amount of strategy you talked about covered a very diverse and broad spectrum of play and mechanics. You reminded the viewer of the small basic things that can turn the game around or gain a good early advantage (destroying rocks, remember to scout, don't panic, balance units and drones) as well as touched on higher level thoughts on play (Queen's transfusions ability, reacting to phoniex, pushing out at the right time). My biggest criticism is that you can always squeeze out more commentary on strategy in your videos, especially near the end of this one. Also, be sure to state alternatives to the situation in case a plan doesn't work out.

I wasn't expecting super uber in depth pro analysis like Day9, but I thing you really do a good job of implementing tidbits of more higher level strategy while covering the very basics in the game which is something you should continue to aim for.

Also you have a lovely voice.
Photographer@shindags || twitch.tv/shindigs
prosatan
Profile Joined September 2009
Romania9017 Posts
April 04 2010 15:02 GMT
#6
Basic, I like your voice
Lee JaeDong Fighting! The only church that illuminates is the one that burns.
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
April 04 2010 15:04 GMT
#7
On April 05 2010 00:02 prosatan wrote:
Basic, I like your voice

who doesn't like HD's voice? lol.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
HDstarcraft
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States577 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-04 22:00:48
April 04 2010 21:51 GMT
#8
On April 04 2010 21:08 3FFA wrote:
HD STARCRAFT! Hey man great channel! I love the joke u pulled on everyone wearing the korean mask. I've seen all your videos and I think ur a great commentator. Just stop Husky from not commentating the true SC:BW/SCII games and going to some 1st person shooter because then I and many others will stop watching his channel and his subscribers will leave him and go to his BF(u).

Now to the criticism. GJ I think u should do this sort of thing from only 1 persons view(in a rep) and tell people the exact BO and tell them why u build certain things and what u think when u see something with ur scout or when u see ur opponent's ovie etc. Also say why u may change something from the original plan(un less its really obvious like ur opponent's entire army nocking on ur door). Say all the standard transitions that u may go to and what MU(s) the BO is for. Other than that, GJ and I hope to see more stuff. O and, HAPPY EASTER!

edit: O and, don't try to please EVERYONE as thats impossible.


I prefer doing it in FPV, but I'll consider rep. Great feedback regarding talking about strategy if things don't go according to the original plan. Happy Easter to you too!

On April 04 2010 21:17 baller wrote:
only watched the first 40 seconds, u say "basic" or "basically" five times

don't do this, its repetitive


Yeah, my bad. Was hoping for more critique on the actual analysis though I'll keep this in mind

On April 04 2010 21:32 floor exercise wrote:
I like when you lose your queen but don't mention it while going back to self congratulate yourself on hydra micro


I wasn't looking to call out the play by play like I usually do. Otherwise I would have mentioned both the queen and phoenix dying.

On April 04 2010 21:52 shindigs wrote:
I learned quite a bit from that video in terms of how to react and how to transition. I do think the biggest piece of advice in any video is to "not panic" so I personally think it wouldn't be repetitive if you slipped that piece of advice once in a while in a dire situation (like when you lose 2 queens).

You did pretty good work on emphasizing the little things like keeping your eco up, balancing drones and units, and overall not to panic when you're opponent is at the door.

I think what would have been a great addition would be commentary on what to do in case your thought or strategy didn't work out as plan. What if you saw early aggression after your fast expansion? What if your opponent DID have a sizeable force when you were moving in (and you should have maybe hinted at that expo you were laying down when you had the advantage). You sort of stopped talking about the game when you already had it won, but I think you should remind the player on how to secure the advantage.

Overall, I think the amount of strategy you talked about covered a very diverse and broad spectrum of play and mechanics. You reminded the viewer of the small basic things that can turn the game around or gain a good early advantage (destroying rocks, remember to scout, don't panic, balance units and drones) as well as touched on higher level thoughts on play (Queen's transfusions ability, reacting to phoniex, pushing out at the right time). My biggest criticism is that you can always squeeze out more commentary on strategy in your videos, especially near the end of this one. Also, be sure to state alternatives to the situation in case a plan doesn't work out.

I wasn't expecting super uber in depth pro analysis like Day9, but I thing you really do a good job of implementing tidbits of more higher level strategy while covering the very basics in the game which is something you should continue to aim for.

Also you have a lovely voice.


Thanks, great feedback. I will definitely try to discuss more about alternative routes. As stated above, talking more about what would happen if things didn't go according to plan. The major hurdle I run into is that sometimes there's just not enough time to discuss the alternative strategies or go into detail. I was considering pausing games just to talk, (similar to d9), do you think this is something I should implement for these more analytical commentaries?

Lasly, do you really think I should continue talking about the game after it is over? I find alot of viewers tune out, but if this is something people want to hear its definitely doable.

Thanks again for the feedback, by far the best so far.

Thanks everybody, keep it coming. I know I still have ALOT of room to improve.
YouTube.com/HDstarcraft
shindigs
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States4795 Posts
April 04 2010 22:54 GMT
#9
In terms of alternative strategies, I think just mentioning them will be fine and you don't need to go into too much detail. You would want to focus what is actually happening while still acknowledging alternatives.

If you want to pause the game, make sure you are doing so to draw attention to positioning instead of pausing to just add more commentary. A paused game can be used to highlight the finer positional details and state of the minimap during your analysis.
Photographer@shindags || twitch.tv/shindigs
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
April 06 2010 00:25 GMT
#10
bumped for the purpose of more advice for the 2nd greatest commentator I know of(1st being day9 of course!). I think shindigs has some great advice for u HD. As was said, lovely voice. I think you should also make some vods of the same bo and state/show how to react when ur opponent comes out with a counter and how to react to cheese(proxy gates, void ray rush, mass pheonix). Also make sure that it is a BO(unlike the roach BO husky recently posted) that can be used up to platinum levels. I also think u should showcase the pro SCII that TL.net came up with.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
MountainDewJunkie
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States10346 Posts
April 06 2010 00:56 GMT
#11
Day[9] says fixations with build order details are unnecessary. Just explain the overall goals of the build or speculate in a general sense.
[21:07] <Shock710> whats wrong with her face [20:50] <dAPhREAk> i beat it the day after it came out | <BLinD-RawR> esports is a giant vagina
HDstarcraft
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States577 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-06 06:50:34
April 06 2010 06:48 GMT
#12
On April 06 2010 09:56 MountainDewJunkie wrote:
Day[9] says fixations with build order details are unnecessary. Just explain the overall goals of the build or speculate in a general sense.


Yeah I agree. I think in general I've been shoutcasting play by play for so long that it becomes very difficult to break away and get into deeper depth and meaning in SC2. Hopefully with more practice though I should get a bit better. It really does help to be a good player yourself though, which is why d9 is so good with his insight. I remember trying to get in depth in Broodwar, and I was completely lost lol.

Btw, thanks for the positive support 3ffa.
YouTube.com/HDstarcraft
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-06 14:55:16
April 06 2010 12:33 GMT
#13
On April 06 2010 15:48 HDstarcraft wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 06 2010 09:56 MountainDewJunkie wrote:
Day[9] says fixations with build order details are unnecessary. Just explain the overall goals of the build or speculate in a general sense.


Yeah I agree. I think in general I've been shoutcasting play by play for so long that it becomes very difficult to break away and get into deeper depth and meaning in SC2. Hopefully with more practice though I should get a bit better. It really does help to be a good player yourself though, which is why d9 is so good with his insight. I remember trying to get in depth in Broodwar, and I was completely lost lol.

Btw, thanks for the positive support 3ffa.

your welcome HD. Gonna go check ur and Husky's channels for more VODS in a bit. By the way, in your stalker trick video u should've given credit to Davee as it actually is called "Davee's Blink".

edit: ok I think u should also make some more of these VODS soon as more practice will make u better. You are currently practicing what u are the best at which is a play-by-play commentary. After your done with the league u should start doing these types of VODS again until another tourny happens.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
Bosu
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States3247 Posts
April 06 2010 16:19 GMT
#14
On April 06 2010 09:56 MountainDewJunkie wrote:
Day[9] says fixations with build order details are unnecessary. Just explain the overall goals of the build or speculate in a general sense.


I think the first 20-30 food of a build order is very important. I am sure a huge portion of huskys audience doesn't have beta or is pretty bad. Many of them may not know when to get gas, pool, hatchery etc.
#1 Kwanro Fan
k!llua
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Australia895 Posts
April 06 2010 16:45 GMT
#15
If you keep in mind who you're casting for - that is, you take into account the general skill level of the viewer that you want watching - then you shouldn't have any problems for analysis.

You can play the game and get better (than whatever level you currently are), which makes your casting more analytical (nal_ra made a point of this in the latest episode). Otherwise, consider:

- you're not going to be casting for professionals, since they're more likely to be playing in the game than watching it
- you're probably not aiming your casts at new players who don't understand the fundamentals

That leaves the middle, so you'll need:

- a brief coverage of the build order (supply on 9, rax on 11, hat 12, whatever they build it on)
- some predictions on how the strategy will unfold
- talk about mistakes that go on: not using energy, idle workers, poor micro, bad macro - which brings us onto another point

*** If you're watching a replay, then speed it up and slow it down where necessary. You don't need to see workers at the start mine in real-time, but you do want to slow it down mid-game to check players macro and see things that are going on mid-battles. If you want players to really understand what's going on in the game, then slow it down and show MORE of the game. Day[9] does this a lot, and if you think about it it makes perfect sense. ***

Now, that's just things for shoutcasting in general. As for the tutorial:

What you've done is pretty good. I think, however, it's even more important to slow the game down and reinforce how important it is to still be microing. You can say it, but it's much more effective if you slow the game down and show in the middle of a battle that you are actually building.

A lot of times players will die due to having a smaller army and not knowing why, so if you can plainly show them how it's possible - hotkeying (another thing you can harp on about, and something you missed during the commentary which was to explain what hotkeys you used, why you might use 5 instead of 0, etc) and using it mid-battle - then it sticks in the mind much more.

The important part is that like I said before: identify who you're casting to. You're doing a tutorial, so it's safe to assume that you're not casting to gold or platinum players in which case it makes sense to go more into depth on the build order.

But even without that video, if you can clearly point out what kind of person you're talking to (speak as if you're talking to one person, just like radio) then you can answer pretty much all the questions you need answered.

Incidentally, you seem like a pretty decent player. I wish I was that good, but that's my punishment for playing CS for 7 years instead of BW. I'm still holding out hope for that key though :D

(Did you hotkey your overlord at the start of the game?)
my hair is a wookie, your argument is invalid
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
April 07 2010 01:20 GMT
#16
tiny bump.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
Requisition
Profile Joined April 2010
United States97 Posts
April 07 2010 10:18 GMT
#17
One minor issue: It's pronounced zel-uht, not zel-lot.
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
April 07 2010 11:11 GMT
#18
On April 07 2010 19:18 Requisition wrote:
One minor issue: It's pronounced zel-uht, not zel-lot.

theres 2 pronunciations. Zealot("E" not "e") and zelot("e" not "E"). I personally don't understand why people get annoyed by it. Also HD and I pronounce banshees the came way. We say Bancheese.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
April 07 2010 15:23 GMT
#19
O also, I think u could learn a lot from the Latest SCII beta news- Strategy livestreaming. I think u could watch this and learn both 1) a new BO(WOOT WOOT zerg strat first and without roaches which I know u hate)and 2) TL's version of exactly what u are doing right now and u can probably learn from them. GL and HF with this! I hope u continue with this!
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
CharlieMurphy
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
United States22895 Posts
April 07 2010 23:38 GMT
#20
i don't agree with that build order.
..and then I would, ya know, check em'. (Aka SpoR)
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