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[Q] Can you REALLY change your personality? - Page 2

Blogs > Garnet
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n3m0
Profile Joined January 2007
Portugal247 Posts
November 18 2009 14:26 GMT
#21
Nah.. ppl can't really change their personality.. The closest thing to change your personality is faking it.

People are what they are.
Former WGT Clan League Admin - Former Portugal A team manager - Former member of MgZ) / iG. / LRM) - Starcraft Broodwar
jfazz
Profile Joined September 2009
Australia672 Posts
November 18 2009 14:37 GMT
#22
I just want to make a quick suggestion - there is a book called 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People'. I read it when I was quite young - I had many of the attributes your describe - and it gave me insight into how I dealt with the world - and I can tell you, I am a very different (and thankfully, successful) person now. You might like it, im sure the book wouldn't be hard to get a hold of.
Victory needs no explanation, defeat allows none
Piste
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
6183 Posts
November 18 2009 14:38 GMT
#23
personality can change. at least that has happened to me. So don't worry mate.
lone_hydra
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Canada1460 Posts
November 18 2009 15:07 GMT
#24
On November 18 2009 23:26 n3m0 wrote:
Nah.. ppl can't really change their personality.. The closest thing to change your personality is faking it.

People are what they are.


Wrong. If you can fake a personality long enough, it will become your normal personality. Personality is habits and attitudes exhibited by 1 person. If you decide to "fake" being nice for a year, you will fall into a habit of being nice and you will naturally be nice. If you do something or act differently consistently for a long time, it will not be different and it will be natural. This is the basis of how humans learn and grow.
Fav Gamers: 2)Stork 5)Bisu
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9036 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-11-18 15:25:11
November 18 2009 15:22 GMT
#25
On November 18 2009 23:37 jfazz wrote:
I just want to make a quick suggestion - there is a book called 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People'. I read it when I was quite young - I had many of the attributes your describe - and it gave me insight into how I dealt with the world - and I can tell you, I am a very different (and thankfully, successful) person now. You might like it, im sure the book wouldn't be hard to get a hold of.

Downloading. Thx for the suggestion, maybe it will be different from all the books I've read.
Piste
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
6183 Posts
November 18 2009 15:59 GMT
#26
On November 18 2009 23:26 n3m0 wrote:
Nah.. ppl can't really change their personality.. The closest thing to change your personality is faking it.

People are what they are.
Maybe if you sit on your ass in front of computer all day.
searcher
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
277 Posts
November 18 2009 16:01 GMT
#27
Anyone else come to this thread hoping for Planescape: Torment?

And of course your personality can change. Do the people who suggest otherwise seriously that no one over the age of 20 or whatever has changed their personality? Seriously? Most people who want to change don't manage to change it the way they want, but that's a different matter.
Heyoka
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Katowice25012 Posts
November 18 2009 16:02 GMT
#28
I benefited a lot when I started working out, and made a really conscious effort to develop good friendships with people of high self esteem. I don't know where I read it but I'm pretty sure that last part was a self help technique, finding people who have positive qualities and then learning from them how to act that way and why they do it.
@RealHeyoka | ESL / DreamHack StarCraft Lead
alexpnd
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Canada1857 Posts
November 18 2009 16:05 GMT
#29
On November 18 2009 21:03 Garnet wrote:
Two girls in class asked me a favor, and I replied I would do it, but somehow my actions later made them think I was annoyed,


This most likely represents your fear of true expression. Your not letting your nature insist because of a fear that you will not be taken seriously perhaps? Mental images are powerful you have to go through them and go through your scenario again and try to conjure up what you think really would have happened, or what has happened and you were just placing it there again.
www.brainyweb.ca //web stuff!
Cloud
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Sexico5880 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-11-18 16:25:35
November 18 2009 16:20 GMT
#30
I don't know dude, but you can't just change a single aspect of your life, your personality is an echo of everything else you are, your habits, your education, your friends. family and the people you look up to.

Now, why are you trying to change your personality? Because girls aren't falling for you at every corner? Because of your low self esteem? I also think it's rather weird to say that you have inherited a low self esteem from your parents, but anyway; Your procrastination can be fixed by setting up a schedule. A big self esteem or whatever isn't going to help you change that: boredom and self esteem have nothing to do with each other. I mean I know, in all of highschool I never studied more than 2 hours prior the exam. But setting a strict schedule based on tasks (not on time) helped me tremendously to change.

Then, what do you want to change into? You don't like being a people pleaser, I think one of the more obvious alternatives is, as has been said, not giving a fuck. Yet it has also been said that it leads you to being a narcissist. And, yes, sorry, unless you were a monk you can't have the best part of both sides.

As for the last part, so what the fuck if you're nerdy? There are millions others like you, a lot of them females (crazy I know), I think you're just annoyed because you feel subject to mock, aka. you have a low self esteem, yet I'm of the belief that a high self esteem is independent of what you are. A beggar can love himself, he can even have a high self respect (which ranks higher than his own self esteem) based purely on him following his own principles.

All this ranting aside, I think the place to start would be to change your procrastination. And you do that by well, doing something for a change. Reading books is quite the contrary in my opinion, because it's just looking for an idea that appeals you the most because you find it so hard to drastically change. As I have mentioned, try keeping a hard schedule. From setting a strict hour to wake up, and all the tasks you have to do in the next day (not the time you plan to give each of them), to the hour you decide is optimal for sleeping.
BlueLaguna on West, msg for game.
HwangjaeTerran
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Finland5967 Posts
November 18 2009 16:33 GMT
#31
I´m an optimist and think people can change their personalities, otherwise world is doomed, also I ´ve never known what I´m like so I´ve had to kinda create a personality.
https://steamcommunity.com/id/*tlusernamehere*/
Cloud
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Sexico5880 Posts
November 18 2009 16:51 GMT
#32
On November 19 2009 01:33 HwangjaeTerran wrote:
I´m an optimist and think people can change their personalities, otherwise world is doomed, also I ´ve never known what I´m like so I´ve had to kinda create a personality.


Isn't thinking that the world is doomed because people can't change pessimistic?
BlueLaguna on West, msg for game.
lejason
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
57 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-11-19 00:33:06
November 19 2009 00:31 GMT
#33
a lot of those aren't personality traits that your stuck with they are just sides of your personality that have gone sour or haven't been developed properly. you just need more confidence. experience will help you deal with that stuff as well, there isn't a quick solution for you other than to keep working on it consciously.
most importantly, and this is key, i would start focusing on the good aspects of your personality, there is a plus to anything you just need to find how to make it work for you. you got to learn to like yourself more and stop thinking that you inherently have a bad personality or else you'll get no where. subsequently you should stop acting like not you and be true to yourself; stop aiming to please so much, not that you shouldn't be nice, just don't be so deferential to your equals.
SkylineSC
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States564 Posts
November 19 2009 00:59 GMT
#34
lack of self-esteem is not entirely personality.

u just gotta do it. work hard and do it. grow some backbone and start saying no, start taking initiative.

don't expect some miracle that one day you are gonna be confident. its hard work, if it bugs you this much to be doormat all the time, then DO something about it. no secret
eshlow
Profile Joined June 2008
United States5210 Posts
November 19 2009 02:54 GMT
#35
Of course you can change personality.

Instill better habits.
Overcoming Gravity: A Systematic Approach to Gymnastics and Bodyweight Strength
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