I'm not amazing at controlling my emotions. Especially when playing starcraft. Especially when my life isn't running so smoothly, which atm it certainly isn't. No girlfriend, I just failed my preliminary medical exams, and my mother already got on my nerves by bitching at me, about how much it annoys her that I get up so late all the time etc.. The funny part being that she did this before I was even at home, I was still in Leipzig, the city at which I go to uni and hadn't even arrived at my parents house in berlin yet.
But I'm not here to bitch or whine, I just wanted to give a little introduction. So then I played a few iccup games, after a bit of thinking whether I should improve my ZvP (my best mu with an amazing solid D+ lvl..) or my ZvT (worst mu, D lvl). And I got pretty annoyed. I guess it was my fault for playing koreans but I got pwned by D players.. pretty bad. And not in a nice kind of way, but in a series of losing vs 3 different P players with everyone going 2 gate/proxy 2 gate against me. Then I played some more games, won against some really bad players, lost against some really bad players. And I thought to myself "Fuck, have I really not improved at all?" So then I played against another D+ korean Protoss (I see now he's C- with 27-18 stats) And despite getting into a good early game position I get completely pwned the rest of the game and it was just ugly.
So then I lose it. I walk to my bed and just pound my fists on them in pure anger, but only for about 1 second because then it happens. The head of my left upper arm pops out of my shoulder and I lie there in pain, while there's nobody else at home. So I'm rolling around, not really knowing what I'm doing, trying to get my arm in such a position that the head of my arm goes in there again.. it took a bit but after about 2 min it was back in there and I just thought "... Fuck I have a problem with anger control ..." Then I went back and played some more games.. I also lost some of them but when I did, I managed to not go berzerk over it...
So there kids, take this as a lesson, it's just not worth it to nerdrage.
I'm gonna call my friend now and tell I'm not gonna make it to playing football cause my shoulder still hurts too much :/
Go for an Anger Management :D Btw, try to get a normal life back. SC is good but girlfriend is Gold. And believe me, a girl can heal you more than what you can believe.
On August 26 2009 18:35 Perguvious wrote: shit, that happens if you pound on the bed?! I do that all the time when I lose to 4pool.
never hitting anything other than people again
Well it's not the first time I dislocated my shoulder, if it happened to you once, its much more likely to happen again. First time was in a skiing accident.
On August 26 2009 18:36 MK wrote: Go for an Anger Management :D Btw, try to get a normal life back. SC is good but girlfriend is Gold. And believe me, a girl can heal you more than what you can believe.
Sounds like your nerdrage was %100 warranted. I'm sorry to hear about your problems and can relate in many ways; has me pretty depressed. I tend not to rage rather than /wrists a lot.
Lol I just checked bwchart and one of the D guys I lost to in the losing spree had a pretty amount of apm: 395 and is 11-0 in Iccup. I know some noobs spam like crazy but man 395 average is a lot...
The one I lost to after that is 9-0 And probably also way better than D... so I guess no wonder I got pwned ( http://www.iccup.com/matchlist/680671/1x1.html I think Sooos is the guy who made my dislocate my shoulder ^^)
I've also experienced very very big nerdrage in my past (especially when I was younger) and I broke like countless gamepads and been called sore loser too many times...so I understand you comepletely. But as I grew older I just stoped nerdrageing and my gameplay improved like many times over and I don't nerdrage anymore (just swear on loud) if I get really frustrated..
Only thing I ever broke was mice, I haven't broken any since I started using optical mice. But oooooh did I break ball-mice, they'd get dirty and I'd slam them on the desk as hard as I could instead of cleaning them.
... what kind of bed takes your abuse? You should really consider the beds feelings before acting out O.o I bet the bed gets you back in your sleep though! :D
Also terribly terrible nerd rage stories needs more idra !
you dislocated your shoulder and you didnt see a doctor? =/
dislocation is very serious man, your shoulder is going to be all fucked up if you keep nerdraging (not to mention youll be sleeping on the floor if you keep bashing the shit out of your bed)
On August 26 2009 21:17 JohnColtrane wrote: you dislocated your shoulder and you didnt see a doctor? =/
dislocation is very serious man, your shoulder is going to be all fucked up if you keep nerdraging (not to mention youll be sleeping on the floor if you keep bashing the shit out of your bed)
Lol I don't plan to keep on bashing my bed, I'm already playing again getting bashed by koreans without nerdraging. And no there's no point in seeing a doctor, my shoulders pretty much fine again.
Wow... I've never broken any appendage, I've only smashed keyboards sideways over the top of the monitor. Keys fly everywhere, but I always use bad boards for playing SC
On August 26 2009 23:29 Hawk wrote: you have to be a pretty weak nerd to pop out your shoulder by punching a bed
I have a pretty muscular body, believe me if you dislocate your shoulder once, it can happen again because of some really ridiculous things. Once I was at the beach and made a handstand in the water , meaning I was slow as fucking, bam dislocated shoulder.
On August 26 2009 23:29 Hawk wrote: you have to be a pretty weak nerd to pop out your shoulder by punching a bed
I have a pretty muscular body, believe me if you dislocate your shoulder once, it can happen again because of some really ridiculous things. Once I was at the beach and made a handstand in the water , meaning I was slow as fucking, bam dislocated shoulder.
This incident was the 4th time.
This is true. I dislocated mine a long time ago (sports injury) and for the longest time after it would pop out really easily. One time i grabbed milk from my fridge and due to the height of the shelf and weight of the milk my shoulder popped out and i spilled it all over the floor. Yes, milk.
After awhile though i think the muscle builds back because it hasn't happened in a long time now. I just remember it hurting like crazy for a few seconds when its dislocated and then you pop it back in and sometimes you cant even tell it happened cause the pain is gone.
Anyways, i guess its kinda embarrassing hurting yourself from nerdrage..but we all rage to some degree i think ^_^
Madden and Cruis N USA are the only games that make me nerdrage, because the AI is such fucking stupid bullshit. Actually, that was only when I was younger. Now I just laugh it off and hate my life.
I get so angry sometimes, especially when i die due to my own mistakes. I play Terran, and I guess terran players in general are easily angered. I never met a protoss user who slams his fist on the keyboard when loosing. He is like "oh...well I'll just play another game".
Also I think good (fast) players in general get easily in rage mode because the game depletes their mental resources, especially high APM terran users. And when they die to "stupid" shit shit just hits the fan! It's not that fun to have 4 times the amount of actions than your opponent just to die to some retarded carrier rush strategy that the protoss executed with 80 apm ROFL
On August 26 2009 23:29 Hawk wrote: you have to be a pretty weak nerd to pop out your shoulder by punching a bed
I have a pretty muscular body, believe me if you dislocate your shoulder once, it can happen again because of some really ridiculous things. Once I was at the beach and made a handstand in the water , meaning I was slow as fucking, bam dislocated shoulder.
This incident was the 4th time.
I've dislocated mine a few times. You don't dislocate your shoulder by hitting a bed unless you're a total fairy.
On August 26 2009 23:29 Hawk wrote: you have to be a pretty weak nerd to pop out your shoulder by punching a bed
I have a pretty muscular body, believe me if you dislocate your shoulder once, it can happen again because of some really ridiculous things. Once I was at the beach and made a handstand in the water , meaning I was slow as fucking, bam dislocated shoulder.
This incident was the 4th time.
I've dislocated mine a few times. You don't dislocate your shoulder by hitting a bed unless you're a total fairy.
Lol do you need proof or sth? I could see if I still have the pic of my upper body for the TL fitness initative thread, although that seems a little gay My father has had similar problems, one time they had to put him under narcosis to move his arm back in. I hope I'll always be able to do that by myself.
There, I'm no incontrol but I wouldn't consider myself a fairy either
On August 27 2009 02:28 Foucault wrote: wow I can totally relate to the OP
I get so angry sometimes, especially when i die due to my own mistakes. I play Terran, and I guess terran players in general are easily angered. I never met a protoss user who slams his fist on the keyboard when loosing. He is like "oh...well I'll just play another game".
Also I think good (fast) players in general get easily in rage mode because the game depletes their mental resources, especially high APM terran users. And when they die to "stupid" shit shit just hits the fan! It's not that fun to have 4 times the amount of actions than your opponent just to die to some retarded carrier rush strategy that the protoss executed with 80 apm ROFL
Yeah I hate it the most when I'm for example in a great position, firmly in the lead but then suddenly a group of m&m appears out of nowhere right at my 3rd (not even using a dropship), takes it down although I have 2 times a bigger army than him because I'm too freaking stupid to scout and see his attack coming.
Today I got pwned by koreans again, I took it pretty well :p
On August 26 2009 23:29 Hawk wrote: you have to be a pretty weak nerd to pop out your shoulder by punching a bed
I have a pretty muscular body, believe me if you dislocate your shoulder once, it can happen again because of some really ridiculous things. Once I was at the beach and made a handstand in the water , meaning I was slow as fucking, bam dislocated shoulder.
This incident was the 4th time.
I've dislocated mine a few times. You don't dislocate your shoulder by hitting a bed unless you're a total fairy.
Lol do you need proof or sth? I could see if I still have the pic of my upper body for the TL fitness initative thread, although that seems a little gay My father has had similar problems, one time they had to put him under narcosis to move his arm back in. I hope I'll always be able to do that by myself.
On August 26 2009 23:29 Hawk wrote: you have to be a pretty weak nerd to pop out your shoulder by punching a bed
I have a pretty muscular body, believe me if you dislocate your shoulder once, it can happen again because of some really ridiculous things. Once I was at the beach and made a handstand in the water , meaning I was slow as fucking, bam dislocated shoulder.
This incident was the 4th time.
I've dislocated mine a few times. You don't dislocate your shoulder by hitting a bed unless you're a total fairy.
Lol do you need proof or sth? I could see if I still have the pic of my upper body for the TL fitness initative thread, although that seems a little gay My father has had similar problems, one time they had to put him under narcosis to move his arm back in. I hope I'll always be able to do that by myself.
On August 27 2009 04:47 Licmyobelisk wrote: come on man, don't play korean hours it's really frustrating. You should play it if you really have the patience.
Yeah but the problem is that during korean hours is the time I feel most like playing (noon in germany) Today I at least won 1 out of 5 games vs koreans lol But today I deserved to lose because I played very bad. And the thing is I can surely beat true D/D+ koreans if I don't fukc up like I did today but somehow I often end up playing people who are actually at least C- or better (like the 395 apm guy ^^)
Stop for a second and think about why you're losing those games. Once you know what you need to improve, I think you'll find SC a lot more fun. It's when you lose and you feel like there's nothing you could have done that it feels shitty. At D-C level, it's never just about having better macro or micro. It's more about knowing what to do.
As for anger management... Don't practice catharsis. It's bullshit and it doesn't work. Try breathing exercises or something.
Basically your main problem is that you don't think about your surroundings rationally. And don't pull this 'life is really stressful for me right now.' It's just an excuse you're making for yourself. Really, almost everyone is always has something to be stressed about. It's not justification for destructive behaviour.
On August 27 2009 05:03 Chef wrote: Stop for a second and think about why you're losing those games. Once you know what you need to improve, I think you'll find SC a lot more fun. It's when you lose and you feel like there's nothing you could have done that it feels shitty. At D-C level, it's never just about having better macro or micro. It's more about knowing what to do.
As for anger management... Don't practice catharsis. It's bullshit and it doesn't work. Try breathing exercises or something.
Basically your main problem is that you don't think about your surroundings rationally. And don't pull this 'life is really stressful for me right now.' It's just an excuse you're making for yourself. Really, almost everyone is always has something to be stressed about. It's not justification for destructive behaviour.
Well I usually, at least most of the time do figure out why I lost, either because of an obvious mistake ingame or if I have no clue I go watch the replay. I think I'm just not playing regularly enough to really improve, during the semester I often didnt play more than like 3 games a week, although that might change cause I'll have a lot of free time in the next 6 months... Today for example I asked that one korean guy who pwned me, despite his incredibly bad english he managed to give me a very simple answer to how I would have beaten his build: "you muta, I lose" :p
Calling what I did "catharsis" is quite the euphemism I think, and of course I'm aware it's stupid, the pain made it more obvious than anything that it was stupid ^^ But I disagree with you about it not having to do with your general mood at the time. I never ever had issues with aggression like that until about 2 years ago, so when I was 18/19 (no late puberty jokes plz :p) And even when I had just phases in which I was generally in a healthy state of mind, losing games didn't get to me as much. But now I just generally get angry much easier, and it's not too hard to link that to frustrations and anger because of events that have happened in my rl the last few years. Although I'm only like this when I'm alone, I'm very peaceful around people ^^
The Western "vent your anger" advice presumes that through aggressive action or fantasy we can achieve emotional release, or catharsis. Experimenters report that sometimes when people retaliate against a provoker, they may indeed calm down. But this tends to be true only if their counterattack is directed against the provoker, if their retaliation seems justifiable, and if their target is not intimidating (Geen & Quanty, 1977; Hokanson & Eldman, 1966). In short, expressing anger can be temporarily calming if it does not leave us feeling guilty or anxious.
It goes on to list more reasons catharsis is bad, but you get the idea. Punching your bed will not make you feel better whether or not you hurt yourself doing it. It's misplaced aggression, your subconscious will know it, and you won't feel like you've gotten past the issue. Aggressive behaviour is also just a bad habit to form in general, because it makes you snap at people who don't deserve it.
The reason you get angrier easier, is because you've been reinforcing a bad habit for a long time.
The Western "vent your anger" advice presumes that through aggressive action or fantasy we can achieve emotional release, or catharsis. Experimenters report that sometimes when people retaliate against a provoker, they may indeed calm down. But this tends to be true only if their counterattack is directed against the provoker, if their retaliation seems justifiable, and if their target is not intimidating (Geen & Quanty, 1977; Hokanson & Eldman, 1966). In short, expressing anger can be temporarily calming if it does not leave us feeling guilty or anxious.
It goes on to list more reasons catharsis is bad, but you get the idea. Punching your bed will not make you feel better whether or not you hurt yourself doing it. It's misplaced aggression, your subconscious will know it, and you won't feel like you've gotten past the issue. Aggressive behaviour is also just a bad habit to form in general, because it makes you snap at people who don't deserve it.
First of all, I think you have a wrong opinion of what catharsis meaning. At least the way I see it, catharsis is always a good thing, meaning something like cleansing/purification. And the text you quoted doesn't suggest anything else, imo. It's just that some people think acting out aggression leads to catharsis/ is cathartic, which is usually wrong. And tbh I thought I made it perfectly clear in my previous post that I am aware that acting out like I did is stupid, so I don't know why you're going on about it.
On August 27 2009 05:50 Chef wrote:
The reason you get angrier easier, is because you've been reinforcing a bad habit for a long time.
Wth, how would you know that? You're entirely basing that off an assumption, I never said I have been acting out for a long time, so I don't see how you came to that conclusion. And you're not really giving a solution, all you say is "don't act out and youll stop being angry" which is simply not true, I don't usually act out like that, I'm not one of those people who have 10 broken mice.
Sorry if I sound too defensive /harsh or whatever, I know you're trying to be constructive.
I gave what I thought was a more healthy solution than hitting something to relieve stress. IE: Breathing exercises. They will slow your heart rate down, and allow you to think more clearly, so you'll realise you're being silly BEFORE you go and do something, as you say, 'stupid.'
On August 27 2009 06:45 Chef wrote: I gave what I thought was a more healthy solution than hitting something to relieve stress. IE: Breathing exercises. They will slow your heart rate down, and allow you to think more clearly, so you'll realise you're being silly BEFORE you go and do something, as you say, 'stupid.'
Right you did mention in the post before, sorry. I just didn't get why you went on about acting out being bad when I already agreed it is. I guess my usual way of relieving stress is making music. But in order to do that, I have to move away from my computer first :p
Just the other day I played like 30+ games and still didnt break D+, and my record was something like 120-300 or something absurd, i got so pissed i punched a wall really hard and it was old as hell paint so it cracked and now my knuckles really hurt and i cant play properly. Take this as a lesson kids, stay off of drugs, and stay in school.