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MarineQueen

Forum Index > General Forum
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RHMVNovus
Profile Joined October 2010
United States738 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-01-23 19:12:31
January 23 2011 10:31 GMT
#1
So, while in the Steppes of War game, I encountered Tasteless speaking of how MarineKing's hypothetical girlfriend, the medivac pilot, is getting in the way of other lasses trying to worm their way into his life.

So I just had to do it. A re-construction of the life of MarineQueen that falls off into me giggling my way to as many references as possible. Not intentional, but tends to happen when you have an odd sleep schedule.

Anyway...

+ Show Spoiler [Oh God You Decided to Read This Poor You] +
A stimpack.

That's what it feels like to be with MarineKing. It's such a rush. It's short, it's probably bad for me in the long run, but his personality is such that I can't help but be healed.

Perhaps I should introduce myself. My name is Clare. How I got here was inauspicious. I was just a humble fangirl of the glorious celebrity. Of course, there were the more well-known soldiers that won the hearts of my friends: Yo Hwan, the pugilist, Jonathan, the beastly gentleman, but I set my eyes on a different hero, an environmentalist who only used gas to protect his own men or for medical purposes. I never really thought I had a chance, nor was I really sure I wanted one. As factionalized as the Dominion is, I would end up effecting the death of other Terrans, something I really couldn't live with. And on top of that, I'd heard that the private militias of the other Terran leaders were terribly intolerant, inflicting terrible, terrible harassment on its female members.

Not MarineKing's army. When I was 19 Earth Years of age (arbitrary metric, but who am I to question?), I asked about his militia. I was told that there were nonviolent roles for those unwilling to harm others. That was me; I forced to sign up. Yes, I knew that his camp would be intolerant of women, but I was pursuing my dream: no petty hate can bring me down! So I thought, going in, determination steeled! As I walked in, I saw a large clump of his esteemed marines, all collected together in a sort of ball that I really couldn't walk around, and I expected the worst. But no! Upon seeing me, they all fanned out and dispersed expertly, as if they were accustomed to this! 'Wow,' I rather foolishly thought to myself, 'this might work out!'

That, of course, was before I actually learned that the glorious hero was already taken. A movie star, I heard in the cafeteria. Some tramp named Ellen Page. I rolled my eyes. Well, looks like I signed up for nothing! I was forced to steady myself, and this surrender was quickly replaced by a reminder that I, pilot of the Medical Evacuation Dropship, was responsible for saving lives of marines, lives precious to MarineKing. I may not be able to win his heart through romance, but I could well win his admiration through brilliance.

And so, having spent several weeks learning to pilot the machine, I went out for my first run. I was waiting in the wings, and was going against some Old Guard general, a misguided reactionary called... Nothing? I wasn't sure, I just asked who we were engaging, and I was told that he was NaDa. Well, I suppose I don't need to understand it to know what I needed to do. And what I needed to do was pilot a medivac on this really rather strange Protoss world called Shakuras. I have no idea why this particular location was the ideal location for a human war, but hey, I'm not going to question.

When I was called into action, I was told we were to circumvent the rather static forces of... NaDa... and his so-called tanks. Seriously, these tanks are supposedly the vaunted artillery of MarineKing's enemy, yet they can shoot, what, about a hundred feet? ...right... Anyway, we're forced to fight this scary, scary army (I'm a girl, not a coward), and my task is to prevent NaDa from attacking us by preventing his forces from getting to MarineKing's base. My goal, I'm told, is to take out one of his Command Centers. I'm not unique in this respect, unfortunately; there are three or four other medivacs with us on this very same mission. One of them was Ms. Page. While the bad news is that I can't distinguish myself on this mission, and that the marines are being really ROWDY WITH THE STIM BACK THERE, I suppose by sending Ellen Page, it's not a suicide mission. Yay?

Alright, so I'm going to try to relay this next part to the best of my You should probably know I don't remember much about what follows next, as it seems like it was just ten minutes, but here goes. I dropped off the soldiers assigned to me, and they stimmed to destroy his command center. Objective completed. Afterward, we got an order to destroy his income source, and so the gents below took care of as many of them as they could before NaDa's army came back to us, at which point, we high-tailed it out of there.

Things looked bad, I'm not going to deny that. For a long while afterward, I thought we were absolutely dead. I saw NaDa's army, and it looked like they could kill us all without even breaking a sweat. We were outnumbered. I swore to myself that if I survived this, I would make a move on MarineKing. Fuck impropriety. Not like I'm going to survive anyway. The other medivacs didn't. It was just three of us left against a gigantic army. Worse, one of the other two was Ellen.

So I thought. For some reason, they decommissioned most of their army to get an air fighter. Must be a bitter war if they're killing their own men to kill MarineKing. 'No shit, Clare,' I corrected myself. 'If they're waging war, of course it's bitter.' Yet, despite this, I didn't actually see a Viking, but his army looked damn smaller. This makes no damn sense, but it seems to be working out, since we're rebuilding our own base.

Then MarineKing orders that two of *OUR* medivacs be 'decommissioned.' Oh. Well, that sucks. Guess I don't need to make a move on him. Saves that embarrassment.

Bam. One medivac down, the shards flying onto the ground below. I brace for my two supply to be freed up. 'THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!' I thought. Oh, hell. Those are awful last words. I get to die a tomboy. I'm really actually looking forward to my explosion, now.

Bam. Second medivac... down. It wasn't mine. I looked around, steadying myself against the medivac. Did they misfire? MarineKing's sweetheart just got shot down. I don't remember what happened afterwards... I mean, I survived, and I drove a dropship around to the orders relayed me, but I'll be honest, all that was overshadowed by a numbed confusion that followed me until we returned victorious to the camp.

I, however, was not enjoying the Jinro Soju that the veterans were imbibing. I was far more preoccupied with the transpirings at fourteen supply. I marched to the elevator of his main complex, and went straight to floor 4 - 3? Again, told you, don't remember details from the determined marching, and whether it was the 4th or 3rd floor definitely falls under 'unremembered details.' Anyway, whatever floor it was on, his office was pretty darn conspicuous, behind an ornate but thin, scarcely baneling-proof, wall. As I approached the door, a man boomed out in a frighteningly deep, loud voice: "MarineKingPrime.WE!" Yeah, that knocked me from my stupor, only to have him, seemingly a secretary, say in a much softer voice, "is playing poker with his allies and is unavailable." Uh, yeah, not listening to that, so I push open the doors, and I see a collection of Prime generals sitting around a table.

"ALL-IN!" Cries BitByBit. Everyone else at the table rolls their eyes at this apparently completely expected turn of events. All except MarineKing. No, he continues staring at me.

"Excuse me, gentlemen, but a medivac pilot wishes to speak with me. As you know, marine's can't stim without pilots, so if you would step out... yes, Maka, you can set up a proxy card table outside," MarineKing concedes, and they fall in line as MarineKing and I are left alone. Oh, shit. I kind of need to make a move on him now. I've been in battles, I've barely survived encounters with enemy marines, but it's this prospect that scared me; it was really more frightening to me than the prospect of Clide speaking fluent English. I, consequently, dodge both that issue and my romantic issues for the time being.

"Ellen Page. You and she had a thing. Why did you order her killed?" I asked, seeming, in retrospect, far more aggressive than was necessary, much in the manner of Kyrix.

MarineKing sighed. "Yes, she and I were once as one. But these rumors you received are outdated. See, Ellen Page has recently been getting the idea that she was in a sort of waking dream. Convinced that this actually was a dream, she requested I kill her. So, given that I needed to get rid of a medivac, I was just fulfilling her request. This, of course, is apart from you being the healthiest and most competent medivac pilot we have." Woo. Win his admiration through competence: Objective complete. On to phase two.

"Are you certain that my grand experience of two weeks is the only reason you allowed me to survive?" I asked, pushing the issue instead of getting myself more ahead.

"Do you think I believe that you actually joined because of some belief in the righteousness of my cause? There are at least fourteen premier, S-Class generals. The Terrans have an unstoppable hegemony and the Zerg can't hold a candle to us, yet in-fighting is all we're capable of. For anyone to have an unbridled faith in human integrity in this time would be... unrealistic. No. I'm quite certain you joined my group for the same reason I saved you," MarineKing concluded. My, was he a FoxY gentleman. His words as smooth as his hands. Into his bedroom we went. Oh sure, the doors weren't soundproof, but I don't think it mat[CENSORED BY THE GOMTV STAFF]

And that's why, in the deep recesses of his luxurious bed, I call him Optimus.

And thus is the abbreviated tale of MarineQueen.

EDIT: Thread's been moved, addendum at the top remotum est.
Droning his sorrows in massive amounts of macro
hugman
Profile Joined June 2009
Sweden4644 Posts
January 23 2011 10:34 GMT
#2
What the fuck did I just read
kr_priest
Profile Joined September 2010
Korea (South)223 Posts
January 23 2011 10:36 GMT
#3
Read it all. Brilliant!
Superiorwolf
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
United States5509 Posts
January 23 2011 10:37 GMT
#4
Ahahahaha funny I liked it! Thanks ^^ Gonna go sleep now MAKE MORE WHEN I WAKE UP!!
Check out my stream at www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=315053 and follow me on Twitter @EGSuppy! :)
Daria
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Australia500 Posts
January 23 2011 10:37 GMT
#5
that's pretty cool...... nice :o
daria[e]
FinestHour
Profile Joined August 2010
United States18466 Posts
January 23 2011 10:39 GMT
#6
So this is what one man does during while watching GSL
thug life.                                                       MVP/ex-
Bswhunter
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Australia954 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-01-23 10:47:27
January 23 2011 10:43 GMT
#7
Awesome inception refrence.

Oh and I would like more GSL games turned fan-fict. People trying to justify the things that occur in SC2 games are always pretty amusing.
Stop browsing and do whatever it is you're supposed to do. TL will still be here when you get back
Kraznaya
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States3711 Posts
January 23 2011 10:49 GMT
#8
brilliant brilliant usage of multiple references
do you have enough resolve, hero of justice?
Nolot
Profile Joined December 2010
United Kingdom271 Posts
January 23 2011 10:56 GMT
#9
Very nice read
gerundium
Profile Joined June 2010
Netherlands786 Posts
January 23 2011 10:57 GMT
#10
that was really funny.
Ausfailia
Profile Joined December 2010
Australia123 Posts
January 23 2011 10:57 GMT
#11
Possibly the best thing ever to have graced my eyes.
Obelisk7
Profile Joined January 2010
Korea (South)65 Posts
January 23 2011 11:01 GMT
#12
wow....wtf?

So like...who's after Clare? XD

She's bound to pilot once again, but I don't see her surviving every time.
Take Nothing For Granted, For Everything Changes.
Godstorm
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Romania845 Posts
January 23 2011 11:05 GMT
#13
Lol the maka proxy and bitbybit all-in that made me lol. Awesome story, very well writen and maybe there will be a follow up ?
"It's not that he's dumb, he's just neural parasited by a retarded infestor"-Day 9
aScle
Profile Joined September 2010
Australia375 Posts
January 23 2011 11:05 GMT
#14
Brilliant, laughed at the Gomtv reference.
Artosis: "Why did the collosus fall over? BECAUSE IT WAS IMBALANCED!!!"
Archerylady
Profile Joined January 2011
277 Posts
January 23 2011 11:09 GMT
#15
Brilliant. Very well written, especially the references.
+ Show Spoiler [GSL!! spoiler] +
It made my night after the unfortunate events of the GSL, and I will definitely cheer for MKP in the finals!
Space_C0wb0y
Profile Joined March 2009
Germany41 Posts
January 23 2011 11:10 GMT
#16
On January 23 2011 19:34 hugman wrote:
What the fuck did I just read

You've read it, now you cannot unread it.
MrCon
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
France29748 Posts
January 23 2011 11:11 GMT
#17
That was brilliant xD
SoMuchBetter
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Australia10606 Posts
January 23 2011 11:15 GMT
#18
that was much better than I was expecting. good job!
AUSSIESCUM
TeamLiquid eSTROgeneral #1 • RIP
MassHysteria
Profile Joined October 2010
United States3678 Posts
January 23 2011 11:21 GMT
#19
I am speechless.

Good writing though.
"Just ban all the J's...even jinklejoes" --unnamed source
Asha
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United Kingdom38256 Posts
January 23 2011 11:25 GMT
#20
That was amazing ^___^

and also...what did I just read o__O
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