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Top Quotes by TL.net - Page 7

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Chibi[OWNS]
Profile Joined May 2003
United Kingdom10597 Posts
February 24 2006 10:15 GMT
#121
--- Nuked ---
Carnac
Profile Blog Joined December 2003
Germany / USA16648 Posts
February 24 2006 10:23 GMT
#122
On January 03 2006 18:53 mitsy wrote:
who the fuck cares what you saw or never saw? i've never seen you take a dump. should i conclude that you are full of shit?


On January 01 2006 12:01 Chris307 wrote:
Oh I have a horrible story about American Pie.

When I was like 12 or 13 I was in this habit of always using my dirty socks from the hamper to clean up after "freaking the pole," which would leave the socks very stiff after they dry. Anyway, my sister and mother, who were still doing my laundry for me, would ask me why my socks get "crispy" and they'd be so confused, and then one day they were having a conversation and my sister's like "Why do guys' socks get crispy?!" (I wasn't the only one apparently, her older disgusting boyfriend must have also done this) and my mom just laughed and was like I don't know, maybe they have different feet, and I was just like uhh I dunno who knows, mysteries of the universe

So we're sitting in front of TV one day, and I'm flicking through the HBO channels and I turn on American Pie because I'd never seen it before and it looked hilarious in previews, and all is going good and well until the movie actually starts. Everybody was like "hey this is on I wanted to see this" so I'm like cool, then it goes through the whole opening scene where Jason Biggs' parents walk in on him and he's jerking off into a sock.
ModeratorHi! I'm a .signature *virus*! Copy me into your ~/.signature to help me spread!
tKd_
Profile Joined February 2005
United States2916 Posts
February 24 2006 11:53 GMT
#123
On February 24 2006 16:09 sith wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 24 2006 05:11 Patriot.dlk wrote:
THIS IS THE ALL TIME FUNNIEST THING, HOT_BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID

Hot_Bid:

i have a poem, it borrows a little from the rapper ludacris:

scv starts to build
another one can't until
the first one decides to go
mmy annoyance starts to grow
i can't build there!
you can't build there!


move bitch
get out the way
get out the way bitch
get out the way


i wanna place my rax bitch
get out the way
get out the way bitch
get out the way


move bitch
get out the way
get out the way bitch
get out the way


my fac needs a shop bitch
get out the way
get out the way bitch
get out the way


move bitch
get out the way
get out the way bitch
get out the way


I DON'T CARE THAT I DOUBLE POSTED THAT IS THE FUNNIEST THING IN EXISTENCE (EXCEPT FOR THIS) Here


WOW that link has got to be the funniest thing I've seen in months. thx lol
BG1
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
Canada1550 Posts
Last Edited: 2006-02-24 12:47:45
February 24 2006 12:47 GMT
#124
That thread where a guy posts about his wife or girlfiend getting raped and some guy replies -
"Which map ?"
There was once a dream that was Esports. You could only whisper it. Anything more than a whisper and it would vanish... Now is the time to make that dream a reality!
Meta
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
United States6225 Posts
February 24 2006 13:30 GMT
#125
On February 24 2006 19:23 Carnac wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 03 2006 18:53 mitsy wrote:
who the fuck cares what you saw or never saw? i've never seen you take a dump. should i conclude that you are full of shit?



ahahahahahahaha that's golden
good vibes only
Hot_Bid
Profile Blog Joined October 2003
Braavos36390 Posts
February 24 2006 13:48 GMT
#126
On February 24 2006 21:47 BG1 wrote:
That thread where a guy posts about his wife or girlfiend getting raped and some guy replies -
"Which map ?"

i added that already
@Hot_Bid on Twitter - ESPORTS life since 2010 - http://i.imgur.com/U2psw.png
iloveoo
Profile Joined April 2003
634 Posts
February 25 2006 00:25 GMT
#127
When i think about top quotes in TL, i somehow always remember this one:

adobo god on the rekrul vs elky liquibition:

"ahhh, the 7-0 incident was an embarrasment for the american gamer, rekrul. as elky beat him over and over again like a man with a stick beating and lashing on a dog!! the dog ran home beaten beacause of the beatings..."

Blew: "that's quite possibly the worst writing i have ever seen.."

"to mr. bleww

i am so sorry today my friend, for i am not myself today. you see, the human mind is very very complex, sometimes you feel as if you are a dog being beaten by a burly man with a stick, beating and lashing at you with a big stick! then you have no choice now but to run in your dog house and hide, then as you watch outside, you see the two feet of the burly man..... "

it really is too bad that he was banned... he will be missed!
Unaborted babies shoot up their school, molest children, and make shitty music.
Night[Mare
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
Mexico4793 Posts
February 25 2006 00:31 GMT
#128
On February 24 2006 22:30 Meta wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 24 2006 19:23 Carnac wrote:
On January 03 2006 18:53 mitsy wrote:
who the fuck cares what you saw or never saw? i've never seen you take a dump. should i conclude that you are full of shit?



ahahahahahahaha that's golden


boo i dont get this
Teamliquidian townie
8882
Profile Blog Joined December 2003
2720 Posts
February 25 2006 00:39 GMT
#129
On February 24 2006 05:56 joinker wrote:

Lx said , my password is "1",and that's too easy to guess.
I have returned
OneOther
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States10774 Posts
February 25 2006 01:42 GMT
#130
Rofl, this made my day wow.
sith
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United States2474 Posts
February 25 2006 01:50 GMT
#131
On February 25 2006 09:25 iloveoo wrote:
When i think about top quotes in TL, i somehow always remember this one:

adobo god on the rekrul vs elky liquibition:

"ahhh, the 7-0 incident was an embarrasment for the american gamer, rekrul. as elky beat him over and over again like a man with a stick beating and lashing on a dog!! the dog ran home beaten beacause of the beatings..."

Blew: "that's quite possibly the worst writing i have ever seen.."

"to mr. bleww

i am so sorry today my friend, for i am not myself today. you see, the human mind is very very complex, sometimes you feel as if you are a dog being beaten by a burly man with a stick, beating and lashing at you with a big stick! then you have no choice now but to run in your dog house and hide, then as you watch outside, you see the two feet of the burly man..... "

it really is too bad that he was banned... he will be missed!


Rofl that was pretty good
mensrea
Profile Joined September 2002
Canada5062 Posts
February 25 2006 02:14 GMT
#132
That quote on marriable women by Moltke was one of the funniest posts I've read on this site - but only once I realized he was being quite serious.
actus non facit reum, nisi mens sit rea.
ubergamer15
Profile Joined January 2005
United States645 Posts
Last Edited: 2006-02-25 02:28:58
February 25 2006 02:23 GMT
#133
Someone find Mani's battle report; the one that started off "The greatest Starcraft player in history..."

EDIT: Aha! Found it:
On January 15, 2005, Manifesto7 wrote:

Game 3: Reach (p) 59-48 vs SaferZerg (z) 16-11 on Neo Guillotine

I have heard rumblings about my reporting being somewhat biased towards Reach, and that I should try to be more impartial. I apologize for this, and will try to curb my enthusiasm for him from now on.

The greatest StarCraft player on the earth today (23-28 vs Z) warped in at five, while SaferZerg (4-3 vs P) spawned across the map at eleven. Safer went for a safe twelve pool build while scouting the map, while Odin himself used his brilliant intellect and cunning to start with a forge-first build which quickly led to a fast nexus. It looked as if the game would boil down to a race between Reach’s sairs and Safer’s mutalisks, but in reality there was no competition. Saferzerg was forced to switch to lurkers while the Gifted One’s air power dominated the skies.

While Safer looked to contain with his new lurkers, Reach simply shrugged off his opponents mild attempts at resistance as his dt artfully ninja sliced the drones at Safer’s expansion. Bordering on contempt for this pathetic display of zerg offense, Reach broke out of his main with a zeal/goon/temp army, decimating his opponent’s lurkers and expanding two more times. With only one expansion, Safer was unable to keep up with the protoss macro game, and with every breath Reach gave life to new legions of armies willing to do his bidding. As Safer huddled in the corner of the map, mounting no offense and trying to avoid detection, Reach launched his Spartans relentlessly, raining blue fire down upon the confused and frightened zerg. With the blood running in torrents, Safer quickly taped out in the face of the onslaught, took one look at the face of God, and ran from the MegaWeb studio to find solace in the company of lesser mortals.

Reach simply got up, made all the girls swoon with a single smile, and then got into his cloud car and headed back to the heavens for fine wine and peeled grapes.

Reach > SaferZerg

Unfortunately, this does not change things for my Mudang hero. However, he will ultimately extract revenge upon all those who attempt to sully his name.

lolololol
An optimist sees the glass half-full. A pessimist sees the glass half-empty. An engineer sees a waste of half a glass.
IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32278 Posts
February 25 2006 02:31 GMT
#134
HAaha nice report :D
Moderator<:3-/-<
cuteFayth
Profile Joined January 2006
Canada1167 Posts
Last Edited: 2006-02-25 04:30:12
February 25 2006 04:25 GMT
#135
guys the pokemon video is AWESOME LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

this one also rocks http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1976314898516214440&q=pokemon kid
decafchicken
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States20155 Posts
February 25 2006 04:46 GMT
#136
On February 25 2006 11:23 ubergamer15 wrote:
Someone find Mani's battle report; the one that started off "The greatest Starcraft player in history..."

EDIT: Aha! Found it:
Show nested quote +
On January 15, 2005, Manifesto7 wrote:

Game 3: Reach (p) 59-48 vs SaferZerg (z) 16-11 on Neo Guillotine

I have heard rumblings about my reporting being somewhat biased towards Reach, and that I should try to be more impartial. I apologize for this, and will try to curb my enthusiasm for him from now on.

The greatest StarCraft player on the earth today (23-28 vs Z) warped in at five, while SaferZerg (4-3 vs P) spawned across the map at eleven. Safer went for a safe twelve pool build while scouting the map, while Odin himself used his brilliant intellect and cunning to start with a forge-first build which quickly led to a fast nexus. It looked as if the game would boil down to a race between Reach’s sairs and Safer’s mutalisks, but in reality there was no competition. Saferzerg was forced to switch to lurkers while the Gifted One’s air power dominated the skies.

While Safer looked to contain with his new lurkers, Reach simply shrugged off his opponents mild attempts at resistance as his dt artfully ninja sliced the drones at Safer’s expansion. Bordering on contempt for this pathetic display of zerg offense, Reach broke out of his main with a zeal/goon/temp army, decimating his opponent’s lurkers and expanding two more times. With only one expansion, Safer was unable to keep up with the protoss macro game, and with every breath Reach gave life to new legions of armies willing to do his bidding. As Safer huddled in the corner of the map, mounting no offense and trying to avoid detection, Reach launched his Spartans relentlessly, raining blue fire down upon the confused and frightened zerg. With the blood running in torrents, Safer quickly taped out in the face of the onslaught, took one look at the face of God, and ran from the MegaWeb studio to find solace in the company of lesser mortals.

Reach simply got up, made all the girls swoon with a single smile, and then got into his cloud car and headed back to the heavens for fine wine and peeled grapes.

Reach > SaferZerg

Unfortunately, this does not change things for my Mudang hero. However, he will ultimately extract revenge upon all those who attempt to sully his name.

lolololol


Oh. My. Gawd. Calling this art or golden would be insulting it. It needs new word to fully express my feelings over it.
how reasonable is it to eat off wood instead of your tummy?
EvilTeletubby
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Baltimore, USA22259 Posts
February 25 2006 05:04 GMT
#137
On February 25 2006 11:14 mensrea wrote:
That quote on marriable women by Moltke was one of the funniest posts I've read on this site - but only once I realized he was being quite serious.


Kekeke:

On October 20 2005 10:39 Konni wrote:
Draw MoltkeWarding looking at a girl and finding her attractive


On October 20 2005 11:22 SoMuchBetter wrote:
I wanted to give that one a shot
[image loading]
Moderatorhttp://carbonleaf.yuku.com/topic/408/t/So-I-proposed-at-a-Carbon-Leaf-concert.html ***** RIP Geoff
mensrea
Profile Joined September 2002
Canada5062 Posts
February 25 2006 05:15 GMT
#138
rofl

Please. Let us stop. We are being too cruel.
actus non facit reum, nisi mens sit rea.
Mynock
Profile Joined September 2002
4492 Posts
February 25 2006 05:55 GMT
#139
On February 25 2006 11:14 mensrea wrote:
That quote on marriable women by Moltke was one of the funniest posts I've read on this site - but only once I realized he was being quite serious.


While I'm still having a hard time accepting it as him being serious -_-. I'm sometimes inclined to think that at least some of his posts are cleverly disguised schemes to pull our cumulative legs while he's having a laugh at our expenses.

-Mynock
EvilTeletubby
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Baltimore, USA22259 Posts
Last Edited: 2006-02-25 07:43:12
February 25 2006 07:42 GMT
#140
On October 09 2004 18:36. 16:15 ahk-gosu wrote:
after watching a huge amount of vods/replays even though im still waiting for my dream siva vs sync vod
i realized that progamers arent really THAT good except a few select people

seriously im not trying to be cocky but i can beat some of these pro gamers.


http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=18765
Moderatorhttp://carbonleaf.yuku.com/topic/408/t/So-I-proposed-at-a-Carbon-Leaf-concert.html ***** RIP Geoff
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