• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EST 03:19
CET 09:19
KST 17:19
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
RSL Revival - 2025 Season Finals Preview8RSL Season 3 - Playoffs Preview0RSL Season 3 - RO16 Groups C & D Preview0RSL Season 3 - RO16 Groups A & B Preview2TL.net Map Contest #21: Winners12
Community News
ComeBackTV's documentary on Byun's Career !9Weekly Cups (Dec 8-14): MaxPax, Clem, Cure win4Weekly Cups (Dec 1-7): Clem doubles, Solar gets over the hump1Weekly Cups (Nov 24-30): MaxPax, Clem, herO win2BGE Stara Zagora 2026 announced15
StarCraft 2
General
Micro Lags When Playing SC2? ComeBackTV's documentary on Byun's Career ! When will we find out if there are more tournament Weekly Cups (Dec 8-14): MaxPax, Clem, Cure win RSL Revival - 2025 Season Finals Preview
Tourneys
$100 Prize Pool - Winter Warp Gate Masters Showdow $5,000+ WardiTV 2025 Championship Winter Warp Gate Amateur Showdown #1 Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament RSL Offline Finals Info - Dec 13 and 14!
Strategy
Custom Maps
Map Editor closed ?
External Content
Mutation # 504 Retribution Mutation # 503 Fowl Play Mutation # 502 Negative Reinforcement Mutation # 501 Price of Progress
Brood War
General
Klaucher discontinued / in-game color settings Anyone remember me from 2000s Bnet EAST server? BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ How Rain Became ProGamer in Just 3 Months FlaSh on: Biggest Problem With SnOw's Playstyle
Tourneys
[BSL21] LB QuarterFinals - Sunday 21:00 CET Small VOD Thread 2.0 [Megathread] Daily Proleagues [BSL21] WB SEMIFINALS - Saturday 21:00 CET
Strategy
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Game Theory for Starcraft Current Meta Fighting Spirit mining rates
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread General RTS Discussion Thread Nintendo Switch Thread Mechabellum PC Games Sales Thread
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Mafia Game Mode Feedback/Ideas Survivor II: The Amazon Sengoku Mafia TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
The Games Industry And ATVI Russo-Ukrainian War Thread US Politics Mega-thread Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine YouTube Thread
Fan Clubs
White-Ra Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
Anime Discussion Thread [Manga] One Piece Movie Discussion!
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
TL+ Announced Where to ask questions and add stream?
Blogs
The (Hidden) Drug Problem in…
TrAiDoS
I decided to write a webnov…
DjKniteX
James Bond movies ranking - pa…
Topin
Thanks for the RSL
Hildegard
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 1615 users

Have you ever been caught jacking off? - Page 16

Forum Index > General Forum
Post a Reply
Prev 1 14 15 16 17 18 30 Next All
riotjune
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States3394 Posts
July 24 2008 01:53 GMT
#301
No, but I caught a friend in the act once. He had a guilty look on his face.
Iankill
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
Canada109 Posts
July 25 2008 20:19 GMT
#302
I never got caught but a friend of mine did. It happen me and a few other of my friends were out around 1 am and we were bored to we decided to pull on prank on a random house. So we were like "hey matt go jerk off on that guys doornob" So he goes gets about half way through while were hiding in the bushes avoiding looking at him then out of nowhere a car comes down the road and pulls in the driveway its the people that live there. They scream "what are you doing here" My friend goes nothing and trys to run away but his pants fall down and they catch up to him and ask him to come inside or they'll call the cops. We ran away at this point apparantly they thought he was trying to break in. Would've been one hell of a awkward conversation when he told them what he was doing there.
ViRii
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States826 Posts
July 25 2008 20:39 GMT
#303
I think this thread proves that 22 people on TL.net are blatant liars.
Kingsp4de20
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
United States716 Posts
July 25 2008 23:01 GMT
#304
O shit I think I totally repressed this memory or somthing.
I think got the majority of you beat though.
I think I was about 11 or 12 at the time and I was bored at my house home alone.
For some reason I got the brilliant idea to stick my dick in the vaccuum.
Anyways at some point my dad came home and walked in my room and witnessed me getting my first "blow job" lol...Very akward moment. He asked me if I was having fun then walked out of my room and shut my door.
_Grazze_
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
834 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-07-25 23:27:15
July 25 2008 23:26 GMT
#305
Haha, I get a funny picture of your dad walking into your room.

"Hi! Are you having fun today son?"

"Howdy ho, Yes Pa!"

+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]

Funchucks
Profile Joined June 2007
Canada2113 Posts
July 25 2008 23:28 GMT
#306
On July 26 2008 08:01 Kingsp4de20 wrote:
O shit I think I totally repressed this memory or somthing.
I think got the majority of you beat though.
I think I was about 11 or 12 at the time and I was bored at my house home alone.
For some reason I got the brilliant idea to stick my dick in the vaccuum.
Anyways at some point my dad came home and walked in my room and witnessed me getting my first "blow job" lol...Very akward moment. He asked me if I was having fun then walked out of my room and shut my door.

http://www.darwinawards.com/stupid/stupid2000-05.html
A 51-year-old man decided to satisfy his fantasy of robotic love by seeking sexual gratification with his vacuum cleaner. Most men would think twice before poking a valuable organ into a vacuum, but this optimistic fellow had no qualms about the safety of his intended course of action. And using a vacuum cleaner had the appealing aspect of tidying up his mess after satisfying him.
Our horny hero didn't realize that the suction on his hand-held Singer A-6 was created by a blade whirling just beneath the hose attachment, adjacent to the collection bag. His search for pleasure was cut short seconds after he stuck his penis into the vacuum and the blade lopped off part of his penis. With a sense of loss, he staggered to the phone and called police. He told them that he had been stabbed in his sleep. When police pointed out suspicious evidence, the victim claimed not to remember the incident.

Surgeons at Monmouth Medical Center stopped the bleeding, but were unable to reattach the 1/2" severed part.
I serve my houseguests slices of butter.
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
July 25 2008 23:31 GMT
#307
On July 26 2008 08:28 Funchucks wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 26 2008 08:01 Kingsp4de20 wrote:
O shit I think I totally repressed this memory or somthing.
I think got the majority of you beat though.
I think I was about 11 or 12 at the time and I was bored at my house home alone.
For some reason I got the brilliant idea to stick my dick in the vaccuum.
Anyways at some point my dad came home and walked in my room and witnessed me getting my first "blow job" lol...Very akward moment. He asked me if I was having fun then walked out of my room and shut my door.

http://www.darwinawards.com/stupid/stupid2000-05.html
Show nested quote +
A 51-year-old man decided to satisfy his fantasy of robotic love by seeking sexual gratification with his vacuum cleaner. Most men would think twice before poking a valuable organ into a vacuum, but this optimistic fellow had no qualms about the safety of his intended course of action. And using a vacuum cleaner had the appealing aspect of tidying up his mess after satisfying him.
Our horny hero didn't realize that the suction on his hand-held Singer A-6 was created by a blade whirling just beneath the hose attachment, adjacent to the collection bag. His search for pleasure was cut short seconds after he stuck his penis into the vacuum and the blade lopped off part of his penis. With a sense of loss, he staggered to the phone and called police. He told them that he had been stabbed in his sleep. When police pointed out suspicious evidence, the victim claimed not to remember the incident.

Surgeons at Monmouth Medical Center stopped the bleeding, but were unable to reattach the 1/2" severed part.


I do'nt know if i'm suppose to laugh to that...
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
Kennelie
Profile Joined December 2007
United States2296 Posts
July 25 2008 23:47 GMT
#308
YANG MY LOVED ONE!!! Yes yang I have been caught about 3-4 times.....Once by my mother and the other times by my step dad......Pretty awkward situations.....
ya had ya shot kid!
HeadBangaa
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
United States6512 Posts
July 25 2008 23:52 GMT
#309
On July 26 2008 08:01 Kingsp4de20 wrote:
O shit I think I totally repressed this memory or somthing.
I think got the majority of you beat though.
I think I was about 11 or 12 at the time and I was bored at my house home alone.
For some reason I got the brilliant idea to stick my dick in the vaccuum.
Anyways at some point my dad came home and walked in my room and witnessed me getting my first "blow job" lol...Very akward moment. He asked me if I was having fun then walked out of my room and shut my door.

Mmm, yes I remember make sweet love to the vacuum cleaner @ 12. After a growth spurt, I had to switch to a shop vac.
People who fail to distinguish Socratic Method from malicious trolling are sadly stupid and not worth a response.
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
July 26 2008 00:21 GMT
#310
On July 26 2008 08:47 Kennelie wrote:
YANG MY LOVED ONE!!! Yes yang I have been caught about 3-4 times.....Once by my mother and the other times by my step dad......Pretty awkward situations.....



HI KENN!! <3 <3
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
Kingsp4de20
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
United States716 Posts
July 26 2008 04:12 GMT
#311
On July 26 2008 08:52 HeadBangaa wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 26 2008 08:01 Kingsp4de20 wrote:
O shit I think I totally repressed this memory or somthing.
I think got the majority of you beat though.
I think I was about 11 or 12 at the time and I was bored at my house home alone.
For some reason I got the brilliant idea to stick my dick in the vaccuum.
Anyways at some point my dad came home and walked in my room and witnessed me getting my first "blow job" lol...Very akward moment. He asked me if I was having fun then walked out of my room and shut my door.

Mmm, yes I remember make sweet love to the vacuum cleaner @ 12. After a growth spurt, I had to switch to a shop vac.


rofl
Archaic
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States4024 Posts
July 26 2008 04:32 GMT
#312
I don't think you should laugh at that. It is a bit painful...
Superiorwolf
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
United States5509 Posts
July 26 2008 05:38 GMT
#313
Getting caught masturbating / resentment of black people / holding in your own piss / itchy balls / getting caught having sex / etc... Gladstone, I have a feeling you're starting a new trend here o.o
Check out my stream at www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=315053 and follow me on Twitter @EGSuppy! :)
lxginverse
Profile Joined May 2008
Monaco1506 Posts
July 26 2008 06:55 GMT
#314
ROFL @ this thread


well,back when i was 16 i got caught once in our school infirmary by my female classmates and they were like "need assistance?" i was never able to look them in The Eye again since that day
fromis_9 enjoyer
boesthius
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
United States11637 Posts
July 26 2008 06:59 GMT
#315
--- Nuked ---
Salv
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Canada3083 Posts
July 26 2008 07:01 GMT
#316
On July 26 2008 15:55 lxginverse wrote:
ROFL @ this thread


well,back when i was 16 i got caught once in our school infirmary by my female classmates and they were like "need assistance?" i was never able to look them in The Eye again since that day


Should have played it smooth and got a blowjob.
powa
Profile Joined July 2008
United States58 Posts
July 26 2008 07:06 GMT
#317
On July 26 2008 15:55 lxginverse wrote:
ROFL @ this thread


well,back when i was 16 i got caught once in our school infirmary by my female classmates and they were like "need assistance?" i was never able to look them in The Eye again since that day


hahahaha i guess patience isn't a virtue.
Hypnosis
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States2061 Posts
July 26 2008 07:52 GMT
#318
On July 26 2008 15:55 lxginverse wrote:
ROFL @ this thread


well,back when i was 16 i got caught once in our school infirmary by my female classmates and they were like "need assistance?" i was never able to look them in The Eye again since that day


The Eye.

thats some deep smack your jackin man.. slow deep smack.
Science without religion is lame, Religion without science is blind
Astrogation
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States477 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-08-09 09:26:37
August 09 2008 09:26 GMT
#319
Sigh.. I feel so disgraceful... Before, I voted no but I was caught in the act by my mom yesterday and Ohh I feel shitty
ulszz
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
Jamaica1787 Posts
August 09 2008 09:30 GMT
#320
On August 09 2008 18:26 KimTaeYeon wrote:
Sigh.. I feel so disgraceful... Before, I voted no but I was caught in the act by my mom yesterday and Ohh I feel shitty

was it embarrassing as what as shit or what? or did she get mad? i can't imagine anyone getting mad at someone for jacking off.
everliving, everfaithful, eversure
Prev 1 14 15 16 17 18 30 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 1h 41m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
WinterStarcraft721
StarCraft: Brood War
actioN 731
Shuttle 530
Stork 457
Leta 290
Sharp 252
Soma 158
Dewaltoss 80
Mong 67
JulyZerg 25
yabsab 22
[ Show more ]
Movie 21
Britney 0
Dota 2
XcaliburYe213
NeuroSwarm75
League of Legends
JimRising 556
Counter-Strike
oskar24
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor161
Other Games
summit1g9906
Mew2King87
Models4
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick736
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 11 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Berry_CruncH311
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
Upcoming Events
Sparkling Tuna Cup
1h 41m
Ladder Legends
8h 41m
BSL 21
11h 41m
StRyKeR vs TBD
Bonyth vs TBD
Replay Cast
1d
Wardi Open
1d 3h
Monday Night Weeklies
1d 8h
WardiTV Invitational
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
WardiTV Invitational
4 days
ByuN vs Solar
Clem vs Classic
Cure vs herO
Reynor vs MaxPax
Replay Cast
5 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Acropolis #4 - TS3
RSL Offline Finals
Kuram Kup

Ongoing

C-Race Season 1
IPSL Winter 2025-26
KCM Race Survival 2025 Season 4
YSL S2
BSL Season 21
Slon Tour Season 2
CSL Season 19: Qualifier 1
WardiTV 2025
META Madness #9
eXTREMESLAND 2025
SL Budapest Major 2025
ESL Impact League Season 8
BLAST Rivals Fall 2025
IEM Chengdu 2025
PGL Masters Bucharest 2025
Thunderpick World Champ.
CS Asia Championships 2025
ESL Pro League S22

Upcoming

CSL Season 19: Qualifier 2
CSL 2025 WINTER (S19)
BSL 21 Non-Korean Championship
Acropolis #4
IPSL Spring 2026
Bellum Gens Elite Stara Zagora 2026
HSC XXVIII
Big Gabe Cup #3
OSC Championship Season 13
Nations Cup 2026
ESL Pro League Season 23
PGL Cluj-Napoca 2026
IEM Kraków 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter Qual
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2025 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.