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Why are you afraid to die? - Page 9

Forum Index > General Forum
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TS-Rupbar
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
Sweden1089 Posts
January 13 2007 21:08 GMT
#161
I don't want my friends to be sad
decafchicken
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States20009 Posts
January 13 2007 23:26 GMT
#162
On January 14 2007 06:08 TS-Rupbar wrote:
I don't want my friends to be sad


if nobody would be sad that i died, i would've killed myself by now

disturbing concept now that i've thought of it
how reasonable is it to eat off wood instead of your tummy?
Chibi[OWNS]
Profile Joined May 2003
United Kingdom10597 Posts
January 13 2007 23:28 GMT
#163
--- Nuked ---
teh leet newb
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States1999 Posts
January 14 2007 00:25 GMT
#164
I'm not afraid. Death will be like a new adventure. Or it'll be just like sleeping a long time. I like sleep.
"The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter." - Winston Churchill
Mora
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada5235 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-01-14 02:44:53
January 14 2007 02:43 GMT
#165
On January 14 2007 04:34 MTF wrote:
I don't refute that it's a useless fear. I only restate that fear itself isn't controllable. It can be handled and it can be fought against, but no matter what, if you fear something then the fear will remain there, even if not constantly.

I've been struggling with the issue since I was five. XP Obviously that isn't normal, but fear is fear. While it may be a more "valid" fear at an older age, it isn't a prerequisite. I don't let it control my life, but that doesn't mean I can stop being afraid of it.


Agreed. Someone who doesn't fear death cannot possibly understand how un-ignorable that fear is to someone who does.

My best advice would be to try to somehow come to a place that death is no longer scary. At first i found solace in believing in an after-life, then i found solace in the beauty of life instigated by the relationship between life and death.

Ultimately, you need to find something to believe in. Not something you need to convince yourself, but something you can't help but believe. Very much like faith (or i guess it would be faith).

When i come across a challenge or fear, i for the most part continuously pursue it until i conquer it or am no longer afraid of not conquering it. Some people perfer to avoid things that disturb them - i have a resounding optimism that makes me believe that anything can be conquered - so i pursue it.

So i guess my advice would be to do just that. So far, it's never done me wrong. Avoiding fear never really lets you get away from it, especially of something like death. It's always in the back of your mind, tarnishing even the most joyful of moments - because ultimately you know that they don't matter because you are going to die. This is something that must be defeated. Not only will those moments no longer be tarnished, but they will be influenced just as much by your comfort, and will be more joyful and full than ever before.
Happiness only real when shared.
EmS.Radagast
Profile Joined November 2004
Israel280 Posts
January 14 2007 04:07 GMT
#166

To continue with this topic, but with another question:

If you could chose to know what happens when you die, would you chose to know, or would you chose to carry on with yoru life, not knowing what happens when you die?

Explain your choice aswell


I believe I will cease to exist when I die.

There are fates much worse than that (hell is just one possibility among many), and I'd rather not hear about them. I'm somewhat of a pessimist, so I'd rather not be told and just keep my beliefs - I already got used to the idea that I will no longer exist.

Like someone else said in an earlier post, I don't think my life will have made any real difference, and I'm somewhat troubled by it, but I'm in the process of getting over that, too.
Being [almost] certain of my inevitable death does not motivate me in any way. Other people here mentioned it makes them seek out happiness and a wholesome life experience etc.
But that's completely pointless, you see, because when you die, nobody will care that you had a great life. That life experience will vanish and in all likelihood, whatever effects you had on the world will be absorbed into the "noise" of reality like a droplet diffusing into the middle of a vast ocean.
For me, it's enough to live comfortably and try to do something useful some of the time. But I admit motivation is a good thing, I don't mean to spoil it :D. sorry if what I say comes across as depressing.

I know its not THREE-DEE!!
pr0n
Profile Joined September 2005
United States277 Posts
January 14 2007 04:32 GMT
#167
I'm not.
pr0n
Profile Joined September 2005
United States277 Posts
January 14 2007 04:33 GMT
#168
On January 14 2007 08:26 decafchicken wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 14 2007 06:08 TS-Rupbar wrote:
I don't want my friends to be sad


if nobody would be sad that i died, i would've killed myself by now

disturbing concept now that i've thought of it


True. If my mom weren't around, I'd be dead by now.
Mora
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada5235 Posts
January 14 2007 04:43 GMT
#169
On January 14 2007 13:07 EmS.Radagast wrote:
Other people here mentioned it makes them seek out happiness and a wholesome life experience etc.
But that's completely pointless, you see, because when you die, nobody will care that you had a great life. That life experience will vanish and in all likelihood, whatever effects you had on the world will be absorbed into the "noise" of reality like a droplet diffusing into the middle of a vast ocean.


Why does it matter that nobody will care that i lived a great life? If i was the only being in existence, should i commit suicide simply because no one would be around to see it?

Any effects i have on the world will be asorbed into the eternity of the universe - true. Shouldn't i be thankful for that? Seriously, i have enough trouble with my life as it is - knowing that my life would most certaintly effect the rest of eternity would be much more pressure than i can handle. My life is absolutely pointless and will not matter to the universe and i'm thankful.

I am a droplet that will one day diffuse into the vast oceans of time and creation - this is true. And as all ready mentioned, im thankful for it. By why not be a brilliant little droplet? Why not be oblivious to everything that doesn't matter, and sparkle and shine and grow and dance and smile and cry and just be fantastical before absorbed into that inevitable oblivion? The inevtiable oblivion can't and won't intimidate me - i will be fantastical!

I realize i may be flogging the dead horse much; but i can't help it. I realize my optimism and passion for life must make others puke. Bummer. I can't help but be inspired by the truths of life, and i can't help but want to share that inspiration.

For me, it's enough to live comfortably and try to do something useful some of the time. But I admit motivation is a good thing, I don't mean to spoil it :D. sorry if what I say comes across as depressing.


Don't you see? If death can't spoil my motivation, you certainly can't. You don't depress me by not sharing my optimism, you make me all the more motivated to inspire you and those like you!
Happiness only real when shared.
NotSorry
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
United States6722 Posts
January 14 2007 04:48 GMT
#170
Biggest fear of death comes from being unable to provide for and protect my daughter.
We have now sunk to a depth at which restatement of the obvious is the first duty of intelligent men. - Orwell
Cpt Obvious
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
Germany3073 Posts
January 14 2007 04:51 GMT
#171
mora stop making long ass posts, i havent yet found the time to read your 3-hour-epos because you keep spilling out posts with over 1,000 characters...shut up and let me finish reading first

but as far as i can see, very insightful and motivating.
Nobody ever reads signatures of people like me, do they?
Tien
Profile Joined January 2003
Russian Federation4447 Posts
January 14 2007 05:31 GMT
#172
Why are you afraid to die?

I'm not.


I also agree with Mora.


It is the optimists that drive humanity forward. Humans would have been extinct long ago if everyone sat around saying "whats the point?".


The point is you can either help humanity go forward and do great things in your life or you can sit around and say "whats the point" and let life pass you by while you accomplish nothing.
We decide our own destiny
Tien
Profile Joined January 2003
Russian Federation4447 Posts
January 14 2007 05:38 GMT
#173
I don't think my life will have made any real difference, and I'm somewhat troubled by it,


When I realized that it was my choice to make, whether my life made a difference or not, my life changed 180 degrees.


If you think you won't make a real difference, you won't. If you think you will make a difference, you will.


We all make choices in our lives, choosing mediocrity / indifference / or unhappiness is suicidal.
We decide our own destiny
Mora
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada5235 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-01-14 05:56:46
January 14 2007 05:55 GMT
#174
On January 14 2007 14:38 Tien wrote:
Show nested quote +
I don't think my life will have made any real difference, and I'm somewhat troubled by it,

When I realized that it was my choice to make, whether my life made a difference or not, my life changed 180 degrees.


I think he's referring to the much grander picture.

Like humanity in a thousand years - or 10 thousand years - or when humanity is extinct.

I think, past the fear of death, it is simply that the only way of 'living forever' is to be remembered, and if that memory is forgotten (cause it most surely will, it's only a matter of time) that you lose even that small grasp of immortality - and that is frightening.
Happiness only real when shared.
Chibi[OWNS]
Profile Joined May 2003
United Kingdom10597 Posts
January 14 2007 06:08 GMT
#175
--- Nuked ---
MTF
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States1739 Posts
January 14 2007 06:23 GMT
#176
On January 14 2007 11:43 Mora wrote:
Ultimately, you need to find something to believe in. Not something you need to convince yourself, but something you can't help but believe. Very much like faith (or i guess it would be faith).


I've been trying that for a long time, but no possibility has offered me comfort yet.

On January 14 2007 11:43 Mora wrote:
So i guess my advice would be to do just that. So far, it's never done me wrong. Avoiding fear never really lets you get away from it, especially of something like death. It's always in the back of your mind, tarnishing even the most joyful of moments - because ultimately you know that they don't matter because you are going to die. This is something that must be defeated. Not only will those moments no longer be tarnished, but they will be influenced just as much by your comfort, and will be more joyful and full than ever before.


While, after more than 3/4th's of my life has been plagued by dealing with this, I do not hold the same high optimism, I definitely have not given up. I try and I try hard. I've been pushing especially hard recently, as I simply hate the thought that my future with her, our wedding day, whatever, could be randomly tainted by these thoughts. Special moments have been lessened and ruined by sudden invasions of these thoughts already, and I most certainly don't want that to carry on.

However, my handle on such has weakened recently, and my reactions consist of literal panic attacks (feeling trapped, not being able to sit still, sometimes randomly shouting out/hitting objects) and occasional boughts of depression.

I hope those who are saying that it's a stupid fear realize that this isn't just something that can be swept aside by willpower if you have it. Not unless you're lying to yourself or stumble upon some wonderful self-realization.
Think. :)
xM(Z
Profile Joined November 2006
Romania5281 Posts
January 14 2007 06:58 GMT
#177
u people think small , really small ; let's say u make something ; something that people will remember u for , then u die all happy and shit of you achievements , accomplishments...
one day later a meteorite hits the earth and brings humanity to extinction - who will remember u then? nobody of course + youre worst fear will come true
1) this is really a lame reason to die happy for
2)one should always think of the bigger picture --(univers ...argmnaorgnaegrae)
And my fury stands ready. I bring all your plans to nought. My bleak heart beats steady. 'Tis you whom I have sought.
xM(Z
Profile Joined November 2006
Romania5281 Posts
January 14 2007 07:04 GMT
#178
also i recommend the movie "Meet Joe Black" Antony Hopkins , Brad Pit
And my fury stands ready. I bring all your plans to nought. My bleak heart beats steady. 'Tis you whom I have sought.
EmS.Radagast
Profile Joined November 2004
Israel280 Posts
January 14 2007 07:16 GMT
#179

If you think you won't make a real difference, you won't. If you think you will make a difference, you will.


No offense, but this strikes me as a very naive statement.

I didn't actually draw the conclusions you talk about - I said it's pointless, but it doesn't stop me from still trying to accomplish things ("do useful things some of the time") just for the fun of it. It makes me feel good when I manage to overcome problems. It's probably comes as no surprise that I'm an engineer, and if I were a little less stupid I might have become a scientist. However, I do my work without any delusions of grandeur - subjectively I might occasionally pull out unbelievable heroics at work, but if you take an honest, objective look at it, you will see it barely makes any real difference to the world we live in...
I mean, if I went back in time and say, caused the railroad/steam engines to be invented 50 years earlier, yea it would make a difference. Developing yet another algorithm or some commercial software codebase (which is what I'm doing these days) has very low chances of impacting the world in any serious way.

There are mind-bogglingly difficult problems and I dare say entire theories (especially in mathematics) that objectively are nothing more than a huge sink for intellectual horsepower that could be utilized for some kind of real-world benefit instead. But the people who put all this vast effort into it don't care, because to them it matters more than anything else.
Actually now that I think of it, I've heard quite a few scientists say with a straight face that their work is completely worthless for any practical purpose, among them one of the most accomplished mathematics professor in my country.

I guess it's just a matter of attitude. I'm aware that the way I see things isn't exactly popular, and I can see why. Just to clarify, I'm not trying to advocate being a lazy bum, only to keep things in perspective, you know...
I know its not THREE-DEE!!
Tien
Profile Joined January 2003
Russian Federation4447 Posts
January 14 2007 07:20 GMT
#180
On January 14 2007 14:55 Mora wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 14 2007 14:38 Tien wrote:
I don't think my life will have made any real difference, and I'm somewhat troubled by it,

When I realized that it was my choice to make, whether my life made a difference or not, my life changed 180 degrees.


I think he's referring to the much grander picture.

Like humanity in a thousand years - or 10 thousand years - or when humanity is extinct.

I think, past the fear of death, it is simply that the only way of 'living forever' is to be remembered, and if that memory is forgotten (cause it most surely will, it's only a matter of time) that you lose even that small grasp of immortality - and that is frightening.


You must remember that we belong to something bigger than just ourselves.

We belong to humanity. 15 000 years from now, one person's actions may not be remembered, but humanity as a whole will, and that is something to be proud of.


To say what we do does not matter but humanity will be exinct trillions and trillions of years from now is completely selfish and foolish.


For example, if you spent your entire life dedicated to helping people find a safe cure of HIV or cancer, imagine the consequences.

You would have helped saved billions and billions of people down the road from suffering / misery. You can equate that to billions of years that you saved people from suffering. All those great minds and optimists that created penecilin, pain killers, cures of asthma, Televisions, microwaves, reliant sources of energy. All these things we all take for granted that help our lives beome easier everyday.

What these people did helped you, what these people did helped me, what these people did will help billions of people.

How can you say it doesn't matter? It sure as hell matters to that kid that is about to have his leg amputated and is glad that pain killers exist.


Im not saying you need to be the next person to cure cancer and be remembered forever, but you need to belong to that group of optimistic individuals who continue to drive humanity forward and make the lives of everyone around them better.
We decide our own destiny
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