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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
wherebugsgo
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Japan10647 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-06-13 03:10:35
June 13 2015 03:10 GMT
#12621
this convo reminds me of this

[image loading]
IgnE
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7681 Posts
June 13 2015 04:38 GMT
#12622
It's just funny to me to hear a dude talk about finding a "fuck buddy" when he's a 20 something virgin.
The unrealistic sound of these propositions is indicative, not of their utopian character, but of the strength of the forces which prevent their realization.
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States23587 Posts
June 13 2015 04:55 GMT
#12623
On June 13 2015 13:38 IgnE wrote:
It's just funny to me to hear a dude talk about finding a "fuck buddy" when he's a 20 something virgin.



ikr. I'm not going to dog the guy or anything but I'm looking forward to hearing how this turns out. Maybe things are different since the last time I found a fb. Admittedly it was before tinder was a thing.
"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
June 13 2015 07:12 GMT
#12624
On June 13 2015 13:38 IgnE wrote:
It's just funny to me to hear a dude talk about finding a "fuck buddy" when he's a 20 something virgin.


Haha why? I'm 22.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
shouldbeworking
Profile Joined October 2014
946 Posts
June 13 2015 07:32 GMT
#12625
On June 13 2015 16:12 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 13 2015 13:38 IgnE wrote:
It's just funny to me to hear a dude talk about finding a "fuck buddy" when he's a 20 something virgin.


Haha why? I'm 22.


Babysteps buddy. I think you mean you just want to find a casual encounter. Fuck buddies would generally be a mutual relationship where you both fuck well enough for each other. Then just meet up to fuck regularly.

If you're a virgin the assumption is you're more of a nub and not really experience enough to maintain that sort of relationship. Who knows though, you could be a stallion out of the gate. Have you been hitting the gym and practicing your kegels? If not there's always coke and Viagra.
Ange777
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
Germany1164 Posts
June 13 2015 07:33 GMT
#12626
On June 12 2015 17:14 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Being a virgin isn't something that has bothered me at all, if I wanted just to lose it I would have done it a long time ago. However now I don't really give a shit anymore. I'm more worried that it will scare her away. Do you think I should tell her before or after. During is probably a very bad idea.

Please please please tell her before!
♥ Sen - 台灣之光 ♥
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
June 13 2015 08:04 GMT
#12627
On June 13 2015 16:32 shouldbeworking wrote:

Babysteps buddy. I think you mean you just want to find a casual encounter. Fuck buddies would generally be a mutual relationship where you both fuck well enough for each other. Then just meet up to fuck regularly.


I def don't just want to fuck a random girl just to have it over with, couldn't care less about the "virgin" thing. With the amount of sex I plan of having my intention is not to be bad for very long either. Well we'll see how this turns out, I'll probably tell her once we have a set date planned.

Honestly don't know everyone are getting their panties in a twist. It's amusing.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45227 Posts
June 13 2015 14:35 GMT
#12628
On June 13 2015 17:04 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 13 2015 16:32 shouldbeworking wrote:

Babysteps buddy. I think you mean you just want to find a casual encounter. Fuck buddies would generally be a mutual relationship where you both fuck well enough for each other. Then just meet up to fuck regularly.


I def don't just want to fuck a random girl just to have it over with, couldn't care less about the "virgin" thing. With the amount of sex I plan of having my intention is not to be bad for very long either. Well we'll see how this turns out, I'll probably tell her once we have a set date planned.

Honestly don't know everyone are getting their panties in a twist. It's amusing.


Yeah I think it's just the way you worded it that seemed a bit over-the-top, considering your lack of experience in the field. I think shouldbeworking explained what you really mean anyway, and I think we can all figure out what you're talking about, but semantically your original statement sounded a little funny. I think "casual encounter" is a more appropriate term to use than "fuck buddy" if you're not looking for a serious relationship, not looking to only booty call/ fuck like rabbits, but keeping the idea open for sex if it gets there.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
killa_robot
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada1884 Posts
June 13 2015 18:19 GMT
#12629
On June 12 2015 17:14 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Okay so the first girl in my last post has not answered. I guess she is not interested.

I did however take contact with yet another girl who started talking to me before. Told her that I wanted a fuck buddy and she seemed interested, we're going to meet up one day when we are both free.

Show nested quote +
On June 12 2015 09:43 IgnE wrote:
Wait. Are you a virgin?


UHHHH busted. Not for much longer though hopefully


Show nested quote +
On June 12 2015 10:07 Aveng3r wrote:
But if ur a virgin I wouldnt recommend it


There is no stopping this yolo train.


Being a virgin isn't something that has bothered me at all, if I wanted just to lose it I would have done it a long time ago. However now I don't really give a shit anymore. I'm more worried that it will scare her away. Do you think I should tell her before or after. During is probably a very bad idea.



The correct answer is no, don't tell her. There's no reason to. If you do and she knows you're just looking for sex, she's going to get very suspicious that it's just so you can lose your virginity.

Google how to have sex if you really think you're inept, but it's not exactly rocket science.
Laurens
Profile Joined September 2010
Belgium4553 Posts
June 15 2015 07:01 GMT
#12630
There are definitely reasons to.

You can claim it's not rocket science but let's be honest, you're not gonna make a great impression on your first go

Someone looking for fuckbuddies on Tinder probably has certain expectations. If you don't tell her beforehand, chances are she'll figure it out herself, or just think you're terrible in bed. Pretty awkward for everyone involved.

That said, I don't think it's trivial to just find a fuckbuddy on Tinder lol, not in Belgium at least. Let us know how it goes xD
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32107 Posts
June 16 2015 15:29 GMT
#12631
On June 13 2015 17:04 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 13 2015 16:32 shouldbeworking wrote:

Babysteps buddy. I think you mean you just want to find a casual encounter. Fuck buddies would generally be a mutual relationship where you both fuck well enough for each other. Then just meet up to fuck regularly.


With the amount of sex I plan of having my intention is not to be bad for very long either.


THINK LIKE A CHAMPION

may your cock's aim be true
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Fi0na
Profile Joined February 2014
0 Posts
June 16 2015 18:12 GMT
#12632
On June 17 2015 00:29 QuanticHawk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 13 2015 17:04 bloodwhore~ wrote:
On June 13 2015 16:32 shouldbeworking wrote:

Babysteps buddy. I think you mean you just want to find a casual encounter. Fuck buddies would generally be a mutual relationship where you both fuck well enough for each other. Then just meet up to fuck regularly.


With the amount of sex I plan of having my intention is not to be bad for very long either.


THINK LIKE A CHAMPION

may your cock's aim be true


"A man's reach must exceed his grasp, or what's a penis for?"
I loved that show.
Life is not fair. But that's what chocolate is for.
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
June 16 2015 18:23 GMT
#12633
So I told her today. Told I never had sex, but explained why etc. She said it was really unexpected. Took it kinda well, she said she can't promise that we will have sex and it will depend on how it feels etc which is kinda obvious. We will probably do something on saturday though.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18194 Posts
June 16 2015 20:23 GMT
#12634
That is not very surprising. She thinks you're some hot stuff, wanting to be fuckbuddies, and then you say "well, before we have sex, you should know that I'm a virgin". That's like the opposite of what you were broadcasting (consciously or not) before.

I mean, you might be Podrick Payne, but more likely you're like the vast majority of people the first time: fumbling around awkwardly at first, and then not being able to control yourself and orgasm after 20 seconds.
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States23587 Posts
June 16 2015 20:58 GMT
#12635
On June 17 2015 05:23 Acrofales wrote:
That is not very surprising. She thinks you're some hot stuff, wanting to be fuckbuddies, and then you say "well, before we have sex, you should know that I'm a virgin". That's like the opposite of what you were broadcasting (consciously or not) before.

I mean, you might be Podrick Payne, but more likely you're like the vast majority of people the first time: fumbling around awkwardly at first, and then not being able to control yourself and orgasm after 20 seconds.


I feel like I would be expecting her to ask for a d*ck pic? Maybe that's just my schema for these types of situations but I'd frankly be surprised if she met up on Saturday without an impressive one lol. Of course blood's also done the opposite of what I would expect so I could be way off.
"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
zdarr
Profile Joined September 2010
France375 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-06-16 21:40:30
June 16 2015 21:40 GMT
#12636
On June 13 2015 11:43 GoTuNk! wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 13 2015 11:33 Zooper31 wrote:
On June 13 2015 00:40 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On June 12 2015 17:14 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Being a virgin isn't something that has bothered me at all, if I wanted just to lose it I would have done it a long time ago. However now I don't really give a shit anymore. I'm more worried that it will scare her away. Do you think I should tell her before or after. During is probably a very bad idea.


I would tell her first... plenty of women find it cute or endearing or respectable or exciting, rather than running away. Or they don't really give a shit.


Agreed. If you don't tell her, she's probably going to assume your shit in bed and had no clue what you were doing. It's going to make things awkward during sex too because she's going to assume you know what you're doing and it's gonna be weird when you can't even put it in... Just tell her right before the fact so she has a clue on how to proceed.


I think you should tell her ONLY if she seems really experienced and the kind of girl who would like to take control in the situation. Sex is both exiting and very scary for woman, even not virgin ones, and saying something like that will def put most of them off; you can tell her afterwards.



why only ? I was kinda stressed about it but i told the girl and she was fine with it. It amused her it stressed me. I told my story to a lot of different girl since then and they all agreed to say they couldn't care less. Girls care less about that then men (meeting a virgin girl) in my experience
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
June 16 2015 21:48 GMT
#12637

I mean, you might be Podrick Payne, but more likely you're like the vast majority of people the first time: fumbling around awkwardly at first, and then not being able to control yourself and orgasm after 20 seconds.


Yeah, I told her this in the text I sent her.

I feel like I would be expecting her to ask for a d*ck pic? Maybe that's just my schema for these types of situations but I'd frankly be surprised if she met up on Saturday without an impressive one lol. Of course blood's also done the opposite of what I would expect so I could be way off.


Yeah... I'm not going to send a d*ck pic, even if she were to ask for one. It's not like there is a 100% we're going to have sex either, would be somewhat weird to decide that over text when we have never seen eachother even though I have said that it exactly what I want. I'm not 100% if I want to fuck her since I haven't seen her in real. Real life differs from pictures.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
JoeCool
Profile Joined January 2012
Germany2520 Posts
June 16 2015 22:32 GMT
#12638
Last saturday I've visited a friend of mine and she introduced me to her best friend, a 29 year old girl. The following day my friend told me, that the girl was/is interested in me and complimented about my looks/perfume/character/etc. when the two of them were alone.
Now the first problem is her relationship status, she wants to break up with her "boyfriend" - or already broke up with him - but according to him they are still a couple. So it's basically like this: she says she is single and he says she's not.
Second problem, the guy is a monster. He is like 6.7 ft (2 metres) high and 286 lbs (130kgs) heavy, indepted, a bouncer and has already been to jail multiple times.

On one hand and after all the things I've heard from my friend I'm convinced that they are not a real couple anymore, it's basically just him beeing an agressive prick and she's scared. Which is why I believe that their might be a chance.
On the other hand ... I'm not so sure about her. And I kinda love my life so I do not want to end it soonish.
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
June 16 2015 22:35 GMT
#12639
I myself would be wary of getting together with a girl who dumped her boyfriend for you after meeting you once.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-06-16 22:49:05
June 16 2015 22:45 GMT
#12640
On June 17 2015 03:23 bloodwhore~ wrote:
So I told her today. Told I never had sex, but explained why etc.

Noooo! Don't explain why, etc.
Just state it as a fact, be proud of it, like it's normal. Only if she starts asking, showing interest tell her. With next chick tell her only after you see her in person too imo.
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
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