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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On April 15 2015 08:32 Shotcoder wrote:
Continuing what This man is saying ^^^^
How can you tell if your married friend(who I may or may not be sleeping with) is looking for a way out of her marriage or just finding a way to tide herself over? Btw I do not condone my behavior in anyway.
You could just ask her?
I wouldn't enter into a relationship with someone who openly cheats, as that's just a recipe for irony when she cheats on you...
And yeah, obligatory "tsk tsk homewrecker" 
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On April 16 2015 11:12 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Show nested quote +On April 15 2015 08:32 Shotcoder wrote:
Continuing what This man is saying ^^^^
How can you tell if your married friend(who I may or may not be sleeping with) is looking for a way out of her marriage or just finding a way to tide herself over? Btw I do not condone my behavior in anyway. You could just ask her? I wouldn't enter into a relationship with someone who openly cheats, as that's just a recipe for irony when she cheats on you... And yeah, obligatory "tsk tsk homewrecker"
Yeah this pretty much. Wouldn't get into the morals of homewrecker because she sounds like she'd do it anyways.
Sounds like a good fuck buddy though, if you can keep it on that level it's fine
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On April 13 2015 01:28 lohdon wrote:Show nested quote +On April 12 2015 20:18 LemOn wrote:On April 12 2015 17:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Talked about a girl who had a boyfriend earlier in this thread.
Anyway. She removed her 'is in a relationship' status, I then asked her if she wanted to go for a walk, she said yes and we went for a two hour walk. At the end of the walk I asked if she wanted to grab dinner with me. She then said 'you know I still have a boyfriend', we just sort of stared at each other for a while and she told me that things between them weren't really good and that she hadn't seen him for a few days. Rejected, I hugged her goodbye and went home.
The day after I got a text saying she wants to swing by my place, I was not home at the time she sent it and sent back a text later asking if she wanted anything special. She didn't respond to that. So I asked her if she was roleplaying an ent from lotr. Got a text yesterday saying that she broke up with her boyfriend. I just responded with "Okey. I'm not sure what you want me do with this information. You already know what I want."
I guess grab a dinner means "grab a boob"?  I'm actually curious what people think about going out with a girl on a rebound. Because the end of the relationship sucked of course and neither had their needs met... And after a breakup you just look for anything to get validation, fill the void... Pretty much look for anyone. When I broke up with my last GF she was active on tinder...the very same night (as was I lol). So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother. In general I don't think it's a good idea if you are looking for something serious. Bouncing from one relationship into the next kind of shows that you aren't committing to your relationships. Especially if the breakup didn't happen before showing interest.
I mean like longer term rebounds that don't really tell you anything bad about her per se.
Like I'm seeing this girl, doing everything right I think. I'm busy during the week so pretty much no contact, call her 1x per week to set a date, then plan something fun+memorable. We always have a great time, she's over me like a teenager, I got her to really open up about her family, she volunteers her phone, talks about me to her friends, they text her during the date even, teasing, shares family stories etc.
When she slid over a picture of her ex while showing me all her photos she was like "yeah a guy tells you he's still in love with you after 2 years but then doesn't want to have anything to do with you" - it kinda made sense why she doesn't text much between dates (besides playing games. Which she does love.)
I mean I'm not actually asking a question - I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, 1x date per week, have a great time, not take it too seriously, give her space and wait for her to bring up getting serious herself whenever she gets over her ex (it's been a few months to half a year since they broke up). She's 20 so I guess she doesn't know you just burn/delete everything when you break up with someone yet so you forget faster.
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What's your stance on hooking up/taking on dates girls that live with their boyfriend guys (but say they want to leave them/have cheated on them before). Obviously not a girlfriend material (lol) but how'd you personally feel about dating them casually?
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On April 23 2015 04:57 LemOn wrote:
What's your stance on hooking up/taking on dates girls that live with their boyfriend guys (but say they want to leave them/have cheated on them before). Obviously not a girlfriend material (lol) but how'd you personally feel about dating them casually?
Can it be called dating when she's fucking other guys in addition to you? Pretty much just fuck buddies at that point if anything.
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I do not see an issue, especially since "cheating" as a concept can provide a good kink to play around with.
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Well since you asked about our personal opinion.. I despise that kind of behavior so I dont go near people who act that way.
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Think I saw someone I know casually on a dating site. She talked to me a few times but had a bf at the time. She looks nice on OKC, in person I wasn't interested in her. I was interested in someone prettier. Oh well, I can't message her for free but she's on FB.
One of my friends gf of 3 months asked for space. He seems pretty beat up over it. Not sure how I can help. We talked Sunday and he says he feels like shit today. Advice?
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My luck ? So bad. I'm deaf, so they won't say to you personnaly that it makes them cringes somewhat by the idea of going with a disabled guy. They smiply won't tell you that. Got like "Aww, I'm sorry you seem like the nice kind of guy, I'm pretty sure you'll find one nice girl ! Keep up !" Why, oh why wouldn't they be the fucking one for a fucking change ?
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On April 23 2015 16:03 RaiZ wrote:
My luck ? So bad. I'm deaf, so they won't say to you personnaly that it makes them cringes somewhat by the idea of going with a disabled guy. They smiply won't tell you that. Got like "Aww, I'm sorry you seem like the nice kind of guy, I'm pretty sure you'll find one nice girl ! Keep up !" Why, oh why wouldn't they be the fucking one for a fucking change ?
not sure if there is any comfort in that: but non-disabled people get exactly the same sort of bullshit, or at least i did, and i wouldn't consider my social ineptitude big enough to count as a disability 
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On April 23 2015 14:34 obesechicken13 wrote:
Think I saw someone I know casually on a dating site. She talked to me a few times but had a bf at the time. She looks nice on OKC, in person I wasn't interested in her. I was interested in someone prettier. Oh well, I can't message her for free but she's on FB.
One of my friends gf of 3 months asked for space. He seems pretty beat up over it. Not sure how I can help. We talked Sunday and he says he feels like shit today. Advice?
IMO if a girl "needs space" you need to pull out ASAP.
Means you don't bring her joy being with her so if that's the case wtf is the point.
(that is unless he really is exaggerating like texting every minute of every day and needing to know what she's doing all the time)
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On April 23 2015 16:47 Fyodor wrote:Show nested quote +On April 23 2015 14:34 obesechicken13 wrote:
Think I saw someone I know casually on a dating site. She talked to me a few times but had a bf at the time. She looks nice on OKC, in person I wasn't interested in her. I was interested in someone prettier. Oh well, I can't message her for free but she's on FB.
One of my friends gf of 3 months asked for space. He seems pretty beat up over it. Not sure how I can help. We talked Sunday and he says he feels like shit today. Advice? IMO if a girl "needs space" you need to pull out ASAP. Means you don't bring her joy being with her so if that's the case wtf is the point. (that is unless he really is exaggerating like texting every minute of every day and needing to know what she's doing all the time)
Yeah this is super important, tell him to state clearly that when she changes her mind to get in touch. then cease all contact altogether. When girls need space they mean it, and when they even verbalize it directly it' gone pretty far and your friend was screwing up somewhere
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Needing space is usually code for "I'm going to break up with you, but I don't have the courage to do it right now so I'd rather string you along".
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On April 23 2015 05:14 Zooper31 wrote:Show nested quote +On April 23 2015 04:57 LemOn wrote:
What's your stance on hooking up/taking on dates girls that live with their boyfriend guys (but say they want to leave them/have cheated on them before). Obviously not a girlfriend material (lol) but how'd you personally feel about dating them casually? Can it be called dating when she's fucking other guys in addition to you? Pretty much just fuck buddies at that point if anything.
Yah, I mean, what's the difference between a fuckbuddy and dating really - just skip the coffee/drinks? I don't stay in touch inbetween dates anyways besides setting them up even with girls I really like
I'll need to go on a normal date at first anyways no? And once she'd been to mine just tell her to come over next time, and put in less of an effort?
I guess I just have to be careful not to get too attached myself/ I see other girls in the meantime anyways tho
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On April 23 2015 04:57 LemOn wrote:
What's your stance on hooking up/taking on dates girls that live with their boyfriend guys (but say they want to leave them/have cheated on them before). Obviously not a girlfriend material (lol) but how'd you personally feel about dating them casually?
I'm all for it really. Just don't pay for anything. Unless it's drinks and you think things could go your way lol.
Could be girlfriend material depending on the circumstance though, don't be too quick to judge why she wants out.
Maybe just be up front that you want sex and that's what it is about? Up to you.
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I have 3 dates plan.
I will ask her if she wants to go watch a movie, very late one preferably. Drinking couple of beers and entering late-night cinema always works.
I will ask her if she wants to have breakfast. Unlike me, girls like having breakfast outside. Breakfast is a very late meal time for me that i can eat almost anything as start. I will pick a good place by the sea or with fresh air to fullfill this romance.
I will ask her if she wants to have some desserts after work. I know a good place again, serving quality waffles, it would be good after a hard day.
Question IS: I'll buy F L O W E R S . Y E S . 2 0 1 5 . Can you advice me a type and which time i should take em with me. Breakfast? Roses?
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treating human interactions like starcraft builds?
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On April 24 2015 02:38 lastpuritan wrote:
I have 3 dates plan.
I will ask her if she wants to go watch a movie, very late one preferably. Drinking couple of beers and entering late-night cinema always works.
I will ask her if she wants to have breakfast. Unlike me, girls like having breakfast outside. Breakfast is a very late meal time for me that i can eat almost anything as start. I will pick a good place by the sea or with fresh air to fullfill this romance.
I will ask her if she wants to have some desserts after work. I know a good place again, serving quality waffles, it would be good after a hard day.
Question IS: I'll buy F L O W E R S . Y E S . 2 0 1 5 . Can you advice me a type and which time i should take em with me. Breakfast? Roses?
This is creepy bro.
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On April 24 2015 02:38 lastpuritan wrote:
I have 3 dates plan.
I will ask her if she wants to go watch a movie, very late one preferably. Drinking couple of beers and entering late-night cinema always works.
I will ask her if she wants to have breakfast. Unlike me, girls like having breakfast outside. Breakfast is a very late meal time for me that i can eat almost anything as start. I will pick a good place by the sea or with fresh air to fullfill this romance.
I will ask her if she wants to have some desserts after work. I know a good place again, serving quality waffles, it would be good after a hard day.
Question IS: I'll buy F L O W E R S . Y E S . 2 0 1 5 . Can you advice me a type and which time i should take em with me. Breakfast? Roses?
Whatever it is you do, just make sure you wash your hands.
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EPT
