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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On May 06 2015 03:20 GoTuNk! wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 03:13 Chocolate wrote:On May 06 2015 02:48 SixStrings wrote: Half your age plus four is the cutoff, right? trust your gut better rule of thumb: if your friends would give you shit for it or her parents would be upset about your age, she's too young also I'm pretty sure it's half your age plus 7. I don't think 18 year olds should be messing around with 13 year olds lol. After 18 everything goes. After 16 if you are 18 or younger. If her parents or your friends give you shit it's a non issue. If your friends give you shit for dating a beautiful, younger woman, you need new friends. Legally everything goes but that doesn't make it right. I find it hard to believe a 50 year old could have an equitable relationship with an 18 year old
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On May 06 2015 03:20 GoTuNk! wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 03:13 Chocolate wrote:On May 06 2015 02:48 SixStrings wrote: Half your age plus four is the cutoff, right? trust your gut better rule of thumb: if your friends would give you shit for it or her parents would be upset about your age, she's too young also I'm pretty sure it's half your age plus 7. I don't think 18 year olds should be messing around with 13 year olds lol. After 18 everything goes. After 16 if you are 18 or younger. If her parents or your friends give you shit it's a non issue. If your friends give you shit for dating a beautiful, younger woman, you need new friends. that highly depends on the standard for friendship, if you have good righteous friends, listening to their advice on social norms is not a bad idea
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On May 06 2015 03:22 Chocolate wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 03:20 GoTuNk! wrote:On May 06 2015 03:13 Chocolate wrote:On May 06 2015 02:48 SixStrings wrote: Half your age plus four is the cutoff, right? trust your gut better rule of thumb: if your friends would give you shit for it or her parents would be upset about your age, she's too young also I'm pretty sure it's half your age plus 7. I don't think 18 year olds should be messing around with 13 year olds lol. After 18 everything goes. After 16 if you are 18 or younger. If her parents or your friends give you shit it's a non issue. If your friends give you shit for dating a beautiful, younger woman, you need new friends. Legally everything goes but that doesn't make it right. I find it hard to believe a 50 year old could have an equitable relationship with an 18 year old
Relationships are never equitable. I don't think there is anything morally wrong with dating younger woman. This is assuming you are dating because you both like each other, not because you are paying her stuff or other things that also happen in same age relationship that I consider wrong.
I do think there is something wrong if you want to date someone, and you hold back because of what other people might think about you.
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I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't.
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On May 06 2015 03:22 Chocolate wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 03:20 GoTuNk! wrote:On May 06 2015 03:13 Chocolate wrote:On May 06 2015 02:48 SixStrings wrote: Half your age plus four is the cutoff, right? trust your gut better rule of thumb: if your friends would give you shit for it or her parents would be upset about your age, she's too young also I'm pretty sure it's half your age plus 7. I don't think 18 year olds should be messing around with 13 year olds lol. After 18 everything goes. After 16 if you are 18 or younger. If her parents or your friends give you shit it's a non issue. If your friends give you shit for dating a beautiful, younger woman, you need new friends. Legally everything goes but that doesn't make it right. I find it hard to believe a 50 year old could have an equitable relationship with an 18 year old
I don't think it has anything to do with being equitable or whatever else.
Ostensibly there really isn't anything wrong with an 18 year old and a 50 year old having a relationship. The way we view that now is that obviously one is a sugar daddy or mommy or whatever but this isn't ALWAYS the case.
It is very possible for two people with that large of an age difference to be in a relationship with one another because there is actual attraction and chemistry there. Rare? Yes. People of those ages tend to be in very different places in their lives. That doesn't make it automatically wrong though.
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On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't. you have my blessing.
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When it works, it works. Age should never be a reason. If you like each other, nothing else matters.
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On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't.
The "rule" is half your age minus plus seven, not four. 27 to 18 is iffy, depends highly on the individuals.
edit: oops.
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On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't.
My respects to you good sir
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On May 06 2015 04:43 Najda wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't. The "rule" is half your age minus seven, not four. 27 to 18 is iffy, depends highly on the individuals.
You mean Plus seven I hope?
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On May 06 2015 09:36 GoTuNk! wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't. My respects to you good sir I'm 21, she's 33. Feels file.
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On May 06 2015 10:53 Slayers_Red.Cracker wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 04:43 Najda wrote:On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't. The "rule" is half your age minus seven, not four. 27 to 18 is iffy, depends highly on the individuals. You mean Plus seven I hope?
haha yes, thanks, that's quite the difference. We don't need 40 year olds dating 13 year olds.
You can do [(Your Age) - 7)]*2 to find your upper limit, which is where I got the minus from.
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On May 06 2015 03:30 SixStrings wrote: I meant "half your age plus four" with the qualification that she has to be legal in your country. I'm assuming 21 in the US land 16 everywhere else.
In my case: I'm 27, she's 18. It feels a bit weird, but on paper it shouldn't.
Wont you get bored or annoyed of her after a few week anyway? I dont mean that offensive. But the 18-20 year olds I meet (im 29) just lack the intellectual capability and/or aren not emotional mature enough to consider them for a realtionship.
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Well, I already told her that I can't have a relationship with her because I'm going abroad soon, but she doesn't seem to care.
I still feel a bit uncomfortable with our arrangement, because she's still a pupil. Which is also the beauty of our arrangement: her parents don't allow her to sleep over, so she always leaves after a couole of hours.
When it comes to maturity, I don't think it's too bad. Her parents are wealthy and she has seen most of the world and has amazing stories to tell already. I still feel awfully guilty every time we meet.
Moving on: Last week I decided to take the tram for us, was sat opposite a green haired angel who was playing Ocarina of Time on her 3ds, decided to talk to her and we're meeting tomorrow! Really nice break from the Tinder-dates, I gotta tell you! Plus, it was a rainy day, my hair was frizzy and stupid, so she's already seen me at my worst. With the sun as my ally, I'll sweep her off her feet tomorrow!
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i am 24 she is 19 and she wants marriage hows that
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On May 06 2015 17:11 lastpuritan wrote: i am 24 she is 19 and she wants marriage hows that
I think that's sweet.
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On May 06 2015 16:54 SixStrings wrote: Well, I already told her that I can't have a relationship with her because I'm going abroad soon, but she doesn't seem to care.
I still feel a bit uncomfortable with our arrangement, because she's still a pupil. Which is also the beauty of our arrangement: her parents don't allow her to sleep over, so she always leaves after a couole of hours.
When it comes to maturity, I don't think it's too bad. Her parents are wealthy and she has seen most of the world and has amazing stories to tell already. I still feel awfully guilty every time we meet.
Dont feel guilty. To me it seems she is using you just as much as you are using her
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On May 06 2015 17:59 Snotling wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 16:54 SixStrings wrote: Well, I already told her that I can't have a relationship with her because I'm going abroad soon, but she doesn't seem to care.
I still feel a bit uncomfortable with our arrangement, because she's still a pupil. Which is also the beauty of our arrangement: her parents don't allow her to sleep over, so she always leaves after a couole of hours.
When it comes to maturity, I don't think it's too bad. Her parents are wealthy and she has seen most of the world and has amazing stories to tell already. I still feel awfully guilty every time we meet.
Dont feel guilty. To me it seems she is using you just as much as you are using her
Thanks, never thought of it that way. That's kind of hot.
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On May 06 2015 18:27 SixStrings wrote:Show nested quote +On May 06 2015 17:59 Snotling wrote:On May 06 2015 16:54 SixStrings wrote: Well, I already told her that I can't have a relationship with her because I'm going abroad soon, but she doesn't seem to care.
I still feel a bit uncomfortable with our arrangement, because she's still a pupil. Which is also the beauty of our arrangement: her parents don't allow her to sleep over, so she always leaves after a couole of hours.
When it comes to maturity, I don't think it's too bad. Her parents are wealthy and she has seen most of the world and has amazing stories to tell already. I still feel awfully guilty every time we meet.
Dont feel guilty. To me it seems she is using you just as much as you are using her Thanks, never thought of it that way. That's kind of hot.
Older dude musician boyfriend, you are perfect to make her parents mad and her friends jealous :D.
On the other hand: if I was her dad, I would hunt you with a rifle.
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I'm finally willing to admit I might have a porn addiction. After a complete lack of success with women for years (which quite frankly stems from a completely wrong approach to women as people I think) I'm going to give NoFap a go for a while and see if things improve. After reading through the list of reported positive effects on the subreddit (and watching the Ted talk on the subject) I'm hoping this helps me be the person I want to be. There was a scary amount of overlap between that list of symptoms of your brain on porn/potential positive effects and what I consider wrong with my life/attitude at the moment, so I'm hopeful.
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