EPTDating: How's your luck? - Page 472
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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solidbebe
Netherlands4921 Posts
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Kleinmuuhg
Vanuatu4091 Posts
On May 22 2014 22:33 solidbebe wrote: Inb4 she wants to see the post and is freaked out by the thread luckily he removed his earlier post where he said she looked like she was easy | ||
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Ctone23
United States1839 Posts
On May 22 2014 15:15 -Jacob- wrote: From what I have learned, using dating apps on smart phones blow. I currently use POF (plenty of fish) and half the girls I try and talk to (even if they are interested in me first) end up being very short. By that I mean in their answers and questions. I was trying to talk to this cute girl a year younger than me, and all her answers were one word answers so I just gave up and moved on. About a week later she tried talking to me again so I thought I would give her a chance and once again she answered with one word answers. I find it better to just go out with a group of friends or even to the bar (Just order a light beer if you don't drink) and try to talk to a girl there. Its better to talk in person with a stranger that you aren't on a first date with than trying to connect over a dating site/app I think they are what you make of them. Obviously it is superficial. You are judging each other on looks and a 160 character profile explanation which typically always reads something like "I'm super awesome, non-judgmental, friends say i'm amazing, blah, blah, blah". Take that with a grain of salt, everyone always oversells, and uses younger pictures. That being said, what harm is there to ask a pretty girl out for a drink, or some dinner? Worst thing is she could say no.. Same for when you meet a girl in person, just ask, I promise it won't end in tragedy! If they are seeing someone, they will tell you, if they aren't interested, again, they will tell you. | ||
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Thereisnosaurus
Australia1822 Posts
Inb4 she wants to see the post and is freaked out by the thread luckily he removed his earlier post where he said she looked like she was easy you know, normally I don't make comments on this kind of thing but as it directly pertains to me... Have you ever wondered why there aren't a lot of ladies who enjoy hanging around the starcraft social scene? Comments like that. I agree that now if I mentioned this to her and she wanted to see it she'd probably find it less great than she otherwise might, not because of the existing thread, I'm sure having hung around TL and other gamer sites before she's used to manxiety, but because of the comments you gents made subsequently that presuppose on her personally. Sometimes this thread reminds me of this quote: "Bud's relationship with the female sex was governed by a gallimaufry of primal impulses, dim suppositions, deranged theories, overheard scraps of conversation, half-remembered pieces of bad advice, and fragments of no-doubt exaggerated anecdotes that amounted to rank superstition." (from 'the diamond age') I'd dearly love to drag the tone up a notch, if anyone would like thoughts or advice that is mostly based on empathy, reason and ethical practice, feel free to ask... | ||
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Orcasgt24
Canada3238 Posts
On May 23 2014 13:58 Thereisnosaurus wrote: you know, normally I don't make comments on this kind of thing but as it directly pertains to me... Have you ever wondered why there aren't a lot of ladies who enjoy hanging around the starcraft social scene? Comments like that. I agree that now if I mentioned this to her and she wanted to see it she'd probably find it less great than she otherwise might, not because of the existing thread, I'm sure having hung around TL and other gamer sites before she's used to manxiety, but because of the comments you gents made subsequently that presuppose on her personally. Sometimes this thread reminds me of this quote: "Bud's relationship with the female sex was governed by a gallimaufry of primal impulses, dim suppositions, deranged theories, overheard scraps of conversation, half-remembered pieces of bad advice, and fragments of no-doubt exaggerated anecdotes that amounted to rank superstition." (from 'the diamond age') I'd dearly love to drag the tone up a notch, if anyone would like thoughts or advice that is mostly based on empathy, reason and ethical practice, feel free to ask... Ladies don't hang around the Starcraft scene because video gaming is still seen as a predominantly male activity and 99% of games made are targeted at male audiences. This thread has no relation to why women don't hang around the starcraft scene. In fact I bet I could show this thread to any girl I want and she would happily read every single post and probably create an account to start replying in it | ||
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Thereisnosaurus
Australia1822 Posts
Ladies don't hang around the Starcraft scene because video gaming is still seen as a predominantly male activity and 99% of games made are targeted at male audiences. The first is just reinforcing my point- there is a reason why this is the case- the second is, while not demonstrably false, clearly hyperbole. I can certainly say there are a lot more games targeted at males than there are targeted at females. That 99% of games are actively targeted at men over women is absurd and buys into the typically gender-polarised view that I just brought up. "video gaming is still seen as a predominantly male activity" is what is called a 'general summary', which smooshes together a number of different causal factors, without actually describing any of them, into an observation. You mistake effect for cause. Women who I have shown threads like this in the past have tended to have 'i can either laugh or cry' reactions. As you say, they'd probably be happy to make an account and join in, but neither of those attitudes are particularly heartening given it's a bunch of people who are mostly just frustrated and anxious about not finding enough companionship or intimacy in their lives or worried about losing it when they've just found it. | ||
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Kleinmuuhg
Vanuatu4091 Posts
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arb
Noobville17921 Posts
On May 23 2014 15:47 Thereisnosaurus wrote: The first is just reinforcing my point- there is a reason why this is the case- the second is, while not demonstrably false, clearly hyperbole. I can certainly say there are a lot more games targeted at males than there are targeted at females. That 99% of games are actively targeted at men over women is absurd and buys into the typically gender-polarised view that I just brought up. "video gaming is still seen as a predominantly male activity" is what is called a 'general summary', which smooshes together a number of different causal factors, without actually describing any of them, into an observation. You mistake effect for cause. Women who I have shown threads like this in the past have tended to have 'i can either laugh or cry' reactions. As you say, they'd probably be happy to make an account and join in, but neither of those attitudes are particularly heartening given it's a bunch of people who are mostly just frustrated and anxious about not finding enough companionship or intimacy in their lives or worried about losing it when they've just found it. lol if you find a girl who finds broodwar appealing let me know. I havent found any ever. even korean girls ive talked to here say they like watching it or have family who play but dont play themselves either way you should calm down | ||
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Orcasgt24
Canada3238 Posts
On May 23 2014 15:47 Thereisnosaurus wrote: The first is just reinforcing my point- there is a reason why this is the case- the second is, while not demonstrably false, clearly hyperbole. I can certainly say there are a lot more games targeted at males than there are targeted at females. That 99% of games are actively targeted at men over women is absurd and buys into the typically gender-polarised view that I just brought up. "video gaming is still seen as a predominantly male activity" is what is called a 'general summary', which smooshes together a number of different causal factors, without actually describing any of them, into an observation. You mistake effect for cause. For every game that is targeted mainly to females I can name 100 specifically targeted towards men. It is a fact that games are made for men because they are the largest consumers of them and thus its in a company's best interest to make games appeal to them.. There is nothing absurd about it. It's kinda just the way it is right now. Gender polarizing yes, but true. I wish there was more women playing video games. Literally the only thing about World Of Warcraft I miss is that a larger than the normal percentage of players were female. Playing games like Call of Duty on xbox and I can count on one hand the number of women I run into in a month (excluding friends I play with regularly since one is female) | ||
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Monsen
Germany2548 Posts
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solidbebe
Netherlands4921 Posts
On May 23 2014 13:58 Thereisnosaurus wrote: you know, normally I don't make comments on this kind of thing but as it directly pertains to me... Have you ever wondered why there aren't a lot of ladies who enjoy hanging around the starcraft social scene? Comments like that. I agree that now if I mentioned this to her and she wanted to see it she'd probably find it less great than she otherwise might, not because of the existing thread, I'm sure having hung around TL and other gamer sites before she's used to manxiety, but because of the comments you gents made subsequently that presuppose on her personally. Sometimes this thread reminds me of this quote: "Bud's relationship with the female sex was governed by a gallimaufry of primal impulses, dim suppositions, deranged theories, overheard scraps of conversation, half-remembered pieces of bad advice, and fragments of no-doubt exaggerated anecdotes that amounted to rank superstition." (from 'the diamond age') I'd dearly love to drag the tone up a notch, if anyone would like thoughts or advice that is mostly based on empathy, reason and ethical practice, feel free to ask... I had no idea my post was going to invoke such a reaction but okay. It honestly was meant more as a sorta heads up of what could go wrong. You think every girl would be completely cool with being talked about in a dating thread? I think a good number of them would think it's pretty weird. Anyhow I don't see why you're bringing starcraft and gaming into this as it's not relevant at all. And besides, we do have a few regular female posters in here | ||
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Thereisnosaurus
Australia1822 Posts
I was just trying to be witty (perhabs not obvious enough), but way to overreact. I had no idea my post was going to invoke such a reaction but okay. It honestly was meant more as a sorta heads up of what could go wrong. The reaction, too, emphasizes the issue. Downplay, oh it was just a joke, way to over-react, I don't get it it's not a big deal. In my view (and it's important that I stress this- in my view), a more appropriate reaction would be a) oops, sorry, I didn't mean offense. b) I honestly don't know what I did to provoke such a reaction though, if you're comfortable explaining/discussing it I would appreciate that. The differences there are 1) it doesn't trivialize the other's discomfort, which you may not get, but they still felt. Even if it makes no sense to you, it is still real and that suffering, however incomprehensible, demands your respect. 2) it doesn't presuppose that the other person will be ok discussing it or even listening to you explain why they're wrong to pull you up. Especially when it comes to relationships and especially especially women and sexuality thanks to centuries of enduring power imbalances, not making that presupposition is pretty important to not inadvertently shoving someone into a psychological corner. It's still a good general policy to adopt if you're going to try and discuss something regardless of context... Perhaps I'm over-reacting, perhaps this is utter overkill, but hell, if this thread can't stand one guy calling people for trivial shit and using it to illustrate some basic flaws in common ways of interacting with other human beings, it's not really doing what it set out to do. | ||
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Kleinmuuhg
Vanuatu4091 Posts
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Mina
109 Posts
On May 23 2014 16:36 Orcasgt24 wrote: I wish there was more women playing video games. Literally the only thing about World Of Warcraft I miss is that a larger than the normal percentage of players were female. Playing games like Call of Duty on xbox and I can count on one hand the number of women I run into in a month (excluding friends I play with regularly since one is female) Plenty of women play CoD and other online shooters they just don't advertise that they are women. Why? Because if they kick ass they get trashed and get sent dick pics and if they suck they get trashed and get sent dick pics. Basically, women only use the mic playing with people they know. | ||
dravernor
Netherlands6187 Posts
Fiercely competitive games like Starcraft and Dota ARE predominantly male, as everyone knows, and which probably has something to do with the competitive nature of males. I feel like making a joke right now about women being more drawn to the stronger competitors but I don't think it works quite the same way with gamers  | ||
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solidbebe
Netherlands4921 Posts
On May 23 2014 23:35 Thereisnosaurus wrote: The reaction, too, emphasizes the issue. Downplay, oh it was just a joke, way to over-react, I don't get it it's not a big deal. In my view (and it's important that I stress this- in my view), a more appropriate reaction would be a) oops, sorry, I didn't mean offense. b) I honestly don't know what I did to provoke such a reaction though, if you're comfortable explaining/discussing it I would appreciate that. The differences there are 1) it doesn't trivialize the other's discomfort, which you may not get, but they still felt. Even if it makes no sense to you, it is still real and that suffering, however incomprehensible, demands your respect. 2) it doesn't presuppose that the other person will be ok discussing it or even listening to you explain why they're wrong to pull you up. Especially when it comes to relationships and especially especially women and sexuality thanks to centuries of enduring power imbalances, not making that presupposition is pretty important to not inadvertently shoving someone into a psychological corner. It's still a good general policy to adopt if you're going to try and discuss something regardless of context... Perhaps I'm over-reacting, perhaps this is utter overkill, but hell, if this thread can't stand one guy calling people for trivial shit and using it to illustrate some basic flaws in common ways of interacting with other human beings, it's not really doing what it set out to do. Honestly man I have no idea what you're even trying to say, so I'm just gonna leave it at this. GL with the girl. | ||
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Chocolate
United States2350 Posts
Just chill out and treat girls like people with different machinery and it's all good, no need to freak out over whether a girl plays internet video games or not. | ||
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Fumanchu
Canada669 Posts
I've come to the decision that I'm going to break up with her. My mind is made up about that already, but the question I have is this. When she asks me why I'm breaking up with her, should I tell her the truth, or should I just make something up? | ||
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Orcasgt24
Canada3238 Posts
On May 25 2014 12:01 Fumanchu wrote: I've been seeing this girl for a couple of weeks now. She's pretty cool and all that, but her nutrition side of her life is absolute shit. I thought originally it wouldn't be that big of a deal but it really is a huge turn off for me, especially since I used to be overweight myself and had to make some pretty big lifestyle changes. I've come to the decision that I'm going to break up with her. My mind is made up about that already, but the question I have is this. When she asks me why I'm breaking up with her, should I tell her the truth, or should I just make something up? Tell her the truth. It's easier than lying and truth be told, when she hears your reason she'll be insulted and things should end pretty easily | ||
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
She (crying): But what do you mean I don't understand! You: Shit girl you eat like a goddamn pig | ||
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