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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
sunprince
Profile Joined January 2011
United States2258 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-23 23:57:06
April 23 2013 23:53 GMT
#2401
On April 24 2013 08:09 Orcasgt24 wrote:
I have a date tonight with a new girl from work. She moved to this city like 2 weeks ago. Very excited.


Be careful. Dating people from work has the potential to mess with your career if it ends badly.
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
April 24 2013 00:25 GMT
#2402
On April 24 2013 08:47 sunprince wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 23 2013 23:38 iAmWaKai wrote:
Depends what "being yourself" means. If "yourself" is attractive, then sure, that'll work, but that's not the case for most people.

Depends, being yourself also attracts the people that you'd like to be with. Of course it depends on your goals. If you just want to get laid, do what will increase your chances. But if you're looking for a relationship, you'll attract the wrong people, creating shitty relationships.


That's not necessarily the case. Most men would like to be with an attractive girl, but "being themselves" won't get attract such a girl.

Do you think that cool gamer girl you like would be more attracted to your fat, unemployed, socially awkward gamer self or a successful, fit, and cool gamer self that you could become? Do you seriously think that becoming a cooler person attracts worse people?

Show nested quote +
On April 24 2013 00:19 Steel wrote:
Yeah my point exactly. I guess for sunprince over here being laid is the only thing that matters, and that's cool, but I don't think it's automatically the case for everyone.


You're missing the possibility that becoming a more attractive person (which entails changing yourself and your preferences) might make you happier. For example, let's say you are an unemployed, fat, socially awkward forever-alone. You could "be yourself", and only attract similarly low sexual marketplace value girls (if that), or you could get a job, get in shape, develop social skills, and be happier for it.

Getting laid is not the goal, but it's a symptom of successfully becoming a better, more attractive person.


I agree, it's not just 'being yourself' but rather being the best you that you can be.
Orcasgt24
Profile Joined August 2011
Canada3238 Posts
April 24 2013 02:19 GMT
#2403
On April 24 2013 08:53 sunprince wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 24 2013 08:09 Orcasgt24 wrote:
I have a date tonight with a new girl from work. She moved to this city like 2 weeks ago. Very excited.


Be careful. Dating people from work has the potential to mess with your career if it ends badly.

Oh yes, so true. Very aware of this. Seen it happen at a previous job.
In Hearthstone we pray to RNGesus. When Yogg-Saron hits the field, RNGod gets to work
Shotcoder
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States2316 Posts
April 24 2013 03:46 GMT
#2404
I can't just be a normal guy getting a normal chicks number, noooooo. Gotta get the girl who lives a state over who is home for the weekend... -_-

/flips table

I'm done!
Shotcoder - C+ BW Terran, Gold LoL(ADC Main)
Fran_
Profile Joined June 2010
United States1024 Posts
April 24 2013 03:51 GMT
#2405
On April 24 2013 00:54 FreakOwnageHH wrote:I don't know I just wrote this because I have no idea what to do really ! I know I shouldn't really tell her that I love her , or ask her permission to kiss her, or start talking about what the hell we are doing together. But what should I really do


Hold her hand. If she doesn't let your hand go, kiss her. Job done. It always works. It's really that simple.
B.I.G.
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
3251 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-24 05:03:15
April 24 2013 05:02 GMT
#2406
Seriously the advice of changing who you are and what you like to get girls is like the worst advice I have ever heard. If you want to change you girl chase into some science then by all means, go to the PUA community and start doing whatever it is those sad fucks do to get laid.

Maybe the "just be yourself thing" needs some explanation. It's not about being your own lazy self, but more like the best self you can be. Don't pretend to be something that is totally not you, but rather try to realize what your good qualities are and magnify them. Don't act like the smooth cool guy if your actually a very warm and open person.. Most of my close friends range from decent to really good with girls, and like none of them have the same "approach", and (almost) none of them try to pretend they are someone they're not.

oh and BTW, for the love of god stop giving Freak advice that will make him sound like a whiny bitch before he even got with the girl. You gotta make a person like you BEFORE you dump your shit on them people, it's really basic stuff.
Spidinko
Profile Joined May 2010
Slovakia1174 Posts
April 24 2013 05:15 GMT
#2407
My girlfriend broke up with me after 4 years.. I don't know what to do.
sunprince
Profile Joined January 2011
United States2258 Posts
April 24 2013 05:47 GMT
#2408
On April 24 2013 12:46 Shotcoder wrote:
I can't just be a normal guy getting a normal chicks number, noooooo. Gotta get the girl who lives a state over who is home for the weekend... -_-

/flips table

I'm done!


Bad luck happens. Better luck next time.
Wojciech Zywny
Profile Joined April 2013
Poland271 Posts
April 24 2013 05:50 GMT
#2409
On April 24 2013 14:15 Spidinko wrote:
My girlfriend broke up with me after 4 years.. I don't know what to do.



prostitutes and blow man
Miecz przeznaczenia ma dwa ostrza. Jednym jesteś ty.
sunprince
Profile Joined January 2011
United States2258 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-24 05:55:04
April 24 2013 05:50 GMT
#2410
On April 24 2013 14:02 B.I.G. wrote:
Seriously the advice of changing who you are and what you like to get girls is like the worst advice I have ever heard. If you want to change you girl chase into some science then by all means, go to the PUA community and start doing whatever it is those sad fucks do to get laid.


Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

If who you are doesn't get you the results you want, then you're going to need to do something differently unless you're resigned to your fate.

On April 24 2013 14:02 B.I.G. wrote:
Maybe the "just be yourself thing" needs some explanation. It's not about being your own lazy self, but more like the best self you can be. Don't pretend to be something that is totally not you, but rather try to realize what your good qualities are and magnify them. Don't act like the smooth cool guy if your actually a very warm and open person.. Most of my close friends range from decent to really good with girls, and like none of them have the same "approach", and (almost) none of them try to pretend they are someone they're not.


The point isn't to pretend. It's to become a different person, a better person in terms of getting what you want.

If you're socially awkward, you're not trying to pretend otherwise. You're trying to become less socially awkward. This is changing yourself for the better, however you want to play semantics.
sunprince
Profile Joined January 2011
United States2258 Posts
April 24 2013 05:54 GMT
#2411
On April 24 2013 14:15 Spidinko wrote:
My girlfriend broke up with me after 4 years.. I don't know what to do.


Take the opportunity to better yourself (work on your education/career, hit the gym, etc.) and meet new girls.

When she regrets her decision and comes back to you, and you shoot her down in favor of the better girls who appreciate you, you'll know you've succeeded.
TomatoShark
Profile Joined August 2011
United States288 Posts
April 24 2013 06:05 GMT
#2412
8 more months and ill be a wizard :[
greenrose
Profile Joined April 2012
United States23 Posts
April 24 2013 06:19 GMT
#2413
almost masters. getting getting fit. yes, yes. it will all come together soon
doesn't matter how much you know, you'll always be a boot
TomatoShark
Profile Joined August 2011
United States288 Posts
April 24 2013 06:50 GMT
#2414
already in masters ;_; still on the path to be a wizard
kafkaesque
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
Germany2006 Posts
April 24 2013 06:54 GMT
#2415
On April 24 2013 15:50 TomatoShark wrote:
already in masters ;_; still on the path to be a wizard


Is that code for something?
| (• ◡•)|╯ ╰(❍ᴥ❍ʋ)
Liebig
Profile Joined August 2010
France738 Posts
April 24 2013 06:56 GMT
#2416
On April 24 2013 15:54 kafkaesque wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 24 2013 15:50 TomatoShark wrote:
already in masters ;_; still on the path to be a wizard


Is that code for something?

Wizard = virgin at 30 or something like that ._.
TomatoShark
Profile Joined August 2011
United States288 Posts
April 24 2013 06:57 GMT
#2417
http://www.vgmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/legend-on-the-internet-virgin-30-wizard.jpg
kafkaesque
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
Germany2006 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-24 07:12:38
April 24 2013 07:00 GMT
#2418
Fucking hell, virgin at 30? I'd have killed myself in the late teens, how do you stand it?

I mean, especially in summer there are so many stimuli that I find even a couple of weeks (or months, like in the current dry spell) unbearable.
| (• ◡•)|╯ ╰(❍ᴥ❍ʋ)
TomatoShark
Profile Joined August 2011
United States288 Posts
April 24 2013 07:09 GMT
#2419
I just suck at life :|
kafkaesque
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
Germany2006 Posts
April 24 2013 07:13 GMT
#2420
On April 24 2013 16:09 TomatoShark wrote:
I just suck at life :|


Don't worry, Hogwarts seems like a pretty nice place to be.
| (• ◡•)|╯ ╰(❍ᴥ❍ʋ)
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