EPTim 19 soon 20
Dating: How's your luck? - Page 12
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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Zoler
Sweden6339 Posts
im 19 soon 20 | ||
FabledIntegral
United States9232 Posts
My actual dating experience has been extremely mediocre lately. Dated one really quality girl for a bit, but it only lasted about a month and not really much of anything happened (I'm pretty sure she just simply lost interest, although we're still friends), and was regularly talking to one girl over the summer I was hooking up with on occasion who was anything but GF material (in short, she's also slept with 2 of my good friends, so yeah. She went through all 3 of us in one weekend in a drunken blur. At the very least, it's made a good story in between us, and is quite embarrassing from her since she had never had sex outside of a relationship prior to that weekend and only had 2 bf's before). | ||
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Gnax
Sweden490 Posts
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Alejandrisha
United States6566 Posts
On October 10 2011 09:17 FabledIntegral wrote: First dates are always the same for me, and everyone has went well. I always take them out to lunch/dinner and go ice skating. I used to play ice hockey, and I'm Canadian, and living in SoCal it's not something people here do often. It's not boring like a movie, it's active, and the girls are always worse than me so I can help them out (keep their balance and such) which provides a little bit of contact to feel out the mood, without also being creepy. My actual dating experience has been extremely mediocre lately. Dated one really quality girl for a bit, but it only lasted about a month and not really much of anything happened (I'm pretty sure she just simply lost interest, although we're still friends), and was regularly talking to one girl over the summer I was hooking up with on occasion who was anything but GF material (in short, she's also slept with 2 of my good friends, so yeah. She went through all 3 of us in one weekend in a drunken blur. At the very least, it's made a good story in between us, and is quite embarrassing from her since she had never had sex outside of a relationship prior to that weekend and only had 2 bf's before). i like your style ^^ me, i've had same gf for a long time since back in hs now long distance in college so no real input on dating from me haha | ||
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Ruffian
United States369 Posts
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REDBLUEGREEN
Germany1904 Posts
On October 10 2011 09:21 Gnax wrote: How does one date women nowadays? I hate clubs and I think internet dating is lame. /Forever alone Bars are better. Can buy her a beer and actually have a conversation without screaming, can play darts, table football or embarrass yourself at karaoke. If you wanna dance you can go to a club later or just dance in the bar. | ||
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FabledIntegral
United States9232 Posts
On October 10 2011 09:35 REDBLUEGREEN wrote: Bars are better. Can buy her a beer and actually have a conversation without screaming, can play darts, table football or embarrass yourself at karaoke. If you wanna dance you can go to a club later or just dance in the bar. All the bars people my age go to are almost equivalent to a club  . I don't know why, but I've always hated bars. Maybe it's just me, but it feels super awkward striking up a conversation unless they're hammered, and if they're hammered I have to be hammered as well, and then I'm more so looking to hookup, and I have a problem dating a girl who's just hooking up with random guys they've met. Although, at the same time, I met my first long-term gf at a club party, so I guess it still works. I didn't sleep with her though, in fact, only made out. But it only ended up happening because she contacted me afterwards via facebook (we go to the same college, so it wasn't creepy)... idk. I just dislike bars, a lot. Maybe I'm just awkward at them. | ||
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XenOmega
Canada2822 Posts
Before her and after her, nothing, except books, studies and work. Sad story? Well, here's more! Truth be told, I believe I'm not really good at social life. It takes me some time before feeling comfortable with a new group. It took me 1 year with the same guy (In my Master degree) before I started talking to the other students! I feel more comfortable chatting, texting, than speaking in a group. I have a very tiny group of friends (I think I have 4 real friends, and some more friends that I enjoy company), we have a strong friendship though. Not very open to new people, but not close-minded neither. Go out more, hang out? Cool idea, except for the fact that I'm not very good at socializing, like I said. Plus... I've always dedicated most of my time to my studies. Right now, I'm investing most my time on my Master thesis (Monday, Wednesday at the Library), university class (every Tuesday), work (Friday afternoon 3-11pm, Saturday and Sunday morning 7-3pm), Piano lessons and Hockey (every Thursday) and I'm working for two organization (for a newspaper/magazine for a non-profit organization ; and for Suicide Action Montreal, a non-profit organization that tries to help people who wants to commit suicide). So basically, I have very little time. I don't go to clubs, bars, parties... (I don't feel comfortable in large groups) And finally, I usually sleep late because me and my friends play games almost everyday from 11pm-1am (that's the only common time we have). Yea... So basically, I don't have much time, am shy, not very group-oriented guy... Not the kind of guy that can be very successful  BUT, there may be hope! There is one girl, one of my few friends (she is probably in my tiny group of my 4 best friends right now). We are hanging out once a week, or so. Mainly for academic purposes, to go eat, and me trying to give her 'life tips' (yea, I know its Paradoxical : the guy who has like zero 'life' tries to help other people ^^). I see her mainly as a friend, one of my few must I insist. Since I've known her (1 year), she had 3 or 4 different boyfriend (lost count). Everytime, it ended in a catastrophe and she would come to me seeking help. Right now, she's single and we've been seeing each other more and more. I'm not sure though if she feels anything for me. I'm not even sure if I feel anything for her neither (I believe I do). Don't get me wrong neither, we are seeing more and more because she has her problems, and I try to help her. Yes, we do go to dinner, or cinema, but our main discussions are about life, her ex-boyfriends, school, her papers... Right now, I'm helping her do her mid-terms papers. I don't recall being with her for 'no reason', just to hang out if you will. So why not give it a try? What I am scared of, though, is that she is one of my only friends. I don't want to lose a friend (failed relation, or her saying that she's not interested). Plus, I've always seen our relation as me (the 'master) and her the 'pupil'. We met randomly on the internet (she was looking for help after breaking with his boyfriend). I gave her as much help as I could, and we somehow kept contact after she managed to go through that failed relation. Since then, we've been seeing each every week. Plus, it feels very awkward for me to have any feelings for her, other than friendship. I'm soon to be a teacher (not sure if that's what I want, but that's what I'm going to do). And what I feel for her seems like me falling in 'love' with one of my future student. Feels wrong, isn't it? Oh, and to complicate things more... I'm a bad loser. I hate losing. There's nothing I fear more than a defeat, a refusal. Often, I'd rather not try something, than to try something and fail at it. I often believed this was the reason why I never were into any relation, or why my life was 'so simple'. I believe I am a happy man, with my ups and downs. But I take refusal very badly (lately, I was refused a promotion and last year I was refused in Law) and I was down for some very long time... I always seem to abide by this idea : flee the uncertain. In other words : See that girl I like? Well, I will never ask her out, never. Why? Well, I don't want to get hurt by a refusal. So why do I want to a GF? Well, I don't want to die single, I guess. Not sure if I want a family, though. Should I ever want a family, it has to start somewhere, right? And maybe the fact that I'm a guy. So, here I am, asking the help of this community ^^ Any ideas, comments, tips? Is my story the same as everyone else? And before the trolls come : Yea, I know, its a cool story, bro. | ||
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APurpleCow
United States1372 Posts
Maybe it's just me, but it feels super awkward striking up a conversation unless they're hammered, and if they're hammered I have to be hammered as well, and then I'm more so looking to hookup, and I have a problem dating a girl who's just hooking up with random guys they've met. Says the guy about the random girl he just met who he's hooking up with >__> | ||
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3FFA
United States3931 Posts
Threesome agreed! Probe can watch and if anyone wants to be a commentator be our guest! | ||
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FabledIntegral
United States9232 Posts
On October 10 2011 10:25 APurpleCow wrote: Says the guy about the random girl he just met who he's hooking up with >__> I'm not hooking up with her anymore. I haven't done anything in with any girl in like 2 months ... . And we're talking about dating . I never dated her. And I was hammered when we hooked up haha. So was she. | ||
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Sm3agol
United States2055 Posts
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evanthebouncy!
United States12796 Posts
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FabledIntegral
United States9232 Posts
On October 10 2011 10:55 evanthebouncy! wrote: thx guys I feel better now. Still recovering from a break up. Haha I know the feeling. I've felt awful lately about girls, having little substantial talk beyond friend zone with any for the last few months... while both my roommates have their GF's over all the time... it's nice to know I'm not the only one alone, even if it feels like it and I haven't met anyone new . Met a cute girl the other night, but she has a bf. And I hate being the one to break that stuff up, only because then I feel like if that's possible, she would break up with me for another guy sooner or later. | ||
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xDaunt
United States17988 Posts
On October 10 2011 10:41 Sm3agol wrote: Been on...like.....4 dates in my entire 26 year life. All but one was super painfully awkward. Never been in any kind of serious relationship, and tbh, I've kind of given up. Just a kind of FML moment for me right now. I have a decent job, nice car, house, play several musical instruments with a fair degree of proficiency, and try my best to be a decent person, but the only females that ever have displayed the slightest bit of interest to me are either way overweight and super needy or about 10(or more) years older than me. I am cougar bait, but noone my age wants anything remotely to do with me. Maybe I'm boring...I dunno. There is one girl I've gotten to know though, and I'm probably going to ask her out sometime, she's really nice, and is an amazing cellist.....a kind of last ditch effort on my part. You're right at that age where girls start getting smarter. It generally takes until they're 25 or so for them to get their priorities straight and figure out what they want. Dating should get easier for you soon. | ||
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DoubleZee
Canada556 Posts
A few months after that I met my current ex. We went out for 3 years with very few problems, until she decided to dump me. One year later and I'm still not completely over it. I haven't had any interest in dating since. Plus I lost 2 jobs int he past year, and lets face it, no girl worth a damn wants to date an unemployed 23 y/o guy living with his parents. Forever alone. | ||
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Varpulis
United States2517 Posts
If i had any free time in my schedule, i'd try to get back into the game, but alas, freshman at my school have the most jam-packed schedules. It also doesn't help that my dorm is 10 minutes off campus TT | ||
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Deadlyhazard
United States1177 Posts
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FliedLice
Germany7494 Posts
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Trict
Canada182 Posts
Second gf went way better though, year and a half but she had to move back home to help out her family mutual break up with hope to getting back together in the future. Third and last at the moment was kinda a one night standish? Talking with this girl and it got heated and we met but the girl is clearly not well in the head so I let her go nicely (reminded me to much of first gf) all and all lessons learned and basically sticking to the 2nd gf and hoping to make things work there. | ||
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