D Ranks Individual Tournament 7 Signup - Page 8

On October 22 2013 12:59 ninazerg wrote:


No.

His play is absolutely flawed in every single way imaginable, and that's why I made a point to smash him 10-0 on iccup using ridiculous strategies. That's why he's gone into Bin-Laden-Hiding status to dodge playing me in a grudgematch, because I would obliterate every fiber of his being and win 51-0 in a bo99. We played some silly showmatches with offraces and weird maps, and he barely won and decided that to brag about that 24/7, probably because it's the only time he's ever won a game in his time playing BroodWar, and I was happy to give him something to be happy about, but he had to take it too far and insult the true champion and coach of iFU, NinaZerg. This guy couldn't get to D+ if his life depended on it, so there was ever some weird Saw-scenario where he had to get D+ or die, he would definitely die first in the movie.

Why not just rematch? We did. 10-0, whisper for reps. I gave him an opportunity to prove his claim that he is even mildly competent at BroodWar, and he decided to run and hide like a cat from a vacuum cleaner. The offer, of course, is still on the table, but I guess he'd much rather play in DRIT now that the people who can barely hit C- are out, and he said "We can play bo9 on dota2". Dota2? Serious? I would play mobas, but I have a brain, so it would be very difficult for such a game to keep my interest long enough for me to learn all the geekazoid magic wizard spells that they use in LOTR or Star Trek or some shit. So while he was collecting Yu-Gi-Oh cards so he could play Magic The Gathering with his wizard-cloak on, I was busy playing a real game: BroodWar.

Seriously, here's what will happen:

He will go double gateways in PvP to win with zealots and not build enough probes. Despite his lack of probes, his money will go up to 800 minerals, and he will make a forge. You could probably win with 1-base carrier in PvP, just be sure to go 2 gate zealots and hold that ramp. If he doesn't go 2 gate, just kill him. He can't micro and stop your zealots. In my estimation, he will probably try to use cannons to break your ramp. Too bad you have dragoons though. He will then "transition" into DTs, and once that fails, he will break out in hives. gg

On October 23 2013 13:50 SynC[gm] wrote:
okay guise, lets not just make this thread into a "lets bash Eywa" thread. Gotta keep it DRIT-related!

On October 23 2013 20:01 puppykiller wrote:
Damn L-master went nazi on you guys. It was pretty overdue but I still didn't see it coming. Props.

On October 24 2013 16:16 ninazerg wrote:


I disagree with your assessment that Eywa has reached C-. If he can buy Sziky's soul for 400 dollars, getting someone to get an account of his to C- for 20 bucks doesn't seem like that much of a stretch. Realistically, if Eywa had reached C-, it would only be because we've warped spacetime and have teleported to a similar parallel universe where Tupac is dead (he's alive) and Herman Cain is the President of the United States, because in our current universe, C- for Eywa would trigger a chain reaction that would destroy all of the matter in existence, effectively obliterating the universe. Since this has not happened yet, I think we can safely assume that Eywa is still around D-/E level, and we should start an ERIT or ERTL for him to compete in, because I am convinced that he periodically gets up from his computer to smear feces on his walls during games, which is why his macro is non-existent and the Webster Dictionary has defined the antonym to "micro" as "Eywa". Day[9] once burst into laughter in one of his dailies recalling a joke where his friend was explaining to a girlfriend what micro was, and said "In this hand I have eywa" and opened his hand to reveal a Yu-Gi-Oh card with Eywa's zero stats, and then he opened the other hand, and there was nothing in it, and she was like "There's nothing there." and he was like "STILL BETTER MICRO THAN WHAT EYWA HAS."

Edit: Not that I want to see Eywa play. I want Qikz to take the place of Eywa, because I want to see an actual game of StarCraft.

On October 24 2013 16:16 ninazerg wrote:


I disagree with your assessment that Eywa has reached C-. If he can buy Sziky's soul for 400 dollars, getting someone to get an account of his to C- for 20 bucks doesn't seem like that much of a stretch. Realistically, if Eywa had reached C-, it would only be because we've warped spacetime and have teleported to a similar parallel universe where Tupac is dead (he's alive) and Herman Cain is the President of the United States, because in our current universe, C- for Eywa would trigger a chain reaction that would destroy all of the matter in existence, effectively obliterating the universe. Since this has not happened yet, I think we can safely assume that Eywa is still around D-/E level, and we should start an ERIT or ERTL for him to compete in, because I am convinced that he periodically gets up from his computer to smear feces on his walls during games, which is why his macro is non-existent and the Webster Dictionary has defined the antonym to "micro" as "Eywa". Day[9] once burst into laughter in one of his dailies recalling a joke where his friend was explaining to a girlfriend what micro was, and said "In this hand I have eywa" and opened his hand to reveal a Yu-Gi-Oh card with Eywa's zero stats, and then he opened the other hand, and there was nothing in it, and she was like "There's nothing there." and he was like "STILL BETTER MICRO THAN WHAT EYWA HAS."

Edit: Not that I want to see Eywa play. I want Qikz to take the place of Eywa, because I want to see an actual game of StarCraft.