Apathy has taken a hold. I'm spiraling in that awkward point in life where one cannot decide to do professionally. I've served for 5 years, done construction for 2, and for lack of a better choice, I've decided to go into some kind of apprenticeship. I've taken a few steps toward it but I'm holding back. How do you choose something so important like this? I'm fucking 24 and although I know I'm young, there are people who are fucking 19 and they are 2 years through a degree and have their life laid out.
Don't get me wrong, I would never enjoy laying out the rest of my life, but why for fucks sake can I not choose a direction and GO! Wasting time doing menial bullshit. Serving is pretty good money at times but it accomplishes NOTHING and I assumed this would be my last summer doing it. SUPPLES! You're fired. Apparently I had become so apathetic, even my boss and coworkers had noticed. My customers always left happy with the service but I still managed to piss off the management. I need to find a direction, and I was wondering how the lovely people of TL found theirs?
I'm just going to enter college, so I don't know much about this, but have you considering going to a trade school? There have been threads like yours before with people in similar situations, and thats what many people recommended.
If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
Do you qualify for the GI bill for college? If so why not give college a go? Whether its community college or a four year college it does not hurt to take a bunch of classes and see if it sparks any interest. You never know and it shouldn't hurt you as you currently seem clueless about what you want to do in life. Dont let your age deter you from college. With a college degree required for many jobs nowadays, you should consider attending. College will take time and effort but it can allow you to explore many subjects and see if any of it is for you. Good luck.
If anyone knew the answer to the question "how am I supposed to know what I should do with my life?" or "I have so many interests, I dont know what to choose. pls help!"..fuck man. Billionaire.
No one can tell you what you should do. It's your own fucking life and most of us had the same problem. If you don' start talking to people about what they do for a living and why, visit classes in college or just fucking read a book about what MIGHT interest you then I don' really know what kind of advice you expect? Someone saying "dude, artificial intelligence man. Go find out where you can study this, it's teh shit!" ?
Seriously, you need to get up your ass and fight it out for yourself. A good friend of mine is in the same situation and it pains me to see someone like him, smart, funny and without a doubt a serious benefit for any company wasting his time in some grocery store (he is 25 by now).
Just get your shit together man. You don't need us telling you that this is okay, normal and whatever. You are obviously looking for motivation. Get a girlfriend, have someone you would want to impress, have a baby, etc, just have someone that you will be willing to work hard for.
The reality is that few people get into a career that they love. The idea that there is a perfect job for everyone is bullshit. Sometimes you just have to tough it out, either go back to school or get another menial job.
Perhaps you could visit a job fair and just talk with people from all sorts of branches. Hopefully you'll find something that sparks your interest/enthusiasm and you can either start and work your way up through on the job learning and some courses or you can enroll somewhere to work towards your new found goal.
When I started working I also didn't have a clue. I just started somewhere that seemed ok (didn't have a degree so the pay was not stellar but a good working mind and a will to make something of it) and gradually took on new tasks and climbing the ladder. Took me a few years before I was running the department and moved on for a new challenge.
In short: - pick something you think you could like - pick something with growth perspective - if you have the time do some courses on the side - if you don't like it go search for something new but don't stay to short on several consecutive jobs as it will look bad on your CV.
That's the best I can do without sending you to college where you probably will change your major 3 times anyway. I think perhaps 30% of my high school class stayed with it's first major and of them perhaps 30% actually took a job somewhat related to that major.
don't feel bad. I'm 29 and I haven't my life laid out for me. I finished my studies when I was 28 (that must be hard to believe for an American) and those studies don't even qualify me for a job since my major was comparative literature. Now I'm making money as a substitute teacher. If everything works out I'll get a permanent job at a school, but if it doesn't I'll have to start from scratch. Have faith, I have.
From personal experience, I can tell you that working shitty, menial jobs is really helpful in finding out stuff about oneself. After (high)school, I started working various low-paid jobs like construction and service work.. it went on until I was 24 or something, when I realised how much I loathed this type of work, and it helped me get back to studying.
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
In the end it comes down to confidence , the lack of.I think it's safe to say a fair chunk of people on these forums suffer from it.
Even so , having some dead end job is better than having no job , nothing sucks the life out of you more than being unemployed.
The sad thing is some people don't get the basics.One of my buddies on West did some computing degree and has been unemployed since he finished his studies about 9 months back.He sent in his resume to IBM and they gave him a call back , but he told them to call him back as he was eating his dinner.They didn't call him back.Some people are idiots i swear , be presentable and have a well laid out resume with no spelling errors and no stupid email addresses and you are ahead of 70% of the people out there nowdays.
First I'd like to express my sympathies. This is a very hard state to be in. Unfortunately everyone is different and what works on some may not work for you. Furthermore, the strange and standardized world we live in really punishes creativity and innovation outside of the already established life styles (could I make a living selling my philosophical ideas at 50 bucks a pop?). If it makes you feel better, this feeling that you're struggling with is extremely common.
When I was young, I was really really high on life, and as a result I had no ambition (it's my belief that those who are happy and satisfied lack ambition). I had no job and I dropped out of high school, etc etc. Finally, when the mediocrity of this horrible existence we all share began bearing down on me, I decided a job was in order. Shitty jobs abound, I experimented. When I began with more serious jobs that required investment, I figured out that I'm capable of great preparation. Because most non-degree jobs are boring (or rare) I decided school was the best option.
So here are a few things. Experiment with jobs you might be interested in. If you don't like any of these, go to school and focus only on classes that you may like. My first semester, for example, I took biology because it sounded interesting to me. That's all it took for me to 'plan out' my future and begin earning a degree in biology.
Or, if that's just more of the same, hopefully this next comment isn't offensive and instead helpful. Life isn't meaningful. You live. You die. The end never occurs because nothing worth note ever started on this small and distant planet. If you never find a dream job, that's okay. For many people, I think it's find to find something that you're okay with. For example, one of the jobs I had before I went to school was an electrician's apprentice. I found that that job wasn't intelligent enough for me, but that it would have worked fine if I was a journeyman or something.
The reality is that few people get into a career that they love.
too true as is the idea that you can 'be anything you want to be' - 95% of those kids doing TV and media classes never get a related job at the end of them ; what a tragedy!
Think carefully before you choose your courses , choose something in high demand.
I never could figure out what I would love to do for a job, so I just stopped thinking about it. I instead focused on the rest of my life. I made my primary goal being happy and not letting anything compromise that goal. I guess it wasn't so much that I found my direction. I think I focused on the part of my life where I had a direction.
I am going on my 12th year of being in the work force, doing 3 completely different types of jobs over that course. The people I have met at work have made an impact on my life but the jobs themselves haven't really defined my life. They are just means to provide for my needs.
That was to answer your question, I think you got some good advice in the rest of the thread. I will just reinforce that you have to figure it out for yourself, and you will. Just try to keep your spirits up while you do
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
This is incredibly true. I'm always jealous of people having something better than me, whether it's a better social life or just happier in general. Remember, these people are probably jealous of you for something too. In the end, it all balances out.
As for the job, just pick something you might like and go with it. Don't feel like you have to pick something. It's alot easier to decide you hate your job when you're 25 than when you're 30 and about to get married. And even at 30, it's much easier to change your job than when you're 40 and the kids are depending on you for food.
On June 26 2010 16:11 EvilTeletubby wrote: If it makes you feel any better... you're in the same boat as 90% of us.
Hell, I'm 26 and have no clue what I really really want to do. I used to envy my friends that went to college (I did for 1 year then dropped out) for having it all 'figured out' until they graduated; most of THEM had no clue what they wanted to do, and many took on basic jobs that had nothing to do with their major (essentially starting their working lives 4 years after me). Even the ones that did stick with it, and are working in their field doing what they want to do, don't necessarily have it all laid out. One of my best friends, who went through YEARS of civil engineering and is currently working in that field, with a good paying job, has his own home already....... is still a virgin and insanely insanely lonely/socially repressed.
tl;dr - Everyone is envious of everyone else, one way or another. Focus on yourself; even if you don't know what you want to do. Worrying about other people will accomplish nothing but make you more depressed.
I wonder how many TLers are college dropouts!
I want to go back to college but I will do it entirely differently. The number one priority in my life is to FIND my number one priority in life. Many people get lured into the false sense of comfort of a `secure reliable job` but that shit is soul draining. I really don`t want to be 40 years old and ask myself, `damn, what could I have done instead of this bullshit?" There are a few people out there who when they go to work are bubbling with joy. I wanna find that something that brings out that sense of unbridled happiness and childlike wonder in me. When I go back to school it will be more to explore what I REALLY to do in this life rather than to simply do courses. Like I will actively go around and probe all my professors for answers, volunteer at different labs, do undergraduate research, ask my counsellor for help, co-op opportunities and so on and so forth.
Other than that, you also just need to rack up as many life lessons as you can to get a better understanding of who you are and what you want. You just need to actively seek novelty and challenge, every single day.
Also, look for people who are passionate and are in love with their jobs. Ask them why. Figure out what makes them tick. Try to put yourself in their shoes and see if you have a strong emotion response mentally doing what they do. Then research it, try it out.
This is the "plight" of our generation. It is the quarter life crisis.
Yeah, all I ever think about is that I know I need to go back to college, problem is I have NO CLUE what I'd want to go for. That's the reason I dropped out in the first place... not lack of funds, my grades were fine, I was motivated ok; I just didn't care at all for what I was there for.
I had always thought to myself "I'll spend a couple years working and figure out what I really want to do", but in all honesty, that hasn't happened yet. Actually, I fear I may never figure out what I want to do in life, or I may figure it out really late in the game.
EPT
