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Scenario: Guy & Girl have been together for a long while (year +).
GUY: Guy decides to break her off softly, Genuinely wants to be friends because he still likes the girl a lot as a friend/person. Just doesn't see them as being life partners, not in love, and has some other dislikes for her as a GF( but not as a friend). So the guy wants to stay pretty close friends (like best friends). PS- guy lets girl hook up with other chicks and is not possesive (lets her go to parties, doesn't check up on her etc).
Girl: Girl Loves the guy a lot and will do almost anything for him, and if she can't be exclusive wants nothing to do with him at all. Either bf/gf or blocked number basically. Girl hooks up with other chicks but won't bring any home because of jealousy or something.
I'm sure I left out some details or it's in need of some clarity on how the girl stands. So ask me anything else that will help your decision if you need to.
POLL:
Poll: Who's more selfish? (Vote): Girl (Vote): Guy
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I just dont get it srry...
T_T
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girl is easily more selfish because of the lower IQ they posess
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On May 17 2009 09:36 MaGic~PhiL wrote: I just dont get it srry...
T_T
basically, is guy selfish because he wants to 'keep' (key word here) her around. or is the girl more selfish because she doesn't care about the guy at all once they aren't together (IE only cares about herself).
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i'd say the girl is definitely more selfish. Why is the guy selfish for deciding to not be in a relationship? If he stayed with her just for her sake that would be much worse imo
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now that I voted, it's time to read!
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On May 17 2009 09:49 anderoo wrote: i'd say the girl is definitely more selfish. Why is the guy selfish for deciding to not be in a relationship? If he stayed with her just for her sake that would be much worse imo but the guy is getting a steady stream of sex, company, and anything he wants. Which is somewhat selfish right?
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I think that the way the OP is phrased introduces bias. Consider that the Guy character inherently doesn't want as close of a relationship with the Girl character as he currently maintains, yet also inherently wants to maintain a more-distant form of the same relationship. Conversely, consider that the Girl character inherently wants to be in a close relationship with the Guy, and inherently would want to break off the connection rather than maintain the more-distant form of the relationship. Seeing as the two characters want different things, on this basis alone, why would the Guy's desired outcome be weighted more heavily than the Girl's?
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What does being selfish have to do in this scenario? Sometimes when couples break up, one of them cannot be friends. If she truly did love him as much as she did, being friends would only make it significantly harder for her to get over him and move on. If anything, the guy should respect that and hopefully in a few months, when enough time goes by and wounds heal, the two can be friends again.
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guy doesnt love girl, shouldnt force himself too
i voted girl
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well you pretty much said the guy is cool and the girl is a pain in the ass. I guess it's just normal, the one being 'kicked' is going to get mad. It'd be the same if it was the other way around.
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I don't think it's selfishness if you don't want to be with someone. I mean, most of the times unrequited love is pretty awkward. If the girl doesn't want to be around the guy if they're not dating, it's her choice. It's not really a selfish decision to not to be with someone. It's also not selfish. Now, if the girl is using it as a tactic to force the guy to stay, then yes that is selfish. So I suppose it all comes down to intent. Same for the guy, it's not selfish to want to keep someone around. I've had relationships that ended up as friends, and I can understand the feeling. It's only selfish if you know the person has decided that she/he doesn't want to be around you, yet you demand it. If you're satisfying your own needs while causing discomfort to the other person, that's a selfish thing to do. Even if the guy loves the girl, sometimes you just have to give them space and hope it works out.
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Yea I think the girl's position on the all or nothing is a gambit/tactic on keeping the relationship. Whether its a bluff or serious is another issue.
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Wow, this poll is goign to be so biased. If this isn't response bias I fail at statistics
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Neither of them are being selfish as long as they are totally honest with each other about what they want. People dont always have the same ideals or views, thats just life.
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Definitely girl... I don't really see how the guy is being selfish.
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On May 17 2009 10:11 JeeJee wrote: so, she's bi? most woman experiment at the very least.
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