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BackHo
New Zealand400 Posts
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Raithed
China7078 Posts
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Oedi
Canada265 Posts
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Railxp
Hong Kong1313 Posts
and although it is difficult to deal with, people who suffer from any sort of disorder/sickness still appreciate it a lot when you stick it through the tough times with them. | ||
cunninglinguists
United States925 Posts
perhaps you could try explaining the situation to her. sit her down and have a serious discussion with her about her condition and explain to her your frustration. from the way you described her, she seems like someone who'd understand. hope that helps. good luck! | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
You do what you want. If you don't want to deal with her, don't. But whatever hardship you endure, it will be nothing compared to what people of this condition feel. | ||
Grobyc
Canada18410 Posts
On April 20 2009 15:09 Raithed wrote: youre her friend, i think you could/should guide her. is she an attention whore? like you gotta confront her about that. This is horrible advice, don't confront her. I have a friend that is bipolar(99% sure, but he's never told me personally) as well. You don't want to get in their face about it if you know they don't want to talk about it or anything. My friend has basically attempted to commit suicide twice because one of our mutual friends got in a bit of an argument and things didn't go his way. You just have to figure out what triggers their sudden mood changes and try to avoid it. My friend gets really upset when the both of us go to a party when one of our friends who he used to date is there because he gets jealous and shit like that and shit hits the fan. You just have to be overly supportive sometimes, but either way Chef is right about dealing with them or not. You have to choose between a) dealing with them, and getting used to putting more than average effort into a friendship, or b) not choose to deal with them. Be careful if you choose b though, I have a feeling horrible things would happen if I stopped dealing with my friend, we are basically best friends as it is right now. | ||
paper
13196 Posts
On April 20 2009 15:09 Raithed wrote: youre her friend, i think you could/should guide her. is she an attention whore? like you gotta confront her about that. lol. | ||
ibutoss
Australia341 Posts
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Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
but obviously she would need to trust you and it would require a certain amount of finesse. | ||
Railxp
Hong Kong1313 Posts
Edit: just a thought, but she might benefit from watching it too? | ||
Railz
United States1449 Posts
On April 20 2009 15:09 Raithed wrote: youre her friend, i think you could/should guide her. is she an attention whore? like you gotta confront her about that. You must not know much about Bi-polar disorder. Confronting them, even on a high still can be used by remembered by them on a low which can lead to some pretty horrific actions. | ||
Raithed
China7078 Posts
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Kerotan
England2109 Posts
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Frits
11782 Posts
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PH
United States6173 Posts
Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. | ||
BackHo
New Zealand400 Posts
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Kennelie
United States2296 Posts
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Raithed
China7078 Posts
On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? | ||
QuanticHawk
United States32054 Posts
On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: Show nested quote + On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Man, I knew you were an idiot, but lol | ||
iNcontroL
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USA29055 Posts
wait nm FUCK THIS THREAD | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
On April 20 2009 15:54 ibutoss wrote: Well good for you if you can stick it out and support your friend. I just can't do it. Depressed people are so draining and they just suck the life out of everything around them. Maybe, but they also tend to have some excellent artistic abilities. They're not valueless leeches. Well... I only say that based on knowing that many talented actors and artists have mental disorders... It may not always work both ways... | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 00:47 Hawk wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Man, I knew you were an idiot, but lol you shouldn't act like that regardless of how confident you are that you're right. I agree completely with raith, and if anything I am a little bi-polar myself. so don't be a dick. Raithed don't be upset that a lot of people here don't understand what you are saying. It is common. | ||
QuanticHawk
United States32054 Posts
He's an idiot, and that's completely wrong. | ||
PH
United States6173 Posts
On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: Show nested quote + On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Of course within the realm of all remote possibilities in the universe, yes you could. But that's like asking a kleptomaniac to not packrat and steal, or like asking an OCD to not do his rituals. Actually, bipolar is probably more difficult to control than kleptomania and OCD. There is a reason why it is a diagnosed disorder...and that is because it's not simply an up and down of moods...it's severe enough that it warrants the attention of shrinks and psychologists (I know that's somewhat circular, but...). It can have severely damaging effects on a person's life, and simply brushing it off like that isn't fair to the person and the people around them. Yes, we are all "a little bipolar"...however, most of us don't have a bipolar disorder. EDIT On April 21 2009 03:38 travis wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 00:47 Hawk wrote: On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Man, I knew you were an idiot, but lol you shouldn't act like that regardless of how confident you are that you're right. I agree completely with raith, and if anything I am a little bi-polar myself. so don't be a dick. Raithed don't be upset that a lot of people here don't understand what you are saying. It is common. It's pretty clear what he's saying, and I still don't think he's any more right. There's a clear difference between you and someone with a bipolar disorder...it doesn't mess with your overall lifestyle like it does theirs. If it's not severe enough to warrant some kind of professional attention, then it's not relevant here. I'm not pushing for the complete foil of what you're saying...I don't think the OP's friend should be babied or anything like that, but expecting such as you and Raith are simply isn't going to happen. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 07:44 Hawk wrote: Are you kidding me lol He's an idiot, and that's completely wrong. Bi-Polar is a mood disorder. It is the same as being very very moody. Even very very moody people can learn to sit still and be quiet. Even very very moody people can learn to recognize their own mood swings, and understand that when their mood is changing they ought to slow down and be more careful about their decision-making. If you disagree with this, then why? | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 07:44 PH wrote: There's a clear difference between you and someone with a bipolar disorder...it doesn't mess with your overall lifestyle like it does theirs. If it's not severe enough to warrant some kind of professional attention, then it's not relevant here. Bi-polar is just a term for a group of symptoms. Let me tell you that I am completely sure I have had to deal with those symptoms for most of my life, and I have struggled against them. Sure, it may not be the exact same or as extreme as it is for others, but I don't see how that is relevant. It's all relative in the first place. What do you think people with these problems did before there was awareness of it? They just dealt with it. Surely people with bi-polar have the same capabilities for self improvement as the rest of us. | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
Without drug assistance, some mental disorders are literally impossible to control, especially when the disorder very much has to do with self control. Ask a depressed person to stop being depressed. What goes thru their head is all the pessimism that the disorder causes in the first place "I can't," "It's impossible," "It's hopeless." Similarly, tell someone with bi-polar on their upswing to stop trying to do so much and they'll tell you "Why? Being actives not a bad thing!" "I'm happy, why should I stop?" If they could just control their mood, like a non-afflicted person... Then they wouldn't be classified as having the disorder in the first place. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 08:04 Chef wrote: I'm no neurologist, but I'm guessing that the chemicals in the brain of the person who has this disorder will be preventing them from 'just slowing down.' It's not a conscious decision what chemicals your brain is moving. It is the same chemicals as anyone else when they have the same types of mood swings. The reason they are diagnosed with bi-polar is that the swings are common enough and intense enough that they or others determined that they need help. I absolutely agree that you do not control what you feel. But you do control how you react to those feelings. I am not saying that is easy, it is learned and developed over time(unless you are lucky enough to naturally be mindful enough to do it). It'd be like saying 'yeah, if you just think really hard, you'll be able to slow or speed up your heart rate at will.' well actually that is also possible to learn Without drug assistance, some mental disorders are literally impossible to control, especially when the disorder very much has to do with self control. I don't think this disorder has anything to do with self control. Ask a depressed person to stop being depressed. What goes thru their head is all the pessimism that the disorder causes in the first place "I can't," "It's impossible," "It's hopeless." Similarly, tell someone with bi-polar on their upswing to stop trying to do so much and they'll tell you "Why? Being actives not a bad thing!" "I'm happy, why should I stop?" It's what they call a 'vicious cycle' ![]() I am not saying that the "disorder" is self-curable, because I don't think I can convince people of that. What I am saying is that regardless of how you feel - whether it be pain pleasure sadness etc etc - it is fully possible to learn to control your actions. | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
well actually that is also possible to learn It's not. You can physically slow down your breathing, and stop moving, but you can't just tell your heart to slow down. Unless you have an example of someone who is able to breathe quickly or at least normally, while slowing down their heart rate, I don't believe it. I am not saying that the "disorder" is self-curable, because I don't think I can convince people of that. What I am saying is that regardless of how you feel - whether it be pain pleasure sadness etc etc - it is fully possible to learn to control your actions. Okay, I misunderstood. Sure, if someone is sad, they can choose to put on an non-genuine smile so others don't worry, but it doesn't really fix how they feel. Someone who is extremely angry and in a rage can not punch a hole in their wall, but it doesn't change that their internal dialogue is going crazy. I don't really understand why you bring it up. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
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Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 08:16 Chef wrote: It's not. You can physically slow down your breathing, and stop moving, but you can't just tell your heart to slow down. Unless you have an example of someone who is able to breathe quickly or at least normally, while slowing down their heart rate, I don't believe it. well it is fine if you are skeptical of what I am saying but as human beings we do have internal senses, internal awareness, and we do have influence and control over all the parts of our body if we train for it. Okay, I misunderstood. Sure, if someone is sad, they can choose to put on an non-genuine smile so others don't worry, but it doesn't really fix how they feel. Someone who is extremely angry and in a rage can not punch a hole in their wall, but it doesn't change that their internal dialogue is going crazy. I don't really understand why you bring it up. because none of us should be living for self gratification. we need to think about how our actions affect others, and behave accordingly. punching that hole in the wall does not change how they feel, it only creates a hole in the wall. | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
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PH
United States6173 Posts
On April 21 2009 07:52 travis wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 07:44 Hawk wrote: Are you kidding me lol He's an idiot, and that's completely wrong. Bi-Polar is a mood disorder. It is the same as being very very moody. Even very very moody people can learn to sit still and be quiet. Even very very moody people can learn to recognize their own mood swings, and understand that when their mood is changing they ought to slow down and be more careful about their decision-making. If you disagree with this, then why? Sure, that's one way to look at it...but equating bipolar to being "very very moody" is potentially an unfair gloss. If that's the case, then it'd be safe to say I, and many people I know (who don't) have bipolar, then. That's a very bad gloss. And once again...sure, one could work against it, but expecting too much from just that is simply not fair. On April 21 2009 07:56 travis wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 07:44 PH wrote: There's a clear difference between you and someone with a bipolar disorder...it doesn't mess with your overall lifestyle like it does theirs. If it's not severe enough to warrant some kind of professional attention, then it's not relevant here. Bi-polar is just a term for a group of symptoms. Let me tell you that I am completely sure I have had to deal with those symptoms for most of my life, and I have struggled against them. Sure, it may not be the exact same or as extreme as it is for others, but I don't see how that is relevant. It's all relative in the first place. What do you think people with these problems did before there was awareness of it? They just dealt with it. Surely people with bi-polar have the same capabilities for self improvement as the rest of us. Then let me tell you that I have as well. Of course mine aren't as severe as someone who is diagnosed with a bipolar disorder, but it has negatively affected various aspects of my life more or less severely in the past. In fact, I know many people who have suffered through and suffer through such symptoms...and it's negatively affected various aspects of their lives more or less severely in the past as well. None of that is relevant at all. It's not up to you to decide what severity of symptoms warrants a "disorder" diagnosis. That's up to professionals much more knowledgeable than you or I. There are many people who never get diagnosed for bipolar disorder even when such professional help could help them. Sure, some of them may end up eventually be able to improve their conditions, but I am also sure that the vast majority of them don't. Even people who are diagnosed and do receive help/treatment/whatever often don't find their way out of it. (I know somebody is going bring up about how getting a diagnosis for such a problem may hinder their progress towards finding their way out of it, but I'm not going to go out of my way to talk about that) | ||
QuanticHawk
United States32054 Posts
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ahrara_
Afghanistan1715 Posts
On April 21 2009 08:41 Hawk wrote: Oh man, the amount of stupid bullshit in this thread is incredible. Where's frits? I find myself agreeing with Hawk for once. Travis, why do you think you are better qualified to insist on something with which you clearly don't have as much experience with as the people you're arguing against? The impact of mental illness isn't something anyone can make you appreciate over the internet. Unless you have some kind of disorder or yourself or you've spent time with people who have some kind of disorder, you really CANNOT speak on their behalf. For once can you just accept that other people may be right about something and that you are really, really, really wrong?! | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
On April 21 2009 08:41 Hawk wrote: Oh man, the amount of stupid bullshit in this thread is incredible. Where's frits? Oh common. I may not be a psych MAJOR, but I have taken psych courses and know just as much as him ![]() | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 08:59 ahrara_ wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 08:41 Hawk wrote: Oh man, the amount of stupid bullshit in this thread is incredible. Where's frits? I find myself agreeing with Hawk for once. Travis, why do you think you are better qualified to insist on something with which you clearly don't have as much experience with as the people you're arguing against? The impact of mental illness isn't something anyone can make you appreciate over the internet. Because what I have been arguing since I joined this thread is universal to all humans. It doesn't matter what disorder they have. What is it you think I am claiming, why do you not dispute it directly or just announce that you disagree, rather than trying to undermine my points by saying I have a lack of experience(which really you have no clue how much experience with bi-polar I do or do not have). Unless you have some kind of disorder or yourself or you've spent time with people who have some kind of disorder, you really CANNOT speak on their behalf. For once can you just accept that other people may be right about something and that you are really, really, really wrong?! I have no problem admitting when I am wrong, if I realize it. The reason I am always in disputes with others here is that I am very confident and have no qualms about telling others that they are wrong. And I am very confident because I pick and choose my battles. If I don't have a clue wtf I am talking about I do not join in the debate. I do have a "disorder", adhd. Or maybe it's bi-polar. I experience symptoms from both. But it has nothing to do with it. Please don't lose track of what I was saying in the first place - which is the only point I have been making in this thread from the start. it could be good to point out to her certain types of behavior she illustrates if she seems unaware. she may not be able to control how she feels but she can control what she does, even if it is hard. but obviously she would need to trust you and it would require a certain amount of finesse. I am well aware that I come off as pretentious and stubborn to many people here. I wish it wasn't like that, it really isn't the type of person I am. But we can't all understand each other that easy, because many of us are different. | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
Because what I have been arguing since I joined this thread is universal to all humans. It doesn't matter what disorder they have. It actually does. Sometimes people with MDD will literally have less serotonin in their head than normal human beings, and this is what causes them to be unhappy. It's a genetic abnormality, not a state of mind. I think that's what you don't understand. I do have a "disorder", adhd. Or maybe it's bi-polar. I experience symptoms from both. You might be misdiagnosing yourself. Experiencing its symptoms is not the same as having it. They just indicate that you might have it. A person who coughs doesn't necessarily have a cold. If you think of mental disorders like other genetic abnormalities, for example someone who is born with only 3 fingers, then you might understand better why they can't just magically fix themselves with a good attitude. I'll say it again. Everyone is depressed sometimes. Everyone feels sad sometimes. That doesn't mean they have MDD or bi-polar disorder or the like. These disorders are all characterized as chronic, and debilitating. Maybe that's not the best way to describe it... But what I mean is... the moods come to a person for almost no reason whatsoever, or in very exaggerated ways... Whereas normal human beings are reacting to their environment rationally. Like people who have MAD. It's literally defined as irrational intense anxiety. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 10:17 Chef wrote: Show nested quote + Because what I have been arguing since I joined this thread is universal to all humans. It doesn't matter what disorder they have. It actually does. Sometimes people with MDD will literally have less serotonin in their head than normal human beings, and this is what causes them to be unhappy. It's a genetic abnormality, not a state of mind. I think that's what you don't understand. I am aware it is a genetic issue. I understand this. I don't see the relevance to what I am saying. Do you believe your genes control what you do? You might be misdiagnosing yourself. Experiencing its symptoms is not the same as having it. They just indicate that you might have it. Are you sure? From what I understand, mental disorders are diagnosed on symptoms alone, because there is currently no other way. If you think of mental disorders like other genetic abnormalities, for example someone who is born with only 3 fingers, then you might understand better why they can't just magically fix themselves with a good attitude. It was never my claim they could fix theirselves. It was my claim that they are still responsible for their own actions and they can learn to overcome their emotions in terms of what they say and do, but not how they feel. I'll say it again. Everyone is depressed sometimes. Everyone feels sad sometimes. That doesn't mean they have MDD or bi-polar disorder or the like. These disorders are all characterized as chronic, and debilitating. well I have dealt with high highs and low lows for all of my life. I have had periods of months, years even, of being depressed and wanting to die almost every day. But I am not trying to convince you I have bi-polar. The term doesn't mean anything to me other than the symptoms which are associated with it. | ||
Chef
10810 Posts
Do you believe your genes control what you do? Absolutely. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
On April 21 2009 10:41 Chef wrote: Absolutely. to the extent that outside variables can't change it? like, if someone is born with genes that make them racist, they will be racist their entire life? | ||
BackHo
New Zealand400 Posts
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PH
United States6173 Posts
On April 21 2009 10:47 travis wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 10:41 Chef wrote: Do you believe your genes control what you do? Absolutely. to the extent that outside variables can't change it? like, if someone is born with genes that make them racist, they will be racist their entire life? There is no racism gene. There are, however, very likely genes that will affect the stability of certain chemicals and the formation of physical structures in your brain. | ||
Raithed
China7078 Posts
On April 21 2009 07:44 Hawk wrote: Are you kidding me lol He's an idiot, and that's completely wrong. how am i an idiot for stating what is MY OPINION, do you have any opinions at all? no. you just read and go "lol hes an idiot." i can retaliate and say that youre a dumbass too. right? right. jesus fucking christ. On April 21 2009 07:44 PH wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Of course within the realm of all remote possibilities in the universe, yes you could. But that's like asking a kleptomaniac to not packrat and steal, or like asking an OCD to not do his rituals. Actually, bipolar is probably more difficult to control than kleptomania and OCD. There is a reason why it is a diagnosed disorder...and that is because it's not simply an up and down of moods...it's severe enough that it warrants the attention of shrinks and psychologists (I know that's somewhat circular, but...). It can have severely damaging effects on a person's life, and simply brushing it off like that isn't fair to the person and the people around them. Yes, we are all "a little bipolar"...however, most of us don't have a bipolar disorder. EDIT Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 03:38 travis wrote: On April 21 2009 00:47 Hawk wrote: On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Man, I knew you were an idiot, but lol you shouldn't act like that regardless of how confident you are that you're right. I agree completely with raith, and if anything I am a little bi-polar myself. so don't be a dick. Raithed don't be upset that a lot of people here don't understand what you are saying. It is common. It's pretty clear what he's saying, and I still don't think he's any more right. There's a clear difference between you and someone with a bipolar disorder...it doesn't mess with your overall lifestyle like it does theirs. If it's not severe enough to warrant some kind of professional attention, then it's not relevant here. I'm not pushing for the complete foil of what you're saying...I don't think the OP's friend should be babied or anything like that, but expecting such as you and Raith are simply isn't going to happen. oh btw im not saying im right i never stated that, i just gave an opinion and im sticking with it. yet there are people who are literally taking it the wrong way which is lol. | ||
Deleted User 3420
24492 Posts
Raithed don't take it personally, I understood your contribution. | ||
kefkalives
Australia1272 Posts
Edit: At raithed, not trav. | ||
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Jibba
United States22883 Posts
On April 21 2009 11:17 Raithed wrote: It's a medical condition, and opinions can be wrong (ie. yours.) Your opinion is equally as valid here as it would be in a discussion on coronary artery bypass grafting.how am i an idiot for stating what is MY OPINION, do you have any opinions at all? no. you just read and go "lol hes an idiot." i can retaliate and say that youre a dumbass too. right? right. jesus fucking christ. | ||
Cloud
Sexico5880 Posts
On April 21 2009 11:11 PH wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 10:47 travis wrote: On April 21 2009 10:41 Chef wrote: Do you believe your genes control what you do? Absolutely. to the extent that outside variables can't change it? like, if someone is born with genes that make them racist, they will be racist their entire life? There is no racism gene. There are, however, very likely genes that will affect the stability of certain chemicals and the formation of physical structures in your brain. There are genes for behaviour. And people can teach themselves to go against it. Living in society is probably the most common example, as some people say genes want you to behave in a very selfish way. And well, wiki says life experiences take a huge part in this, so i guess a person should be able to conciously help himself to some degree. | ||
PH
United States6173 Posts
On April 21 2009 11:17 Raithed wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 07:44 Hawk wrote: Are you kidding me lol He's an idiot, and that's completely wrong. how am i an idiot for stating what is MY OPINION, do you have any opinions at all? no. you just read and go "lol hes an idiot." i can retaliate and say that youre a dumbass too. right? right. jesus fucking christ. Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 07:44 PH wrote: On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Of course within the realm of all remote possibilities in the universe, yes you could. But that's like asking a kleptomaniac to not packrat and steal, or like asking an OCD to not do his rituals. Actually, bipolar is probably more difficult to control than kleptomania and OCD. There is a reason why it is a diagnosed disorder...and that is because it's not simply an up and down of moods...it's severe enough that it warrants the attention of shrinks and psychologists (I know that's somewhat circular, but...). It can have severely damaging effects on a person's life, and simply brushing it off like that isn't fair to the person and the people around them. Yes, we are all "a little bipolar"...however, most of us don't have a bipolar disorder. EDIT On April 21 2009 03:38 travis wrote: On April 21 2009 00:47 Hawk wrote: On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Man, I knew you were an idiot, but lol you shouldn't act like that regardless of how confident you are that you're right. I agree completely with raith, and if anything I am a little bi-polar myself. so don't be a dick. Raithed don't be upset that a lot of people here don't understand what you are saying. It is common. It's pretty clear what he's saying, and I still don't think he's any more right. There's a clear difference between you and someone with a bipolar disorder...it doesn't mess with your overall lifestyle like it does theirs. If it's not severe enough to warrant some kind of professional attention, then it's not relevant here. I'm not pushing for the complete foil of what you're saying...I don't think the OP's friend should be babied or anything like that, but expecting such as you and Raith are simply isn't going to happen. oh btw im not saying im right i never stated that, i just gave an opinion and im sticking with it. yet there are people who are literally taking it the wrong way which is lol. There's more wrong about your opinion than there is right. Though I don't think it was necessary to begin name-calling, I did think your opinion was rather misled. An opinion is yours and yours alone, sure, but I also think it's foolish to stick to one in light of much support/evidence to the contrary. On April 21 2009 11:50 Cloud wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 11:11 PH wrote: On April 21 2009 10:47 travis wrote: On April 21 2009 10:41 Chef wrote: Do you believe your genes control what you do? Absolutely. to the extent that outside variables can't change it? like, if someone is born with genes that make them racist, they will be racist their entire life? There is no racism gene. There are, however, very likely genes that will affect the stability of certain chemicals and the formation of physical structures in your brain. There are genes for behaviour. And people can teach themselves to go against it. Living in society is probably the most common example, as some people say genes want you to behave in a very selfish way. And well, wiki says life experiences take a huge part in this, so i guess a person should be able to conciously help himself to some degree. The degree to which that affects one's behavior is still up for debate, afaik. iirc, it's at least clear that certain groupings of genes affect overarching personality types and/or tendencies/predispositions in behavior, but it begins to blur when you get into the finer details. I honestly have no position on the matter, though I would rather believe that we can, in fact, control our overall behavior and actions. | ||
Frits
11782 Posts
On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: Show nested quote + On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? I can't believe this started a discussion lol. No ofcourse that's not the case, we all have ups and downs obviously, but bipolar is so extreme in that sense that we can't come close to imagining it. People with mania have a different interpretation along with their actions. Again: bipolar disorder is a mood disorder, you're arguing like it's some kind of physiological thing where you do things against your will or whatever. Here's a excerpt about bipolar disorder: There is a particular kind of pain, elation, loneliness, and terror involved in this kind of madness. When you're high it's tremendous. The ideas and feelings are fast and frequent like shooting stars and you follow them until you find better and brighter ones. Shyness goed, the right words and gestures are suddenly there, the powere to seduce and captivate others a felt certainty. There are interests found in uninteresting people. Sensuality is pervasive and the desire to seduce and be seduced irresistible. Feelings of ease, intensity, power, well-being, financial omnipotence and euphoria now pervade one's marrow. But, somehwere, this changes. The fast ideas are far too fast and there are far too many; overwhelming confusion replaces clarity. Memory goes. Humor and absorption on friends' faces are replaced by fear and concern. Everything previously moving with the grain is now against - you are irritable, angry, frightened, uncontrollable, and enmeshed totally in the blackest caves of the mind. You never knew those caves were there. It will never end. Goodwin & Jamison, 1990 as read in Nolen-Hoeksema, 2007 You can be a 'little' bipolar I guess, which is called cyclothymic disorder which is less severe but more chronic. But what you need to remember about a diagnosis is that first of all the criteria for any diagnosis is that whatever you have needs to be adequately disruptive in your everyday life, then you can look at the DSMIV requirements for bipolar. On April 21 2009 07:52 travis wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 07:44 Hawk wrote: Are you kidding me lol He's an idiot, and that's completely wrong. Bi-Polar is a mood disorder. It is the same as being very very moody. Even very very moody people can learn to sit still and be quiet. Even very very moody people can learn to recognize their own mood swings, and understand that when their mood is changing they ought to slow down and be more careful about their decision-making. If you disagree with this, then why? The reason why this doesn't work is that when you suffer from mania especially your thoughts are racing and your perspective on the world is completely changed. I can't find any evidence anywhere that psychological therapy is effective for bipolar. Afaik the only thing that does a decent job of controlling it is lithium paired with anti-depressants, which are both medicine. Disorders are extreme, I think it's wrong to trivialize it by comparing it to yourself like you and Raithed seem to be doing. | ||
HeavOnEarth
United States7087 Posts
for the OP; not this silly discussion. | ||
HeavOnEarth
United States7087 Posts
On April 21 2009 00:47 Hawk wrote: Show nested quote + On April 21 2009 00:39 Raithed wrote: On April 20 2009 19:08 PH wrote: Plain and simple...if you want you and her to remain friends, you're going to have to have a LOT of patience. It's as simple as that. Stick around whatever happens. Raithed, I don't think you understand what bipolar disorder is as a disorder...that means a lot of it is simply beyond her control. you CANNNNN control it, cant you? i mean you KNOW what you did wrong but you already *did* it already. honest to say, arent we all a little bipolar? Man, I knew you were an fixed | ||
QuanticHawk
United States32054 Posts
On April 21 2009 11:28 Jibba wrote: Show nested quote + Your opinion is equally as valid here as it would be in a discussion on coronary artery bypass grafting.On April 21 2009 11:17 Raithed wrote: how am i an idiot for stating what is MY OPINION, do you have any opinions at all? no. you just read and go "lol hes an idiot." i can retaliate and say that youre a dumbass too. right? right. jesus fucking christ. Such an awesome quote | ||
BackHo
New Zealand400 Posts
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CharlieMurphy
United States22895 Posts
On April 20 2009 15:04 BackHo wrote: I have a friend who has bipolar disorder and her self esteem seems to be quite severely affected by her condition. She's actually very difficult to handle sometimes, which I think is why often people with mental disorders are also often victims of rejection. I've known people to be friends with her and then distance themselves from her when it gets too hard. I imagine that it can be quite draining being really good friends with someone like this. And it's definitely not her fault, but I think if it was managed better, she'd be easier to get along with. Because to be honest, she's actually one of the most kind, friendly and generous people I know. But sometimes she makes some silly decisions, and sometimes she can be quite irritating because she requires constant attention. Some days she comes to work and spends the whole evening complaining about everything that's wrong in her life, and other days she's the most bubbly and happy person in the world. It's quite difficult to deal with. yea, my mom is the exact same way. like exactly. Except our family situation has always been really fucked up and she is religious so she went a little crazy on the bible conspiracies or whatever when my parents were separating. And I totally agree on her being too generous and nice and people take advantage of it and treat her like shit in return. But yea it is hard to deal with someone who is so emotionally inept and seemingly unable to learn from bad mistakes and make rational decisions based on past experience. She is constantly blowing money on stupid shit and getting ripped off all the time. | ||
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