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 A guy I used to be in Boy Scouts with (take your shots if you want to) died yesterday. It's crazy. What sucks is that you always realize too late that you should have talked to that person one more time, or done something with them one more time. It's rough, because I was really good friends with him back then, but we hadn't really done much in several years. Still, when someone that young dies it's hard. I can't even imagine how his family feels. I mean, I guess I can, somewhat, because I've had a lot of family members die, but none have ever been so young. He was my age, two years old, about. He had been battling a brain tumor for four years; he was only supposed to live for one. I just feel like such a douche bag for not having kept in touch with him. And, the last time I had talked to him (on facebook), it had been so long since I had last talked to him, I just kind of assumed that he beat it (it was wishful thinking, and I just had this feeling that such a good, young guy should beat it. It was what should have happened, but I guess that's how life is). I sent him one more message after that, but never got a response.
It's so sad, because he was a great guy. And I'm not just saying that because he's dead now. He really was a good guy. A lot of people are assholes, and he wasn't one of them. I mean, he was a guy I hadn't talked to in a long time, but I still remembered him. People come and go in your life all the time, but not many leave any real memories with you. It's really sad. He was just in a fight that he couldn't win.
I guess, really, it makes me think about how fast things can come to an end. I remember when I found out about it from his dad; I ran into him at a fast-food restaurant near my job. It's like, you see stuff on TV about kids with cancer, and stuff like that, but it always seems so distant, and impossible to enter you life, and then it happens to someone you know. It's unreal.
I don't know what else to say, but I guess when shit like this happens it's always easier for me to write something down about it. He'll definitely be missed, that's for sure. It just makes me realize how fast it can all be taken away from us. If there's someone you haven't talked to in a while, but they were a good friend to you at some point, talk to them. You never know when that last chance is going to be...
RIP buddy.
 
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ouch RIP
something similar happened to me as well. I came into contact with this person online (through another friend) back around 6th grade (so that's about seven or eight years ago) and we would chat on AIM daily and email each other a lot, even though I had never met this person in person. Very fun person to talk to. Anyways we stopped chatting like a year and a half later (I totally forgot why) and I just recently thought about going on to facebook and coming in contact again. I searched for the name but didn't find anything. I assumed the person didn't have a facebook, so I just went about my ways
Then, just like a few days ago, I stumbled upon a facebook group titled "RIP (person's name)." It totally blew my mind. I still haven't figured out what exactly happened.
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I guess we live in the now. Its all about reality and your ability to accept it. Things come our way but the real battle lies within, whether or not you'd make out of the pit totally depends on what you have decided in the first place.
Friends come and go but we never forget the moments and good memories. Good memories are what they are. We miss them because they are good.
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Spenguin
Australia3316 Posts
RIP
On December 18 2008 17:37 smasherjosh wrote:
hmm
True.
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It's a weirder emotion when it's some one who is some you meet for a short time compared to some one your closer too. I've been through both a couple time unfortunately. In a weird way when it's some one really close to a sister or a close friend who have been battling a disease for a while you kind of have points where you for lack of a better phrase you can say goodbye. But for some one who was important to you but you were not in contact with it's a bit of a disconnect and you will never be able to have proper closure and confirm to them at for at least one moment in your life they were the closest person too you and they will always be in your memories. I'm sorry your lost of some one who was part of your life and was important too you. I always found a funeral too be an important part of the grieving process but since I'm sure it's already been completed I recommend visiting his tombstone if possible it always helps me.
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On December 18 2008 17:52 jimmybim wrote:
It's a weirder emotion when it's some one who is some you meet for a short time compared to some one your closer too. I've been through both a couple time unfortunately. In a weird way when it's some one really close to a sister or a close friend who have been battling a disease for a while you kind of have points where you for lack of a better phrase you can say goodbye. But for some one who was important to you but you were not in contact with it's a bit of a disconnect and you will never be able to have proper closure and confirm to them at for at least one moment in your life they were the closest person too you and they will always be in your memories. I'm sorry your lost of some one who was part of your life and was important too you. I always found a funeral too be an important part of the grieving process but since I'm sure it's already been completed I recommend visiting his tombstone if possible it always helps me.
It's Friday, actually. I have to talk to my manager and see if I can go in late on that day. I want to at least say something to his dad and mom. His dad was a huge part of my life growing up, too. He was one of the Scout leaders.
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I basically lost touch with everybody I went to school with. If any one of them dies, I probably wouldn't know about it until years after.
You are lucky to have had at least one good friend. I couldn't get any good friends at all from the school that I went to because it was a breeding ground for assholes. You tend not to miss any assholes when they die.
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United States24500 Posts
On December 18 2008 17:26 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote: A guy I used to be in Boy Scouts with (take your shots if you want to) died yesterday. RIP buddy.
What a poor reflection on our community if people feel like they need to be defensive for mentioning that they were in the Boy Scouts. (not your fault SweeTLemonS[TPR]!)
I knew a guy in the boy scouts who got shot (as a youth). It was actually a stray bullet from several miles away, and he recovered, so I wouldn't put the case in the same category.
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On December 18 2008 22:50 micronesia wrote:Show nested quote +On December 18 2008 17:26 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote: A guy I used to be in Boy Scouts with (take your shots if you want to) died yesterday. RIP buddy. What a poor reflection on our community if people feel like they need to be defensive for mentioning that they were in the Boy Scouts. (not your fault SweeTLemonS[TPR]!) I knew a guy in the boy scouts who got shot (as a youth). It was actually a stray bullet from several miles away, and he recovered, so I wouldn't put the case in the same category. Yeah, I never really understood why people feel so defensive about that, I'm a boyscout too (Eagle yay!) and never had any problems with telling people that.
Anyways, RIP to your friend, it's always a weird feeling losing someone you felt you should've gotten to know better.
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Sorry to hear that....I was in boy scouts as well but just for camping and having fun (2nd Class)
About 2 years ago I had made a new friend which I ended up finding out through that new friend that a real good friend thru middle school had died during his junior year of high school (we went to different high schools after middle school and didn't keep in touch) in a nasty car wreck. I was astounded by hearing this b/c we were such good friends during middle school and I was sad that I didn't keep in touch with him.
On a sidenote that friend had always clowned on me for being in boy scouts...
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On December 18 2008 22:50 micronesia wrote:Show nested quote +On December 18 2008 17:26 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote: A guy I used to be in Boy Scouts with (take your shots if you want to) died yesterday. RIP buddy. What a poor reflection on our community if people feel like they need to be defensive for mentioning that they were in the Boy Scouts. (not your fault SweeTLemonS[TPR]!) I knew a guy in the boy scouts who got shot (as a youth). It was actually a stray bullet from several miles away, and he recovered, so I wouldn't put the case in the same category.
I don't know that it's necessarily because of the community here, so much as it is every where else. It was a good experience most people will never have. I've gotten so used to people outside of TL teasing about it that I put that there.
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United States17042 Posts
On December 19 2008 03:48 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:Show nested quote +On December 18 2008 22:50 micronesia wrote:On December 18 2008 17:26 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote: A guy I used to be in Boy Scouts with (take your shots if you want to) died yesterday. RIP buddy. What a poor reflection on our community if people feel like they need to be defensive for mentioning that they were in the Boy Scouts. (not your fault SweeTLemonS[TPR]!) I knew a guy in the boy scouts who got shot (as a youth). It was actually a stray bullet from several miles away, and he recovered, so I wouldn't put the case in the same category. I don't know that it's necessarily because of the community here, so much as it is every where else. It was a good experience most people will never have. I've gotten so used to people outside of TL teasing about it that I put that there.
I agree, for some reason being in boy scouts in general seems to get a negative reaction (I'm an eagle scout by the way).
Friends are friends, and most of the time you assume (correctly) that they'll be around for just about forever. It's really rough when they aren't.
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Hey, I really relate to what you feel. I knew a young person as well who was born with a lot of complications and had to take many medicines every day. I remember playing Super Nintendo with him, and he was really really good at it. Whenever I couldn't get passed a hard part in super mario or donkey kong country, he would always be able to pass those parts.
Then, I stopped seeing him as much. One day, a few years later, my mom told me that he passed away. It was surreal, he was too young and too happy in life for that to happen. At that time, I was young also and did not really feel much about it. But today, and sometimes every few weeks/months, I remember him and I feel really sad. My heart aches when I remember the good memories I had of him and how he did not deserve to die at such a young age.
One thing I remember is that he always seemed happy, with a smile on his face. Never was angry or depressed, always was laughing. I think that part hurts the most because someone who was such a happy and good person on the inside doesn't deserve that kind of fate. There are many bad people who exist in this world who exploit others, or do drugs and crimes, but why do they have the chance to live while genuinely good, pure people do not? I ask this question to myself, and hopefully one day I will find an answer, but until then, I think of my friend and remember the good times we had together.
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My thoughts:
1. Boy Scouts is awesome
2. Cancer isn't something you just "beat" because you are strong. Its just nasty stuff.
3. Sorry man. Life is hard. Just goes to show why we should all be nicer or more open than we would normally be in life, because opportunities go by and never come back.
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EPT
