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Fortune Cookie

Blogs > GrayArea
Post a Reply
GrayArea
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States872 Posts
June 10 2008 05:37 GMT
#1
“A good position and a comfortable salary will be yours.”

This is the fortune my fortune cookie gives me. How sad. What a sad, pathetic fortune cookie this is. Not because of the fortune it is telling me, and how I will perceive the message it is giving me. No, it is sad and pathetic because of the message it is saying about mankind.

This fortune cookie is more than a “fortune”; it is a symbol and reflection of humanity. This fortune cookie assumes that I am currently in a bad position and am earning an uncomfortable salary. What if I’m Bill Gates, then what? I probably wouldn’t be eating at a fast food Chinese restaurant, but still, I would be in a damn good position and already have a more than comfortable salary. This message tells me that the majority of citizens are in a bad position with an uncomfortable salary. It may be the truth, but I shouldn’t have to hear it from my fortune cookie, especially not after enjoying a pretty decent meal.

I suppose I shouldn’t expect too much from a fortune cookie, but still, they print these things in bulk. Can’t they print some motivational cool message that people can gain inspiration from? No, instead they tell me that I am in a crap position that isn’t even “good,” and that I am earning some below average salary. I would have accepted “You will attain one of the greatest positions.” It may not be true but at least it doesn’t put me below “good.” So what if this cookie is simply reflecting the truth: that most people are in a sub par position with low incomes, the fortune shouldn’t have to recognize this and try and give me false hopes (even though this is what most fortunes do). It should at least give me a message that I can extract meaning from and apply towards my life. Something like, “You will be the change you wish to see in the world (Quote by Mahatma Gandhi modified).”

Ok, maybe I am overreacting and taking this too far. Let me try a completely different perspective. This fortune cookie is telling me that I will be in a “good position” with a “comfortable salary.” WTF kind of lame fortune is this. A quality fortune would tell me that I will be in one of the best positions earning a high pay salary. This would really make someone happy. There is a very high probability that this will be false to most people, but heck, at least its serving its purpose as a fortune: getting your hopes up for a future that will most likely never be yours.

Overall, this is one of my worst experiences with a fortune cookie yet.


****
Kang Min Fighting!
Dr.Dragoon
Profile Joined November 2007
United States1241 Posts
June 10 2008 05:39 GMT
#2
Wow, your fortune cookies actually give you fortunes? Mine are always things like "You have a sense of humor", or something like that.
~o~ I have returned
clazziquai
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
6685 Posts
June 10 2008 05:42 GMT
#3
My fortune cookie said,

"It's about time I got out of the cookie."

No joke. ><
#1 Sea.Really Fan / #1 Nesh Fan / Terran Forever~
Goosey
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States695 Posts
June 10 2008 05:44 GMT
#4
I always save my fortune cookie fortunes with ominous messages. So far I have:

"Today is not your day; if you can't beat em, join em."
"Now is not the right time for a party."
"Justice lives next door to revenge."
and my favorite
"By enduring misfortune now you will be rewarded later."


And now to apply the crucial modifiers to your fortune:
"A good position and a comfortable salary will be yours... In Bed" Looks like you are going to become a prostitute, but a well paid one. GRATS

"A good position and a comfortable salary will be yours... Except in Bed" Ohhh so you may still be selling your body, but you won't be paid well and you never studied the kama sutra. Tough luck
#1 Shuttle Fan.
JIJI
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Canada291 Posts
June 10 2008 05:46 GMT
#5
On June 10 2008 14:42 clazziquai wrote:
My fortune cookie said,

"It's about time I got out of the cookie."

No joke. ><

Haha, that's a good one!
Believing forever in sAviOr. Jaedong complete domination. IefNaij scarab explosion. MUCH <3
clazziquai
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
6685 Posts
June 10 2008 05:49 GMT
#6
Hehe I want Chinese food now.

I am so hungry
#1 Sea.Really Fan / #1 Nesh Fan / Terran Forever~
Zanno
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
United States1484 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-06-10 06:09:02
June 10 2008 06:05 GMT
#7
The last time I ordered Chinese food was in NYC, and not only was it the best damn Chinese food I've had in my whole life, the fortune cookies must have been penned by some zen master.

So my friend has been sitting there for about 13 hours straight attempting to get to Level 50 in Halo 3, I've been sitting there bitching about how I'm completely broke and I shouldn't be dropping $30 on chinese food, then we crack open our fortunes and are like "whoa"

His fortune: "Your perseverance is severely misguided. Take a break."
My fortune: "Try not to worry about your finances."

If that wasn't enough magical fortune cookie mysteriousness, my other friend doesn't want his fortune cookie, so I open it up a little later and it says: "An old friend is desperately trying to get in contact with you."

I check my cell phone and my ex-girlfriend left me a rather long, droning voicemail and about 6 text messages asking why I wasn't picking up my phone. I never did call her back ^_^
aaaaa
Descent
Profile Joined January 2008
1244 Posts
June 10 2008 06:13 GMT
#8
There's nothing wrong with your logic, but you can choose to view it in an antiparallel way. The fortune cookie is a representation of human society...but doesn't it also showcase the capabilities and technologies of modern humanity, on some low level? After all, the fortune cookie exists, and it had to be created somehow.~ xO

But, to be honest, I only skimmed your post, and this post is just a quick reflection~ x3
「 Dream & Future 」 ※ 「 STX SouL 」
conCentrate9
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States438 Posts
June 10 2008 06:14 GMT
#9
On June 10 2008 15:05 Zanno wrote:
The last time I ordered Chinese food was in NYC, and not only was it the best damn Chinese food I've had in my whole life, the fortune cookies must have been penned by some zen master.

So my friend has been sitting there for about 13 hours straight attempting to get to Level 50 in Halo 3, I've been sitting there bitching about how I'm completely broke and I shouldn't be dropping $30 on chinese food, then we crack open our fortunes and are like "whoa"

His fortune: "Your perseverance is severely misguided. Take a break."
My fortune: "Try not to worry about your finances."

If that wasn't enough magical fortune cookie mysteriousness, my other friend doesn't want his fortune cookie, so I open it up a little later and it says: "An old friend is desperately trying to get in contact with you."

I check my cell phone and my ex-girlfriend left me a rather long, droning voicemail and about 6 text messages asking why I wasn't picking up my phone. I never did call her back ^_^


Perhaps... I should eat more Chinese food.
XCetron
Profile Joined November 2006
5226 Posts
June 10 2008 06:19 GMT
#10
this is cue for me to get panda express for lunch tomorow.
AltaiR_
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Korea (South)922 Posts
June 10 2008 06:50 GMT
#11
add "in bed" at the end of any fortune cookie paper
Translator
jtan
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Sweden5891 Posts
June 10 2008 08:06 GMT
#12
my fortune cookie didn't say anything and tasted like paper
Enter a Uh
Xeris
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
Iran17695 Posts
June 10 2008 08:10 GMT
#13
my fortune cookie said I was going to become a progamer and move to Korea.
twitter.com/xerislight -- follow me~~
Siefu
Profile Joined November 2004
Australia205 Posts
June 10 2008 12:13 GMT
#14
On June 10 2008 15:05 Zanno wrote:
The last time I ordered Chinese food was in NYC, and not only was it the best damn Chinese food I've had in my whole life, the fortune cookies must have been penned by some zen master.

So my friend has been sitting there for about 13 hours straight attempting to get to Level 50 in Halo 3, I've been sitting there bitching about how I'm completely broke and I shouldn't be dropping $30 on chinese food, then we crack open our fortunes and are like "whoa"

His fortune: "Your perseverance is severely misguided. Take a break."
My fortune: "Try not to worry about your finances."

If that wasn't enough magical fortune cookie mysteriousness, my other friend doesn't want his fortune cookie, so I open it up a little later and it says: "An old friend is desperately trying to get in contact with you."

I check my cell phone and my ex-girlfriend left me a rather long, droning voicemail and about 6 text messages asking why I wasn't picking up my phone. I never did call her back ^_^

srs? That shit is weirdly profound. Either the fortunes read your minds or fate gave them to you specifically, or of course it was a huge coincidence. Still it's pretty hard to believe it worked out that way, what if you had chosen the other cookie instead, what then?
He walks among us, but he is not one of us.
Ecael
Profile Joined February 2008
United States6703 Posts
June 10 2008 12:30 GMT
#15
On June 10 2008 15:50 AltaiR_ wrote:
add "in bed" at the end of any fortune cookie paper

I do love xkcd so

Where did you order from, Zanno? I can use a decent Chinese place to order from while I am at school, I am honestly getting sick of running home every week for decent Chinese food because I suck so much at cooking
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