The anger, the pain, the sadness are at times unbearable, and have costed me sleeping less than 5 hours daily for a few months, sometimes with no sleep at all.
There were times I felt so desperate that I was going to be at the very front myself, risking getting shot by the police, risking jail time, just to hope that someone important or the world would pay attention and do something.
I was part of the telegram group that proposed the 5 demands with everyone.
1. Withdraw the extradition bill
2. Cancel the riot classification of 16th June
3. Independent investigation on the police brutality
4. Release all protesters
5. Universal Suffrage
The first few months we spend a lot on what to do:
- Should we throw bricks? How about petrol bomb?
- What do we need to defend ourselves against tear gas?
- How to build road blocks? How to slow down the police?
- How to escape police arrest? (some of their tactics are frankly ridiculous, they would literally kidnap protesters by hiding in a truck, dash out and grab protesters and leave)
- What do we do when pro Beijing thugs attack us?
- What do we do when it's just one pro Beijing guy looking for trouble?
- How can we keep the support from the people while protesting?
- Do we march if the police doesn't approve the march?
- Should we "decorate" the pro Beijing store?
Of cause there are more, like how to get international attention, what kind of protests we can do, let's design a flag, a song.
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And things just never gotten better.
- Suicides;
- Raped by police (and abortion);
- Blinded by police (including reporters);
- Framing protesters by putting weapons into their bags when arrested
- Police charging assault when they beat down the protesters so hard that he needs 10 stitches in the head, while the police only get a literal scratch.
- Police charging assault for the speaker too loud to his ear
- Police using live round to a protester without a single weapon at hand.
- Police worked with Pro-Beijing thugs who attacked indiscriminately, including journalist and a pregnant woman
- Police speeding up police van to ramp into protesters
- Police ramping protesters with a motorcycle.
- Attacks on universities
- Undercover cop
- Suspected murders (disappearing cases);
- Suspected arrested protesters transferred to Mainland China;
- Locking up Indonesian maid for her coverage of HK protest (including to have her removed her cloths to a male doctor) and eventually deported her back to Indonesia, despite her employers repeatedly confirmed she will extend the contract;
- Bit off ear by Pro Beijing thug;
- Knifing by Pro Beijing Thug that led to one protester never able to walk again;
- Pro Beijing driver crashing a taxi into a crowd of protesters leading to one never able to walk again (taxi driver is now back at work, while the protesters are charged with unlawful assembly);
Deliberately releasing Pro Beijing thugs attacking protesters and arresting protesters instead;
And more.
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The saddest part to see someone arrested, is not just that his heads are bleeding, or the police bashing his ankles for the fun of it etc.
It's when they try to shout out their names to the press and pedestrian, so that the lawyers and family can help, the police will cover their mouths.
And since there are so many very strange suicide cases, they would also try to shout out that they have NO INTENTION TO COMMIT SUICIDE.
The press will also make a remark how they have no physical injuries during the arrest (if that's the case), so that if there are injuries at court, we know they suffered physical assault in the station.
For people like me who are a little older, we normally have other kind of support.
Donation; food coupon for those whose family won't let them back home; drivers to help to leave the scene; strike; shop at pro democracy stores.
But right now, more than 6,000s have been arrested, and that's just the official figures. 40% are students, some are younger than 18.
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I guess what I write this blog is, please keep us in the back of your mind.
Things are quieter now because a lot of the front-lines are arrested.
This protest isn't about economy, it is about our way of living.
Like many of you, we are used to a free society, and CCP is trying to change that, replace that with freedom/democracy/human right with Chinese characteristics.
They think what they do in Xinjiang is morally right because they are fighting "terrorism" when they are using fascist methods.
We are still trying to find a way to do this long haul, but we need US' help, EU's help, Japan, Korea's help. We need all the help we need.
We still have weekly schedule for our protest, it's almost like daily to be honest but they are at a much smaller scale on the weekdays normally.
We haven't given up yet, not because we have hope, but that there's really no going back.
Fight for Freedom, Stand with Hong Kong isn't just a slogan.
CCP will export its model out and the world is although politically complex but it is also simple minded, driven by economy growth.
Any political regime will slowly accept and integrate CCP's model on monitoring and "maintaining" its society.
Unless you, being one of its citizens, remind them that there are individuals' right are to be protected and that you all value them highly.
Here's an album that has some of my best captures covering this protest, I hope this brings a more personal touch than what you see in the news:
https://imgur.com/a/uuDM8gh
here's a video for the recent huge march we had: