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Exciting Blog: Proper Apostrophe Usage

Blogs > ninazerg
Post a Reply
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
June 14 2018 23:55 GMT
#1
It's time for an ePiC rAnT, folk's. In this crazy world of our's, there are these idiot's out there who do one of the most annoying thing's possible: they place, at random, apostrophe's into word's where an apostrophe ought not be. It change's a plural noun into a possessive noun and the sentence make's no goddamn sense.

So, for the betterment of humanity, I'm going to give a proper tutorial of when and when not to use apostrophe's for everyone who struggle's with this impossible concept, aka The Failure of The Public Education System, which is ENTIRELY the fault of my cousin, who is a teacher.

First of all, apostrophe's should be used randomly, and without regards to context! Haha, just kidding. Gotcha. You were fooled, admit it. But no, in all seriousness, apostrophe's should only be used to describe two things that go together. For example: If there is a mother and son, they'll probably commit incest in hentai. It's "The mother's son", aka he belongs to her. On the flip-side, it'd also be "The son's mother". In this regard, she belong's to him, which is the set-up for this hentai.

Second, apostrophe's can be used in contraction's. A contraction is the tightening of the muscle's in the uterus during childbirth. It's also when you take two word's and smash them together into one word. Example: "They are" -> "They're".

Third, proper usage of plural's: Okay, so follow me down this rabbit hole for a second. You don't normally use an apostrophe for a plural unless that plural of something also possesse's/is associated with something, and then, there are rule's for proper apostrophe usage. Any time there are multiple's of something, it is a plural. Example's: "Goose" (one goose), "Geese" (plural of 'goose'). Okay, maybe that's a bad example. Usually, plural's will end with an "s". Don't ask me why; I didn't invent this language. If a word ends with an "s", you put the apostrophe AFTER the effing "s".

Sometime's, people will use apostrophe's after acronyms, such as "STD's". In this case, it's still wrong and you shouldn't do it. Many people will do this with decade's, like in "1990's" or "1970's". There are multiple year's, so you wouldn'- AH, FUCK IT



*slides everything off of desk*

Let's talk about a movie

[image loading]

So, hidden here in my self-parody blog, I want to talk about Your Name (2016), aka Kimi no Na wa which I watched last night. For anti-spoiler purposes, I'm going to start off by saying that I recommend this movie, even if you're not an effing weeb. Weebery in general will help you to enjoy this movie, but is not required. It's just a well-made film. No wonder it's the highest-grossing movie in Japan of all-time.

When I think of animated films from Japan, I usually think of Hayao Miyazaki and some of the stuff he's done, which is usually meant to be visually appealing. What I like most about Miyazaki is that he walked into that boardroom with those graphic-design students and told them that their computer simulation that learned to walk on its own was 'an insult to life itself'. I might actually be crucified in the modern age of late-stage capitalism for saying that I'm not really a fan of his story-telling. He constructs these beautiful worlds, and then gives them boring stories where not much really happens. What I mean by that is that in any Miyazaki film, you could get up to make some Hot Pockets, then come back and you'll generally not miss much.

However, I didn't make this blog to rip on Miyazaki. I'll save that for a later blog entitled "Fuck Hayao Miyazaki" and just shit on him for 5,000 words. He's a brilliant man and has made some incredible masterpieces, so it's hard not to compare a big animated film from Japan to him. I hope that's fair. I hope it's also fair to put a couple of things out there: nearly every movie looks 'good' nowadays. It's hard to find an ugly movie where you just go "The story was great, but the movie looked like shit." The second thing I'd put forth is that, in animated films, something that makes films breath-taking is how much effort is put into animating something complex.

Usually, when there is something that is difficult to draw or animate, computers draw it. That's the case with something like the magic carpet in Disney's Aladdin, where the carpet has a fairly complex design on it. Although Your Name looked really good, there were a lot of computer-animated or computer-drawn things, and noticing it took away a little from how good this film looked. I'd still give it a thumbs-up for looking beautiful. I'm just very pretentious and haughty about it. I just see a computer-animated door closing, scoff loudly, cross my arms, and say with a smug face, "That could've been hand-drawn. I can tell that's computer-drawn." and then rapidly turn my head to eat an owl right out of the air while in flight...?

I went into this movie cold, knowing almost nothing about it, except that there are two characters that are "connected". I didn't know how, so I was immediately trying to figure it out, and was like "They're switching bodies." Boom. Nailed it. Kind of. I was wondering what the arc of the movie would be, and it was a lot different than I thought. I thought it might be that they are both the same person and don't realize it, or one is a reincarnation. Instead, it's two separate people who are switching bodies for no apparent reason, and I thought that'd be the movie. Nope.

So, what we actually have is a time-loop, which is one of my favorite movie tropes. I like time-loops because they make you think, but also because it's easy to mess them up with plot-holes. Just look at the Terminator series. So, you have to do it well. One movie that comes to mind is Predestination (and you thought I was gonna say Looper), where there is a perpetual time-loop going. Similar to Predestination, Your Name's time-loop has an imminent disaster and a love story between two characters that are connected by the time-loop who fall in love. However, in Your Name, the movie starts with the time-loop going, and then being broken when history is re-written.

Our hero, Taki, and our heroine, Mitsuha, start switching bodies because Taki went to the shrine and drank the sake that contains Mitsuha's essence, but he did this because he went into the past to become Mitsuha, which causes Mitsuha to go and meet with past-Taki, and then present-Taki remembers this later -- which is related to the time-loop.When Taki carries the bracelet Mitsuha made, this connects them together, which means that present-Taki became connected to past-Mitsuha when past-Mitsuha met with past-Taki, causing past-Mitsuha to assume the role of present-Taki, which causes present-Taki to go to the shrine and drink the sake.

While the movie goes light on the humor, there are some funny moments that occur because of the body-switching, such as Mitsuha getting Taki to go on a date with a woman he used to have a crush on, but doesn't really fancy anymore, and Taki as Mitsuha doing 'inappropriate for a girl' things, and fist-bumping with Sayaka. You'd think they spend a lot of time messing with their private parts while switched, and while movie touches on this (PUN INTENDED; WAS PLANNED ALL ALONG) it steers clear of getting graphic about it. Taki (as Mitsuha) does a lot of self-boob-touching, and during a montage, Mitsuha (as Taki) is shown reaching slowly towards her/his crotch (God, this is confusing to explain) so you know it definitely happened.

The time-loop is broken when Taki attempts to save Mitsuha from a comet that kills her in the past. In a magic moment of them meeting across time in space in a vision, they attempt to write their names on each other's hands so they won't forget. After all, if Mitsuha is saved, then Taki would never meet her.

Even with the time-loop being broken, Taki and Mitsuha meet by chance five years later and recognize each other. Really happy ending. It made me feel emotions and stuff.

Although I didn't cry during this film, I felt very emotionally moved by it. It was kind of depressing, because the escapism of the film just kinda ended. It was such a happy feeling at the end of the film, and then I went back to real life. This is exactly why we need a strong-willed President to Make Anime Real, so we can live in a beautiful dream.


8/10 Tiamat Comet Chunks, would recommend.

***
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
jrkirby
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States1510 Posts
June 15 2018 00:16 GMT
#2
Your name didnt' have any moment's where I was like, "Man, thats' fucking stupid. Shit makes no sense, not consistent at all". Storie's involving time travel/time shenanigan's almost alway's do. Thats' a testament to how well it was' written.
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
June 15 2018 00:50 GMT
#3
"Nobody leaves the netherworld without leaving part of themselves"

Taki gave Mitsuha the bracelet during the vision/dream/spirit walk thing

shiiiiiiiiit
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
HerbMon
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States463 Posts
June 15 2018 04:02 GMT
#4
I enjoyied this intire movie. Its like I was-able to watch it with my eye's clothed.
How we will win in the period ahead.
HerbMon
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States463 Posts
Last Edited: 2018-06-15 04:39:33
June 15 2018 04:04 GMT
#5
I'm stupid.
How we will win in the period ahead.
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
Last Edited: 2018-06-15 22:43:28
June 15 2018 04:21 GMT
#6
I like cats
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
Ty2
Profile Blog Joined March 2013
United States1434 Posts
June 15 2018 14:03 GMT
#7
--- Nuked ---
Writer
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
Last Edited: 2018-06-15 20:05:47
June 15 2018 20:04 GMT
#8
In 2020 machine AI will become so powerful it will convince humans to always prepend apostrophes with backslashes except when delimiting strings. There are some who say this has already happened.

That is why I, a member of the Human Fighting Force For Continued Human Existence, refuse to use them.

Also, having learned Japanese, I can no longer watch anime. This is once of life\'s many paradoxes that will prepare you for the eternal world of ghosts which await us all.
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
June 15 2018 22:44 GMT
#9
On June 16 2018 05:04 Chef wrote:
In 2020 machine AI will become so powerful it will convince humans to always prepend apostrophes with backslashes except when delimiting strings. There are some who say this has already happened.

That is why I, a member of the Human Fighting Force For Continued Human Existence, refuse to use them.

Also, having learned Japanese, I can no longer watch anime. This is once of life\'s many paradoxes that will prepare you for the eternal world of ghosts which await us all.


Chef is the new Yokokano.
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
JimmyJRaynor
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada16719 Posts
June 17 2018 01:46 GMT
#10
RBI's = Runs Batted In.
Ray Kassar To David Crane : "you're no more important to Atari than the factory workers assembling the cartridges"
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
June 17 2018 02:46 GMT
#11
On June 17 2018 10:46 JimmyJRaynor wrote:
RBI's = Runs Batted In.


RBIs

"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
BLinD-RawR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
ALLEYCAT BLUES50238 Posts
June 17 2018 07:49 GMT
#12
Apostrophe?

don't you mean God's comma?
Brood War EICWoo Jung Ho, never forget.| Twitter: @BLinDRawR
TL+ Member
JimmyJRaynor
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada16719 Posts
Last Edited: 2018-06-17 21:28:20
June 17 2018 21:24 GMT
#13
On June 17 2018 11:46 ninazerg wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 17 2018 10:46 JimmyJRaynor wrote:
RBI's = Runs Batted In.

RBIs

your blog has inspired me to start my own english lessons...
i'm calling it

" apostrophes for beginner's "

before taking my course i recommend " English For Beginner's "

Ray Kassar To David Crane : "you're no more important to Atari than the factory workers assembling the cartridges"
JieXian
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Malaysia4677 Posts
Last Edited: 2018-06-19 09:16:09
June 19 2018 09:15 GMT
#14
Wow I liked how you smoothy slid from a rant blog into an anime movie review 5 Yokos /5

On June 16 2018 07:44 ninazerg wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 16 2018 05:04 Chef wrote:
In 2020 machine AI will become so powerful it will convince humans to always prepend apostrophes with backslashes except when delimiting strings. There are some who say this has already happened.

That is why I, a member of the Human Fighting Force For Continued Human Existence, refuse to use them.

Also, having learned Japanese, I can no longer watch anime. This is once of life\'s many paradoxes that will prepare you for the eternal world of ghosts which await us all.


Chef is the new Yokokano.


At first I thought you were referring to Yoko Ono, and then it hit me. I had forgotten about that other psycho.
Please send me a PM of any song you like that I most probably never heard of! I am looking for people to chat about writing and producing music | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noD-bsOcxuU |
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