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I think that, during a good portion of their lives, most people believe they are capable of being among the best at something. That if they really, truly dedicated themselves to a craft, they would be one of the best, if not the absolute best. Perhaps some people go through their entire lives believing this. The story about the 'quarterback that could, if coach had just given me a chance' comes in many forms, and is not uncommon even in old age. I used to believe the same thing; that I could be a professional gamer had I chosen the path. I didn't, because it was the early 00s and nobody made money from it save for a select few. But I really, truly believed that I was good enough.
Until I watched first person vods of NaDa.
My childhood is, by now, probably a very well-known story to the internet in general. Gifted kid, bit of a loner, smart but doesn't participate in discussions, does okay in school but doesn't seem interested. It seems like every other person on the English-speaking internet lived this life and at this point frankly I'm sick of hearing about it. My pastime, once we had internet, was video games. I started on Blizzard games like Diablo 1 and Starcraft, but very quickly expanded to other genres. I found that, for the most part, I was a lot more competitive than others. This mindset led me to strive to get better; in hindsight, I guess it might have been an outlet after I stopped playing soccer.
So naturally, spending so many hours on games I ended up fairly good at them. Even now I consider myself a 'generalist' - I excel at a few genres, am pretty good at most, and I'm confident that were I to play an unfamiliar one I could be good at it too. There's a lot of crossover in general, I think. But I was broken of the illusion that I could ever be 'the best' at Starcraft when I was, I think, 18, in 2007.
The scene changed rapidly, back then. When I first arrived to the community we mostly got news in the form of written reports post-game. Rarely, you could catch a stream of horrific quality in 320x240. Different world. Anyway, living in New Zealand it was impossible for me to watch streams reliably in the first place. So I liked to rely on downloads instead; I snapped up leaked pro replays whenever I could, they were amazing.
Here's the thing about replays, though: they don't get you inside the game. Take a competitive FPS, for instance. You watch a player and you can see right away that they are fantastic. Their reflexes, aim, and results are what put them at the top. But these aspects of them are only human. They can, with enough time and effort, be emulated. What they're missing is the game sense, the thought process. Nowadays, you can actually get some of that too from streams on Twitch - but we didn't have that luxury back then, and even if we did the vast majority of us didn't speak Korean anyway.
So imagine my surprise when NaDa, 3x OSL winner and the greatest Terran player of all time (at the time), had fpvods leaked. I idolized this guy, he was who I wanted to emulate most. I had spent hours watching his replays, taking his build orders and watching his micro/macro. I was so happy that, finally, I would get to see how he really played - that I'd be able to evaluate his actual decision making in real time.
I don't know what the time record is for dreams being shattered but there was an audible sound of glass breaking in my mind. He wasn't human. It is one thing to see that someone has 350-400 APM; I played at 150 with spikes to 250 when I played TvZ, and with more experience I thought I could achieve similar results. It is another thing entirely to watch it in action. 360 actions per minute is 6 actions per second but watching NaDa you would swear his screen switched locations 20 times a second. Forget being as good as him, I wasn't even playing the same game.
It's hard to imagine the possibility that anyone could give up so fast on something they felt so strongly about, but reality is often harsh and stark. It's very difficult to lie to yourself when faced with the sheer absurdity of the truth. In a way, though, it was a little exciting to know that he was different. That there was some kind of ethereal, inhuman quality separating me and these professionals. After that, I stopped playing Brood War with any real intent to get better; I was secure in the knowledge that I would never reach the ceiling. Actually, I didn't think anyone would ever be better. Imagine my surprise when the triumvirate of Flash/Jaedong/Bisu came along and ousted the kings of the time - but that's another story, I guess.
It's weird to think that a video game had such a profound effect on me, but it's safe to say I no longer harbor such delusions of grandeur, ha. This is ancient history by now and I'm a completely different person, but it's fun to look back and remember the time I saw how a legend played firsthand. I sometimes wonder if other people never have their 'NaDa moment' and go on with their lives confident that they're the best. What a trip.
 
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it's okay. many korean progamers feel the same way about nada. not because of his handspeed but his ability to win games without practicing or preparing too much for tournaments.
"We tried painting NaDa as this very hard worker when we were casting... when in reality he was one of the laziest...!"
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He's supposed to be lazy and get good results, why'd you think they call him Genius Terran
+ Show Spoiler +tbh I think he puts in work like everyone else who got good at the game 
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That's an interesting story. I'm curious about what you started to value more once you were forced to give up on the idea that you could become world class. It's a difficult thing to come to terms with and as you say, many people have to go through it so I find the ways that everyone deals with it very interesting. Personally I have always trended towards valuing effort and conviction over results so it wasn't too much trouble to give up on my dreams of being the very best.
Also Nada was my favorite Terran when I was young. His legacy is so amazing.
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On September 09 2017 12:43 DepressionSC wrote:
That's an interesting story. I'm curious about what you started to value more once you were forced to give up on the idea that you could become world class. It's a difficult thing to come to terms with and as you say, many people have to go through it so I find the ways that everyone deals with it very interesting. Personally I have always trended towards valuing effort and conviction over results so it wasn't too much trouble to give up on my dreams of being the very best.
Also Nada was my favorite Terran when I was young. His legacy is so amazing.
One of the common traps I see when it comes to this is getting bitter over "god-given talent", but I never saw the point. You can dwell on it all you like but it won't change the reality, best to just deal with it. I contented myself with just being acceptably good at video games and seeking excellence elsewhere. I also think that part of growing up is knowing that no matter what talent you have, you have to realize it with real, actual work. So if you're an adult you should recognise that behind anyone who's really good at something is a mountain of practice. This applies pretty much everywhere, whether it be work/school/games.
NaDa was (and still is) my favourite player of all time just for his uniqueness and his legacy. I watched fpvods of other pros and while they were amazingly good, none of them - literally none - played like he did.
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I like your point of view... a lot of people approach the game with a lack of humbleness. To me, knowing how far out of reach the skill ceiling is just makes it more enjoyable to watch the greats. It's like witnessing a fine piece of art being created. That's why sometimes I feel annoyed that people focus so much on "the scene" (like saying "we must have non-Koreans or its boring!") rather than the game.
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Good read. I had a similar experience with watching Jaedong FPVODs.
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51684 Posts
On April 29 2007 11:11 Rekrul wrote:
One time me and three friends including the pantech coach were playing a use map settings game for over and hour and couldn't beat the damn thing.
Then the Pantech coach said, "I'll call Nada."
Crushed it on the first try.
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I like how every nerd on the internet considers themself "gifted but just unfocused/uninterested". Seems statistically impossible that almost everyone would be like that no? People should come to terms with the fact that they are probably just lazy, of average intelligence, and with no discernable talent. Doesn't mean a healthy dose of perstistance won't get you anywhere though.
Good read btw.
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This was a good read. I remember thinking I was "good" at starcraft and then watching some pro replays. This must have been early 2000s. They were literally doing things I'd never seen... I've been hooked ever since.
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On September 10 2017 16:47 B.I.G. wrote:
I like how every nerd on the internet considers themself "gifted but just unfocused/uninterested". Seems statistically impossible that almost everyone would be like that no? People should come to terms with the fact that they are probably just lazy, of average intelligence, and with no discernable talent. Doesn't mean a healthy dose of perstistance won't get you anywhere though.
Good read btw.
I think it's systemic. I don't know about people being unusually gifted or above average intelligence, but I do think a lot of people fail to approach their potential. Poor conditions for learning, poor instructors, lack of instruction, lack of resources or awareness of available resources.
I think some people see a person who has mastered their craft, and recoil in awe of it, saying they will never be as good, so here's the perfect excuse to give up early. Other people think 'I want to be able to do that too.' Which one they think is just dependent on stuff like motivation and confidence.
One of the great lessons I learned in my life was that I am a lot more capable than I first thought, and that when I work at something, things that were mysterious and incomprehensible to me before become clear and obvious. You might not become the pinnacle of humanity at something, but almost all people can become experts and masters of something, enough that they could put someone in awe.
All that to say I really loathe the false humbleness of giving up and then thinking giving up is somehow wisdom. Yes, give up on being a pro because the structure to succeed does not exist for you, you don't live in Korea and you don't want to give your life to a game. But don't give up because you think something takes supernatural talent. I hate that because people who do that tend to also put other people down, saying things are impossible if you don't have supernatural talent, giving bad advice, glorifying normal people. All my StarCraft heroes were my heroes because I admired their dedication, not because I thought they were inhuman. I only even wanted to try to be so dedicated to something in my own life, not to dedicate myself to StarCraft. I know you leave that trailing comment about persistence, but it rings so hollow after you say people who believe in themselves are full of it. How can you motivate yourself to do anything if you don't think you'll do great? Who wants to spend hours practicing something they think they'll be bad at? That belief in your gifts and abilities is prerequisite to dedication.
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TLADT24920 Posts
yep, nada is fast, real fast lol. It's extremely impressive to see how far these progamers pushed the limits. Even if some of it is a bit spammy, the fact that they are able to process all the information and react fast enough in dire situations, well, it's amazing imo. Of course, even the most attentive progamer can lose as well (think Nada to Savior or Flash to EffOrt etc...).
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Well I personally find this ironic!
+ Show Spoiler +https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4_OD2dwFuQ
This VOD from 2002(?) or maybe it's 2003 (FPVOd of NaDa vs Sonic)Black on some TV-show) is what made me realize that there's really close to no boundaries when it comes to how well you can execute things in the game, it made me realize that a lot of gain could be made in terms of overall skill if you just focused heavily on improving your mechanics. I've, contrary to you, always regarded this VOD as one of the reasons that I would keep on pushing to get better. For me it was sort of a moment of realization where I said to myself "hey, I don't need to be a genius like BoxeR to be good at this game, I can just execute things way better and potentially beat someone like BoxeR".
EDIT: To be fair NaDa is also Genius Terran so I mean.. but you get the point 
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Are these stories of NaDa being one of the laziest really true? It almost impossible to imagine how somebody can be so good without massive amounts of practice.
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On September 12 2017 23:09 merz wrote:
I've, contrary to you, always regarded this VOD as one of the reasons that I would keep on pushing to get better. For me it was sort of a moment of realization where I said to myself "hey, I don't need to be a genius like BoxeR to be good at this game, I can just execute things way better and potentially beat someone like BoxeR".
Ha ha, interesting that you've come to an opposite conclusion. I actually thought the exact reverse; what BoxeR did was fantastic, for sure, but it was only human. His plans and micromanagement could be done by anyone, there was nothing miraculous about his execution - obviously they weren't, and that was what made him special, even legendary. But there was no veil to be lifted back, no mystery about how he executed his play. If you watch a BoxeR fpvod, there's nothing special about it - everything that made Boxer what he was was done "outside the game", so to speak. That was what initially blew my mind about NaDa (of course, then oov came along and simplified everything down to 'just macro and don't waste any apm' and proved to be one of the strongest players of all time, but hey).
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EPT![[image loading]](http://i276.photobucket.com/albums/kk5/neverggg/heritage/01-1.jpg)
