• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 03:12
CET 08:12
KST 16:12
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
ByuL: The Forgotten Master of ZvT29Behind the Blue - Team Liquid History Book19Clem wins HomeStory Cup 289HomeStory Cup 28 - Info & Preview13Rongyi Cup S3 - Preview & Info8
Community News
Blizzard Classic Cup - Tastosis announced as captains7Weekly Cups (March 2-8): ByuN overcomes PvT block4GSL CK - New online series18BSL Season 224Vitality ends partnership with ONSYDE20
StarCraft 2
General
Blizzard Classic Cup - Tastosis announced as captains GSL CK - New online series Weekly Cups (March 2-8): ByuN overcomes PvT block Weekly Cups (Feb 23-Mar 1): herO doubles, 2v2 bonanza Vitality ends partnership with ONSYDE
Tourneys
[GSL CK] Team Maru vs. Team herO WardiTV Team League Season 10 Master Swan Open (Global Bronze-Master 2) RSL Season 4 announced for March-April Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament
Strategy
Custom Maps
Publishing has been re-enabled! [Feb 24th 2026] Map Editor closed ?
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 516 Specter of Death Mutation # 515 Together Forever Mutation # 514 Ulnar New Year
Brood War
General
Are you ready for ASL 21? Hype VIDEO ASL21 General Discussion Gypsy to Korea BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ Recent recommended BW games
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues IPSL Spring 2026 is here! ASL Season 21 Qualifiers March 7-8 BWCL Season 64 Announcement
Strategy
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Soma's 9 hatch build from ASL Game 2 Fighting Spirit mining rates Zealot bombing is no longer popular?
Other Games
General Games
Nintendo Switch Thread PC Games Sales Thread Path of Exile No Man's Sky (PS4 and PC) Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion The Story of Wings Gaming
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Five o'clock TL Mafia Mafia Game Mode Feedback/Ideas Vanilla Mini Mafia TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Mexico's Drug War Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine YouTube Thread
Fan Clubs
The IdrA Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
[Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books [Manga] One Piece
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion General nutrition recommendations Cricket [SPORT] TL MMA Pick'em Pool 2013
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Laptop capable of using Photoshop Lightroom?
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Iranian anarchists: organize…
XenOsky
FS++
Kraekkling
Shocked by a laser…
Spydermine0240
Gaming-Related Deaths
TrAiDoS
Unintentional protectionism…
Uldridge
ASL S21 English Commentary…
namkraft
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 1471 users

Anatomy of an Obituary

Blogs > Dienosore
Post a Reply
Dienosore
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Brunei Darussalam622 Posts
March 31 2013 07:50 GMT
#1
This week has been a milestone for me. It has been a month since I have started working as a reporter for the newspaper. I have already grown more as a writer in this time than I did after a years worth of English college classes. The people that I work with have been super friendly and are always willing to give advice about stuff like grammar, how to approach a piece or where to find sources.

The purpose of this blog is to teach you guys what I am learning. I want to share what little bit I know.

According to the senior reporter who I was shadowing, there are 5 rules new recruits are encouraged to learn when joining the writing team.

1) Be nice to the janitor.
Aside from common courtesy, having the janitor on your side is always a good thing. Also, sometimes they own the building.

2) Always show up to work late.
If you establish yourself as someone who shows up early in the beginning of your career, you will always be expected to show up early.

3) Lunch should be taken early.
No need to wait for 12 noon to eat lunch. Always try to dip out a few minutes early to maximize downtime.

4) It's always the IT guys fault.
If you are late on an assignment or you have missed an email, you can always blame it on electronics. Try these easy phrases out on your boss in a time of crisis:
"I don't know what happened, our system seems to eat messages all the time. I'll have to call the IT guy and see what's going on."
"I sent that email yesterday. It should be in there. Damn system is always messing up. I'll have to call the IT guy and see what's going on."

5) Always try to go to the scene of the story in person.
Two main reasons. First, so you can get details of the story and get down to the nitty gritty with on-site interviews. Sometimes stuff will come out that adds to or totally changes your story. Second reason is to maximize time spent out of the office.


The next thing I will teach you is how to write an obituary. This was the first skill I learned, and it is something that I still do constantly. People die every day. If you can write an obituary, you will always have a steady job.
At first, I tried to read the notifications from the funeral homes and looked at each one as a small story. I carefully constructed the deceased's info to make it sound like they had lived a full and healthy life. Unfortunately, this is exactly what not to do in an obituary. Space in a newspaper is a highly valued thing. If you have obituaries running over two full pages, then it better be because the plauge has just killed thousands in your area. You must be concise and as robotic as possible to avoid any mistakes that might anger the surviving family.
In order to achieve this tone and structure, I created a template that I use for each obituary that I write. It looks like this:

[Name]
[Town]--[Name], [Age], of [Town], died [Date], at [Place of Death].
Service will be held at [Time] [Day] at [Location] with the Rev. [Reverend's Name] officiating.
[Preceded in death by spouse]
[Brief Bio; 2-3 sentences max]
Survivors include [Survivors].
The family will receive friends at [Time][Day] at [Place of Visitation].
Memorials may be left at [Location].
Condolences may be left at [Location, Usually Website].
Arrangements are by [Funeral Home].

Just plug in the relevant info. After I made this template, the entire obituary process exponentially sped up for me. I was now able to do three times as much work in the same amount of time it would have taken before.
What this means is that by using this template, I now have more free time to spend doing other things at the newsroom; stuff like pretending to hunt down some contact for another story or watching basketball with the sports guys.

Since this discovery was such a huge success, I decided to make another template. This time, I would tackle the Blotter section. For those who do not know, Blotters are the little stories that you write about people who have been arrested for felonies that are not main headlines. They are short little things about stuff like possession of drugs or larceny. These arrests are all documented in paper at the local magistrates office, and it is my job to go down there and look at them all to pull out the interesting ones. In addition to providing juicy details for blotter, the whole process serves as a way to keep a check on our police force. We are able to see that people are not getting unfair punishments.

Anyway, the template looks like this:

[One word for the crime; ie. Drugs, or Theft]
[Name], [Age], of [Street name], [Town name] is charged by [Police Department] with [List of every charge against criminal].
[Last name] is accused of [Brief explanation of the crime here. It can be a couple sentences. Use the information written in the police report to get details and specifics], according to warrants.
Bond was set at $[Amount].

Blotters are just quick little mini-stories. They get published once a week, so when deadline rolls around I usually write nine or ten of these buggers. It's kinda cool to have access to all the warrants down at the magistrates office. I get to hobnob around with important officials, while at the same time I feel like I am keeping a pulse on the criminal underground.


The thing obituaries and blotters have in common is that there is no 'written by' line. This so that survivors and angry drug lords wont get mad at the messenger (aka me).

Ok TL, that's it for now. As always, I'll be monitoring this for a while to reply to you guys :D Use the skills I just taught you and you will go far. <3

*****
fight_or_flight
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States3988 Posts
March 31 2013 08:13 GMT
#2
Very interesting, thanks for sharing.
Do you really want chat rooms?
DusTerr
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
2520 Posts
March 31 2013 12:58 GMT
#3
Always interesting to hear little things about different lines of work!
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 2h 48m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
ProTech122
StarCraft: Brood War
actioN 377
Leta 259
ZergMaN 112
-ZergGirl 88
Sharp 51
ToSsGirL 24
Bale 21
Backho 14
Dota 2
XaKoH 363
NeuroSwarm124
League of Legends
JimRising 691
Counter-Strike
Stewie2K865
m0e_tv544
Super Smash Bros
hungrybox503
Other Games
WinterStarcraft528
C9.Mang0273
Mew2King25
Happy3
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick514
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 14 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Berry_CruncH267
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Scarra1696
• Rush1447
• Stunt597
Upcoming Events
The PondCast
2h 48m
WardiTV Team League
4h 48m
Replay Cast
16h 48m
Replay Cast
1d 16h
CranKy Ducklings
2 days
RSL Revival
2 days
WardiTV Team League
2 days
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
2 days
BSL
2 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
3 days
[ Show More ]
RSL Revival
3 days
WardiTV Team League
3 days
BSL
3 days
Replay Cast
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
Wardi Open
4 days
Monday Night Weeklies
4 days
WardiTV Team League
5 days
GSL
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2026-03-11
WardiTV Winter 2026
Underdog Cup #3

Ongoing

KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 1
Jeongseon Sooper Cup
BSL Season 22
RSL Revival: Season 4
Nations Cup 2026
ESL Pro League S23 Stage 1&2
PGL Cluj-Napoca 2026
IEM Kraków 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter Qual

Upcoming

CSL Elite League 2026
ASL Season 21
Acropolis #4 - TS6
2026 Changsha Offline CUP
Acropolis #4
IPSL Spring 2026
CSLAN 4
HSC XXIX
uThermal 2v2 2026 Main Event
Bellum Gens Elite Stara Zagora 2026
NationLESS Cup
CS Asia Championships 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
PGL Astana 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
CCT Season 3 Global Finals
IEM Rio 2026
PGL Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 1
BLAST Open Spring 2026
ESL Pro League S23 Finals
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.